Chaptah 2:

A Day in the life of Sasuke!

*****

We are now standing outside Sasuke's bedroom window trying to be quiet, to no avail. Fangirls #335 and #002 are giggling like two drunken banshees. SHUT THE HECK UP, #335 AND #002!

We cock our ears towards the window and hear the faint squeaking of slightly rusted bedsprings. It's pretty obvious that Sasuke is either getting up, or rolling over in bed. Regardless, I MUST RECORD IT!

Um…Fangirl #609, give me a leg up, please. Thank you.

After I get myself completely balanced, I zoom in on the angelic figure before me. Oh, be still my heart!

Sasuke, our beloved Greek god carved from the most beautiful marble…WE LOVE YOU!

I record with accuracy and professionalism as Sasuke flips his shiny raven-colored hair, while standing in a sexy man-pose.

Fangirls, you will die from sheer and utter bliss when you see this! Let's view it in slow motion…

Sasuke seems to be heading towards the bathroom…I MUST FOLLOW!

Fangirl #609, hoist me up, please. Thank you--oomph!

After #609 throws me through the window and I dust myself off a bit, I stealthily creep down the hall towards the bathroom. The coast is clear, so I go a little further…

There's water running--I think Sasuke is taking a shower! I MUST HAVE THIS DATA! Maybe I can sneak in without being noticed. I turn the knob and--I'm in!

If I can squeeze into this little corner here, in between this wall, I'll be safe from wandering eyes…there! Now to catch this footage.

Dear Fangirls, are you hearing what I'm hearing? Sasuke is singing in the shower! HE'S SINGING IN THE FREAKIN' SHOWER!

He has such a beautiful voice!

Ya callin' me daddy…daddy… Ya callin' me daddy…daddy…girl, I'll be ya daddy…

Good God! Who knew Sasuke listened to stuff like this?!

I must…not…faint!

…Crap. It seems that the steam is fogging up the lens. I shall carefully wipe it.

Is it clearer now? Okay, good. Now, back to Sas--HOLY MOTHER OF WALNUTS! SASUKE LEFT THE SHOWER CURTAIN OPEN!

Oh, my God! Am I getting all this?!

He has such a lovely pale man-boy body! I MUST ZOOM IN EVEN FURTHER!

Look at those long, muscular arms…

That manly chest…

Those rock-hard abs…

And that sexy tush! So plump and…squeezable…

Oh, and his legs are great, too. Now, let's go back up--

OH, SWEET JESUS, HE TURNED AROUND!

A stream of blood gushes from my nose as I try to squeeze from in-between the wall. Sasuke turns when he hears all the racket I am making.

Oh no--he's coming towards me!

I RUN FOR MY LIFE!

I round the corner and zoom in to…SASUKE'S BEDROOM!
YES! FREE AT LAST, FREE AT LAST!

I am instantly surrounded by expectant fangirls upon leaping from the window. SHOW US! They demand.

But not yet, I can't! Sasuke's on to us!

The Fangirls gasp. What do I think we should do?!

I say we make like a tree and get the heck outta here!

We make ourselves scarce just as Sasuke reaches the window.

We are victorious! NOW ON TO THE NEXT PERSON!

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