Rei, Beyond Her Mind
Replacement is such a simple word, but it has so much meaning. Replacement is what happens when a light bulb needs to be changed or when a piece of clothing is worn out and new clothes are bought. Those are the simple things. What about the more complicated parts? What happens when a body is worn out? Bodies are not meant to be replaced.
Or perhaps they are meant to be replaced.
Even if a body can be replaced, a soul cannot be. It must be transferred from one body to the next because the soul is never replaced.
The first transfer took a long time. Or maybe a short time. When there is no body, there is no sense of time and the mind becomes confused. The in between of transfers feels like nothing and everything at the same time. Memories and thoughts drift like pieces of clouds on a windy day across a sky with both colors and sounds.
It is a good place to be. Being in between is like being in EVA, except everything is more intense and more difficult to hold on to. The world is more spread out and yet compressed at the same time. There is no feeling in the place in between, only being.
Who you are, who you were, and who you are meant to be are all together at the same time. The most recent life shines the brightest and is the easiest to hold on to. Sometimes some of the memories from one body carry over to the next.
The first transfer, all of the memories were gone. In between everything is so easy to hold on to, but being in a body makes everything heavy and the memories fall away as if they were dreams.
The second transfer was different. The time in between seemed shorter and most of the memories seemed to stay. But even though it is the same soul, it is not the same person. Things which seemed important in the last body are not as important in the next body. Each time there is a transfer, a shifting of perspective occurs.
Being transferred is like traveling down a narrowing tunnel. After drifting in a sea of thoughts for so long, it seems like the world narrows suddenly. In between transfers it feels like you have no shape or form, but suddenly there are edges to the world. Sensations return also. Things like cold and pain and hunger. When the narrowing occurs only a few memories can squeeze through the narrow opening. And the ones that are held onto most tightly are the ones which come with you. The world narrows until it seems like it can narrow no more, then it opens up again. But everything is heavy and different.
That is why piloting EVA is pleasant. It reminds you of the place in between where all of the thoughts come together. And for a short time you are whole again.