Chapter Fourteen: It's Beginning To Get To Me
We need to feel breathless with love,
And not collapse under its weight.
I'm gasping for the air to fill
My lungs with everything I've lost.
Snow Patrol - It's Beginning To Get To Me
Three weeks had passed. Rain was pounding against the roof as Lucy sat in the living room of the Cullen's house. She could practically hear the sound of Esme's pencil scraping paper in her work room. The sound of the rain hitting the pavement, a light wind hitting against the side of the house... sitting alone in the middle of the day made everything seem much more loud. She was finally able to hold down regular food; a feat which, until two days prior, had seemed impossible. A thick, meaty steak... the blood oozing off of it... the very thought of it sounded repulsive; yet she could feel her mouth watering simply thinking about the meal. No vegetables, nothing else... simply very rare meat.
Peter and Charlotte had been very nice, they stayed for a week with the family, much to Edward's dismay. She and Charlotte got along very well, and she had been sad to see her new friends go. Perhaps was had given her even more disappointment, was that with Charlotte and Peter gone, Jasper could now be a prick more openly towards her. Needless to say, it was now she who avoided him like the plague. It seemed that he took any chance available to tell her that she didn't belong there.
The sky was dark grey with clouds, it was the beginning of May; she had practically missed a month and a half of school; Carlisle did not think it wise to let her near humans. Edward had not brought Bella over for fear that the girl would attack her. It was offensive, but she understood the fear.
"You know," A velvety voice came from behind her. She didn't have to turn to know who it was. Her full lips pursed in annoyance, awaiting whatever the tall man had to say. "I'm not the only one tempted by your blood." A deep frown formed on her features as she tried to remain calm, the very sound of his voice made her want to commit murder. Her hands sat in the pockets of her large sweater, her fingers running over the edges of a small lighter with a smirk.
"Yet somehow, they're perfectly able to withstand it. Does it hurt to know that you've failed everyone?" She asked, glancing back with a perched eyebrow delicately raised, the corner of her lips turned up with a dark grin. "It must be horrid to know that you've done exactly what everyone knew you would."
"Yet you are the pathetic jezebel that lives to tempt those that you proclaim are family." He responded, standing besides her as she refused to turn from the window to look at him. She didn't need to turn to know what he looked like, his features were set in to a scowl, most definitely; he was watching her, waiting for her to break under pressure.
"I've always wondered what it would feel like to be a complete disgrace to all of humanity. Could you tell me what it's like?" She asked, looking to him with wide, hopeful eyes; acting was no hard feat, particularly when her words were laced with such venom.
"Y-" Jasper tried to begin, but couldn't when the figure of Esme stood between the two.
"Honestly! How old are the two of you? You're acting like children." Esme fumed angrily. She had taken their fighting the hardest, and guilt filled Lucy; she truly loved Esme as a mother and best friend. The thought of causing her pain did not settle well, though overriding any guilt, was her disdain with Jasper.
"He started it." Lucy folded her slender arms over her chest indignantly. She was not about to lose this battle and take the blame. It was Jasper's fault everything had happened; if he hadn't started this stupid war with her, they never would have fought, she would never have been left alone while in Port Townsend, and even if she had, she wouldn't have had to listen to Jasper ostracize her for being kidnapped.
"She-" Jasper tried to counter, though Esme let out a deep growl.
"ENOUGH!" Esme called out angrily, Lucy took a step back in slight shock at the sheer power in her tone. Esme was rarely angry, and she was now thankful for that. The woman was frightening.
"Jasper, you need to stop blaming Lucy for your moment of weakness; she was trying to help, and contrary to what you may think, we, as a family, are having no problem with her scent. We enjoy having her around." Esme said firmly to Jasper, Lucy smirked to her back, looking smugly to Jasper. "And Lucy, stop telling Jasper that he is a weak failure. He is trying."
Lucy scoffed under her breath and rolled her eyes. Months prior she would have agreed that Jasper was trying, yet now any compassion towards him was overridden by pure aggravation towards the man. It seemed like the only thing he was truly trying to do was make her feel guilty enough to leave his family.
"Can I go back to school?" Lucy asked her finally, changing the subject. Staying at the house all day was boring, and she wanted to do something.
"Go back? Are you sure?" Esme asked her cautiously. Lucy caught the smugness coming off of Jasper. He enjoyed the fact that they now worried about her attacking others. He wasn't the weak one in the family anymore, and he seemed to take a great deal of pride in that.
"I'm practically human, and Jasper attacks people much more often than I do. You guys let him out in public." Lucy said innocently, her arms folded across her chest. His eyes narrowed at her.
"LUCY! That is unnecessary." Esme hissed. "If you feel you are well enough to return to school, then we can discuss it with Carlisle when he gets home."
"Thank you, Esme! You're the best!" Lucy latched her arms around the woman tightly, she knew that if she had Esme on her side, Carlisle would certainly agree that she was well enough to return. She had, after-all, shown no real indication that she even wanted to attack a human.
The sun felt warm against her fair skin, Lucy lay back in the grass with her eyes shut. It was Sunday afternoon and the men and Rosalie would be home later that evening from their hunting trip. Alice and Esme had remained at the house, while Edward had disappeared with Bella. The inside of her ear tickled slightly with the sound of Alice's feet on the crisp spring grass. Opening an eye slowly Lucy took in the many colors radiating from her skin. While she had acted casual about it, their skin had mesmerized her every time she saw it. The first time she had seen it was while sitting in the yard with Jasper in a very similar position to where she currently lay. It seemed like such a strange memory to think about, considering the events that followed.
Carlisle had run tests on her for three days, and the sun was shining warm outside. She would return to school the following day, though he had just received an urgent call from the hospital. With excited glee she ran upstairs to a familiar cream colored door. Without thinking she threw the door open with force.
"Come on! We're going out in the sun!" She proclaimed excitedly, she had felt a strong pull towards him, yet he had always had something else to do that made it nearly impossible for her to me near him.
"Why are we going outside?" He laughed at her excitement. The voice that had told her to ignore the growing infatuation with him had disappeared; he was a strong link to her past, he was someone whom she had known before. She wanted to keep him near to her, and she didn't want to lose his friendship.
"You shouldn't dent the walls, Esme will not be happy about this." She smirked, picking up a ball that had fallen besides one of his pale blue walls, a small dent had formed where he had thrown it. With a laugh she threw it at him as hard as she could, knowing he would catch it effortlessly. "Come on!"
"Why-" He had begun, but with a grin she darted in front of him.
"Come on! Stop whining!" She proclaimed, grabbing his larger hand with her smaller fingers, trying to pull him up. She wasn't truly trying to pull him up, but she enjoyed the feeling of his hands in hers; they were soft, and cool to the touch. Yet it made her stomach do flips. He laughed at her attempts, shaking his head until he gave in and allowed her to 'pull him up', both of them laughing.
"You're too slow!" She cried out, pulling him 'quickly' through the house. She knew that he could move faster, though for some reason she was in a playful mood. She wanted to do nothing but laugh, and be carefree. Enjoy the warm sun with Jasper before returning to the real world.
"I'm too slow?" He laughed loudly as she grinned, dragging him as he slowed even further. She groaned as he made himself dead weight, his feet barely moving. He smirked at her, a glint flickering in his golden eyes. Before she could blink he had swept her in to his arms and she cried out in surprise, her eyes wide as everything blurred about her for a second. Suddenly they stood far from the house in a field behind it.
"I think that you are too slow." He told her smugly. She frowned in response, despite the fact that she knew he could feel her emotions. She loved it when they ran with her; it was exhilarating. Emmett's new game had become 'carry the human', in which he would randomly pick her up and run throughout the house at his top speed. Yet Jasper ran much more fluidly than Emmett had, it was a delicate grace that she had never quiet noticed before. Glancing to his features she took in the soft glow of his skin, the way the lights bounced off in every direction. He was much more beautiful than the others she had seen in sunlight; even as the soft scars that covered much of his skin seemed more prominent. Glancing to his eyes she saw that he was watching her curiously, his lips curled back in a smirk; he had caught her admiring him. A deep blush flooded her cheeks, and within a second she found herself standing alone in the yard. Her smell had been too much, or perhaps he was embarrassed for her. Sighing she walked through the calf length grass towards the sound of the river.
That day had been the last time she had held a truly decent conversation with Jasper. The following day she had punched Tyler for being a presumptuous jerk. She wasn't sure where all of the anger had come from, she had always been very level headed, though it seemed that the past couple of months had more than made up for a lifetime of calmness. Sitting up she couldn't help but frown at the strange glittering that came from her own skin. She would never look normal in the sun to human eyes again, she would have to protect her skin as much as the Cullens did.
"I had a vision about you and Jasper." Alice spoke softly, sitting down quietly besides the girl. Lucy frowned at the serious tone in her friends voice. "It's not very good."
"What's going to happen?" Lucy asked in a nearly inaudible whisper, biting her lip slightly. Never had she done anything to Jasper; she had been nothing but nice towards him, she had fallen for him. Twice. Each time had been quick and foolish, but it had happened none-the-less... and it seemed that every time she started to fancy him, he left, or acted like an angry six year old that hadn't gotten their way.
"You're going to get in to an argument. He wants you to leave." Alice said. Lucy felt her stomach drop in to a deep abyss. He wanted her gone; they had fought constantly, but she had hoped he would get over it, that he was only bitter that she had allowed him to bite her, that he was afraid of what would happen to her there... but he wanted her to leave. He didn't want her there.
"It's not true, Lucy. He is angry, and hurt." Alice said quickly, noticing the sullen expression that was on the taller girl's face. Her throat constricted, and she was determined not to cry at something that hadn't even happened. "He thinks it is what's best for you."
"Me leaving? How is that best? You saw what happened when I was left alone for a few hours." Lucy said quickly, her eyes were already tearing up against her greater efforts.
"You're going to run away, this evening. You can go stay with the Denali coven for a while; Jasper will get over it and realize his mistake." Alice told her, handing a small paper to her. Glancing down she saw that it was a plane ticket to Alaska. "He'll miss you, I see it. The two of you are going to end up together. I know it."
"What if I don't want to end up together? He's been a complete jerk to me, and if he's going to say something so mean that I will want to leave, why should I want to spend an eternity with him?" Lucy asked. The words were hard to form; every ounce of her body wanted to be with Jasper, it didn't want to listen to her mind that was telling in the reality of the situation. It stupidly clung to hope, as ill-placed as it was. It was the same voice that told her everything in the world disappeared when he stood near her, that his smell clouded every sense... it was a foolish infatuation, and perhaps leaving would help cure her of it. She needed to hate him as much as he apparently hated her.
"You will." Alice said with finality. "I packed your bag. Esme wants to say goodbye to you before they return; Jasper will start fighting with you in about an hour and a half."
"Thanks." The larger girl retorted dryly, glancing down to the ticket as Alice gravity of it hit her like a ton of bricks; this would be her last day here. Jasper didn't want her to stay there, for whatever reason he had, he wanted her gone. He wanted her to leave.
The last free hour of her life with the Cullens was spent with Esme and Alice, going through clothes in her room. Her small suitcase had been placed in to her car. Esme seemed attached to her in a tight embrace for most of the time, until Alice touched her arm.
"They'll be home in five minutes. Jasper can't know where she is, or that we know about this." Alice said, glancing to Lucy with remorse. She tightly hugged the girl. "Be safe, we'll miss you, but you should be able to return within 6 months or so."
"I hope so." Lucy said quietly, holding on to the two women. She didn't want to leave them; they had become her family. Over 100 years had passed without anything remotely close to this, yet after only a couple of months she was now going to leave them. She had to run away.
"The Denali coven is expecting you. Jasper will come and get you when he's ready to find you." Alice said, her voice sure. "It will take six months at most, this needs to happen for the two of you to truly work. Everything will work out. I promise."
"Okay." Lucy sighed, standing in the living room, holding Alice close. Alice and Esme forced a smile before they let go of her, disappearing throughout the house to their own business. With a frown of frustration she sat on the couch; she was alone; waiting for the time to come when she would leave.
Five minutes had passed much more like five days, sitting on the couch flipping through satellite channels quickly without much regard for what was actually showing. Though like an angel of death Jasper apeared before her, the remote laying forgotten on the couch as a show on primates played behind him. His lips moved, his smooth voice coming out, the words wicked and twisting, much like a knife in her gut. She could hear what he was saying, though the words seemed to blur in her mind, the hate in his tone making her stomach feel sick with queasiness. Unshed tears pricked at her eyes at his words. He thought that she was selfish, that everyone pitied her.
"I don't think you should come back, you make life harder for all of us." His voice cut through her senses like a sharp arrow straight to the heart, coated thick in venom to kill more swiftly.
"Fine, I won't burden your family anymore. I had no idea I was so unwelcome." She responded with such anger she was unsure of where it had come from. Leaving felt good, she couldn't stand to see his face, his haunting black eyes that made her feel like an insignificant piece of dirt. The door to the garage swung loudly before she jumped in to her car quickly, pulling away with more speed than she had ever driven before. Even if Alice had promised her that the words were not truly meant, it did not change the fact that he had said them. He wanted to hurt her. She had wanted to hurt him. They were not the same people they used to be, and living with him had turned her in to a vicious monster. She was supposed to help people, to care for others, yet she was selfish; even he thought so.
Six months passed. Snow fell outside of the window where Lucy sat, lazily watching it accumulate. It was the middle of November, and the sun had stopped rising, though they still had a few hours of daylight. Living with the women had been strange at first, though they were much better with humans than the Cullens. Of course, they were far older than her other family, though they acted much differently. Tanya and Kate, both beautiful willowy blondes, had been much more like Alice, than Esme. Within her first week there she had been given a "makeover" to fit in with them.
A rush of wind brushed across her cheeks before the sound of a door shutting met her ears. A book sat in her lap forgotten. Glancing down as she heard quiet laughter she noticed that the pages had moved during her gaze outside. The Great Gatsby. She read it when it first came out. It wasn't one of her favorites, though she had run out of books to read while pent up in the house. It was far too freezing outside to leave.
"Lucy?" The soft voice of Irina spoke, pushing open the door to her warm bedroom. Lucy slept in the only bedroom in the large house that the vampires had built. A beautiful fireplace kept the room warm, while she was forced to using candles, as the vampires had no need for lights.
"How was hunting?" Lucy smiled, setting the book down as she turned away from the window. Irina had always been away with Laurent, her mate, so they had rarely had time to talk. Her silvery blonde hair hung to her chin delicately. Lucy was jealous of her beauty, though not in a harmful way. She was by no means hideous, but being with vampires did make her feel somewhat insignificant and feeble. Jasper had been right to call her helpless, and weak.
"The Olympic Coven have broken up; Jasper attacked the human girl that Edward doted on in September." Irina said quickly, entering the room with such poise and grace of a goddess. Lucy froze, her eyes unblinking. Of course Irina had been the one to tell her; of all the family, she was the quickest to speak, even if it was not always correct. Her temper was short, and she held grudges better than anyone Lucy had ever met.
"Jasper attacked Bella?" The words didn't make sense in her mind, they sounded strangely foreign. Did that mean that Bella was a vampire? Where had Jasper gone?
"She was not bitten, though Jasper has disappeared with Esme and Carlisle. The others have all separated on their own paths. I spoke with Edward yesterday in Nova Scotia." Irina told her. Lucy could hear her disgust with Jasper; she had little faith in Jasper at this moment. They were gone; she had no idea where any of them were. Alice had promised that everything would be all right, that it would work out... yet she was stuck in Alaska, while all of them had gone their own separate ways. It had happened two months ago, yet Alice had not come to see her. Esme had not come. Even Emmett and Rosalie had not come. The family may have very well forgotten about her. Jasper had been right; they were pleased to be rid of her.
"My belongings are at the house in Forks, they left all of my things there." Lucy said with fear, suddenly realizing that all of her things were still held in the attic of the Cullen's house. They had packed up her most important things and placed them there while waiting for the men to return, though Esme had said she would do the rest of it once she was gone... yet they had undoubtedly left it all there. She was another piece of their past that they would allow to be forgotten in the dusted pages.
"I promised Eleazer that I would help him and Carmen building a garage, though I am certain that Laurent would be more than willing to take you down there. It's no more than a day trip." Irina told her with a warm smile. Lucy nodded, standing up besides the towering beauty. She had never spoken with Laurent, though Irina loved him, so he couldn't have been very horrible.
Laurent reminded Lucy of Jasper; he was 100 years older than she, and he held a sophisticated grace that even Edward had lacked. His voice had a soft french accent, and his voice was musical enough to lull her peacefully. He loved Irina very much, though he had difficulties maintaining the diet of eating animals. He tried, but felt that he was making little progress.
"You are not afraid of me." Laurent laughed as they ran through trees. The moon was high in the sky, though it barely told her of how long it had taken to get to their current location. It had been dark when they left, yet it seemed that it continued to be dark as they traveled; the moon was high in the sky, suggesting that it was the middle of the night.
"No, I have no reason to fear you." Lucy responded honestly. She did not wish to return to the Cullen's house.
"That is where you are wrong, young one." He laughed. She frowned as she felt him set her on the ground. The smell of the woods was familiar, a damp smell that was unique to the Washington rain forest. They were close to Forks.
"Why would you say that?" She asked him; there was nothing he could do to her. If he bit her, he would turn in to a human, and she wasn't sure what would happen to her, though she would either get ill for a few hours, or turn in to a vampire... then it hit her. The familiar glint in his golden eyes that she recognized from many others that had bitten her. Her heart raced as she found herself pressed against a damp tree trunk, his larger form neared her, his teeth shining in the moonlight.
"I really do feel bad for this, though I'm afraid I can't fight this any longer." The strange man before her said. He had seemed so kind, so civilized, yet the look on his face no longer held the same care. "I'll make this easy on you."
With that, she felt her entire body grow heavier, a harsh feeling over her head that throbbed before everything around her went black.
The days blended together painfully. Laurent had insisted on staying in a hotel in a strange town called Aberdeen. It was larger than Forks, though it was a logging town a little further south. With every moment that he grew closer to returning to a vampire he would bite her once more, leaving her bound against the hotel bed while he explored the town, living as a human for the first time in over two hundred years. A constant feeling of sickness and violation seemed to stick in her bones. She was no better than a common whore; an abused woman tied to a hotel bed for his pleasure and amusement.
Lucy's eyes felt heavy as she glanced around the room; she hadn't eaten in days, if not weeks. The room was dark, only a sliver of light peeking through the curtains. Her skin was cold and clammy, and her heart seemed to pump more loudly than usual, her throat constricted in discomfort. The venom was building up in her body, she could feel it. A few more bites and she would turn. She would be able to fight back, she could run away from this disgraceful place. Her wrists and ankles stung from the rubbing of ropes that had been tied tightly, the skin raw where it dug in.
The latch on the door turned quietly; Laurent was returning, though as light filled the room, she heard the sounds of more footsteps. The light was blinding to her human eyes. There were five people standing there with him. He was going to show her off, they would all bite her. Fear no longer filled her, but hope, and excitement. Their red eyes wandered over her form curiously.
"If you bite her, you will turn in to a human for a few hours, it is the strangest thing. You must try it." Laurent told a woman with fiery red hair that hung about her wildly. She must have been the leader of the coven. The others all had shining red eyes, signifying that they must have been newborns; they looked much like children trying their hardest to behave.
"The Newborns will try first. If it does not harm them, I will try it." The woman nodded. The four men jumped eagerly at their chance to attack the human. She cringed as they lept, each taking a limb as though she were some strange treat. There was no finesse to how they ate, though she had long grown numb to the painful sensation of their teeth piercing her skin.
The four men stumbled back after only a few seconds, clutching their throats as they fell to the ground. Laurent motioned for the red headed woman to wait. Lucy could feel the room spinning, her head felt hot... it was happening. She heard voices in the room, though she knew none of them were talking.
"Let's just enjoy it while we're here. Stop being sour." A woman's voice whined, it was nasal, and somewhat annoying.
"The kids need us at home." A man responded.
"We need to pick up cookies and wine before going to the party." Another man's voice said. She was hearing the voices of everyone in the hotel, at least in their vicinity, the sounds throbbing in her ears. Her eyes shut tightly, trying to block out the bright light in the room as the overhead light had now been turned on.
Suddenly another set of pointed teeth found themselves on the side of her neck, it was much more delicate than the bite of the newborns; it was the woman. She smelled of wet earth, and rotting trees. It was by no means a horrible smell, though it was quite possibly the worst thing she had smelled yet. When she left, her familiar captor returned, grinning against her flesh as he sucked out her blood. Idly she wondered how she had so much blood within her body.
Sweet, beautiful scent. The smell of pumping blood filled her senses as the room slowly stopped spinning, her thoughts stopped churning so violently. The sensation had scared her before, though now it was her liberator. This strange feeling, the speed, the need for blood... it gave her power, she was not weak, and she did not need anyone to protect her. She would kill anyone in her path that tried to fight her, she would be strong. With a wicked grin she opened her eyes, watching the dust flicker before them. The warm glow of the overhead light brought out the dingy colors of the cheap hotel room. The vampires were all eagerly exchanging words, talking of how human they were. They didn't even notice as she crushed the rope in her hands, swiftly taking the rope from her feet.
"This is-" The tall woman said, but stopped when she saw Lucy standing atop the bed, holding the long rope that had tied her feet together. "What is going on?"
"This has never happened before." Laurent said, his voice somewhat hurried, his now human heart racing quickly. She closed her eyes, taking in the scent with fervor. With a wicked grin she glanced to him, her eyes burrowing in to his now brown eyes. He was frightened of her. Gently she licked her lips, the venom pooling in her throat. Revenge would be sweet.
Footsteps. Someone was coming, and they were determined. She could hear their relaxed heartbeat as they neared.
Knocking sounded outside of the door. Nimbly she leapt to the ground, opening the door with a look of innocence. The smell of pizza made her nauseous, though the smell of the poor pimply faced boy was even better. Closing her eyes slightly she allowed herself to take in his scent. His eyes were wide as he gasped. She glanced down, realizing that she only wore her underwear, the corner of her lips turned up.
"Yes?" She asked him with curiosity. He now looked to her eyes, he was shocked, and confused, his poor human heart racing with hormones.
"D... Did someone... or-order a p-p-pizza?" He stuttered as his eyes roamed back down to her body. She was probably the first woman he had ever seen so exposed outside of swimming pools, and in the media.
"Did one of you order a pizza?" She asked curiously, a small grin as she turned back to the people standing in the room. They were frightened.
"I'm sorry, I don't think we ordered a pizza." She told him remorsefully. He gulped. A voice in the back of head remembered listening to Tanya about how she used to kill humans, seducing them away from public. Making it look like an accident. "Though I am certain my family would love some."
"Oh..." He said slowly. She walked in to the room, grabbing a robe and wrapping it around herself as she moved quickly, much more quickly than his eyes could follow.
"Here." She smoothly handed him the money she had found in Laurent's pocket. She grabbed the steaming box and set it on the table. A small voice in her mind said that it was wrong to kill this poor, innocent boy... though her thirst for his blood was much stronger. He was an unattractive geek; surely no one would miss him. The voice of the vampire inside of her outweighed any reason or sensitivity.
"Thanks." He took it before darting down the hall away from her, clearly he understood to fear her quick movements.
"I'll see you all later. Enjoy your pizza." She said with a deep grin, shutting the door behind her as she glanced around. It was the dark of night now, and no one was around. She ran speedily to the car, opening the passenger side and sitting in gingerly. She casually stretched her exposed leg on to the dash, leaning back in the cloth covered seat of his old blue sedan from the 80's at best. The paint peeled, and it reeked of the horrible pizza, and plastic. Turning back she found a small figurine, a smile on her lips as she pulled it up, trying to recognize what it was from.
Footsteps neared a minute later and she heard a gasping. Glancing up she pushed open the door with her leg, her movements were fluid, filled with a grace that she never held as a human.
"What... what... what are you..." He couldn't speak straight, his words were shaking.
"You looked like you needed a break." She said in an alluring tone. Tanya had shown her how to appear alluring, and seductive, though as a human it had been awkward at best... yet by the way his pupils dilated, and his blood pumped swiftly she knew it was working. "What do you say? We take a ride somewhere secluded, just you and me. I've been awfully lonely staying with my brother and his friends. They never let me out of the hotel room."
"I-" He began, still standing outside of the car. Her annoyance was growing, though she desperately tried to suppress the annoyance. No good would come from taking him in the parking lot of a crowded hotel; even the monster side of her knew that much.
"Please? I promise to be nice. I can show you a few things that I am certain you would love." She said sweetly, her voice dripping like honey. She could practically hear his brain fighting his hormones. Her teeth glinted in the dim light of the street light as he nervously stepped in to the driver's side. "I knew you'd say yes."
She trailed her fingers gently over his arm, tossing the pizza bag in the back seat as his hands shakily shut the door. Sitting back in the seat, she rolled her window down, she would kill him straight in the middle of town if she wasn't careful. With the fresh air of the town on the water helping to distract her, she wondered if she would be able to turn him. Soon she would return to being human, and she would be sick. She'd probably forget everything... she would be weak. Laurent would find her again, or perhaps a new vampire would... they would hurt her.
Lucy was tired of being hurt and taken advantage of; she had never thought she would yearn for the days when her biggest problem was needing to move away from everyone she knew every 15 years. She wouldn't allow herself to grow weak again, even if it meant surrounding herself with vampires that attacked her every time she started to become more human. Anything was better than what she had endured with Laurent.
Once on a dark secluded road, he stopped the car. It had taken them nearly thirty minutes, and his slow driving made her want to die.
His eyes were wide, a beautiful green that hers had once been similar to, though his were hid behind wide framed glasses. His hair was greasy looking, shaggy, and a dirty blonde color. His body was tall, and long; a gangly teenager. Gently she took off his glasses, taking in every disgusting pore on his face.
"How old are you?" She asked him smoothly, a slight smirk on her lips. She may not even be able to turn someone, though her teeth were sharp, and the venom was in her mouth. She could practically taste his blood.
"eight... eighteen." He fumbled awkwardly. His heart racing, causing that beautiful smell to entice her senses.
"I must say, I was going to kill you, but I think I'd like to save you. You'll be my little pet." She said, her cool finger trailing down his bumpy cheek. His eyes widened in fear as she knelt down to his neck, taking in the scent. The one spot that the smell of pizza did not overwhelm her. "This may hurt."
He didn't have a chance to escape as her teeth sunk in to his smooth flesh, a gasp escaping his lips as she pulled her lips back in a grin. The liquid was warm, and tasted like the best juice she'd ever tried. Reluctantly she pulled herself back when she felt his heart slow.
Throwing him on to her back as he passed out, she jumped from the car, running at her quickest speed, knowing that they needed to be away from the scene. In the middle of the woods she practically threw him on to the ground. From what she had heard about newborns, she suspected that he wouldn't wake for a couple of days; she only hoped that the venom in her system lasted long enough.
What was she doing? Her mind chastised her for her behavior; wanting to change someone, wanting to kill... this was not her. She didn't want to hurt anyone... but she was weak, and they would kill her if she lived normally; she had to fight for herself. There was no one there to protect her, so she would have to find ways to protect herself. She would live as a vampire, surround herself with people who would bite her whenever she grew close to being a human; newborns worked perfectly.
A sweet smell of perfume met her senses as she ran through the woods. A small woman, she was walking home from a bus stop. With a smile Lucy followed in the shadows, the hood of her bathrobe over her face. The woman turned down a dark alley, filling her thirst with hope.
The woman never knew what had hit her. The boys blood had tasted better, though hers had an almost bittersweet tint to it. Running to the car she pulled off the woman's clothes. A nice pair of slacks, heels, and a green blouse. Throwing it on, she tossed the woman in to the passenger side. Listening intently she tried to find a man. A hiker, anyone... they just needed to be about the same size as her pizza boy. If the flames burned high enough no one would be the wiser, even the bones would burn up and crumple under the impact of her planned accident. Finally a scent met her nose. Slowing her run she peeked from behind a tree. A hiker was sitting on a log, he looked frustrated.
"Can I help you?" Her voice was kind, and soft. The man jumped, surprised as he looked to her. Her face was masked in the shadows, though she knew he was able to detect her pale skin, and odd colored eyes.
"What... how did you get here?" He took in her strange clothes, the fact that she was not dressed in hiking gear... she looked as though she had worked in an office, rather than climbing a mountain.
"Shh. That doesn't matter." She said sweetly, listening for others. The nearest person was miles away. With a grin she stood besides him, kneeling down to reach his neck where he sat.
The flames lashed high in to the air as Lucy walked towards where her clothes sat. The smell of burning flesh and molten metal would stick with this area for months. Watching as it burned she gulped. These people were completely innocent. Before, she had only killed those that were trying to bite her... these were harmless humans. She had taken two lives; two innocent lives... and the third was waiting in limbo in the middle of the forest. She had never dealt with a newborn vampire, and had no idea how to care for one. As the sun began to rise over the trees her stomach felt heavy; she was a monster. Her fear had gotten the better of her, and she was now living like a beast; she had sought out their blood, she had not accidentally killed them. She hunted them, and it had felt nice.
Laying on the ground besides her new pet she felt remorse for her actions. Curling tightly in to a ball she wished against all that she would wake up in the morning, and find that the past eight months had been nothing but a bad dream. She would be waking up, she'd get ready for school, go to classes and sit with Sam and Amber. Matt would jokingly ask her to the spring dance, she'd laugh and tell him no. The Cullens would remain weird, but she'd never bother getting to know them. She would keep her mouth shut about the civil war, and she would move to Seattle for school with Sam as they had planned. Vampires would not be chasing her around, and she would be able to live peacefully. Yet with each passing moment she was brought closer to the realization that she would not wake up from the nightmare.
The reality was set. She would be stuck like this. She had no one to protect her, more than ever before she was forced to realize that she was utterly alone. She had to kill people, and she had to surround herself with those that would bite her. She would not be weak again, and she would not allow them to take advantage of her ever again.
It took nearly two days before she returned to being human. 42 hours, 35 minutes, and fifteen seconds, to be exact. The hikers clothes that she had stolen had a watch. True to her expectations, in the following afternoon she was awoken by the figure of her pizza boy. He stood in the woods looking confused, and enraged. He was beautiful, as any vampire was. His eyes turned black as he looked to her. She stood with a smile, confident that he would not be able to kill her.
His restraint was non existent, though he only hovered above her neck for a minute before dropping to the ground. Before he returned to human she took in his appearance. He was tall, and slender, though he no longer looked as lanky. His hair was a silky, waving blonde, and his skin smooth white.
"Change in to these." She tossed the clothes to the strange boy that sat on the ground with an air of indifference. It was exactly as she had hoped, the venom in her blood was strong enough that simply one bite was enough to change her. She would need more bites, though, to sustain it. His eyes were the familiar green, his skin smoother than before. She hadn't bothered to bring his glasses, so she hoped he wouldn't truly need them.
"Who are you? What's going on?" He asked her, his thick brows puckered. At least his self conscious nature seemed to have disappeared a bit... or rather he could form full sentences.
"My name is Lucy. You're a vampire now." She told him smoothly, smirking. "Put those clothes on. The effects of my blood will only help you so long, and we've got a long way to run."
"I'm a..." He trailed off, his eyes wide with shock. "But I feel human."
"Yes, I'm sure you do. Now get dressed. Tell me your name. Do you remember anything of your life?" She demanded, turning so that he could change. She would hear if he tried to run.
"All I remember is you being in my car, and then you bit me." He was unsure of his words, but he quickly changed. He feared what she would do to him; that was good, since he would be stronger than her. "You're a vampire?"
"It's complicated." She answered simply, turning when she could no longer hear his clothing ruffle with movement. The sleeves were a little short, and the pants a little wide... but otherwise they looked all right. Before he could say another word she scooped him in to her arms and darted through the woods. His breathing hitched, his heart racing. She should have warned him to close his eyes, or given him some sort of warning, though she hadn't thought much of it.
"What are you doing? How can you do this?" He was shocked as they ran. Trees brushed past them, though she was easily able to navigate through them safely. Being a vampire was exhilarating. She should not have feared it, she should have embraced it... perhaps if enough people bit her, she would remain as a vampire and no longer have to fear her every movement.
A muggy thunderstorm was wrecking havoc on downtown Omaha as Lucy looked through an antique store with Charlotte. Peter was currently in the woods with another couple that had escaped Maria in the south. The small dark haired woman had quickly come to dislike Lucy for her ability to kill the Newborns. The newborns followed her, biting her and then they would fight amongst one another killing themselves. Life as a vampire had steadied itself out. She had spent three months with the newborns in Texas and Mexico, though Maria made it very clear that she was not welcomed in that area. Peter and Charlotte showed up at the perfect time, though Maria had been surprised at the connection between them.
With a sigh Lucy pulled at the edge of her long sleeve sweater. She didn't feel the warmth, though she was filled with a feeling of unease. Walking through the shop she tried to block out the musty smell of old items. Gasping she stopped at a large portrait. Charlotte appeared by her side a moment later, she was nearly as surprised by the painting.
"I have to get it. It's a sign." Lucy said with determination. "I will send it to them as a gift."
"The would probably love to see you." Charlotte said as the girl who was nearly her size held the large painting effortlessly. "They live in New York now, you know."
"I don't know that that would be the best idea. I'm not quite how they would remember." Lucy shook her head with a slight laugh. A year had passed, yet everything had changed. She was not the same person that she had been before.
"You and I both know that Esme cares not for that." Charlotte laughed, her light musical laugh that was much more beautiful than her own.
"Well you girls must be about the most beautiful girls I've ever set eyes on." The elderly man behind the counter said warmly.
"Thank you, sir." Lucy nodded politely, using her charm as she placed the large painting on the counter for him. "My sister and I are just passing through town, we're in a bit of a hurry, though. So I must apologize for not having time to chat with you."
"Does it ever feel weird to think that you're probably older than them?" Lucy asked with a laugh, sliding the painting in to the back seat of their car.
"I'm not around humans enough to think about it. If I saw someone that I knew who was old, it might be different, though I've only seen them as being old." Charlotte shrugged, sitting in the driver seat while Lucy climbed in.
"I suppose not." Lucy responded softly, leaning back in to the chair. The portrait had been an impulse buy... as had the car... nearly everything in her life these days was an impulse. Something done on a whim simply because it seemed like fun, something inside told her to do it. She had never lived so uninhibited before... fighting others, living life as though there was nothing to hold her back.
"I think you should get it framed and bring it to them. Alice and Esme would both love to see you." Charlotte said after a few moments had passed. Lucy frowned, her eyes closed lightly as though to pretend that she was sleeping.
Alice... Alice had said that everything would end up alright. Six months at most. He'll come for you. She had promised... promised... and yet he never came. She spent months locked in a hotel room, held at the whims of a man bent on inflicting pain on her, taking advantage of her in every way that he could think... he lived uninhibitedly... perhaps it was a common trait of vampires, Alice certainly exhibited no restraints with her shopping addiction, and Jasper seemed to have absolutely no control over his emotions.
If not for Jasper, she would never have been put in to this horrible situation. She could now defend herself, she killed on whims; human life meant little to her. They would die anyways, she was only speeding up the process... She usually went for men; something picked up from Tanya and Kate. She would entice them, lead them to the heat of passion, their blood running rampant through their veins... and then attack. That was definitely not something old Lucy would have done. A smirk curled up on her lips at the thought of how different she would have seemed to them. She had no reason to be a prim southern belle; to follow social norms... vampires had no social norms; the only rule was to remain hidden and not allow any humans to know of their existence; she could follow that.
"I suppose I could go, I have a few things I'd like to speak with Alice about." Lucy said to the blonde woman, who shook her head with a laugh.
"You can't try to fight Alice, she'll see it coming." Charlotte reminded her. It was true, and Lucy knew it. She didn't want to fight Alice... she just wanted to yell at her as loud as possible for a vampire. The only Cullens she cared to see were Esme and Emmett. She knew that Emmett was not back at the house.
"I know. Though I should hope that for both of our sakes, she is not present when I visit." Lucy said with determination. She would return to visit with her family, as they had proclaimed to her with such devotion... her kind hearted, loving family... that had wished so well for her that they would throw her helplessly away. She would show him that Lucy Merriweather was many things, but weak and defenseless was not one of them. Jasper would learn to regret everything that he had put her through.
A/N: I apologize for this chapter going up earlier. This chapter was originally almost twice this length, but it was too long and would have had to be two... so I was going to put the Jasper chapter first, but chronologically it wouldn't have made sense, so I decided I would edit this one down to a smaller size. I don't think I cut out anything too important, and anything that I want brought up later will be given in a flashback. I hope you like it.
Let me know what you think!