Chapter 3: Nobody said it was easy,

No one ever said it would be this hard

He was going to do it. Just go up to her and get it over with, it didn't make since for them to doge the truth anymore. He had to tell her, he knew he had broken her heart the last time she tried to open up to him, but this time was different, it had to be.

"Hey Pam, listen, I need to tell you something." He was nervous and it showed. Pam slowly looked up, trying not to let her imagination make the best of this situation. All she wanted him to say was that he loved her, but she couldn't think like that. It would only lead to disappointment and tears, just like most of their conversations did for her, and for him to, even though she would never know that.

"What's up Halpert?" She asked, trying to play it off as if it was no big deal. She looked at Jim and he pleaded, hoped, and prayed that this time this wouldn't end in rejection.

"Pam, I just want you to know, I'm in love."

"Well duh Jim, I've seen the way you look at Karen," The way you used to look at me, she thought to herself, Dear God how I miss that gaze.

Why is she getting so defensive? Jim questioned her in his head. I didn't do anything wrong, can't she see it's her I'm talking about?

"Damn it Pam! It's not Karen, its you, I'm still in love with you, I always have been and always will be." What's with the anger? Stupid me, I've probably scared her now, but its too late to go back. He prepared himself, told his stomach to remain level no matter what her response was.

The silence between his statement and her response seemed like forever for both of them. He wanted her to say yes, and she wanted to say yes. But something didn't feel right to her, and she had to think about it. Finally she spoke…

"What about Karen?" She practically screamed, "You haven't ended that little fling yet, have you?"

"Well jeez Pam, you just saw what happened, so I guess not."

"Why? Are you just going to wait around and hear what I say to you before you deal with her? Jim Halpert, if you really did love me the way you say you do you'd be done with her, she wouldn't be downstairs waiting for you and you wouldn't be calling her Hun."

Ouch Jim's heart seemed to say. It's not even that she's dead on the hurts, it's the fact that this is going to end the way it dose every single time I try this. It's the malice that kills, not the facts.

"Look Pam," he finally managed to compose himself enough to spit it out, he had to for her sanity, and his too although that wasn't what was important here. "I guess your right, but Pam try to understand, I don't love her, I love you, she's just a meaningless rebound."

"Well," Pam was furious, how dare he get with Karen and let her suffer while he really wanted to be with her? He caused her pain she didn't need; she'd had enough of that from Roy. "Why did you date her then? Why, wasn't I good enough for you?"

"You weren't there! God Pam! I transferred because you broke my heart, don't you get that? You broke my heart, you could've taken a chance on me, but you didn't so I took a chance on someone else. It didn't work out, but it's called a chance for a reason. Don't you see? I never loved Karen, I love you!"

"Look. I know you Jim, and I know in your mind this scene played out where I said 'why yes Jim I am madly and deeply in love with you' and I would have, if you hadn't taken 'another chance'."

"Whatever Beesley, your right this isn't what I wanted. So I'm just going to leave yet again. What the hell ever Pam, I guess I'll see you tomorrow."

And as he left they both shed a silent tear for what they'd lost.