The Big Guy's Return

A Duncan and Gwen FanFic (Part 5)

Gwen's POV

I think I passed out. I think I literally passed out. This whole show is driving me nuts, well at least Duncan is here. He's really the only guy on this earth who hasn't gone crazy yet from Chris' challenges. In some ways I really want to get voted off. No more near-death experiences, or extreme exhaustion, or well, anything that's happened here.

I woke up this morning but didn't actually remember waking up or Chris' stupid morning call, hey; maybe he's giving us a bit of a break. I basically sleep walked into the cafeteria and slid next to Duncan.

"Good morning, Gwen." He said. I gave off a weak smile. Then unexpectedly he gave me a peck on the cheek. I felt nervous for a second, Courtney would kill us if she saw that. I elbowed him in the gut,

"What the hell are you doing?" I whispered. I quickly glanced over at Courtney who looked as if she was holding back anger instead of lashing it at me.

"Saying good morning..." He looked as confused as I was but also made my question sound stupid.

"Okay contestants! Today's challenge is all about those comedy movies!" He started laughing. "Everyone meet on the carnival set in 5 minutes." He laughed his way out of the food tent.

The remaining five of us made our way to the carnival set. The set was covered in flashing lights and cardboard amusement rides, but everything looked so real. I wonder why...

"As I said before, this challenge is all about the belching, farting, and pain that makes a comedy movie worth watching."

I heard Duncan snickering beside me, "Too bad the big guy isnt here, he could cover two of those things."

"I'm glad you said that Duncan...Hey! OWEN!" Everyone turned to the direction Chris was talking to. With one big belch, one of the cardboard booths fell to reveal Owen gourging himself with baked beans. He turned to look at us and burped again.

"Hey guys! It's so great to see you!" He put the beans down and ran over to muffle everyone in a huge hug. "I'm back guys!!!!" Then he let one rip.

"Oh my god." I shouted in disgust, covering my nose. The rest of them did the same.

"Now I understand the pain part of it. It rieks." Harold said, grabbing his nose.

"I hope wedgies are allowed." Duncan joked. And I saw Harold awkwardly backing away from him.

"Anything to get the crowd laughing." I looked at Duncan who winked at me.

"What crowd?" Heather asked.

"Since none of you really think each other are funny enough, we've asked a few viewers of the show to come in and rate how funny you are." Chris then pointed to a crowded set of bleachers. "Okay, so this is the challenge: You're gonna be separated into pairs; Duncan and Harold, Heather and Owen, Courtney and Gwen, you guys can use anything from the prop house to make your 5 minute skit as funny as possible. There will be a Laugh-o-meter used and the pair who gets the most laughs gets invisiblity tonight. Are ya ready? GO!!!!" The six of us ran for the prop house but then I saw Duncan going into the supply shed. I imagined what painful things he would do to Harold.

"Hello? Goth girl? Earth to goth girl?" Courtney was staring at me trying to get my attention.

"Huh?" I said.

"What do you know thats funny?" She said and I saw her roll her eyes.

"How about I trip you or something, that's bound to get a few laughs." I chuckled. Courtney started to protest. "Do you wanna win or not?"

She started to say something but then stopped. "Fine. What do you want me to do?" She muttered.

"I'll give you laxitives before the skit. You trip, fall into mud. Then you fart. You get up and your fuming mad and you try to maul me. The end." I said.

"I like the end the best. But I sound like a pig." She sounded annoyed.

"Pig equals funniness which equals winning. I'm not that great at math but I know that it adds up." I said and headed for the kitchen.

"Fine. But where are you going?" She said and ran after me.

"Getting you some laxitives." When she wasn't looking I smiled. This was going to be the best challenge ever.

Chris's POV

5...4...3...2...1...TIME's UP! I pulled out my megaphone, "All contestants please report back to the carnival set NOW!" After shouting my head off I slumped back into my director's chair. They came back to the set with tons of props. "Okay, Duncan and Harold how 'bout you guys go first. Oh and don't forget about the Laugh-o-meter." I chuckled and waited for the show to start.

Harold just stood there and winced a bit when Duncan gave him a wedgie. I heard the crowd laugh. Then Harold's face turned red with rage and he charged at Duncan. Then he ran into a rake like they do in the old cartoons. It was hilarious. Untill I heard the roar of a chainsaw. I jumped.

"Hold up, Duncan! I said prop house and this is turning into a horror skit. Anyway, you guys get a 7 out of 10 on the Laugh-o-meter. NEXT IS OWEN AND HEATHER!" I sat back down.

Owen came out and was eating beans. Heather came behind him and tried to push him but he wouldn't budge. I heard a few chuckles from the crowd. Heather kept trying to push him over into a puddle of mud. When he finally fell into the puddle he got everything covered in mud, including me. Then Owen farted from all the beans, stinking up the place and making Heather furious. I gave them a 8 out of 10 on the Laugh-o-meter.

"Okay, lastly we have Courtney and Gwen." I said and sat back down.

Courtney was walking, then Gwen tripped her and she fell face first into the same puddle of mud. Then Courtney started to shriek with anger and started to chase Gwen with one of the props. The crowd started to giggle. She was just about to kill Gwen when she farted. Her face turned from rage, to embarassment in less then a few seconds. She dropped the prop and ran for the restroom. That had to be the most funniest. They were given a 9 out of 10.

"Okay people! Gilded Chris ceremony in 10 minutes!" Time for latte break.

Courtney's POV

I think it was actually worth it. Getting my ass kicked by the goth girl isn't so bad when winning is in reach. I strode toward the stage and knew a Gilded Chris will be in my hands by the end of the day. I sat down on the bleachers and rolled my eyes when Chris appeared at the podeium.

"Alright, great skits. The two who are invinsible tonight are Courtney and Gwen just to remind you and just so you know, the big guy ain't staying, he's also going home tonight alsong with the loser who's riding in the Lame-o-zine... anyway, cast your votes!" I grabbed the voting device and automatically pressed Harold's name. I still wanted revenge when he voted me off last season and it would be sweet revenge if I was able to vote him off tonight.

"The votes are in!" Chris said and took the results from Chef. "Courtney, Gwen, Heather, and Duncan. You guys are the final four of season 2. Sorry Harold. Oh and you should hold your breath in the limo, cause I think Owen still has gas." I let out a laugh. Revenge is sweet!

Duncan's POV

I had survived this awesome challenge. Not only did I get to charge Doris with a chainsaw and see him get voted off, I get the whole trialer to myself. I walked into my trailer and grabbed my headphones. I jumped onto my bunk and just started to fall asleep when I thought I heard a knock. I sat up and lowered the music. Then I heard the knock again. I went to the door and saw Gwen standing outside.

"Three girls, and two of them are Heather and Courtney. Can I stay here for the night?" She said.

"Sure." I answered and let her in. She crashed onto one of the bunks. The trailer was quiet for a while.

"Damn it's cold." I heard her mutter. I climbed out of my bunk and slid up next to her. "Holy god, why did you do that?" She asked.

"So I could do this." And I kissed her.

REVIEW!!!!!