You woke up in pieces
From making these changes
Won't write you an anthem
On the outside I'm trying
Cause inside I'm dying
This broken heart was stronger then
Now I can't stand to part
With this broken heart
Rory exhaled slowly, looking out at the scenery as Blake's Landrover sped down the freeway. She chewed on her bottom lip, her head against the window. Shane was in the back with his headphones on and Blake glanced at his sister, "So..." he said quietly, looking back to the road, "...he's back."
She sighed, not breaking her gaze from the trees along the highway, "Yes he is."
"How're you doing?"
Rory shrugged, blinking slowly, "I've been better."
Blake laughed uncomfortably, "Yeah, I bet."
She laughed as well, rolling her eyes at her brother, "He's coming over tomorrow."
"What? Why?"
"Physics teacher asked me to tutor him."
Blake laughed for real this time, "Shut up."
She smiled lightly, looking over at him, "For real. Me and Paris have his highest averages and since I'm more of a people person than she is he asked me to tutor Tristan."
"That sucks."
"Yeah."
"So what does Adam think of this?"
She shook her head, "I didn't even think about telling him." she looked back out the window, "I mean, I'm still trying to wrap my brain around the fact that he's back. I really can't believe it."
Blake nodded, "I know what you mean."
"It's just..." she trailed off, inhaling deeply, "It's like he came out of nowhere. No warning. No call. Nobody knew."
Her brother just nodded, slowly, turning onto their exit, "So then he's coming over tomorrow?"
"Yeah."
"Time?"
"Five."
His face fell, "Oh."
"What?"
He shook his head, shrugging, "Nothing."
"Blake." she said slowly, looking at him.
He inhaled deeply, "It's just...I won't be home." he glanced at their brother in the rearview mirror, "And neither will Shane."
Her head cocked back, surprised, "What?"
"Yeah. I'm going to Maddy's at four thirty and Shane's going to his friends house to play paintball. I'm dropping him off on my way."
Her eyes widened, "But-"
"Sorry."
She shook her head, "I'm gonna kill you."
"Yeah, I know."
"Blake. . . . . . ." she whined, closing her eyes.
He laughed, "It'll be good, though."
Her eyebrow arched, "And how is that?"
"You two have a lot of shit to work out."
"Blake-" she warned, turning to face him.
He shook his head, "Seriously, Rory. You and Tristan need to get through this shit you two have. You'll both be miserable until you do." She rolled her eyes and looked back out the window, but didn't say anything.
NEXT DAY
Rory rolled her neck in a circle to relieve the tension. It was five and he wasn't here...at least his non-punctuality was still in place. She sighed, standing and going to the fridge to make sure they had drinks and food in case he was hungry. They did. The cook was really good about going to the market...which was definitely a plus for them because no one in their family ever went shopping. Whenever they went on vacation, they had coffee and doughnuts at the house for breakfast, and they'd eat out for the rest of the day. Sometimes they wouldn't even get the doughnuts...just the coffee.
She realized she was babbling in her head and sighed, looking over at the clock. 5:05. And then the doorbell rang. Rory stood, closing her eyes before slowly walking to the door. She opened it tentatively to see Tristan standing on the front step, looking around at the front yard while scratching the back of his head. He turned to look at her upon hearing the door open. Rory bit her lip and opened it wider, inviting him in. "Hey."
He glanced over at her, "Hey."
"Do you want anything to drink?"
He stepped into the foyer, shrugging off his jacket, "No thanks."
She nodded, closing the door, "You hungry?"
Tristan shook his head and hung his jacket over one of the arms of the coatrack, "I'm good."
"Okay then..." she looked around the foyer, "Uh, we'll work in the livingroom." He bit the insides of his cheeks, watching her as he nodded slowly. And looking at him right then, she knew it was a trait he'd picked up from Jess. The nodding like, 'okay, can we move on?'. And he knew it would annoy her. She rolled her eyes, "Come on, then." and made her way out of the room. He grinned, following her.
Tristan entered the livingroom to see her making her way over to the couch. Her books were already on the table. She sat in a whirl of dark hair and frustration. Frustration that he knew he was the root of. He tossed his own books on the table carelessly and dropped himself next to her. "So, what now, teach?"
She rolled her eyes before looking at him, he was doing this stupid 'the world can bite my ass, I don't care about you' act. "Did you use the same book at your old school?" He nodded silently, watching her. "And you only got to chapter four?" again he nodded silently. Rory shifted uncomfortably. Why was he just staring? "Did you finish chapter four?" another nod. "Okay, you can look somewhere else now." He smirked lightly, but didn't look away. "Why are you looking at me like that?"
He licked his bottom lip, breaking his gaze from her and picking up his book, "Just admiring."
She reached for her book as well, "Well don't."
"Oh, Mary, I can't help it."
Rory's gaze rose to him slowly, "Don't call me that."
"Why not?"
She shook her head, "Tristan, you can't keep using terms of endearment after you're broken up."
"Says who?"
"Says everyone. I'm not getting into this with you. Don't call me Mary."
He looked over at her, his smirk not falling, "But that's your name."
"You're not funny."
"Well then I guess it's a good thing that I'm not trying to be."
She rolled her eyes, standing up, "Fuck off, Tristan." and she made her way out of the livingroom.
He swore under his breath, standing up. He hadn't meant to piss her off. "Rory, wait up." he jogged out of the room. Coming into the hall, he looked around to see her ignoring him and walking upstairs. Shaking his head, he followed her, "Rory, seriously. Hold up. I didn't mean to be a dick."
She laughed humorlessly, not turning to face him as she continued upstairs, "Yeah right."
He caught up with her at the top and grabbed her wrist, turning her around to face him, "Seriously, Ror. White flag." She tilted her head, pursing her lips. "I was a dick." He released her wrist, "Truce?"
She bit her lip, shaking her head, "Tristan-"
He cut her off, "Look, you help me and I will be a perfect gentleman." Her eyebrow arched and he smirked, "What? I will."
She shook her head, "This was a really bad idea."
He turned her around and led her down the stairs, "And why is that?"
"Because we can't get along." she said simply. Tristan stopped walking and she turned to look at him, "What?"
He glanced down at her, "So then you accept the truce?"
She rolled her eyes, "Do I really have a choice?"
He shrugged. She had a point. "Well then I have a proposition."
Her eyebrow arched, "Oh yeah?"
"Yeah."
"Do tell."
He started walking back down the stairs and she joined him after a moment. "Do you really feel like working on physics?"
"No."
"Neither do I, and let's face it: with our current situation we wouldn't get anything done anyways." She nodded thoughtfully and he continued, "So today instead of working on that why don't we just talk?"
They were now at the bottom of the staircase and she stopped, her eyebrows furrowed as she turned to face him, "Talk?"
"Yes, talk. It's awkward with us and we both know it, so why don't we work through all our shit now and make it easier on ourselves?"
She thought it over for a moment. They never even got it together while they were dating. What the hell made him think they could function together now that they were broken up and hadn't spoken in nearly a year? She shook her head, "Tristan, I don't know..." she trailed off.
"Rory, come on. I really don't want to do physics." he whined, grabbing the end of her sleeve and pulling her into the livingroom, "Besides, we have a lot to work out. You avoided me all day today-" she opened her mouth to protest, but he cut her off, "-we'll never be able to stand in the same room unless we get this worked out."
She bit her lip, shaking her head. She could not get involved in him again. It would kill her. She pulled her sleeve from his grip, "I don't want to talk." she said quietly.
He stopped, turning to look at her and all amusement was suddenly gone, "Why not?" he wasn't mad. . . . . . .just curious.
She swallowed, looking away from him and blinking rapidly. They needed to get back to yelling and being mad. He couldn't look at her like that. He couldn't be cutesy and funny. They couldn't be like they used to. As long as she was mad she didn't have to feel. "Tristan. . . . . . " she trailed off, inhaling deeply.
She jumped in surprise as she felt his hands on either side of her face, "Rory." he said quietly,
turning her head to face him. She adverted her gaze. He couldn't be doing this. She couldn't look at him. "Rory." he said again, just as gently. His thumb trailed along her cheekbone gently, "Look at me." he whispered. Without blinking her gaze came slowly to meet his and he could see tears in her eyes. "Rory, I'm here, okay? I am all here." he wiped away a tear that escaped, "I'm not going anywhere." She bit the insides of her cheeks, her eyelids fluttering as she looked away. The muscles in Tristan's jaw flexed as he checked the urge to kiss her and he removed his hands.
Rory rolled her eyes, pushing back tears, "Fine, let's talk."
HALF AN HOUR LATER
They sat on the couch, books forgotten on the coffee table as they hashed out the past year. They'd already covered Rory's relationship with Adam, Tristan's friends back in North Carolina, Lorelai's accident and recovery, and what had gone on with their friends here in Connecticut. Now they were sitting in a comfortable silence, Rory drumming her fingers on her soda can while Tristan glanced around the room. She fixed her eyes on the cushion between them, speaking quietly, "So then it really is true?"
He glanced over at her, "What is?"
"You left because of me." she looked up at him slowly, "Your parents made you leave because of me."
He looked down, shaking his head, "My dad gave me an ultimatum and I made a choice. Don't be so hard on yourself."
She turned to look at the wall directly in front of her, "Why didn't you just break up with me?"
He snorted lightly, shaking his head as he whispered under his breath, "You have no idea what you do to me."
She turned to face him, "What?"
He looked up, shaking his head, "I couldn't. I mean. . . . " he looked away, "I wanted to. Tried to a few times, but I couldn't."
"And now?" she asked quietly.
He scratched the back of his head, obviously not liking this topic, "Now I have to keep you two as acquaintances." She nodded slowly, neither speaking. He looked down at his hands and she looked at the coffee table. "So then, are you happy with him?" he asked.
She pursed her lips thoughtfully, "He's a really good guy, Tristan."
"But are you happy?"
Rory pulled her knees to her chest, "I'm content."
"Oh yeah?"
She nodded slowly, "Yeah." Tristan nodded as well, still not looking up at her. They sat in a comfortable silence, both thinking over the past, though neither would admit it. Finally after several minutes she spoke quietly, "Welcome home, Tristan."
He nodded, his gaze still on his hands, "Thanks."
FRIDAY
Rory sat in second period, Adam to her right, Pairs to her left, and Tristan behind her. After they'd talked Tuesday they were okay. . . . . . . .it was weird, them being okay. She was shocked that it only took an hour of talking for them to be comfortable after almost a year. She was still mad, of course. And he knew that. It would take her longer than a few days to get over what had happened.
Adam and Tristan didn't like each other, and it didn't take a brain surgeon to figure it out. They were both very territorial guys. Tristan probably had more of a right to be territorial of everyone. . . . . . . . in more ways than one. But Adam probably felt that he was entitled to things since he'd been there for months and Tristan hadn't. She watched them interact. It was tense and forced, and only happened when necessary.
At the moment she was turned sideways, facing Adam while they discussed their plans for this weekend. Katie Black's party that night, Craig Roberts was turning fifty on Saturday (they were both being forced to attend the party his wife was throwing for him), and dinner on Sunday. They were deciding what restaurant to go to when she felt Tristan's hand land on her side and stay there. She turned to look at him and saw that he was staring at his Physics book intently and had reached for her without thinking. He hadn't even realized that he was still touching her, "Hey Ror, can you explain this to me?" he asked, turning the book around so that she could read it.
He finally realized his hand was still on her side and removed it, looking up at her to see that she was intently reading the paragraph he'd pointed out. God, she was gorgeous. Her hair fell in front of her face in a sheet. She tucked it behind her ear slowly as she finished the last sentence and looked up at him, their faces were only three inches apart. He could feel her breath and smell her shampoo. It would've been so easy to lean forward and kiss her, but he couldn't. What he really wanted to do was look over at Adam and see his reaction, but he was too distracted by the way her lips were moving and her eyes were locked with his. He nodded every time she paused or said, "Understand?" It took a few minutes of her lovely mouth in constant motion until she stopped talking and asked, "You get it now?"
He blinked slowly, glancing down at the book. Was she done? He hadn't heard a word she'd said. "Yeah. Thanks." She grinned before laughing lightly and turning back around in her seat. He looked up at the back of her head and swore at himself. He'd just have to figure it out on his own.
Adam watch their interaction, his jaw tightening. He didn't want to be mad. He didn't want to be jealous, but he saw the way Tristan was looking at Rory. He wasn't listening to anything she was saying. He was just watching her. Had he only asked her to help him so that she'd give him some attention? Pathetic. Of course, staying with a girl that didn't feel half of what he felt might make him pathetic as well. He was about to lean over to her and continue planning out the weekend, but the bell rang. They all stood and threw their things in their bags.
"Adam, Rory, you guys going to Katie's party tonight?" Louise asked, standing up.
"Yeah." she answered, not looking up as she zipped her bookbag.
Louise nodded, smirking as she turned to the blonde behind Rory, "Dugrey?"
He smirked as well, "Louise, baby, what kind of party would it be if I wasn't there?"
Paris laughed, standing up, "Well, we're all anxious to see how your first party back will be."
"All the freshmen trying to pull you upstairs." Madeline grinned, standing as well.
"All the upperclassmen trying to fuck you on the dance floor." Louise supplied, laughing at the look on his face.
"Good luck with that." Rory said, grinning as she stood from her seat. He looked over at her, his jaw dropping playfully.
"You mean all four of you would stand by and let them attack me?"
Rory laughed, throwing her bookbag over her shoulder as she made her way through the desks to the door. Paris grinned, "We might save you after a couple hours."
"Mean." he said quietly, shaking his head at them.
Madeline laughed, patting his arm gently as she, Louise and Paris made their way from the room. Rory, Adam, and Tristan were the last ones to leave. "Mister Hart, I need to talk to you about your homework from last night." the teacher called.
He glanced down at Rory and she leaned up, kissing him lightly, "I'll see you at lunch."
He nodded, "Bye baby." He glanced up at Tristan, shooting him a dirty look over Rory's head. The blonde held his hands up innocently and walked out of the classroom with Rory.
They were halfway to their lockers before either spoke. "So." Tristan said slowly, "You are going to the party?"
She nodded, "That's the plan."
He bit the insides of his cheeks thoughtfully, "Huh."
"What?" she glanced up at him as she stopped at her locker.
He pursed his lips loosely, shaking his head, "Nothing." she just gave him a look and he shrugged, "We've had some fun at parties, that's all. They've been very enjoyable experiences in the past. I'm just looking forward to it."
She narrowed her eyes warningly , "Tristan."
"What? We used to have a lot of fun-"
She cut him off as she opened her locker, "Don't."
"I'm not doing anything."
She sighed, shaking her head. Every time they made any progress he made them slip back, "Yes you are. Don't think I didn't see the way you and Adam were looking at each other."
"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"
She smirked. If he could be a dick, she could be a bitch. "You can't stand it."
His eyes narrowed dangerously, "Can't stand what?"
"To see me with Adam. It kills you."
"Oh, what? The Beave?"
"Don't be a jackass." she snapped, pulling books out of her locker.
His eyebrow arched, "What? You don't think he'd fit in with the Cleavers?"
"Stop."
"-cause I think he'd fit in very nicely-"
"Tristan!"
He leaned with his arm against the locker next to hers, smirking, "Oh yeah, pain." he laid his hand over the left side of his chest sarcastically. But he could've sworn he was feeling it crack beneath his palm. Why was she being like this? Yeah, the party comment had been low, but this was below th belt.
She rolled her eyes, "Nice sarcastic act.. I know it really does hurt you. You can't stand to see me happy with him."
He wanted to hate her. He really wanted to just go numb, but he couldn't. Not anymore. He'd been numb for years before he'd met her. And now. . . . . . .he couldn't have felt more if he'd tried. But he could always make her think he didn't. "Happy and returned to your previous state of purity."
She closed her locker and twirled around to face him, "What the hell is that supposed to mean?"
He pushed himself off the locker and leaned forward, whispering, "Either you guys never make it to the bedroom, or else he doesn't fuck you the way I did." Her jaw dropped slightly. She couldn't believe he'd just said that. He'd never said anything like that to her. Upon her silence his eyebrows arched, "Ah, so it's the first one, then?" She wanted to slap him, but didn't get the chance when he stepped forward and pressed his body against hers, trapping her against the locker with her hands pinned at her sides. He trailed his index finger along her neck, looking down at her in a way that scared her and made her blush at the same time. His eyes were dark and clouded. . . . . .guarded. But they didn't leave hers. "Rory, I've never had to be cruel to you. You've never seen the way I used to be." He leaned down, whispering in her ear so she could feel his breath on her neck. "I was different before you came around. Don't make me revert back to it." She wanted to hate him, wanted to push him away. It wasn't supposed to feel this way. She wasn't supposed to feel safe and warm while he was being an ass. But she couldn't help it, it felt right. . . . . . so she didn't push him away. "Don't make me show you." he whispered, checking the urge to kiss her neck before he pulled away.
He took a step back and she glared at him before picking up her bookbag, "You're a dick."
Tristan smirked, his eyes raking over every inch of her body, "Oh yeah?"
She shook her head, not bothering to folded her arms over her chest as she saw the way he was looking at her. It would only encourage him. "I can't believe I ever dated you."
His gaze rose to meet hers, "It was the sex." She just gave him a disgusted look before turning to walk in the other direction. He licked his bottom lip before pulling it between his teeth. Oh how he loved to watcher her walk away, "I'll se you tonight. . . . . . .Mary." he called down the hall, not bothering to wait and see if she turned around before heading to their next class, knowing she would ignore him for the rest of the day.
Can't make this right
You see on my face
That I'm not gonna be alright, not tonight
You can read all my letters
But that won't mean things are fine
Nothing this time. . . . . . . . . .
This broken heart was stronger then
Now I can't stand to part with this
This broken heart was stronger than
The word I wish you never meant