Finale Fix

BONUS PROMPT: Surprise (Buffy)

CHAPTER NINE

Trying for Even

Matthew wasn't sure what he expected Emily's response to be. It could have been a whole number of things, running from happiness, to anger, to disbelief. He felt like an outsider, knew the way Emily looked at her Unit Chief was more than just friendly courtesy. She'd been worried, panicked even, as evidenced by her tears not ten minutes ago. But either the information was lost on the man who couldn't get up from the couch for fear of aggravating injuries that could have killed him, or he simply didn't know how to respond.

"What are you doing here?" Emily asked.

Matthew needed to get out of there. He needed to get Cami out of there. They were both buffers for Emily, both people she could deflect her emotions on and that was the last thing he wanted. Whatever was between Emily and this Hotch, they needed to figure it out on their own. Without the help of him or Cami.

"Em, Cami and I'll eat out. I promise to bring her back all safe and sound," Matthew said, not caring if Emily heard him or not, ushering Cami towards the door.

"I'll call if I'm not going to be home, okay, Mom? I'll see you later."

--

Emily had barely registered the fact that Matthew and Cami had left. Almost every molecule in her body was focused on the man in front of her, the man dressed in sweats and an old t-shirt that looked like it had seen better days. She could see the bandage of his wound beneath the cloth and found herself shivering. He'd been moments from death. Seconds even. She still couldn't process it.

She watched him, using every technique of reading body language she knew and had honed. He seemed to debate something before finally relaxing a little. "I came to see you."

That shocked her. Floored her even. She would never in a million years thought that he'd make such a telling admission. Sure, they'd been close friends prior to his shooting, but they'd always beaten around the bush, never just coming right out to say what the relationship meant to both of them.

"You never came to visit."

She cursed herself. "I did."

"When I was sleeping. What are you avoiding, Emily?"

This time, she cursed Dave. He was the only one who would ever let slip that she had been there, that she'd been watching in his sleep. "It doesn't matter."

He huffed. "Can you come sit down please?" he asked. "I am very much at a disadvantage."

She snorted. "You're the one that decided to come. How did you get here anyway? Why did you come knowing it was a bad idea?" Still, she walked around the couch, perching on the coffee table instead of taking the other end of the couch.

His eyes met hers and though she could see the exhaustion in them, there was something else there, boiling under the surface with the intensity she'd come to know from him. "I'll answer your questions if you answer mine."

She cocked her head to the side. It was a fair deal and now that Matthew had been the one to open the door and he'd seen Cami, she did have some answering to do. "Okay."

--

Hotch took a deep breath. The next few minutes could very well make or break whatever relationship was between them. He'd made some decisions during his stay in the hospital. The only thing he'd really been able to do was think and he'd done that, slowly and carefully. "I take it that was Cami."

Emily nodded slowly. "Dave told you about her?"

"Dave mentioned her," he corrected subtly, but unable to mask his frustration. "So did Morgan, so did JJ, so did Reid." He didn't have to tell her that no one else had provided any information as to who this 'Cami' was. "She called you 'Mom'."

"As she rightly should," Emily said, with a chuckle she obviously didn't feel. "I gave birth to her."

"You don't have children."

"I have Cami. She hasn't been a child for a few years now," she responded to his blunt statement of fact.

"You never told me." He could hide the hurt and betrayal in his voice.

"She never came up," Emily replied quietly. "She's been at school since I started in the BAU, safe and sound away from everything here. "Camille Hannah Prentiss, if you'd like to look up the relevant birth information."

Part of him was irritated. She was being evasive, smart-assed about the whole thing. The other part of him was completely relieved. Obviously Cami was a carefully protected subject with her and she was lashing out in the only way she knew how, and a way he recognized. Emily had never done well with conflict and after so many years of keeping Cami to herself, Hotch couldn't be surprised at how carefully she protected her.

"The father?"

Emily looked away. "John Cooley."

He remembered the name. "He was killed."

She gazed out the window as she nodded, out onto the Washington Mall. "Hardest conversation I've ever had with her. Cami never knew her father."

He felt annoyance and pain rear up in him. "You never told her?"

Emily shot him a look. "Of course not. I was fifteen, Hotch and John wasn't mature enough to care for a child. My father brought me back to the States and I had Cami then turned around and finished my senior year at a public high school."

Still, as a father, he couldn't understand why she would have hidden something like that.

"Hotch, I knew it wouldn't matter," she said quietly. "Not to John. It did matter to Matthew."

"Benton." The one victim they'd been able to save.

"Right. He's as good as Cami's father, even though they don't share DNA. He's been here for her through every step of her life. He's been there for me when I thought I couldn't do it."

Suddenly, Hotch felt jealous. Matthew had supported Emily in the same way he'd finally admitted to himself he wanted to do. He'd thought he was a big part of her life, but now, with just finding out about Cami, Hotch wasn't so sure. A daughter, any child, was a big piece of information to keep from him, to keep from the team and he wasn't sure what to do with the information now that he had it.

"Hotch, the less people who knew about her the better. She lives in California, she rarely comes home because I'm working so much. The week I take off I go to California and we spend it in the sun and spray of the ocean. She's led as normal of a life as I can give her and I'm not going to jeopardize that by putting her out there for the world to see. I don't want to put her in danger because of my job."

As a parent himself, Hotch could understand that. Still, JJ had told the team about Henry. Granted, she'd been pregnant and it had been difficult to hide, but nevertheless, the team knew. They also knew about Jack. "We're friends, Emily."

"We are," she agreed instantly. "Nothing is going to change that, Hotch."

He wasn't sure he agreed. A daughter… "She gave me blood?"

"Yeah," Emily nodded, a fond smile flitting over her face. "None of the team matched and you needed blood to make it through the surgery."

He watched moisture fall unchecked down her cheek.

"You almost didn't make it," she whispered. "You'd lost so much blood by the time they got you to the hospital…"

Despite how much it pained him to lean forward and reach out his hand, he did so, resting it on her leg. "I didn't die, Emily."

"You could have," she replied simply and only with the sadness and fear. "If the bullet had been just a little to the right, if your neighbour hadn't called 9-1-1, if Cami hadn't been a match…"

"But all of that happened," he argued strongly, quietly and carefully. "I'm alive, I'm breathing, I'm here."

She threw herself at him, a move he hadn't anticipated and something she'd never done before. Sure, she used his shoulder as a pillow every once in a while, he wrapped a friendly arm around her shoulders to ward off a chill, but they'd never been in such close personal contact under such personal circumstances. For the time being, he ignored the twinge in his shoulder, grateful that she'd chosen – either consciously or subconsciously – to bury her head in the other side of his neck. He wrapped his good arm around her, trying to offer all of the comfort he could in his crippled state and trying not to pay too much attention to the way she was pressed so tightly against him.

"You were almost gone," he managed to make out through her sobs. "I almost lost you."

His hand came up, sliding a thumb under her chin to urge her head up. He met her eyes, holding her relentlessly. "Emily…"

She sniffled.

He couldn't stop himself from leaning forward and pressing his mouth to hers. He tasted the salt, but ignored it, coaxing her response. Her hand cupped his cheek before she eased away and looked down.

"I'm fine, Emily. I'm fine and I'm here and I'm not going anywhere."

She wiped her eyes, until he brushed her hands away with one of his own to wipe the tears away himself.

"I need you in my life, Emily. If Jack wasn't enough to make me fight my way to consciousness, you would have been." He smiled slightly. "You're right, I almost died and I've had a lot of time to think while recovering in a hospital."

Her eyes searched his, as if testing his sincerity. "So kissing me wasn't just to shut me up?"

Hotch's own chuckle was watery. "No," he answered quietly, "Kissing wasn't just to shut you up."

She nodded, looking away again. "God…"

It was a lot to take in, he knew it. It was hard on his end too, reconciling keeping Cami a secret from him with the fact that he realized best friend was an understatement for what he felt for her. He'd missed her in the hospital, had hoped day upon day that she'd actually come to visit him and talk, get him out of the inherent boredom.

"Yeah…" he agreed, resting his forehead on her shoulder, taking in her scent, one so familiar to him.

"Hotch, I can't… I don't…"

His heart stopped.

"I want to, I think." She sighed. "This is all so confusing."

"It's no less confusing for me, sweetheart," he murmured.

"I think… I think we need to be careful, Hotch. I don't want to jump into anything because you almost died." She shivered.

"It would be a bad idea," he agreed. "But that doesn't mean that we can't try."

"Try?" she asked quietly.

"Try," he agreed. "We have a lot to talk about, there's no doubt about that."

She smiled slightly.

"Go to dinner with me, Emily," he said quietly.

"Like a date?" she asked, her fingers stroking through his hair.

"Like a date," he agreed.

"Now?"

Hotch looked down at himself, at the sweats, knowing he hadn't had a shower. "Maybe not now," he agreed. He sighed. "Though I could do with another pain-killer."

She sighed, pushing herself off of him. "I'll drive you home."

I was going to end it in this chapter, but then I realized that there was the whole Foyet issue that I never addressed and it's kind of the perfect way to have things even out... So this may be a lot longer than I'd anticipated. Should be fun. Maybe Cami'll come back into it.

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