I took a deep breath, another human habit that died hard. The sky over the small town of Marion, Virginia was overcast with dark clouds. It was sure to start raining soon. I watched the people walk past from behind a tree that was planted between two buildings. The alleyway I was in was mostly dark from shadows but past that was a small town full of people.
I was here for one reason. It was a test. To see if I could handle being around humans without snapping. Zander and Matt were home, with no idea of what I was doing. Two months had passed since Matt had joined us and I had finally had enough. I had to go back to Forks. I didn't intend to see Jacob. I couldn't. But I could atleast see Jasper. Maybe. If he was willing to see me. I'd just ask him how everything was and leave. Maybe... I might stay... But that would mean taking Zander and Matt with me. I knew Matt could deal with humans fine but I was unsure about Zander. I'll just go to Forks alone... and if I want to stay then I'll tell Zander.
"What are you doing?"
I jumped at the voice, surprised I didn't sense him coming. "Zander." I gasped. "What the hell?"
"You disappeared. So we followed."
"We?"
Matt stepped out from behind another tree at the edge of the forest. "Sorry. Zander made me come."
I sighed. "Ah... Fine..."
"So what are you doing?" Zander asked, leaning against the wall of the building. Matt walked over to us, obviously as curious as Zander was.
"I'm here to see if I can handle being around humans without complications."
"Uh... Why?" Zander raised an eyebrow at me.
"Because I want to go back to Forks."
"What?" Zander pushed off the wall. "Why?"
"I... I just want to see how everyone is... I won't go see Jacob. But maybe Jasper. You know, just get an update."
Matt glanced between us. He only knew a little about my life before being a vampire. "Are you sure, Jade?" Zander titled his head at me. "What if you want to stay?"
"Then I'll stay. Jasper and his family live perfectly fine there."
"And when were you going to tell us?" Matt asked.
I bit my bottom lip. "Well... I was going to go there alone... then come back."
"Nope. You're not going alone. You can't leave us." Zander wrapped his arm around my shoulders. "You're stuck with us."
"He's right." Matt said, nodding. "We'll go with you. And if you want to stay, I'm okay with it."
"See, I know you can deal with humans." I told Matt. "But I'm not sure about you, Zander. Or myself. Not yet anyway."
Zander bounced on his heels. "Well, humans are... what? About ten feet away from us and I haven't even noticed." He grinned at me. "And you seem to be doing fine as well."
"Yea, but I need to interact with them. Be really close with them and know I'll be fine. You too."
Zander nodded. "Alright. So let's do this. I have enough self control to run away if it gets too much to handle."
"Okay... Matt?"
"I'm fine."
I sighed softly and slipped out from under Zander's arm. "Let's go then." I turned and started to walk out of the alley. Zander and Matt followed closely behind me. It had started to mist lightly when we stepped out onto the sidewalk. The town reminded me of Forks. Small but well populated.
It was afternoon so people were shopping and kids were getting off of school. We were on main street which consisted of the stores and businesses. Even a school. It looked like a middle school from the kids standing around outside. The light mist didn't seem to bother the people of Marion.
We passed people as we walked down the sidewalk and the scent really didn't seem to bother me. People were giving us long glances though. I couldn't blame them. Three, good-looking, pale boys dressed all in black wasn't something you'd see everyday in a town like that. We were walking at normal human pace and the two behind me seemed to be doing fine.
But then I heard Zander squeak which caused me to stop walking. I turned around to see Zander rubbing the back of his head and Matt was picking up a soccer ball. I knew that didn't actually hurt Zander but he was pretty good at acting human.
"Sorry!" A small blonde boy around the age of eight came running over to us. "It didn't go in the direction I tried to kick it in." He stopped in front of us and grinned at us. "Sorry about that." He said to Zander.
"It's fine." Zander stopped rubbing the back of his head and smiled at the boy.
"Here." Matt handed the boy his ball back.
"Thanks!" The boy grinned at us before running back across the street to his group of friends who were watching us.
"Well, that went well." I said to them before turning around and walking again.
"I think I did very well." Zander said, catching up to walk beside me.
"You did. Pretending to be hurt." I smiled at him.
Zander smirked at me. "Hey, I remember what it's like."
"Excuse me."
I stopped in my tracks, almost bumping into the girl who spoke. Matt wasn't watching where he was going however and ran into me. I stumbled forward, like any normal human would, and did bump into the girl causing her to fall back onto her bum.
"Ah! I'm so sorry!" I knelled down in front of her. "Are you okay?"
"I'm fine." Her cheeks became slightly pink.
Using the sleeve of my hoodie to cover my hand I helped her to her feet. "I'm really sorry about that. My friend wasn't watching where he was going."
"Sorry." Matt rubbed the back of his head, grinning sheepishly.
"It's okay. No harm done." The blonde girl smiled at me while brushing off her jeans. "I wanted to ask if my little brother hurt you at all."
Zander blinked. "Oh. No, I'm fine. He just surprised me is all. He apologized."
"Oh. Good." Her blue eyes sparkled when she smiled. She looked to be about seventeen. "Um, I've never seen you three before. Are you new around here? Or visiting?"
"Visiting." I told her.
"Oh, from where?" The wind blew slightly, causing her long wavy blonde hair to move in the wind. I stiffened when her floral scent filled my senses. I fought my urges and forced a smile.
"Washington. Our grandparents live out in the mountains."
She glanced between the three of us. "You all are brothers?"
"Cousins." Zander stated leaning his elbow on my shoulder.
"Oh." She smiled. "So, you're staying in the mountains?"
"Yup. Nice and quiet."
"Oh! How rude of me." She blushed. "My name is Claire."
"Zander."
"Matt."
"And I'm Jade."
Her face turned redder when I spoke. "Nice to meet you."
"You too."
Then the clouds let loose and it started to down pour. Zander squeaked since he hated getting wet. Claire grabbed my wrist and quickly pulled me out of the rain. Zander and Matt followed behind quickly. I shook my head, shaking the rain from my head. I looked around and realized she pulled me into a small diner. The door to the diner dinged when her little brother and his friends ran inside all wet. We moved away from the door to let them pass. They ran over to a booth and sat down, chatting away.
"Um," I blinked and looked at Claire. She was blushing again. "Why don't you three join me and my friends until the rain stops?" She motioned to a booth were two other girls were sitting.
"Um..." I glanced at Zander.
Sure, why not? Better practice. You said you wanted to get close to them.
"Sure." I told her.
Claire smiled at me and pulled me over to the booth. I hadn't realized she still had a hold of my wrist. Staking her claim I supposed. The two girls already sitting down smiled up at us. "This is Sara." She motioned to the dark brown haired girl. "And this is Laura." She motioned to the dirty blonde.
The booth was big enough for all six of us, so Claire released my cloth covered wrist and sat down beside her friends. Matt slid into the booth first, followed by Zander and then me. I wasn't exactly sure why she wanted us to join her and her friends but I wasn't really complaining. Zander hated the rain so we were stuck her until the rain stopped. He could handle a little mist but it looked like it was going to rain for a while.
"You don't get out into the sun much, do you?" Claire asked me, leaning forward and resting her chin in her hand.
I blinked at her, surprised by her bluntness. "Ah, not really."
"What do you do then? For fun I mean."
"Ah... Read. A lot."
She smiled at me. "I'm a book worm too."
Wouldn't be able to tell by her tan. "What do you like to read?"
"Hm." She leaned back into the booth and crossed her arms over her chest. "Fantasy usually. I'm a sucker for a good romance."
"Me too." I glanced at Zander who was in a conversation with Sara. Matt was talking to Laura. I didn't have much social experience but it looked like a triple date or something...
"Really?" Claire smiled, showing her perfectly white teeth. "What kind of romance? I'm really into vampire romances. The whole thing is really appealing."
I just blinked at her. Ha... this is so weird...
Jade's a human magnet.
I felt Zander nudge my arm and I couldn't help the small smirk that came to my face. "Oh, really? Do you believe they really exist? Vampires?"
Claire nodded. "I do. I've always wanted to actually meet one. Or a shape shifter. They're cool too."
I tried as hard as I could not to laugh. This girl seriously wanted to meet a vampire? Was she insane? He'd probably eat her before she had a chance to realize he was a vampire. Ah wait... I'm a vampire... Haha. How funny...
"Yea, Vampires are pretty cool. I'm a werewolf fan to be honest." I shrugged nonchalantly. Zander grabbed my hand under the table. I glanced at him from the corner of my and he was looking at me too. He smiled softly and returned his attention to the girl in front of him. I tilted my head at him slightly before shifting my eyes back to Claire. She was staring at me, glancing between me and Zander.
"Werewolves?" She let her arms fall to her sides. "But they're so... scary..."
I chuckled lightly. "And vampires aren't? They drain your blood."
"Yea... but they do it all sensual."
Only if you get lucky sweetie...
I think she's trying to get lucky with you.
I felt Zander squeeze my hand. "Maybe. But wolves are so cool. Think about it." I leaned forward resting my chin in my hand. "They can transform whenever they want into a beautiful elegant creature that can rip a bear to pieces. They are the vampires' one and true enemy."
"I thought werewolves became these half human half wolf things..." She pondered.
"That's one theory I suppose... But I kno... I think that they just transform into real wolves."
"That's... an interesting idea. Better than turning into weird ugly creatures."
"Exactly."
"You think they eat humans?"
I shook my head at her. "I think they eat animals. Atleast, I hope they do." I gave her a small smile.
She returned it. "Yea. I guess werewolves could be cooler than vampires. But you can't really have a romance with a werewolf, could you?"
I beg to differ. "Why couldn't you? They're human too."
She bit her bottom lip. "But it's more appealing to be with a vampire."
I raised an eyebrow at her. Is that why Edward's so popular? "I just don't get that..."
"When you think of a werewolf you don't think about its human form. With Vampires they always have the same form. The same perfect form."
"You have a point there." Though I'm not sure about the perfect thing... Depends what vampire you run into.
You're perfect, sweetie. Perfect, sexy-
Shut up! You're messing with my attention span here...
Hehe, sorry.
"You know..." She lowered her eyes and a light blush came to her cheeks. "You kinda look like a vampire right out of a romance novel."
I blinked and Zander started laughing beside me.
OMG! This girl is so clever!
I gave him a quick glare which shut him right up. But he still had a grin on his face. Sara looked lost and was glancing between me and Claire. Matt and Laura were too caught up in their conversation to notice.
"Ah... Um..." I leaned back and ran my free hand through my slightly damp hair. "Thanks?"
Claire's face became redder and that's when I realized she found me attractive. I really didn't know what to say. She met my eyes shyly, the blush still on her cheeks. "It's your eyes that make you look like one. Are those... contacts?"
Shit... my eyes. I forgot about them. Zander's too. Matt's eyes fit in perfectly with humans but ours don't. Fuck...
"Uh..."
"It's a pigment problem." Zander told her for me. "Runs in our family. Kinda like being albino but not exactly. It's kinda hard to explain."
"Oh." She blinked. "Does it affect your vision?"
"Nope. Thank goodness or we'd be screwed." Zander told her with a grin.
I squeezed his hand in thanks and he returned the squeeze. "We were born with them."
"That's so cool!" Sara said, catching Zander's attention once again.
"Yea." Claire smiled at me.
OK, so maybe this isn't THAT bad...
"GAH! I thought we were never going to leave there!" Zander complained as he plopped down onto the couch.
I walked over to him and grabbed him, pulling him off the couch. "You're gonna get it wet."
He blinked before a smirk spread across his face. "We could get something else wet."
I rolled my eyes and pushed away from him. "I told you tying to be smooth don't work with me."
"Damn." Matt started chuckling earning Zander's attention. "Matt!" Zander suddenly attacked him. "Will you love me?"
Matt's face went into a short state of shock. "Uh, what?"
I couldn't help but start laughing. "Aw, Zander, you've embarrassed him!"
Zander grinned and licked Matt's cheek. "Come play with me."
"Ah... um..." Matt glanced between me and Zander.
I held up my hands. "Hey, do with him what you want." I turned to the fireplace and squatted down in front of it to start a new fire.
"Ah, don't worry Matt. I'm not gonna do anything." Zander said before plopping down on the floor beside me. "Whatcha doing?"
"What does it look like?" I threw a log into the fireplace.
"Making a fire~."
"Exactly."
"Are you cold?"
"No. You know why I do this."
Zander blinked. "Oh. Right." He leaned back on his palms. "You know, that girl was totally hitting on you the whole time."
I glanced at him from the corner of my eye. "I know. I think she thought I could be her personal vampire look-a-like."
"Poor girl. She didn't have a chance."
I rolled my eyes and pulled out the box of matches from beside the fireplace. "Shut up."
"I don't think it helped that she saw you two holding hands when he left." Matt said, sitting down on my other side.
Zander giggled. "Did you see the look on her face?" He started giggling more. "It was priceless!"
I struck a match and lit some old newspaper before throwing it onto the small pile of logs. "Gay and incest. Wonderful." Matt busted out laughing along with Zander. "You two are horrible."
"What? You were... the one... holding hands... with him." Matt said between laughter.
I grumbled and sat down on my bum, bringing my knees to my chest. "Yea, yea..."
"Sara started blushing when she saw us." Zander said, calming down. "Like she was turned on by what she saw or something."
I snorted. "Right. Now that's weird."
"Hey, there are girls out there that get turned on by two guys together."
"And I never want to meet those girls."
Matt chuckled. "Me neither."
I hugged my knees to my chest as the fire started to pick up. "So creepy..." I mumbled.
"I'm hungry." Zander got to his feet. "Anyone else?" Matt raised his hand. "Haha. Then come on." Matt got to his feet as well. "Jade? You coming?"
"No... You two go ahead..."
"You sure?"
"Yea. I'm fine."
"Okay..." Zander squatted down beside me and kissed my cheek. "We won't be gone long."
"Okay. I'll be right here." Zander nodded, stood back up and left with Matt behind him.
My eyes stayed on the bright fire. I scooted a little closer to it till the tips of my shoes were a few inches away from the flames. I yearned for the heat. Flaming, burning, scorching heat. I had to feel it. It wasn't Jacob but it was as close as I could get. I always wondered what it would feel like to have him hug me now. Would it burn? Like if I touch this fire... Is that how it would feel?
I reached my hand out and stuck it into a flame. A burning sensation but nothing I couldn't handle. Zander was wrong though. My skin didn't melt or even burn. After a moment, the feeling went away. Like my hand went numb. I clenched my fist in the flame but I could still feel. I removed my hand and stared at it. Nothing. It confused me. Fire was how you killed a vampire. Atleast I thought it was... Maybe it only works if the vampire is in pieces...
Zander and I passed the test today. I wrapped my arm back around my legs. We did really well... I couldn't believe that I had sat across three female humans for atleast four hours and I didn't have one urge to harm them. I never acquired a taste for human blood, so maybe it was easier for me. I didn't even know what human blood tasted like.
My gums then started to ache. Shit, don't think about it. I ran my tongue over my teeth to sooth the aching. After a few seconds it went away. I sighed and rested my chin on my knees. The dull ache in my heart had yet to go away. I was sure it would never go away. Imprinting was a permanent thing.
But I wasn't the one who imprinted...
Still, I might as well have been the one. Imprinting meant that our souls were intertwined for the rest of eternity. I think... So did that mean that Jacob was in as much pain as I was? The situation was so messed up. I didn't choose to leave him. I had to leave him. For his own safety. And everyone else's. I didn't even know the wolf that first attacked me was Jacob. I had no clue. Besides... He didn't chase after me when I ran off...
It was something neither of us could change. I was a vampire. I'd willing walk into a pack of wolves and let them rip me apart if it wasn't for Zander. He needed me. Even though he now had Matt, they both needed me. But Zander especially. I had realized that he had become very dependant on me. I wasn't complaining though. It felt nice to be needed.
The fire felt great against my cool skin. I unhooked my arms from my knees and sat Indian style. I pulled up the right sleeve of my hoodie to reveal the deep big crescent shaped scar that covered most of my forearm. I ran my fingers over the slightly darker scar, feeling the soft warmth.
It was interesting. When I was human, a vampiric scar was a few degrees cooler than my normal skin temperature. But now that I'm a vampire, those scars have no temperature difference but the wolf scars do. A few degrees warmer. The scar was a permanent reminder of Jacob. Maybe not the best reminder considering he tried to bite my arm off, but still, a reminder none the less.
Since I heard that song at the diner today, I just can't get Jacob off my mind. Well, he was usually on my mind anyway. But this time it was worse. It was making my chest ache more than normal. The song just seemed to hit home and when I completely froze to listen to it, Claire thought I was in pain. I was though... and more.
I miss the sound of your voice.
I miss the rush of your skin.
And I miss the still of the silence as you breathe out and I breathe in.
If I could walk on water.
If I could tell you what's next.
Make you believe.
Make you forget.
So come on get higher.
Loosen my lips.
Faith and desire.
And the swing of your hips.
Just to pull me down hard and drown me in love.
I miss the sound of your voice.
Loudest thing in my head...
And I ache to remember...
All the violent sweet perfect words that you said.
If I could walk on water.
If I could tell you what's next.
Make you believe.
Make you forget.
So come on get higher.
Loosen my lips.
Faith and desire.
And the swing of your hips.
Just to pull me down hard and drown me in love.
I miss the pull of your heart.
I taste the sparks on your tongue.
I see angels and devils and god when you come...
On, Hold on
Sing sha la la la
So come on get higher.
Loosen my lips.
Faith and desire.
And the swing of your hips.
Just to pull me down hard and drown me in love.
It's all wrong...
So come on...
It's so right...
Cause...
Everything works in your arms.
If I had tears to shed I was sure I would have cried right then and there. But I didn't. I couldn't. I just stared into the fire as small memories of Jacob and me flooding my mind.
Flashback
"I can NOT believe I'm doing this." I grumbled while straightening up my red tie. "Why am I doing this again?"
"Because, sweetie, you can't miss your senior prom." My mother brushed off my shoulders while standing behind me.
I stared at my reflection in the big full length mirror. I was wearing a black tux that my mother insisted I get with a white collared shirt underneath with a red vest and tie. I looked like I was in a wedding or something.
"Gah... I hate this..." I leaned forward a bit to fix my hair. It wasn't spiked in the back like usual. But I still had a fringe going across my forehead. The red streaks that I once had from long ago had washed out so my hair was just straight black. I was thinking about putting in some bright green streaks but I wasn't sure yet.
"You look great, Jade." My mother told me, smiling at me in the mirror. "Handsome." She tilted her head slightly. "Actually, you look like your father when I went to prom with him."
"Wonderful." I rolled my eyes and tried to fix my eyeliner. "Weren't you pregnant with me at your prom?"
"Six months." She grinned. "Danced so much that I went into false labor pains. I was terrified I was going to have you right there on the dance floor." She wrapped her arms around me from behind. "But you stayed put. Two months later you popped out."
"During your honeymoon."
"Yup. Your poor father. We were all the way in Mexico and he had no idea what to do." She started giggling. "You weren't due for another month and we had everything planned. The doctor, the hospital."
I blinked at her in the mirror. "Wait... I was born in Mexico? You never told me that."
"Don't worry sweetie, you're an American citizen." She patted the top of my head.
"Ah! My hair! Don't do that." I tried to fix my hair.
"I swore I gave birth to a boy."
"Shush."
She giggled but then stopped when the door bell rang. "He's here!" She grabbed the camera from my desk and ran out of the room. I sighed and gave my self one last look over in the mirror before deeming myself presentable. "Jade! Jacob's here!" My mom called up the stairs.
"Coming!" I called back. I took a deep breath before turning and leaving my room. This was so different than when I went to homecoming twice with Jacob. Then, it was more casual. But prom was so formal. I wondered what Jacob looked like as I came down the stairs.
I was almost blinded by a bright flash though and missed a step. Before I could fall, two warm, strong arms caught me. I blinked and found Jacob grinning at me as he put me back down on my feet. My mom was giggling, the camera up to her face as she took another picture. I grumbled and straightened myself up. I shook my head and rolled my shoulders. "Well that could have been bad..."
"But it wasn't." Jacob ducked his head down and kissed my cheek. As soon as he did, another flash went off.
"Ah! Mom!" I turned to her. "You are NOT sending that one to dad."
"Aw." She pouted, lowering the camera. "But it was so cute."
"Promise me."
"Alright fine. Now get together." She motioned for us to do so. "I want a pretty prom picture." Before I could say anything, Jacob wrapped an arm around my waist and pulled me to him. "Smile!" Automatically I did as told and the flash went off. "Perfect!"
After a couple hundred more pictures my mom was finally pushing us out of the house. "Go. Go. Or you'll be late."
"Ok, Ok."
"Stay out as late as you want!" She waved to us as we made our way to my car.
"Alright." I waved back at her and sighed when she finally went back into the house. "Jeez that woman is insane."
"But she is your mother."
"Yea, Yea..."
"Jade, wait."
I stopped walking and turned back to Jacob. Finally, I got to really see what he looked like. He was dressed in a tux, just like me. Albeit he looked so much sexier than me. His tie was dark blue and loosened a bit. He never did like to wear things too tight. God, he looked gorgeous. "What?"
"I didn't get to properly greet you." He smirked softly and moved closer to me. Out of instinct, I backed up right into my car. Jacob chuckled softly and placed his hands on my hips. "You look amazing." He pressed his body to mine and leaned down, kissing my lips softly.
My heart sped up and I could feel the heat come to my cheeks. "T-Thank you. You look great too."
He slipped his arms around my waist and hugged me to his chest. He leaned his head down to my neck and kissed it softly. "Really Jade... You look... I can't even find a word to describe it..."
His hot breath tickled my ear and I felt a small heat start to pool in the pit of my stomach. "Jacob..."
He leaned his head back so we could meet eye to eye. The grin on his face made me want to melt into a big pile of goo. "I don't know if I can go through the night without jumping you."
I swallowed hard. "Well, you'll just have to." I patted his shoulder.
Swiftly, he leaned down and caught my lips with his. I didn't fight him. I never could. My eyes closed shut and my arms slipped around his neck, pulling him closer. A light growl escaped his throat as he pressed his lips harder against mine. Jacob was serious. Very serious. He pressed me harder against the car and he ran his tongue across the seam of my lips. I parted them and he took no time in slipping his tongue into my mouth. I whimpered softly, burying my hand into his shaggy hair.
After a moment, we pulled apart for air. I panted lightly, causing small puffs to appear in the cool air. Jacob licked his lips, still grinning. I swallowed hard and tried to regain control of my body.
"Ah... Um... Prom... We'll be late."
Jacob pouted. "You really want to go?"
"Of course not. I'd rather continue what you started. But I didn't get dressed up for nothing. Someone other than you and my mother is going to see me like this."
Jacob sighed. "Fine." The smirk returned. "But afterward, you're mine."
"Fine."
Little did I know that that would be the first night Jacob and I slept together. Well, we always slept together. But I meant... Sexually. It was an experience I would never forget. And something that was repeated a lot. Jacob had a high sex drive. He blamed it on his animal instincts but I wasn't convinced. Nor was I complaining actually.
The moon in the star scattered sky shone brightly, lighting everything it touched. I hummed softly to myself, comfortable sitting between Jacob's legs with my back pressed to his bare chest. His head was resting a top mine, watching me as I continued to draw the moss covered tree trunk in front of us.
"Jacob?"
"Hm?" He shifted his arms around my waist to hold me tighter.
"I've been wondering something lately."
"What?"
I stopped in my drawing and stared at his arms around me. "What would you have done... If Jasper was too late and couldn't suck the venom out?"
Jacob was quiet for a few minutes. He sighed softly and tightened his arms around me. "I'm... not sure really... what I'd do if you became a vampire."
I grabbed his hand and linked his fingers with mine. "Would you hate me?"
"Of course not." He leaned his head down and kissed my cheek. "I'll always love you, Jade. No matter what."
"Good. But what if... he killed me instead?"
Jacob squeezed my hand. "Then I wouldn't be far behind you."
I blinked. "No."
"What?"
"No. If something like that ever happens. Don't."
"Jade, I can't live without you. And no, that's not some sappy cliché thing. I literally can't." He nuzzled his nose into my neck. "It's impossible. It's a wolf thing. I'd never move on and would eventually become an empty soulless being. Once we imprint, we imprint for life."
My heart sped up at his words. "So... what if I just so happen to accidentally die before you do."
"I won't let that happen." His words were firm. Like he was promising me that.
"Ok... But what if, say when we get really old, I die before you of old age? You can't prevent that Jacob."
"I know. Then I'd die soon after you. And not by my own hand. I'll live as long as you do."
I blinked. "Really? Well that's convenient."
Jacob chuckled, causing his chest to rumble against my back. "Yes, it can be."
I blinked at the dying fire. I rubbed my eyes, thankful I didn't have tears. I leaned forward and threw another log on the fire. I sat back, pulling my knees to my chest and hugging them. I forgot about that effect of imprinting. Does that mean... that since my lifespan has become infinite... that Jacob's has as well? My eyes widened at the thought.
"Holy shit... If that's the case... Then Jacob will live as long as me. No matter what. Whether we're together or not." I whispered into the cool air.
I shook my head. No... I'm probably wrong...
I nodded and swallowed the lump in my throat. Jacob was wrong though. I wasn't pure... but I wasn't going to argue with him. He took it better than I expected. Of course, I was expecting the worse. Though now, I felt stupid. Jacob was never going to get angry at me for what happened. He wasn't like that. I suddenly felt undeserving. But no way in hell was I going to let him get away.
Carefully, I pulled out of his arms and turned to face him. I moved forward and straddled his lap. He stared at me confused as I wrapped both arms around his neck, wincing at the slight pain in my right wrist.
"Jade?" Jacob tilted his head up at me, his warm brown eyes searching mine as I leaned my head closer to his. Atleast in his lap we met eye to eye.
I took a deep breath before pressing my lips to his. He was still only a second before responding. He wrapped his arms around my waist and pressed his lips back to mine. I felt it then. That fire from my dream but this time, it wasn't painful. It was pleasurable. A burning sensation streaming through my veins and making my body burn. I whimpered very softly and slid my eyes shut, pressing my body to his.
I buried my hand in Jacob's shaggy black hair and pulled him closer. His lips pressed gently against mine as he slipped his hands to my hips and let them rest there. Our lips moved together gently, just feeling the other. A sweet gentle kiss. Our first kiss. I kinda felt giddy.
After a few moments, we pulled our lips apart for air. I rested my forehead against his and smiled at him. He returned the smile, blissfully, and brought up one hand to cup my cheek.
"You're so cute when you blush."
I blinked, leaning back a bit before sticking my tongue out at him. His eyes landed on the silver bolt through my tongue and before I could stop him, he leaned forward and licked it. I squeaked and pulled my tongue back into my mouth.
Jacob just smirked at me, his earlier anger vanished. "I've always wanted to do that." He said while sliding his hand back to my hip.
I knew my face had to be even redder. "I'd like to do it again."
He cocked an eyebrow, his smirk not leaving his lips. "I'm not stopping you."
I grinned and leaned forward, our lips connecting again. It just felt right. Like that was how it was supposed to be. Jacob and I... He imprinted on me for a reason and I was starting to realize why. We were meant to be. I could feel it in my soul.
I let out a soft moan when his warm tongue moved along the seam of my lips. I parted them and he wasted no time in sliding his tongue inside. I tightened my grip on his hair as his tongue moved against mine. I had never felt such a thing. I had never done such a thing. Jacob was teaching me so much that I had never done before. I was sure he still had a lot more to teach me. I followed his tongue back into his mouth and he let out a soft moan as I played with his tongue. I felt a surge of pride that I could make him moan like that.
We broke for air, panting a bit. Our eyes locked and he smiled at me. "I... Don't think you realize exactly what you do to me..." He spoke softly.
I shifted in his lap and realized exactly what he was talking about. I felt my face burn and pressed my hand to his chest. His skin was hotter than normal. I moved my hand over his heart and felt it beating fast, in sync with mine. "Jacob..." I smiled softly while staring at my hand over his heart.
"It's yours, you know." I blinked and raised my eyes to his. "My heart." The sincerity in his voice almost made tears come to my eyes. Jacob smiled softly at me and pecked my lips softly. "It'll always be yours." He nuzzled my nose with his. "I love you, Jade."
My heart clenched tightly at his words and tears sprung to my eyes. I had a feeling he did love me but to actually hear it... It was different than I thought. "I think..." I took a deep breath. "I love you too..." As soon as I said it, I knew it was true. Strange how things worked like that.
End of flashbacks
I rolled my tongue around, the metal bolt through my tongue clinking against my teeth. I felt warm. But not from the fire. I felt warm inside. The memory caused a sharper ache in my chest. I gasped in surprise at the pain and clutched a hand to my chest.
"Fuck..." I leaned forward in pain, closing my eyes tightly.
"Jade!" Zander's voice called to me as someone grabbed my shoulders. "Jade. What's wrong? What happened?"
I hissed, the pain subsiding and pushed away from Zander. "I'm fine." I sat up straight, taking a deep breath.
Zander's red eyes searched mine, worriedly. "Jade..."
"It was just a sharp pain in my chest... I should be used to them by now..."
"Oh..." Zander leaned forward, wrapping his arms around me. "I'm sorry..."
"Don't be." I rested my head against his shoulder.
"I guess this means we're leaving for Forks A.S.A.P." Zander and I pulled apart to look at Matt who was lounging on the couch. "Or else that pain is going to get worse and possibly, eventually kill you."
I blinked at him. "What?"
He blinked back at me. "Oh... Um." He rubbed the back of his head, ruffling his auburn hair. "It's just a theory I have."
I raised an eyebrow at him. "Theory?"
"About this imprinting thing. Jacob imprinted on you, right?" I nodded, turning around to face him. "Well, it seems to me that imprinting is having two peoples souls intertwine for all of eternity." Exactly what I thought... "But what if that link, that connection between the two is broken and they are separated? Wouldn't the heart ache because of it? Yours does." I placed my hand over my heart, staring at it. "Then my guess is that Jacob's heart is aching as much as yours. No matter what you have become, his soul is still connected with yours."
"Do vampires even have souls?" Zander wondered as he sat down beside me.
"I'm hoping we do..." Matt said, moving to sit on the floor with us. "And if we do, then Jacob is in as much pain as Jade." He sat down in front of me.
"OK... that makes sense..." I said, raising my eyes to Matt.
"Well, I think that the longer the two of you are apart the more your heart will ache. The more painful it will become because the two of you know you can not be together."
"It's not that we can't..." I interrupted him. "It's... Well, I don't know really. I don't know if he could handle me being a vampire. Or if I could deal with him being a wolf."
"Jade, you did well with those wolves we ran into a while ago." Zander told me.
"Yea... but that's different. I didn't have to touch them. Or deal with them. With Jacob... We'd be more... intimate than that."
"So, you see no point in trying?" Matt asked me getting a nod in return. "That makes sense. You're trying to protect both of you. But in the end it's just going to destroy both of you. You'll die without each other."
"Does that mean..." Zander trailed off, biting his lower lip. I glanced at him from the corner of my eyes. "Well... If you're theory is true Matt... Then... does that mean... that Jade won't ever love anyone other than Jacob?"
I glanced at Matt for his answer. "Yes."
"Jacob..." They both looked at me. "He once told me... That.. It was physically impossible for him to live without me... We were talking about if I died but still. Same basic principal. He said it had something to do with the imprinting... That he wouldn't be able to move on... and he'd die." I spoke softly with my eyes locked on the wooden floor.
"Then, the same thing would apply to you."
"I can't die from heartbreak. I don't have a heart."
"It's the pain that could kill you. You'll be in so much pain that you won't care anymore. And you'll end your own life."
"Vampires can't commit suicide." Zander said.
"They can if they purposely get into a fight with another vampire and loose. Or throw themselves into a fight with a bunch of werewolves. A vampire can't commit suicide on their own, but they can do it."
"Great. Go give him ideas Matt." Zander growled.
"Sorry..."
"But, what if he's right?" I said, lifting my head. "I wonder how long it would take for me to get to that point..."
"I won't let you get to that point." Zander wrapped his arms around me.
"Zander..."
"Love is what you need right? Well, I can give that to you." He buried his head in my neck.
"I don't... think it works like that..." Matt said, chewing on his bottom lip.
"Well, we can try." Zander mumbled.
"Zander..." He lifted his head and met my eyes. "I know... I said maybe when I finally move on from Jacob... but..." I suddenly felt like I was going to cry again. "But... I don't think that's going to happen... I can't..."
"Shh." Zander hugged me tightly, burying his head in my neck. "I don't care. You don't have to love me back. Just don't leave me." He begged me softly.
I swallowed hard and wrapped my arms around him. "I won't. I promised, remember?" He nodded a bit.
"Don't forget about me." Matt moved toward us and wrapped his arms around us both. "You have me too, you know."
Zander pulled back from me and wrapped an arm around Matt. A group hug. "Right. The three of us. Together forever." Matt and I nodded in agreement. We were going to do this. We were going to go back to Forks. Together. I was... going home.
I'm staring out into the night trying to hide the pain.
I'm going to the place where love and feeling good don't ever cost a thing.
And the pain you feel is a different kinda pain.
I'm going home to the place where I belong.
Where your love has always been enough for me.
Not running from...
No I think you got me all wrong.
Don't regret this life chose for me.
But those places and these faces are getting old.
So I'm going home.
The miles are getting longer it seems...
The closer I get to you.
Not always been the best man.
A friend for you.
But your love remains true.
And I don't know why.
You always seem to give me another try...
I'm going home to the place where I belong.
Where your love has always been enough for me.
Not running from...
No I think you got me all wrong.
Don't regret this life chose for me.
But those places and these faces are getting old.
So I'm going home.
Be careful what you wish for because you just might get it all. And them some you don't want.
I'm going home.