Disclaimer: I do not own HP or PJO, and I will never own them unless I win the lottery and buy them, but considering my luck, that won't happen.
Author's Note: Here's chapter 3! If you haven't read the first 2 chapters, then you may have some confusion; and as much as I find others' confusion amusing, I do suggest reading the first two chapters. Also, anyone reading and looking for why I put this under adventure will be happy, because there is some action in this chapter (although the real adventure comes later). I would also like to warn you that I tend to make up words. Enjoy reading (and if you don't, that's not my problem)!
Soon, the laughter and screaming died down a bit from the Hermes cabin. All that you could hear were the echoes of the loud music in the darkness.
That morning, everyone awoke with butterflies in their stomachs in anticipation of the race. Hermione and Annabeth had become rather good friends, and as they exited the Athena cabin, Hermione was telling a funny anecdote about Ron, "And I was all like, 'Ron, why is your head in the toilet?', and then Harry was all like, 'Because Ron dropped his burger in there and wanted to get it but got stuck!'"
They both were laughing heartily when Annabeth stepped on something soft, squishy, and red. "Ron, what on earth are you doing there?" Annabeth asked. Ron was curled up in a little ball outside the Athena cabin, and had apparently been sleeping, because his eyes were red. He rubbed the big shoe print on his face from where Annabeth had stepped and mumbled,
"I was kicked out of the Dionysus cabin around 3 last night."
"Why in the name of Albus Dumbledore were you kicked out?" Hermione exclaimed in that obnoxiously mother-like voice she used on Ron and Harry.
"The thing is, well... um... Being the cabin of wine, they did happen to have some wine in there. So maybe I took a few sips, and then they were kicking me out because they said that they didn't want any liquor-heads in their cabin. So I walked out here, and I remembered that you, Hermione, were in the Athena cabin, so I tried to get in and then this obnoxious little dude came out and asked me to solve a math problem to get in. And then he started talking about pie or something, so I said that the answer was cherry pie, because that's my favorite, and then he started laughing, and I don't know why," Ron's face had a big pout on it, as he still tried to understand what the boy had meant.
Hermione and Annabeth exchanged looks of wonder because they couldn't figure out why they hung around with such a retard. Annabeth began to try to explain what pi was, but Hermione just said, "Annabeth, it's not worth it. Come on, we have to start fixing up our chariot."
The three of them headed over to where the chariots were parked. There they met the other wizards and demigods who would also be in the race. None of the other cabins were going to be in the race, just the five teams. Chiron then wheeled up and told all of them that they had to come up with team names to paint on their chariots. After much debating, the teams decided on their names. Zorra's team (which was made up of herself, Draco, Clarisse, and Luke) decided to call themselves Blonde-a-licious, due to their two hot blondies on the team. Percy's team (which consisted of himself, Grover, Harry and Tyson) decided to call themselves the Angstinators because everyone knew that Harry and Percy both had teen angst. The team that was made up of all of the Weasley and Stoll Inc. associates decided to name themselves Weasley and Stoll Inc. (how original!). Thalia's team (which was just herself and Nico) called their chariot the Emobile. And lastly, Hermione's team (which consisted of herself, Annabeth, and Ron) had a lot of trouble deciding on their name. In the end, they decided to each choose their heroes and then combine all of the names. Hermione chose Sakajawea, who she thought was very intelligent and a strong female leader and Annabeth chose Margaret Helfand, who was a female architect who broke threw several gender-related glass ceilings. Ron chose his favorite person (and probably role model too) Tinkiwinkie from Teletubies. So their name was Sakajawea, Helfand, and Tinkiwinkie. Very catchy! To help anyone who didn't understand, Chiron made a big sign with the team members on it, their position, and their chariot. It went like this:
Blonde-a-licious
Zorra (captain)
Clarisse (weaponry)
Draco (weaponry)
Luke (driver)
Angstinators
Percy (captain)
Harry (weaponry)
Grover (driver)
Tyson (weaponry)
Weasley and Stoll Inc.
Fred (captain)
George (weaponry)
Travis (weaponry)
Connor (driver)
Emobile
Thalia (captain and weaponry)
Nico (driver)
Sakajawea, Helfand, and Tinkiwinkie
Hermione (captain)
Annabeth (driver)
Ron (weaponry)
They then got an unnecessarily long amount of time to tinker with their vehicles. They used wands, paint, tools, and dashboard hula-dancers, to make the chariots perfect. The Blonde-a-licious chariot was painted hot pink with flowers and hearts on it. Draco and Luke were feeling a bit less manly when in visioning themselves in it, so they were allowed to share a tiny portion to decorate. That portion was painted black, red, and with flames and skulls. There were a lot of secret gadgets installed too.
The chariot for the Angstinators was painted green with orange flames on the sides. They spent the majority of their time installing lots of weapons on it, because when you're on a team of four male beings, all you can really think about is weaponry.
The Weasley and Stoll Inc. chariot was as odd as its owners. The colors were so vibrant, that you would have had a seizure looking at it. It resembled one of those 70s hippie vans. Installed in the back was a large stereo system; the other teams were afraid of what would be blasted out of those speakers. They also put in many secret weapons.
The Emobilewas just about the opposite of a hippie van. It was entirely red and black with skulls painted all over it. Thalia and Nico had put in some special weapons to help themselves. All over the sides there were strange sayings like, "No pain, no gain", "Some people are like slinkies... they're really good for nothing... but they bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs", and several other aggressive and dark sayings. Black and red flames were painted on the sides; their chariot was surely the creepiest of them all.
The last chariot was theSakajawea, Helfand, and Tinkiwinkie chariot. Imagine that three people with very different minds have to design something. It looked like it had come straight out of a piece of modern art by someone with multiple personality disorder. Painted on it were pictures of books and famous witches (Hermione's contribution), pictures of famous buildings (Annabeth's contribution), and pictures of female undergarments and cows (Ron's contribution).
The race was starting. The tension could be felt in the air. At the sound of the horn, the Angstinators were into an easy lead, but were temporarily held back, because Weasley and Stoll Inc. had thrown a stink bomb right into their chariot. "So immature," mumbled Thalia as she threw a real bomb into the Angstinators chariot. The chariot blew up in a huge explosion that made the nukes look like firecrackers.
"Oooh, pretty lights," Ron said. But the other teams couldn't dwell on the extraordinary beauty that everyone sees in explosions, because, although one competitor was gone, there was still a very long race ahead of them. The Emobile was in the lead with Weasley and Stoll Inc. in close second, with Sakajawea, Helfand, and Tinkiwinkie following, and Blonde-a-licious in last place.
Zorra clenched her teeth; she was determined not to lose this race in front of Draco. She might as well live up to what her name meant in Spanish. "Quick, pull up closer to Hermione's chariot!" Zorra yelled to Luke who was driving.
"You could at least say please."
"Have you ever said please?"
"No."
Soon the Blonde-a-licious chariot was pulling up closer to the Sakajawea, Helfand, and Tinkiwinkie chariot. "Fire!" Zorra yelled to Clarisse who was in charge of the weaponry.
Over on the Sakajawea, Helfand, and Tinkiwinkie chariot, Hermione had broken out into a nervous sweat. The Blonde-a-liciousteam was made up of very vengeful people. Since her team was in front of them, of course they would attack her team first. She heard Zorra's command and she closed her eyes as though expecting one of Thalia's nukes to come flying at them. She could feel Ron's presence beside her, and she felt his hand lightly touch hers. She felt a strange sensation run up her arm; was it a tingle or a wiggle, or maybe it was a combination of the two: a twiggle? Her moment of the glorious twiggling was ended abruptly when she heard one of Ron's girly screams. She turned to find that he had a tube of lipstick lodged in his eye; Annabeth stared in horror at Ron's eye; speechless for probably the first time in her life. Hermione turned to look at the Blonde-a-licious team in confusion and wonder. Was that really their weaponry? She looked into the face of her cousin who was grinning proudly and nodding, as though reading her mind. Clarisse carefully held the Blonde-a-licious team's weapon: a lipstick launcher.
The Blonde-a-licious chariot pulled ahead of the Sakajawea, Helfand, and Tinkiwinkiechariot, because in the latter's time of distraction, Annabeth had dropped the reins, and the horses were now running in senseless circles.
While the Blonde-a-licious team was lodging a tube of lipstick into Ron's eye, the two leading chariots were battling it out for victory.
"We've got to catch up to the Emobile chariot!" Travis yelled over the thundering of the horses' hooves.
"I say we use the big secret weapon. The one that no sane human can stand," George said in a very determined voice.
"Shouldn't we save it for later? We could cause some major permanent damage to everyone's sanity!" Connor exclaimed.
All three of them turned to the Weasley and Stoll Inc. team captain. Fred nodded his head slowly, "We must." Then, Fred, George, and Travis all ran to the back and slowly flicked the stereo system's switch to on.
Thalia and Nico were getting nervous. Sure, Thalia did have more nukes, but Nico had a strange feeling that the Weasley and Stoll Inc. team had something a bit craftier up their sleeves than just bombs.
Suddenly the air was pierced by some music blasting so loud that you could hear it in China. Thalia, Nico, Zorra, Draco, Luke, Clarisse, Hermione, Annabeth, and Ron could all distinctly hear a voice singing out the words:
All the leaves are brown, and the sky is grey,
I've been for a walk on a winter's day,
I'd be safe and warm if I was in L.A.,
California Dreaming on a winter's day!
Befuzled looks decorated the faces of Draco, Hermione, Ron, and many others, while a look of complete horror was sprawled across Annabeth's face. Horrible memories of her life in California were coming back to her; in California this song had been always played in every restaurant. It was like the state anthem of California, "Oh my gods! I know this song! It's California Dreaming!"
The Weasley and Stoll Inc. associates had decided to torture the other racers by forcing them to listen to California Dreaming. Truly brilliant. The effect that they had hoped for was surly taking place. Thalia and Nico's emo brains were unable to stand the groovy and happy 60s classics. Nico dropped the reins as his hands flew to his ears. Thalia was in fetal position moaning. Their chariot swerved off of the road, and into the surrounding field, which just happened to be a minefield, and their chariot blew up.
The only chariot racing teams left were Weasley and Stoll Inc. in first place, Blonde-a-licious in second, and Sakajawea, Helfand, and Tinkiwinkie in third. The final laps were quickly passing in a blur of more stink bombs, some flaming arrows and spitballs (from Sakajawea, Helfand, and Tinkiwinkie), and of course, more flying lipstick (and in case you were wondering, they never got that tube of lipstick out of Ron's eye).
In the end, Weasley and Stoll Inc. won. They made sure to rub it in with a rousing chorus from their stereo system of We Are the Champions by Queen.
After the race, all of the competitors that hadn't blown up went over to the Big House to where the injured racers were. The demigods were having ambrosia, while the wizards performed healing spells. After muttering a quick incantation, Harry turned to Percy and said, "Well, it seems like you demigods sure do have a violent idea of fun."
"I suppose that you being British and proper and everything, you wouldn't have as rowdy of games," Percy said in between swallows of ambrosia.
"Excuse me? The Brits have some of the funnest and most dangerous games around!"
"Really? Like what?"
"Quidditch for one; it's where you fly on brooms and pelt metal balls at each other, and try to throw red balls through 50 foot high hoops!"
Percy, like Harry, loved a good life-threatening game. He made Harry promise that tomorrow he would teach him how to play quidditch.
Author's Note: That was Chapter 3 (incase you can't count)! I would just like to mention that incase you didn't know, the word Emobile is a combination of the words emo and mobile. While I'm on that note, I would like to apologize to any emo people out there in case they were offended by this chapter; I really like emo people, I think that they are very nice and I don't mean to cause them any displeasure. Also, I would like to say that I am sorry to any Ron fans out there (I am one myself), because he is just so easy to be made fun of in fanfictions, and I hope that you don't get upset. I would also like to apologize (wow, this is my note of apologies) to any fans of the song California Dreamingwho were offended by my reference of it. I, myself, am a fan that song (it's on my ipod), but I just see how annoyed my family gets when I sing it in public, and that is what inspired me to use it in this context. Also, I did not copy and paste that song off of any website; it was written from my memory and with some help from a lyrics website. It was mentioned in this chapter that Zorra's name means something in Spanish. It's true, I was sitting in Spanish class and was bored so I looked up a certain word that fits her personality and I decided that that should be her name. I won't write her name meaning here (in case there are any younger readers), but if you are genuinely curious, I will have it in my profile clearly marked (you may have to scroll down a bit). Also in my profile you can find links to recordings of California Dreaming and We Are the Champions(the two songs mentioned in this chapter) in case you don't know what they sound like and want to find out. They will be clearly marked and be with Zorra's name meaning. And lastly, of course I want you to review! I love getting reviews; remember to give constructive criticism or compliments specifically on what you liked. Also, as something fun to do when you review, you can write which team you like the most or would like to be on. So review, and thanks for reading! Have a possessed day!