Hello everyone. I sincerely thank everyone for reviewing. Well, this chapter took a shorter time to write, but, it's just a good as the other one, I promise. So, have fun reading.

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I'm grocery shopping. Yeah, I know, it's a scary thought, but the only thing they feed us at our dorm is cheap fish (gosh I hope they don't resort to taking the one's from the campus aquariums) and Campbell soup, and I just can't stand it anymore. I must have at least some variety.

Oh, and the ice cream I was eating yesterday, Dana accidentally bought that while shopping for ingredients for her science project, where she had to build a synapse between two cells out of cake mix and Jell-O, because the lady in front of her at the checkout had an ice cream fetish, so Dana somehow ended up buying one of the lady's many boxes of ice cream.

So anyway, as I'm throwing into the trailer just about everything from fatty potato chips to chocolate ice cream, this guy starts talking to me. I know. It's very peculiar.

"Hey, aren't you Dana's friend?" Unknown being says. I look up and I see that it's that guy who came over and asked for Dana because, as she put it, they were working on some project together.

"Yeah," I reply, piling up some more ice cream. "How'd the project go?" I ask, shoving some chocolate in.

"Oh, um, went quite well," he says, flashing me a lopsided grin. "Oh, by the way, I'm Paul," he says, sticking out his hand, which I shake.

"Suze," I say, rather distractedly, since I just noticed that the store is having a sale. It's a two for one discount on potato chips, so I throw in one more bag. "Well, it was nice meeting you," I add, rushing over to the checkout stand. Yeah, I know that a hot guy just happened to come up to me and start talking, but I noticed that there was no line and fully intended to use up the opportunity that just so conveniently opened up for me.

"Yeah, see you later," I hear Paul say after me. I begin shoveling out all the piles of junk food that I'd collected and the checkout lady begins scanning them, partially blinding me with her laser. She gives me a very evil stare, as though I just offered her something sickly, like slime.

I commence in putting all of my groceries into plastic bags. She thanks me in this kind of morbid-I-wish-I-was-rather-dead-than-have-to-scan-people's-stupid-groceries-and-get-paid-really-crappy monotone voice. I grab some money from my purse and hand it to her. Then I head back to my dorm.

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I'm sitting on the couch of my dorm and there's ice cream tied around my forehead. I resorted to using my really nice Guess stretchy elastic band to tie the ice cream boxes into place.

Yeah, I know you're probably wondering why I have ice cream tied around my head. Well, it's quite an interesting story:

I started to heat up again, so I, like, checked my temperature and it was normal, so I wasn't sick or anything. Taking a shower was out of the question because we've got no water---turns out the dorm has this thing it does where they close off tap water for a day in order to give students a taste of how pioneers used to feel before tap water was invented. I just think it's to piss us off and save money on their water bill---therefore, ice is also ruled out. So I just grabbed the coldest thing in the house, which is the ice cream, and tied it around my head in order to stop nuclear fusion from occurring inside it. So, now I'm walking around, or more like sitting around, with my head flanked by two giant ice-cream boxes. Pretty attractive, huh?

Then…I heard a knock on the door. First, you know, I just tried pretending that I'm not home. Then, when the knocking didn't go away, I decided to just go ahead and open it, having completely forgotten that I have two giant iceboxes on my head (though I don't know how because they're so freaking big, and heavy, that they practically obstruct my vision). I must have been really out of it, I guess.

So, stupid me goes to open the door, completely unaware of the tragedy about to be played out.

Characters within tragedy:

Jesse

Susannah with ice cream on head

Jesse: "Susannah, why do you have ice cream on your head?"

Me: "Oh…it's…I'm doing an experiment… I was supposed to create an elastic band with a strong hold, and…to test it, I need it to hold something really heavy, thus the ice cream.

(Jesse nods understandingly)

Jesse: "What class is this for?"

Me:

Jesse: "And why does the elastic say Guess on the side?"

Me: "It doesn't say Guess, it says Guss. That's my label."

Jesse: "No, it says Guess."

(I take the elastic off and place the ice cream boxes on the table)

Me: (looking at the elastic) "Oh, I must have misspelled it then." (I start laughing hysterically because I'm such a moron and Jesse, horrified, takes a step back).

Jesse: "Right then, are we going?"

Me: (about to say where, when I remember we have dance today) "Yeah, let me just get my stuff."

I have never, I mean never, been so mortified in my life. And really, why did he have to ask so many questions?

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"Move dis vay, now dis," Boris dictates, swinging his arms around frantically. "No, you do wrong, dis vay, and move yer hips!" Boris shouts at me.

"I'm trying," I shout back, getting pretty fed up with him. "I wish they sent him somewhere relaxing for a while, like Antarctica, it'd be good for him," I say irritably, talking mostly to myself. I hear Jesse laugh. I give him a sharp stare and he stops abruptly. I'm still really annoyed at him for the ice cream encounter. And, as if that wasn't embarrassing enough, I've now got to dance in front of a whole bunch of people, who, turns out, are the parents of some kids who are participating in a dance competition that's taking place today.

"Vere are you steppin', you go totally wron' derecton!" Boris shouts at me. I ignore him.

Oh, by the way, I've already told Gabrielle to look out after Josh and make sure he stays off the killing business. But, now that I think about it, Josh might not even have to do the dirty work. It might be that guy's job. You know, the one he was talking with. Maybe making Gabrielle keep a look out for Josh serves no purpose since he might not even be the one doing the killing. Oh, why am I so stupid?

Oh, and hear this, in my dreamy-like state (I was kind of not really paying attention to my dancing, or, quite plainly, where I was going) I'd somehow ended up standing near this little bush they have at the dance studio, and, thinking it was Jesse, I started talking to it.

In front of lots of other people, who, evidently, were watching me, because they started to point at the "crazy kid over there."

God, can this day get any worse?

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Apparently, it can.

Jesse asked me if I wanted to go get something to drink with him so that we can "talk." Oh god, he thinks I've gone completely mental. He started saying things like, "Oh, it isn't uncommon for people to start speaking to inanimate objects," and, "the behavior mostly occurs because a person suffers from being ostracized for a long time." Which basically means that I have no friends, thus I resort to commencing relationships with non-living objects. So, quite simply, what he is saying is that he thinks I've gone completely off the deep-end.

I told him that I couldn't go get something to drink with him because I had things to do. He just looked at me all sad, as if told him that I was about to die or something, ---though, when I think about it, I think I might. Die that is---and said if ever I needed to talk I could call him. Yeah, right.

I went straight to feeding my fish. They were all really happy to see me.

Oh god, I really am sad. I've made friends with fish. But, they're definitely alive, so Jesse's wrong, I don't have relationships with non-living things. The fish are alive, but, with my feeding skills, I don't know how long that will last.

After I was done I went straight to my dorm. I thought it was about time for me to start wallowing in self-pity and filling up on junk food. But, guess who I met on my way back? It was none other than that guy who asked Dana out and she said no because she thought that she wasn't going to stay for longer than a year because she had no tuition money.

So, when I saw him, I said:

"Hi, long time no see." He doesn't answer. He just looks at me kind of puzzled, as though he's trying to figure out a very complex math problem. I take it he doesn't remember me. "How come you stopped bothering Dana for a date?" I ask.

His eyes widen, as suddenly he recognizes who I am. He replies with, "It wouldn't have worked out." It's a bit funny how both him and Dana responded in much the same way. It's as though they've agreed upon the perfect sentence together.

So, I counter-attack his answer with, "Yes it would, she is planning on staying, you know?"

I know I should probably have just left it alone when he gave me the Dana-replicate-sentence---I mean, he's no mute, he could just go up to Dana and try to once more convince her to go out with him and say that it doesn't matter that she's leaving---but I couldn't. Dana probably hasn't been out with anyone since school started, by which I mean since first grade, and I highly doubt she went out with anyone before then. So you see, I couldn't just let this perfectly normal guy walk away. I had to do something.

"Staying for what?" he asks me, raising his eyebrows sadly.

"Well, she's isn't leaving University after first year, like she originally planned, she's going to sit it out for four full years," I reply.

"Why was she planning on leaving?" he asks confusedly.

"Didn't she tell you when you…?" I ask. Then I realize, maybe she hadn't. Told him, I mean. "Well, she doesn't have tuition money to continue classes after this year, that's why she rejected you when you asked her out, she didn't think she was staying, but now that I've entered a contest for her---"

"What contest?" He asks, his eyes lighting up.

"The contest, you know, the one where you can win sixty grand---"

"Really? I…that…that's wonderful…that she can stay, I mean," He says, looking sincerely happy.

"Well, that's not for certain, you know, I might not win, but I'm sure she'll be more willing now to go out with you, now that she has a slightly bigger chance of staying, well, as opposed to nil. I mean, she's really nice and all, I'm sure she'll give you a chance," I say. After a short silence I continue with, "So, are you going to talk to her?"

"Uh, yeah, I…really hadn't known why she…but…now that all obstacles…are out the way…now that she's able to stay she might actually agree to …" he starts muttering incoherently and I just sort of tune out. I only surface back to reality when I hear him say: "Oh, I'm Matt."

"I'm Suze," I reply dazedly.

"It was nice meeting you," he says. "And I'll be sure to drop by, you know…"

"Yah, well, I'll see you later then," I say, and he walks off.

So now, having reinstated Matt and Dana, I'm relaxing on the couch, stuffing ice cream into my mouth, when I hear someone knocking on the door.

Oh, god. Can't people just leave me alone?

It's Jesse. Again. He's such a bacteria. Doesn't he have a life?

"What the hell do you want?" I ask bitterly. I really don't have time for him right now. I mean, I am really busy, what with all that junk food still waiting for me.

"I just wanted to see how you were doing," he says, looking around at all the junk-food wrappers on the floor. "Susannah," he says exasperatedly, letting himself into my dorm, "junk food isn't the answer to your problems," and sits down on the couch.

"Okay, I get the message, can you leave now?" I say viciously. I start putting ice cream into my mouth.

Jesse looks at me as though I've just begun eating my carpet.

"I see that you've resorted to eating your experiment now," he says jokingly. I eye him maliciously. "How was your experiment, by the way, did you learn anything useful?" he asks, smiling in that evil sort of way. He knows it wasn't an experiment. He's just making fun of me.

"Ok, so I didn't actually have any sort of experiment, but I was really hot and we didn't have any water, so I couldn't take a shower," I start saying. Jesse begins to laugh at me. "I had no choice, Ok? You can stop laughing now," I continue saying, which only makes him laugh harder. I go to sit down, agitated, on the couch and feverishly begin feeding myself ice cream, to which Jesse responds by grabbing it away.

"Hey, give me my ice cream back," I say. I try taking it away from him but he moves it up out of my reach. I start grabbing at his hands.

"Susannah, it really isn't very healthy to eat so much ice cream," he says while attempting to ward me off. I am now semi-standing on Jesse's knees trying pathetically to re-unite myself with my sugary friend.

"I don't care," I shout at him. I must look like such a dork. I start to laugh. "I want my ice cream back," I say, while both Jesse and me befriend a fit of laughter. I am now so exhausted from all laughing that I hardly have the energy to move my arms and probably look like a giant slug moving in slow motion.

I now attempt to actually stand on Jesse's knees, which doesn't turn out to be quite so successful and I trip. Inevitably, I begin to fall.

Midway through my fall Jesse manages to catch me---he dropped the ice cream---and I end up on top of him, like, the sort of on top of him that, if anybody happened to come in and see us, would look really wrong, which actually ended up happening since Dana has such impeccable timing. All she said upon entering was, "Oh…really sorry…didn't know you guys were…I'll just go," and left. I turn exceptionally red and hastily pull myself off off Jesse.

God, how embarrassing is that?

Jesse apologizes and gives me back my ice cream. We sit in silence for a while. Then Jesse says, "So, why did you decide to enter the contest?"

Well, I was still pretty mad at him and all, so I said, "It's really none of your business, but, if you must know, I'm doing it for my own selfish needs."

"I see," Jesse says, "and what do your selfish needs consist of?"

"Oh, everything from designer clothes to expensive perfumes, that sort of stuff," I reply irritably. What? I wasn't just going to start spilling my whole entire life to him, and anyway, it's probably the answer he's looking for. I don't think he has a very high opinion of me, so I just told him what he wants to hear.

"Yes, of course," he says, and then looks at me for a while. "Look, I'm real sorry for barging in on you like I did, I just…I don't actually think that you're ostracized, or anything, I was just kidding…you probably have lots of friends and…uh…I really just came to give you this."

I eye Jesse as he takes out a piece of paper from his pocket and hands it to me. On it is this:

Once a day you must have:

Four or more servings of fruits and vegetables for vitamins and minerals

Four or more servings of whole-grain or enriched bread and cereal for energy

Four of more servings of milk and milk products for calcium

Three or more servings of meat, poultry, fish, eggs, nuts, dried beans and peas for protein

Essential minerals:

Folic acid. Found in kidney beans, leafy green vegetables, peas, and liver.

And on and on it went…

"I just wanted to make sure you were eating right," Jesse says. "And you do have to lay off the junk food, Susannah."

"Why?" I ask, completely puzzled. Is he trying to become a nutritionist, or something?

"Because it isn't good for the baby," he says.

"What baby?" I ask, now really confused.

"Susannah, I know that you're pregnant," is his reply.

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