DEALINGS
November 28th 2003
Dear Diary:
Damn it, some idiot called Raye Penber decided to follow me around and shit all over my happiness…and fucking Ryuk decided to wait, for the brief period of a couple of months, to let me know that someone had been following me around at school, watching over me after gym class, and most likely observing me sleep. For all Ryuk knew, this man could have been a rapist or something. Imagine what would have happened to the world if it's new God was killed, or worse, ravished? I wonder if the death note works on shinigami.
Anyways, because Raye annoys me, I have decided to get back at him and kill him before he informs the FBI of his suspicions. My brilliant plan came to me in a dream where Ryuk and I were riding an "apple-bus" down shinigami lane and a jerk with no sense of fashion and a gun decided to get in the bus to come with us to apple shinigami world.
So then it came to me. All I had to do was to find a hobo criminal (with no sense of fashion) to follow me around, along with some chic (because chicks make me look heroic) to be my date, and then I'd make sure Raye followed me around so that we'd all get in the bus, then the hobo would die because I had written so in my notebook, but not before threatening everyone in there, acting nuts, and then that would allow me to be heroic which would prompt Raye to be all heroic. All I'd have to do was pretend to doubt him thus making him show me his ID, in order to gain my trust, which would give me access to his name, unknowingly, allowing me to kill him as he went all batman on the criminal. Then all that would be left for me to do was to make the criminal see Ryuk which would make him go ballistic and die by running out of the bus in a frenzy, getting run over as It was written in my death note. Ehehehe.
And so I did all the crap I wrote in the previous paragraph. Just as I had predicted, Raye gave me his name, signing his death warrant. It's a shame he dresses so well, the day I kill him, the fashion world will mourn.
December 11th 2003
Dear Diary:
Everything is going just as planned…I have, hacked several times into my dad's computer and taken private information that has not been shared with the public. This will cause L to suspect the police and this will in turn cause the police to resent L, therefore generating a catfight of epic proportions.
On a different note, I wonder how L looks in real life…most likely he's an oldfag, with no life. He probably has a pickle up his ass too, feels too important to give people other than himself a few minutes of his precious time and has reached his position of power by being a dick and destroying the lives of other innocent people.
I hate people like that.