Disclaimer: I do not own anything from CSI: Miami, wouldn't want to!

A/N: Thanks you for all the reviews, alerts and encouragement! Just so you know, all the medical stuff is not accurate. Just enjoy it for what it is, FICTION! Sorry for such a short chapter, this one will be longer!

Ryan woke up, his boss holding him down, calling out his name. The nightmare was so real he was still shaking. "H?"

"I'm here Ryan, you're safe. Must have been some dream...do you want to talk about it?" He was still gently holding onto the young man trying to ground him.

"No...no, sorry to be so much trouble."

"You are no trouble at all." Horatio pressed the call button for the nurse.

"Why did you do that?"

"Son, you need to be made more comfortable. You're covered in sweat and I don't want you to get a cold."

The nurse came in and Horatio explained what happened. They gave him a warm sponge bath and changed his sheets and gown. Within a short period of time Ryan was once again comfortably sleeping. The next day would prove eventful.

Alexx and Frank both visited Ryan in the morning. Ryan still feeling drowsy because of his interrupted sleep, was quiet. In the afternoon Calliegh and Eric made an appearance.

Ryan had just finished lunch with Horatio when they came in. Horatio stood to leave to give them time alone. "You leaving H"

Seeing the panic in Ryan's eyes, "Do you want me to stay?"

Not wanting to be alone with them, "Yes, please."

"Okay Ryan, I'll just be over there," pointing to the chair by the door.

"Hi, Ryan," Calliegh began, "So glad you're awake and getting better."

"We stopped by yesterday but we didn't want to wake you." Eric stated.

Ryan still hurt by their inaction and lack of compassion when he needed it most, just weakly smiled and nodded. He knew that his previous actions made them mad and so he said quietly, "I'm so sorry about what I did, I don't blame you for not trusting me, for being so angry." He couldn't bear looking at their faces. He didn't want to see the disappointed or angry looks they might have.

"What!.. Ryan you don't owe us any apologies, we owe you...big time!" Eric moved forward and actually took Ryan's hand. "I was way out of line with you, man! I cut you off without getting the whole story, I am so sorry."

"Me too!" Calliegh chimed in, "We were looking for you the next day to give you a chance to explain, we were too late. We failed you Ryan, as teammates as well as friends." Calliegh laid her hand softly on Ryan's arm hoping he would accept their apologies.

Ryan almost flinched when Eric took his hand. He listened to their words and felt confused. 'Why are they being nice to me? Are they really sorry or are they just feeling guilty? I can't think right now. I don't know what to tell them.' "I'm..tired." He closed his eyes hiding the tears he refused to let fall. He really was exhausted emotionally and from being awake so long.

"Okay, we'll see you later," Cal said and gave his arm a slight squeeze.

"We'll talk more when you feel better," Eric reluctantly let go of his hand and left with Calliegh. 'I hope I can start fresh with Ryan. I can't believe how selfish I've been, not really trying to be his friend. The times we did get along he was pretty nice. I sure haven't gotten to know him though. I'll try harder this time, if he'll give me a chance.' "I can't believe he actually apologized to us. Cal, maybe we could have him over for dinner or drinks once he gets better. I don't know what else to do to show him how sorry I am."

"I know Eric, I just wanted to cry when he told us how sorry he was. I guess we'll have a lot of work ahead of us to show him we're sincere. Maybe he'll let us help him in other ways."

"I really hope so Calliegh." The rest of the ride back to Eric's was in silence.

Horatio went back over and took Ryan's hand, noticing the stray tear that managed to leak out from his closed eyes. "Things will get better Ryan, we're all going to do our best to help you. You just rest now, I'll wake you for dinner."

After dinner Horatio noticed a sad look flutter across Ryan's face.

"What's wrong Ryan?"he concernedly asked. He wasn't prepared for the questions that came at him.

"Why...why are you all being so nice to me? I'm still the same person. Why do you care about me now? I've never been important to anyone before this happened, I don't get it. Why? Is it just guilt, trying to ease your consciences? I just don't know."

" Ryan, I really do care. But I also can't deny the guilt I feel. I'm truly sorry it took this situation to help me tear down the walls I put up around my own heart, not letting anyone get too close. Not even meeting my son Kyle could penetrate. What happened to you...when I heard you needed surgery and were critically injured...all I could think about was I needed to be here for you. There's so much more I need to talk to you about, a lot of important things. I just want to wait until you're strong enough."

"Okay...thanks for being honest with me. I'm kinda tired." Ryan closed his eyes hoping sleep would come quickly. Horatio took his place next to his charge hoping that he would be spared the nightmares that seemed to start plaguing him.

The next few days went rather quickly for the two. Ryan was gaining more strength finally able to eat a less restricted diet, able to eat on his own as well as walk a little each day. He continued to have visitors come by and had many cards and a few flowers. Yet he wouldn't talk about what happened. He wouldn't let anyone see how hurt he felt at being abandoned and the guilt he still felt over what he did. After years of masking his feelings he was able to fool everyone into thinking he was fine. Making progress he was encouraged by Dr. Spenser when told he would be able to go home. 'Finally I'll be left alone, I'm just so tired of pretending nothing is wrong.'