Disclaimer: I do not own Death Note, sadly.
Warnings: SMEX, angst.
Pairings: L/Raito, Raito/L
Summary: L finds a new addiction. Will he be able to break it or will it be his down fall? SMEX. L/Raito, Raito/L
Notes: Thanks for the comments/reviews. Please tell me what you think. This is the last chapter for this story. Hope you enjoyed it.
Chapter Eleven:
Surprised to hear Watari's voice again, Yagami asks, "What is it you need?" He must know about the favor first before doing it. Maybe it concerns his son.
"L is depressed and I believe Yagami-kun is as well." Watari answers honestly.
"I don't think Raito wants to see L again." Yagami retorts while staring at the pictures of his family. After talking to Watari the first time, he finally noticed how his son's eyes didn't shine when he smiled. He only saw them shine a few times and that was when Raito was with L.
"I believe they are being stubborn about their feelings. They want each other but refuse to act on their emotions. I will give an address bring Raito."
While writing down the address, Yagami responds, "I'll be there tomorrow morning." After Watari gives his thanks, the line is disconnected and he stares once again at the photos. When did his son become a great actor?
Upstairs, Raito wants the older man to call again, but that won't happen. It was in L's voice that said it was over with. As he curls his body up, he mumbles, "But I don't want it to be over." He hates to admit it but part of him needs the older man in his life. It is just too boring without L in it. As he closes his eyes, he mutters, "It's over." Those words hurt his chest more than anything and he hates feeling so weak. He falls asleep with regret.
The next day, Raito wakes up with his father saying something to him. He doesn't want to hear anything but L's voice. He goes with his father, not caring where he is heading. What is the point when it will be the same thing? As he looks out the window, he finds himself in front of a hotel. With a raised eyebrow, he asks, "Why are we here?"
"To see Ryuuzaki off."
His eyes widen to hear the older man is in Japan again. Why didn't the other tell him? Exiting the car, Raito feels the need to run far away but at the same time he wants to run to L. What does he really want? Does he want to be with L knowing it will only bring more pain to his heart? Or does he want to save his heart the pain and leave? Without realizing it, he follows his father inside.
In a hotel room, L stares out the window again, glancing down at his phone once in a while. Part of him wants to call Raito but logic tells him to not bring more sorrow to the teenager. The words Raito said to him ring hollow inside of his head and it hurts him more than he likes to admit. After all, he did risk his entire career to save Raito. Hearing the door open, he speaks, "I am almost ready."
"Ready to leave for good." A voice says behind L.
Turning around in surprise, L stares stun to see Raito staring there, looking lost. When did it become easy to read the younger man? During the Kira Case, he could never figure out what Raito was thinking. Now, he can see so many different emotions running wild in Raito's eyes. Finally figuring out who told Raito about the hotel, he asks, "Why did Yagami-kun come?"
"Dad drove me here." Raito answers without letting his emotions out in his voice. He isn't sure what he wants anymore. Can he forgive L? Can he forgive himself? Will their mistakes stop? Stepping forward, he lets his heart talk, "I miss you."
"That is not what Yagami-kun said last night." L responds in a monotone voice. Letting the other stay will hurt him in the end. His life is dangerous and their relationship will be difficult. Lips touch his and he loses his thoughts for a second. The relationship is what he wants. When did he do something he wanted? As arms wrap around his neck, he feels every emotion coming from Raito in the kiss. Pulling the younger man closer, he breaks the kiss and whispers, "You will suffer."
"I don't care."
'You will.' L thinks but doesn't say it aloud. When Raito's head leans on his shoulder, he runs his fingers through light brown hair. This is what he desires and wants the most. Pulling back, he stares into Raito's eyes, seeing the desire in them. Caressing Raito's face, he mutters, "One day when I have to be gone for who knows when, you will want something more. Something I will never be able to give to you." He wants the other man to understand what risks are involved. He can never stop being L the detective even if the man L wants to live a peaceful life. Detective work is all he knows.
Staring at L, seeing no emotion at all, Raito knows what the other is trying to say. There will be a chance that L might never return during a case. There will always be a risk L dies on an assignment. He knows that L might be gone for a while unable to call him to let him know if everything is all right. Yes, he knows he will feel the sorrow and hurt. Pulling the detective toward him, kissing L with everything that is inside of him, and trying his best to speak the words that he can never say, he pulls back a little with his eyes train on L. Would their relationship really work? Maybe not and maybe it will, but he has to take the risk.
His hand rises up and caresses Raito's face. The risks are high and he knows this but he doesn't care. Leaning forward, L whispers, "You will never have control with me."
Laughing loudly, Raito holds onto the older man while responding, "One day I will."
Kissing Raito's head, inhaling Raito's scent, L holds onto the other, knowing that their time is short. Releasing his hold, seeing the confusion on Raito's face, he explains, "My flight leaves in an hour. I have to go solve a case."
"I could go…"
L states, cutting the younger man off, "Finish school, Raito. After that, we can see where it takes us."
As he touches L's face, Raito whispers, "I want one time before you leave."
Throwing away his logic for once, L takes Raito into his arms, kissing the younger man with passion. He might be gone for a while, but he will make the most of the time he has. As he walks backwards, still lip locked with Raito, he bumps into his bedroom door. Breaking the kiss, opening the door, he shoves the teenager inside.
Unable to hold back his own desire and his need for L, Raito pulls his shirt over his head, throwing it somewhere in the room. As pale hands run across his naked chest, teasing his nipples, he moans while grabbing a hold of the detective to prevent him from falling, "L."
Pushing the teenager backwards until Raito hits the bed and lays down on it; L climbs on top of the younger man, kissing him with everything he can never say. Hands find their way on his body, ripping off his clothing. After a few seconds, he stares down at Raito's naked form.
Staring up at the pale body before him, Raito whispers, "Let me, please."
Understanding the meaning behind those words, L lies down on the bed and watches Raito lean over him. Is he giving up control? Will he let the other have him? Before he could answer his questions, he feels a wet sensation over his neck down to his chest. Running his fingers through soft brown hair, he groans, "Raito."
Hearing his name be called out in such a voice makes his cock jump. Raito wants to hear more of L's unguarded voice. As he moves down L's body, he finds the older man's sensitive spots. Kissing, nipping, and biting the pale skin, he stares down at the stiffen cock. Licking his lips, he wonders if he could make L scream for him.
Wondering why the other stopped pleasing, L opens his eyes to groan in desire. Right between his legs Raito's head lies. When Raito looks up at him unsure what to do next, he grabs Raito by his hair and pushes his head down. Feeling the wet warmth around his cock, he buckles his hips and moans, "Raito."
Pleased with himself, Raito continues to bob his head up and down, sucking on L's length, enjoying the sounds L makes in the heat of passion. When his head is torn away from a juicy treat, he whimpers. One look at L, he knows why he was stopped. Climbing on top of the detective, he whispers huskily, "I don't know…" His words die when he feels greasy fingers slide into his opening. Pushing back to meet the thrust, he moans, "L… L… when did…" He looks over to find the lube lying on the bed. Throwing his head back, he screams wanting the older man inside of him, "L! Please. Just…"
"It will hurt you more."
"I don't… don't care."
Lifting Raito over his stiff cock, L watches amazed as the beautiful man slides himself down, taking him in one go. Raito's head is thrown back in pain and pleasure. As his hands run up Raito's side, he whispers breathless, "My Raito. All mine."
Unable to hold back his own needs, Raito lifts himself up and then right back down, hitting that one spot that makes him see stars in his eyes. Feeling L's hands grip his waist, he whimpers, "More."
Thrusting upwards, meeting Raito's hips, L moans out. All he can hear is those beautiful sounds coming from his lover's mouth. This is where he wants to be forever. He wants to forget about the cases of death and victims.
"L!"
"Raito!"
Pushing the younger man onto the bed, L begins to thrust hard and fast, wanting to release his tension quickly but at the same make it last forever. As he rubs his hand up and down Raito's cock, he blocks out all his mind's thoughts and listens to every whimper, moan, pant, and hitch of breath that comes from his younger lover.
Arching his back upward, feeling his eyes roll in the back of his head, Raito screams out loudly, "L!"
Feeling Raito's release over his hand and the muscles tighten around his cock, L thrusts a few more times before releasing inside the younger man. As he pulls out and flops beside the younger man, he lets his heart beat calm down before he speaks, "I missed you."
With his eyes closed, Raito mutters half-asleep, "I love you, L."
Kissing Raito's forehead, L leans forward and whispers into Raito's ear, "I love you too, my Light."
Raito smiles in his sleep and mutters while curling closer to the warmth, "L."
Pushing brown hair to the side, L kisses Raito's forehead again and enjoys the moment. He has no choice but to leave soon. As he stands up, he ensures the younger man is covered. He truly wishes not to leave but work calls. After he cleans himself up, dressed in his usually clothes, L writes a note and lies it beside Raito. He will ensure he comes back. For the first time, he knows what home feels like.
Later on, Raito wakes to his back sore. Uncurling himself and groaning, he finds a note lying beside him. As he glances around the room to find no one around, he feels his heart tug at him but ignores the pain. Sitting up, letting the blanket slide down his body, he stares at the note and picks it up.
Raito (Light),
I know Raito must feel hurt right now. I am truly sorry but this is how it will be. Even if the man behind the L title wishes to stay, the detective L must continue his work. Solving cases is all I have every known and I cannot break that habit for no one. If Raito is willing to stay behind for periods of time, then this can work between us. I would understand if Raito does not wish for that type of relationship. Watari is still around and will relay any message if Raito has any.
Truly yours,
L Lawliet
PS. That name is mine; keep it close to your heart.
As he rereads the letter again, Raito feels a smile break though. Hearing the door open, he turns his head to find Watari giving him a small smile. Making up his mind, he tells the elderly man, "Tell Lawliet, I will wait."