A/N: this one has been on my laptop for quite a while, and I really have no idea of why I haven't posted it yet. Maybe I'm just forgetful :P Well, here it is - because we all know that no parent in the world can escape THAT question XD

Oh, a quick note to whoever is reading any other fic I'm writing: things got a little messy here these days, so I have no idea of when I'll be able to update any fic that I haven't written out already. I hope I'll get the time soon, but it doesn't really depend on me this time.

...okay, enough with my babblings.

"Och, not bad for a wee lassie," Killigan grinned as he followed the golf ball with his gaze, shielding his eyes from the sun "just try to swing a little wider next time, and – " he trailed off and frowned slightly as he saw Alice had dropped the golf club "what's wrong?"

Alice made a face, looking down at her hands. "It hurts," she complained, holding them up so her father could see how reddened the palms were "see?"

Killigan nodded, taking the seven years old's small hands in his roughened one. "Aye, I see – yer hands are still too soft, it takes time to get used to it…" he said, feeling mildly guilty for not thinking about it before.

"Can we take a break then?" Alice nearly whined. The weather was hot, her arms were tired, her palms hurt and she was hungry.

"Aye, that's enough for today," Killigan said with a shrug, collecting the golf clubs "it was fun, wasn't it?"

Alice simply nodded, sitting on the golf cart. Alright, it was fun for a while, but it could get boring after the first couple of hours or so. Besides, those golf clubs were heavy: her father had insisted for her to use the same golf set he had as a kid, and those old clubs weren't much lighter than normal ones anyway.

Killigan frowned a little. He wasn't either blind or deaf, and it didn't take a genius to see that Alice wasn't nearly as enthusiastic about golf as she wanted to seem. The thought somewhat annoyed him, but he didn't really feel like holding it against her…besides, it was nothing he couldn't fix.

"Ye are really getting better, lassie," he said, sitting on the golf cart himself "I think I could let ye use some of the explosive balls soon enough," he added casually, and he had to hold back a grin as his daughter immediately turned her full attention to him.

"Really?" she said excitedly – just as he expected.

"Aye, really. We could have tried them today already, but since ye're so tired…och, where are ye going?" he asked with a proud smirk as Alice jumped down from the cart before he could even start the engine.

"I'm not that tired," she said eagerly "I can try them out now."

Killigan mentally patted himself on the back while he scratched his chin, pretending to be pondering. "I don't know, lassie, I told yer mother I wouldn't let ye get too tired…"

"But I'm not," she protested, reaching up to grab his sleeve and looking up at him with an almost pleading expression on her little freckled face "and my hands don't hurt much – can I try them out? Please?"

Well, now that was a surprise: Alice never said 'please' for anything, unless she was being sarcastic or Amy told her to. "Well…" Killigan pretended to think for a few more moments before giving her a mischievous grin "aye, if ye're not tired it can't hurt – but ye must not tell yer mother I let ye use explosive stuff. Deal?"

Alice grinned back. "Deal!"

"Now that wasn't too bad, was it?" Killigan said with a laugh as he finally started the engine of the golf cart and began to drive towards the castle.

"It was great!" Alice squirmed excitedly on her seat "and did ye hear the explosions? Boom!"

"Aye, that's the sound an explosion usually does," Killigan snickered "and ye scared that Rhinosomething – who would have guessed that thing could run that fast?"

Alice laughed. "Ye don't like Charlie, uh?"

"Och, I don't like any of those…things yer mother likes to create," he grunted "I'll never get why she likes them so much…"

"Oh," Alice stayed silent for a few moments, a thoughtful and somewhat worried expression on her face as she stared blankly ahead for a few moments. "Dad?" she finally called out.

"What?"

"Where do I come from?"

The golf cart abruptly stopped in front of the castle as Killigan froze, his brain simply refusing to process what his daughter had just asked. "…what?" he almost squawked after a few moments, fervently hoping he hadn't heard well.

Fat chance. "Where do I come from?" Alice asked again, this time sounding a little more impatient.

"Er…" Killigan swallowed – why, why, WHY was she asking that to him? Couldn't she ask Amy? "Well, ye se…uh…" he cleared his throat "I bet yer mother could explain it better," he finally said, unaware of how Alice's slight frown had deepened at his reply – his words seemed to only confirm her worries.

"Was I created with the DNA mixer too?" she asked, looking rather trouble despite her attempts to not let it show up. For some reason, the idea she could have been created just like her mother's living Cuddle Buddies was somewhat scary – then again, if that was the truth, why didn't her father dislike her as he disliked all those other creations? That was confusing to say the least.

And what if her mother created some new creature both her and her father would like better than they liked her? Would her dad treat her just as he treated all her mother's creatures if she wasn't his favourite anymore? She bit her lip, somewhat scared by the thought – and she hated being scared. She was not used to it.

"WHAT?!" Duff Killigan nearly yelled, incredulously looking down at his daughter – he seemed nearly horrified by the thought "what the heck are ye thinking? Och, lassie, ye're nothing like those freaks – ye were not created, ye were born, just like every other kid on this bloody planet!"

Alice blinked. "Oh," she said, suddenly feeling utterly relieved by the thought even though his father's words hadn't explained much…but it was true, she had to come from somewhere else rather than her mother's DNA mixer – after all there was plenty of other kids outside the island, and she was sure none of them had a DNA mixer in their basement or something. "Really?"

"Of course – ye better not say anything so stupid ever again, lassie," Killigan grumbled, feeling mildly guilty for exploding like that – but what the hell, he wouldn't have his kid thinking she was one of Amy's freaks…!

Alice frowned. "Then where do kids come from?" she asked again.

"Er…" he hesitated as he parked the golf cart in front of the castle. Alright, he could always tell her some stuff about storks, cabbage fields or bees and flowers…but he was fairly certain Alice just wouldn't buy any of that crap. "I told ye, ye better ask yer mother – she'll explain everything," he finally said "why don't ye go looking for her now? I bet she's in her lab."

Killigan gave a sigh of relief as Alice nodded and went inside the castle looking for her mother. For a moment he wondered if it had been such a brilliant idea – tact wasn't precisely one of Amy's strong points on certain subjects, especially considering her habit to just start happily, innocently blabbering about things without thinking too much – but he quickly chased the thought from his mind.

No matter what, he definitely wasn't going to be the one to explain Alice where children come from. Amy was certainly more fit than he was to explain such stuff to a child, he tried to convince himself. Besides, he thought, she was a Killigan: it would take more that that to bother her.

Hopefully.

"Oh, here you are, sweetie!" Amy chirped as she saw her daughter getting inside the lab "did you have fun?"

Alice was about to tell her just how cool those explosive golf balls were, but she remembered she had promised her father to keep her mouth shut just in time. "Aye," she simply said, leaning against a table and grabbing a cookie as she watched her mother type something on a large computer – for being genetic engineering lab, there was plenty of food around. "Dad said I got better," she boasted a little, her mouth full. What the heck, she had just handled explosives for the first time – she could at least boast a little after all.

"Oh, I'm sure you did!" Alice made a face as her mother reached to pinch her cheek.

"Mom, no pinching! Ye promised!"

"Sorry, cutie pie," Amy said, not sounding 'sorry' at all "I always forget…could you hand me that DNA sample? Yes, that one."

"Pig DNA?" Alice asked as she watched her putting the sample into the genomic sequencer and typing something else on the keyboard.

"Yup – I'm working on a new Cuddle Buddy!" she exclaimed excitedly "a meerpig!"

"Uh?"

"A mixture between a meerkat and a pig," Amy said as if it was the most natural thing in the world "I bet it would be awfully cute!"

Alice was about to say something about her mother's questionable idea of 'cute', but she wisely decided to just keep her mouth shut. "Have ye ever tried with something different?"

"How different?"

"Well…less cute and more…ye know…" Alice frowned a little while looking for the right word "bad? Much like Nessie, only meaner."

"Oh, yes, I have – and I'll never do that ever again!" she shook her head

Well, that was a surprise – Alice would have never expected her mother to actually say that yes, she had tried once. "Really? How mean?"

"Very mean, and very big," she shrugged a little at the memory "things went out of control. It's just not my thing, sweetie."

The little girl sighed – too bad, now that would have been fun. "I know." There was a brief silence as she watched her mother working in front of the screen. "Mom?" Alice finally called, as if suddenly reminded of the reason why she was there.

"Yes, honey?"

"Where do kids come from?"

Amy blinked, staring at her daughter for a few moments, then a huge smile spread on her face, causing Alice to take a step back. It was never a good sign when her mother smiled like that.

"Ooh, my little girl!" she squealed, grabbing her and giving her a breath-stealing hug "you're growing up so quickly! It seems like yesterday you were –"

"Mom, I can't breathe," Alice protested, squirming in her grasp – how could one of the world's foremost genetists not understand something as basic as a human being's need of oxygen was beyond her.

Amy giggled, releasing her. "I'm sorry sweetie – I just wondered if you'd ever ask," she sighed for some reason unknown to her daughter "oh, one really knows children are growing up when they start asking…"

Alice blinked – what the heck was she talking about? What had it to do with growing up anyway? "Uh?" was all she said as her mother physically pushed her to sit on a chair and handled her some orange juice.

"Here, drink something – it's going to be an important chat, you know," she said excitedly, sitting in front of her with a cookie in her hand, and Alice's grip around the glass tightened.

No, that didn't sound good at all.

Killigan raised his gaze from the newspaper as he heard the door that led to Amy's lab opening. It was about time, he thought: he was starting to get hungry. It was almost lunchtime after all, and Amy had told him she was about to make him haggis that day – she had gotten really good doing that, he mused, almost as much as his grandmother. He turned to ask her if she was done and if they could have lunch already, but he froze as he saw Alice standing in front of him.

…oh, right. He had nearly forgotten what she had been about to ask her mother when she had gotten in the lab, and judging from the expression on her face she hadn't liked at all whatever Amy had told her. He cleared his throat, slightly embarrassed and rather worried for his daughter's mental state. "Are ye…uh…alright, lassie?"

Alice just stared at him without answering for a few moments, then her disturbed expression turned into a disgusted one. "Eeew,"was all she muttered before walking past the couch to get upstairs. Killigan blinked as she left, mentally kicking himself – he should have known Amy wouldn't be able to understand that there was only that much a child could take.

"Oh, don't worry, honey bunny," Amy giggled as she walked behind him and hugged him "it's normal for children to react that way."

"Och, I know," Killigan said – he remembered all too well his reaction as a kid "but was that necessary to tell her…what the heck did ye tell her anyway?"

"Only the basic stuff, of course – she's just a child," Amy said almost defensively, then she shrugged "she'll get over it soon, Duffy, she simply needs time. All kids think it is absolutely disgusting for a while."

"Aye, they do," Killigan said, relaxing a little. It was nothing most children hadn't been through already after all – it was nothing to worry about, she'd get over it. He blinked as his stomach grumbled as if to remind him he needed to eat now "Uh…how about lunch?"

"Everything's ready, sweetums – we can eat now if you want to."

"Och, sure I want – we better tell Alice lunch is ready."

Amy giggled a little. "No need to do so – she said she has no appetite," she said, causing Killigan to blink. When his daughter wasn't hungry, it could only mean the world was about to end.

"No appetite? Alice? Och, lass, what in the world did ye tell her?!"

"I told you, nothing nasty – children are just easy to impress."

Killigan was about to protest and say that Alice was anything but easy to impress, but he changed his mind – Amy still failed to realize her daughter was about as sensitive as a rhino most times. "We better leave her something if she gets hungry later," he just said.

"Oh, don't worry, I'll bake a mouth-watering pie later – she just won't be able to resist!"

"Chocolate pie?"

"Chocolate pie."

"Then ye better bake two of those, lass, or there won't be much left for her," Killigan said, causing Amy to chuckle.

"Anything for my pookie bear," she said, hugging him tighter, completely deaf to his protests and his attempts to squirm away from her bone-breaking grasp.