August 12th, 2008
"Dammit," I muttered, taking a Q-tip and wiping away the smear of mascara. I willed myself to calm down, at least enough so my hands would stop shaking. I watched a smile spread across my face as I looked at myself in the mirror.
Just then the door burst open and Hadley hurtled through, followed closely by Jane. They fell into a giggling heap on the floor at the foot of my bed, pushing on each other until they were both standing again.
Still looking at myself in the mirror, I spun around slowly, admiring the light flow of my dress and the way it floated around my legs. "Get out, I'm trying to get ready," I said, frustrated.
"Wow, Tor, you look beautiful!" Jane exclaimed, stopping in the doorway.
"You think so?" I asked softly, suddenly unsure.
Hadley nodded, taking my hand and leading me down the hall. I was unsure of where she was taking me until I saw my parents' open door at the end of the hall.
"Mommy, look at Tory!" Hadley exclaimed, pulling me inside.
"Wow, sweetie!" Mom said, standing up and spinning me around. I laughed, planting my feet so I stopped. "You look beautiful," she whispered, wrapping her arms around me.
"What's the special occasion?" Dad asked, walking out of the bathroom in a cloud of steam, a clump of tissue stuck to the side of his face.
"Her three month anniversary with Julian, Tom," Mom said, plucking the tissue off his face, and touching the spot gently. Dad flinched, gently pulling her hand away.
"Well okay, have fun. Be home by curfew." He moved to the closet, leaving Mom and I alone.
"Mom, come on, an extra hour?" I begged softly.
"Tory, I don't-"
"Mom, please, it's our three month," I interrupted, giving her my puppy dog eyes.
"Fine Tory. Midnight. Just don't do anything stupid, okay?" she warned me, stepping forward and hugging me again.
"I won't Mom, promise. I love you," I told her, stepping out of her embrace.
"Julian," I murmured against his lips. He shushed me, sliding his hand up my thigh. I allowed it, losing myself with him for a moment. We shifted and Julian hit the horn of his car, the noise breaking through the silence of the night. Laughing hysterically, we shifted again, so I was on Julian's lap in the passenger seat. When he started tugging at the waistband of my underwear, I pushed away from him, leaning against the dashboard.
"What's wrong," he asked softly, his eyes heavy lidded. His hand was still on my waist underneath my dress, and though it took all the willpower I had, I pulled it away, tangling our fingers together on my lap.
"Curfew," I said quietly. He wrinkled his nose but nodded, kissing me one last time before moving as gracefully as he could into his own seat. I laughed as his elbow hit the horn again, his knee bumping the gearshift.
"Shut up," he said, laughing.
As we pulled away, he moved his hand to my knee in a way that had become so familiar in the past three months that I smiled to myself, placing my hand over his. I glanced at the clock and groaned silently. It was already after midnight, and I had no idea how long it would take us to get back to my house from the abandoned street we had parked on.
We had just pulled into my neighborhood when we heard the sirens.
"Oh man, that sucks," Julian said quietly. "Can you imagine?"
"No…those poor people," I replied, squeezing his fingers. Whenever I heard sirens I always sent a silent prayer up for whoever needed it, before silently thanking the world for it not being me.
And then we rounded the corner and saw the lights. There was smoke billowing out of a house down the street, almost blocking our view of all the trucks. Julian quickly rolled his window up, in an attempt to keep the smell out.
"Holy shit, it's my neighbors!" I exclaimed, suddenly worried for them. I had always liked the Dutzs. "Stop here!"
Julian pulled off to the side, a good four houses down from where it looked like the fire was coming. My house was just on the other side of all the smoke, and I wondered what my family was doing. And then, as Julian and I took our first steps forward to join the crowd now gathered on the other side of the street, I saw through the smoke.
"Oh my God," I breathed before breaking into a run.
"Tory! Tory wait! Tory!" Julian called behind me, his voice getting farther and farther away.
"Mom! Mom!" I screamed, willing myself to run faster. I barely saw the neighbors turn towards me, Mrs. Dutz moving forward to stop me. "Dad! Mom!"
Two firefighters glanced over then, and saw me about to dart into the house. They moved forward quickly, motioning Mrs. Dutz back as the smaller one gripped my arms.
"Is this your house?" he asked urgently, shouting to be heard over the noise of the fire. I writhed in his grasp, trying to get away, to get into the house.
"Ma'am, ma'am please! Is this your house?" he asked again, and I saw the larger of the two motion Mrs. Dutz up again to comfort me.
"Yes," she told them, her voice steady though her hands shook as she put them around me. "This is Tory. It's her house."
"Where's my mom?" I asked, whirling around and shouting desperately in her face. "Where's my dad? My sisters?"
Mrs. Dutz shook her head, dropping her eyes. "Honey, I don't know. They are still inside. The firefighters are trying to reach them."
Just then there was a loud snapping sound, followed by a large crash.
"There goes the roof," I heard a firefighter say quietly, before he began shouting out instructions.
"No!" I screamed, spinning back around and sprinting towards my home. Before I had taken three steps a firefighter had caught me and put his arms around me, holding me back.
"No! No! Mom!" I screamed, choking on my sobs, trying to break away and get into the house. I knew I could save them all, if I could just get in there. "Mom! No!" There was another crash, and I saw the rest of the roof cave in. "No!" I screamed, and the sound filled my ears until everything went black.