DISCLAIMER: The setting and characters belong to CBS, a production company or two, and pretty much anyone who isn't me; I do this for fun and not profit and I only really own Sam and Ellie. Well, that and a new addiction to 'Moonlight'. ;O)
'Thoughts'
"Speech"
Summary: Josef thinks he's got it all under control, but has he? Mick's just trying to stop them from killing each other, and Sam is about to undergo the afternoon from hell.
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COMPLICATIONS
Chapter Six – Doomed
Mick rapped loudly on the door, and then he banged on it…..three times. Sam opened it, arching an eyebrow at him as she did so "fire is there?"
Mick gave her his patented 'not funny' look and scanned the room. Sam pointed to the table "there's been no blood split; he's there and I haven't even nicked him…..yet."
Josef smiled thinly and put up his hands "and I haven't even so much as licked her neck…yet."
Sam glowered "licked my neck?"
"As opposed to biting it" Josef smiled innocently.
"Oh right, and that's better how, exactly?" She continued to glare whilst he grinned, but said nothing.
Mick saw Ellie standing at her bedroom door and went in to her. "Hey short stuff, were they fighting?"
The little girl shook her head "nope, I couldn't hear raised voices; but I could tell from the tone they were winding each other up."
Mick nodded "they do that all the time; it's quite funny really."
Ellie stared at him "will they hurt each other?" She sighed "I worry, auntie Sam has a terrible temper you know, and Mr Konstantin is her boss Mick."
Mick nodded "I did suspect she had a temper – but no, they won't murder each other Ellie; I wouldn't let them" He crossed his fingers behind his back; he was a vampire after all, not a miracle worker.
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Outside Josef felt another stab of jealousy as he heard Ellie chuckling with Mick; the guy definitely had a natural ability with kids. In a way Josef felt sorry for his friend, he would've made a good dad.
He, on the other hand, felt a bit awkward around children; he'd lived so long he felt ancient compared to those who'd only been on the earth for what was little more than a blink of the eye to him.
It was alright for Mick, he was still within an ordinary lifespan; Josef wondered if his friend would still be so natural when he'd lived the centuries he had.
He felt eyes burning into his head; glancing across he saw Sam staring at him with an odd look on her face, but the next moment it was gone. "What? What are you looking at?"
She shrugged, her voice mild as she replied "I don't know, hasn't got a label – but don't let that stop you giving your whiney arsed opinion on everything." She smiled brightly at him, Mick flinched as he re-entered the room and Josef….laughed.
Sam and Mick exchanged a look; Mick sighed "you broke him, I knew you would eventually."
Sam looked outraged "I broke him – how in the hell did I break him? He's your friend, you must've done it."
"How may I ask? I haven't even beenhere for the last ten minutes and he was fine when I left!" Mick glowered, but there was a hint of amusement in his eyes.
"It's all your angst" Sam waved a hand at him, trying to keep a straight face "it's catching. Look, even Dopey's depressed!" She gestured to the spaniel giving them all her patented 'puppy dog eyes' in Ellie's doorway.
"N-o; that damn mutt always looks like that!" Mick protested "Anyway even if it was angst, mine or the dog's, surely he'd be crying?!"
Josef's laughter had become quite loud; his head twisted between the two – Sam was openly staring at him now "I don't know what your problem is Josef, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce."
He sat back, rocking on the legs of the chair – his eyes caught Mick's "when was the last time we could laugh with someone after they'd found out what we were?"
Mick shook his head "I don't think we ever have."
"Exactly." Josef grinned.
"Your point is – assuming all this actually hasa point and you're not just away with the fairies?" Sam arched an eyebrow at him, and then slapped her forehead "you got at the cooking sherry when I went to the bathroom didn't you? Jeez I was only gone five minutes!"
Josef moved with the speed common to his species; something that Sam had long forgotten about. Two years was a long time to forget all the little nuances and foibles that went with being related to vampires, to having a whole new world engulf you.
He hugged her to him tightly "don't ever change Sam – seriously" all laughter was wiped from his face then as he held her back to look at her; his eyes held a sadness that caught and held her "don't." he saw her stunned look before regaining his control "I'd hate to have to train yet another PA."
Sam slapped at him and retreated to the kitchen; she knew there'd been something there – twice - a look, not just of jealousy (though she had no idea why he'd be jealous of Mick) but also of longing.
Gathering her wits she turned a bland face to the two vampires at the table "are you on drugs?"
"We're vampires, we don't need narcotics" Josef muttered, hating the way he'd let his guard down, but grateful that she'd appeared to decide against making any real comments about it. Though he had to admit this consideration seemed an…..alien concept where Sam was concerned.
"Oh of course, you get a natural high out of what – living?"
Josef chuckled "you can be such a bitch, you know that right?" His relief that she'd let it go shone out at her, and she smiled.
"I'll have you know I wasn't born a bitch; men like you made me that way." She wagged a finger in his direction.
"I will remind you, again, that we are not men." Josef sounded long suffering.
"You're not? What are you then, broccoli spears? Because, seriously, the last time I checked, if it whined like a man, sulked like a man and acted a total idiot like a man – then, by God, it was a man. You two being vampires as well, only makes all that crap worse!"
Before Josef could reply, her doorbell rang; he arched his eyebrows "you have a bell?"
Sam gave him a surprise look "I..know! Wondrous isn't it?" Both vampires rolled their eyes "you never noticed as you two don't deem it necessary to use it; not when hammering on the offending impediment to your access, like it's the end of the world and I have to know, works so much better at getting my attention – and the attention of all my neighbours."
She went and answered it, to be followed into the apartment by one of the women the two men recollected had been there the previous Friday night.
"Dana – you won't remember me, I wasn't drunk and neither was I any of those who were calling you 'hottie stud muffins'." The woman grinned.
"Oh don't encourage them for the love of God!" Sam retorted "they've got big enough heads already – especially him" she gestured to Josef. Turning to her friend she smiled "how was Louise on Sunday night? Bella rang me to say an emergency PTFA meeting had been called after one of the teachers had been arrested for DUI."
Dana giggled "she was so hungover I swear she was green! When I agreed with what you'd said about how she'd behaved here" she nodded her head at Mick and Josef "she went an even darker shade of green – if that was possible – before mumbling "oh.my.God! If I wasn't already dead, Sam would kill me!"
Sam roared with laughter "that's why I didn't go mad Sunday morning; I knew she didn't believe me and so I decided to let it go. I figured as soon as Little Miss Prim started to sober up properly she'd remember – fear is a great soberer so I'm told!"
Dana laughed with her "she says she's going to be on the wagon from now on; apparently, Max went postal when he saw the state of her – he said….."
Just then the bell went again "it's like Grand Central bloody Station in here today" Sam grumbled as she went to answer it. She quickly returned looking more pale than usual, followed by an older man "Dana, you remember…….Fred, don't you?"
She wouldn't look at Josef or Mick; she could feel their instant mistrust radiating off them from where she stood. Fred picked up on it too; giving the two younger men in the room a cold, but slightly quizzical, look.
'Oh great; this is just totally bloody, sodding brilliant!' Sam thought 'I have three vampires squaring up for Lord knows what in my tiny apartment, with my best friend and sick niece hovering around as well, neither of whom are aware these three are more than a myth.' She closed her eyes for a moment 'what else could possiblygo wrong?'
However it seemed that Fate and even Sod's Law were against her as the bell rang again. Sam stared in disbelief, merely wondering if it was the rest of her motley crew of friends intent on securing sexual favours from Mick and Josef; she even went so far as to eye up the latter vampire in case this was some sick joke of his.
However, he seemed to be keener on staring down Frederick – in the end, when it seemed no one else would, Mick answered the door.
"Oh hello" a female, very English voice, could be heard replying to his request if he could help them "is Samantha in?"
A couple who looked to be in their mid sixties followed Mick into the, increasingly crowded, apartment.
"Samanthadarling!" the woman cried gleefully; in a voice that you might expect from a woman who'd just found Doctor Livingstone after years of searching"there you are! Goodness you dolook pale – still avoiding the sun like it's the plague I see."
The man with her clapped a hand so hard on Sam's back she stumbled slightly "pale and interesting – might as well have been avampire, eh sweet?" he bellowed jovially, a slight Irish twang to his voice, so that all there flinched.
Sam could only stare in mounting horror; words would not come immediately – she wondered, distractedly, if you really coulddig a hole and bury yourself? If you could, she was about to play hunt the shovel.
Finally she managed to force out, in a voice of impending doom "mum, dad…...this is……this is……oh bloody hellfire."