Beautiful People

Chapter 15: Then Add Up Our Strength

Beta: beta'd by strawberries and napkins

...

My other senses feel heightened. I can't see anything but blackness, but I can feel the fabric of Sasuke's shirt, I can smell the fresh air that is rapidly filling my nostrils, and I can hear the rustling of the trees as we pass by. I'm jostling back and forth between Sasuke's arms as he carries me, but when I tell him not to travel too far he doesn't respond.

It's frightening not to know where we are. How can I trust Sasuke when not only hours ago he was reading my private journal for information?

The truth is, I can't. But I'm not able to fair much better on my own, so I'll leave it alone for now. My mind starts to wander again and I start to think about what Lia said about being beautiful. Truthfully, her perspective doesn't surprise me because I could have imagined Neji saying the same thing, but it didn't make it less meaningful.

She was right though. I had lots of problems, with lots of people. Naruto, Sakura, Sasuke, Neji, Ino, Kiba…they all have their issues that intertwine with mine like a giant bow knot. I know that eventually I'm going to have to fix it and start from the beginning if I ever want to believe that beautiful is a word I can describe to myself.

On the inside...the outside…it's all the same isn't it? Beautiful. It bothers me that I don't truly understand what that means. There's beauty all around me, but I can't even see it. Both metaphorically and literally, I guess.

We finally slow down and Sasuke gently lays me against what I think might be a rock or a log. The sound of rushing water brings back images of the embankment and now I'm angry because he took us so far back that we're halfway back to Konoha.

He places a hand to my forehead suddenly, and I jump. "Your eyes still hurt?" He said with what I think could be a hint of worry.

"I still can't see anything. What was that?" I rub at my eyes painfully and imagine them swollen and red-looking.

"Possibly tear gas. It won't last long." He murmurs and pulls his hand away. I nod and cover my eyes with one hand, remembering the healing jutsu lessons from Sakura as I try them on myself. Immediately, the sensation engulfs my pain and I get a few seconds of relief. It almost feels like the darkness went away, but when I blink and see nothing, I sigh. No, the darkness just went from black to gray.

For the first time since the incident I realize that I'm still clutching my journal. When I pull it to my chest I can hear Sasuke snort and I want to roll my eyes once he speaks.

"That book means that much to you?" I can't figure out what his expression may look like but I'm guessing he's scowling at me.

I snort. "You shouldn't be sounding so arrogant considering you had your nose in my book only hours ago."

He doesn't say anything for a while, and the rushing sound of water makes my stomach crawl with butterflies. I feel vulnerable, weak, and dying to get anywhere else.

"Is everything in it…true?" His voice is hoarse.

I wish I could glare. "Depends on how much you read." I snap, and pull the book closer to me, repeating the process of healing my eyes. It gets easier to blink now, and the burning pain has dulled down to almost nothing. I hope that this won't last long, because I'd rather be talking about our failed mission rather than the contents of my journal.

"Up to your stay with Sakura." I'm imagining Sasuke's eyes avoiding my gaze although I couldn't have seen it anyway. He sounds too doubtful. "Did it really bother you that much, our…"

I sigh. "Not now, Sasuke. We have to deal with the mission first." There is another awkward silence, and then Sasuke breathes harshly through his nose and finally gives up our conversation about my journal. Honestly, I don't think he even has a right to force me to talk about myself.

And when did we even become close enough to talk about things like my self-esteem? These are the kind of things I'd do with Sakura, but definitely not Sasuke. I don't trust him.

He starts to talk again and my mind begins to wander once I close my blind eyes. The other senses…taste, feel, hear, smell...they are overpowering and I wonder what it would be like to be blind permanently. I can paint the picture of where we are all by myself, but it makes my head swim and my stomach boil. I get lightheaded and I can feel myself kneel forward and for safety I toss my journal aside. Sasuke catches me in time, but it's too late.

I heave until I can taste the stomach acid at the base of my throat. It burns, and it hurts in a good way. My vision begins to clear until I can see Sasuke, only in a blurry fashion. I can't tell if he looks pissed or genuinely concerned about my current condition. I don't even have the decency to blush as I try to wipe away any flecks of vomit on the corners of my mouth.

"You should start to get better now," he murmurs in my ear as he helps me upright, but my body feels too heavy. I collapse against the rocky support, gasping for air as Sasuke tries to repeat what he was saying. I'm listening this time, that the scroll was a copy of the original, and directions for Lia to find them. Sasuke did a bit of snooping in Lia's home. The real guy behind it is her brother, and a few penniless men wanting to make a difference, even if they have to take their own lives.

Apparently, Lia's brother hates Konoha, but she doesn't. I'm not sure if Lia knew that trap would've hurt me, but it's pointless to think about it now.

I mention my thoughts to Sasuke who shrugs and reiterates my point. "It doesn't matter. Heal yourself again," he commands. I nod limply and repeat the healing of my eyes, and it gets better. The blur actually goes away and for the first time I can clearly see Sasuke, the crystal-blue river, and the rock I'm leaning against.

I guess I started grinning like an idiot because I can see the corners of Sasuke's mouth twitch upwards. It's enough to make me to tackle him in all of my happiness and excitement, but he stops me halfway.

"Don't do that. You smell." He growled, but I couldn't feel any malice in the sentence. I keep smiling.

"I can actually see you, you grumpy—wait! Sasuke, S-Sasuke, stop that!" He tosses me over his shoulder and while I'm banging my fists against his back he keeps walking and eventually tosses me into the river with a deep chuckle. It was sudden and random, but just what I needed.

I go straight down, and the feeling of rushing water against my dirty fingers and face is so relieving that I'm not even mad. I close my eyes and do a little spin under the water before I come back up with a smile. Sasuke is avoiding my gaze, but I think he might have been smiling too.

For fun, I splash some water in his direction. "Your turn." He pauses for a second, and then he dives in too, only it's gracefully and I feel myself gasp as I watch the raven splice through the water smoothly like he was some type of Poseidon God all the way to where I was. With a strong arm wrapped my floating legs, he pulls me back down under the current.

I can see Sasuke's amused face clearly through all of the bubbles, and it's so nice that I wonder why he doesn't show it more often.

It's midday, close to sunset when Sasuke and I are finally done with our aquatic battles. He discards of his wet shirt to dry and advises me to do the same, but I don't. It doesn't matter how comfortable Sasuke is around me because he knows I'm not interested in him sexually. I just tell him that I'm not quite as bold as he is.

Instead, I lie on my back and create a big wet puddle in the mushy grass and let the sun do its work, drying my clothes. I close my eyes, and then Sasuke lays down on the opposite of me and makes a loud grunting sound once he gets comfortable. The top of our wet heads are touching and it reminds me of a time when Sakura and I had once done the same thing at a bathhouse…

My eyes widen. I think...that it dawned on me why Sasuke was being so…un-Sasuke like, because he probably read about my relationship with Sakura and I. I'm sure that I've never written about the particular scene of us at the bathhouse but what I do know is that Sasuke is trying to replace her for my sake.

If that's the case, then he lied. He might have read farther that that, and this just re-establishing the fact that Uchiha Sasuke is untrustworthy.

My heart flutters in the bad way. I don't know if he's sympathizing with me, or empathizing with me, or maybe I just got the whole thing backwards. My emotions are conflicted; I don't know whether to be happy or aggravated.

But the more I think about it, the worse the feelings in my chest and stomach grow. So it comes out, "Stop trying to replace Sakura already." My voice is weak, but there's a resounding tremor in it that makes Sasuke pause before responding.

"I'm not replacing anyone." He gives an extra snort to make me believe him, but of course, I don't. I sit up and open my mouth to speak, but I stop. There's a light, dusting pink across his cheeks that makes all the anger in my heart dissipate. He doesn't have to say anything else. We both know that he was just looking out for me…again. Maybe he wasn't trying to take Sakura's place for my sake; maybe he was just being Sasuke. I smiled.

It must be embarrassing for him, to try to comfort me but it was nice. And then I understood a bit better why Naruto might have been so crazily in love with him.

I should've known that nothing as good as that would've lasted long. Fortunately, the mission isn't over yet but it looks like our time together is. The directions say that the plotting team is planning to split up. One team is heading to the west Konoha gate, the other to the east.

Sasuke will take the east gate, and I'll be heading to the west. Of course, he doesn't tell me about this until we're too close to splitting up for me to protest. Nighttime has fallen over the forest, and I'm still damp, still cold. All of our supplies were left behind, and all I have is the journal, and soon, not even Sasuke anymore.

The moon is half-full, partially illuminating the path that we walked deliberately slowly. I was sad somehow, this time I finally think that maybe Sasuke and I were getting somewhere. If that had lasted any longer, I might have been come clean and told him what he wanted to know about so badly.

But I know there will be other times for that. The fork in the road grinds our trek to a stop.

I look at him and he looks back at me. His face is expressionless, but it doesn't stop my stomach from churning and my eyes to grow dry. I tackle him into a hug. He grunts loudly, and his body is stiff. I don't expect him to hug me back and he doesn't, I just hold him until he relaxes and his chin rests in my tousled hair. It's the first time I notice how tall he is compared to me.

"B-Baka.." he mutters. I hug his lean frame tightly, and only for a second do I wish he were Sakura instead because the spicy smell of musk and water fills my senses. No, this is Sasuke. I was satisfied with Sasuke.

My voice is low. "I think…there is something I can learn from Lia, from all of this." I feel him exhale harshly into my hair.

"There probably is. Just try not to kill yourself before you figure it out," he smirks and I pull away with a wispy smile. His lips twitch.

"Right back at you! Someone needs to take care of Naruto, and don't forget, you and I still have business." I do my best not to hug him again and we finally part ways. Sasuke goes left. I go right.

After a few steps, I stop and listen to Sasuke's light trekking sounds until he's too far away and I know that it'll be the last time that I'll see of Sasuke until this mission was over.

I know I can manage on my own even without his support. Besides, there was something I need to learn from all of this.

Now the mission has taken a new turn, putting Hinata all by herself to complete the rest of it alone! And now, Beautiful People has now become a weekly update thanks to my completed story 7 Deadly Sins. All of my free time is dedicated to you, my lovely readers!

Thanks for reading and please review!