A/N: This chapter probably has one of my favorite scenes in it that I've written for this story yet. Ya'll enjoy! Not sure when the next chapter will be--I'm not promising anything for a couple weeks at least, the chapter isn't past planning and my weekends are booked for a couple weeks. Until next time--ya'll are the best--PCGirl.
Natalie was surprised when she got off the elevator that there was no guard standing outside the penthouse. She was even more surprised that the key she'd slipped off her mom's key chain still fit the lock—didn't people know they were supposed to change the locks when they moved in?
But then Lee Ramsey seemed to be one that could keep his secrets hidden in plain sight. As she opened the door she noticed that the CSU team hadn't been here yet—and she wondered what trouble they could be having with the search warrant.
She wondered more though why she was here in the first place—to find some sort of closure as to why he kidnapped her in the first place? To find Marty locked up in some room so she could get to her before he got word to a goon to move her to a new location? Or maybe it was to find some sort of clue as to who his mystery woman was.
At hearing a sound on the stairs she looked up to see the third question answered—though she'd been almost positive before, it was the only answer that made sense.
"Hello, Caitlyn. It's nice to finally meet you."
"How did you know my name? Who are you?" she asked as she slowly made her way down the steps.
"Through a mutual friend—John McBain. When he thought you died he put you on a pedestal, one that was nearly impossible for me or anyone else to tip over," she said, thinking of all the time she waited for him to finally move on from Caitlyn, only then to have to fight for him against the living with Evangeline.
"You know nothing about what happened to us."
"I know you were shot by an intruder—an intruder that later turned out to be a serial killer he'd been trying to lure out into the open. When Ramsey rescued you was it your idea or his to let John think you were dead?"
"He was keeping me safe from the person that tried to kill John and I."
"Fine—whatever you say," said Natalie as she walked around the room, her arms folded at her chest. "Do you know how he was after you died? He went through the motions, no happiness, no relationships beyond work ones. How he wouldn't allow anything physical beyond a romp in the sack because he was worried for their safety? Does that mean anything to you?"
"I'm sorry that happened to him."
"But not sorry enough to tell him the truth."
"He'll understand—he'll forgive me."
Natalie laughed loud at that comment, "The man you knew and the father of my child are two different people—yours died when you decided to love another man more than him. A man who is now sitting in a jail cell and will be there for a very long time."
John didn't know why Natalie had come here, but seeing her car in the parking lot had confirmed what the GPS tracker in her car had said, she'd come to Ramsey's penthouse for something and he was curious as to what it was.
He hadn't been surprised that Natalie had been asleep the night before when he'd finally made it back to Llanview and tried to see her, but he was this morning when he'd gone by Llanfair to see her and her mom had said she'd left shortly before he arrived, saying she had an errand to run. It was then he was glad he'd never taken out the GPS tracker he'd installed years ago.
John could hear Natalie's voice when he stepped off the elevator—it was elevated and she was letting someone know her exact opinion of them. He heard his name being mentioned also, but as to who the other person in the room was he couldn't make it out. The voice was soft and muffled behind the closed door. He thought for a moment about drawing his weapon, but something told him it wasn't necessary—with the way Natalie was talking he was sure the other person wasn't armed.
As he reached the door he realized it wasn't closed all the way so he quietly pushed it open with his foot and stepped into the foyer of the penthouse. Natalie had her back to him and he couldn't quiet see the other person so he stepped all the way into the room, his voice getting caught in his throat at the sight of Caitlyn.
"John," she said softly, their eyes connecting and he felt his heart starting to race.
Natalie turned and looked at him—she knew he'd figure out where she was, but had been hoping she'd find him first—give him some notice before he came face to face with his past, "I—I wasn't sure who it was, but I knew Ramsey had a female living here with him—she visited him one night."
"I went by Llanfair—we need to talk about last night," said John to Natalie, though his eyes were still focused on Caitlyn standing there looking back at him.
"I told you and Bo everything that I knew. I'm not sure what else there is to tell, John," she said as she began to walk behind him. "You know what—I'm just going to let you two catch up—if I do remember anything else though I'll give you a call."
At hearing the tone in her voice he broke out of his trance and turned to look at her—she was hurt again and he was to blame, "Don't go—ok? Will you just wait out in the hallway, it won't take long," he said, but she didn't say anything just kept walking out of it. John kept his eye on the door until it was shut—he'd already chased after Natalie once today, he knew she wouldn't wait in the hallway like he said, so when this was done he'd chase after her again.
He turned back and took the sight of Caitlyn in—she looked exactly the same, her hair was short and she had on a simple sweater, jeans, and Sketcher's on, what he always thought of as her uniform on the weekends. There was so much he had to say to her, and he honestly had no clue where to start. Years ago—before Natalie—he'd have taken her in his arms and thanked God he'd been wrong, that she hadn't died. But now—now with having come so close to losing Natalie, he was at a loss of what to say. "Did you even know Kathryn had died?" he asked, his voice harsh—harsher than even he'd expected it to be.
Caitlyn nodded, taken off guard slightly by John's voice—he'd changed, she saw that the second he walked in the door, and she knew she was a major part of that, "Lee told me. We were at the cemetary when they laid her to rest—I saw you there."
"You didn't feel it was in your sister's interest—better yet your parent's interest—to show yourself then? Help them at least think they'd only lost one of their children and not both?" he asked again, an anger he wasn't ready for bubbling up to the surface.
"Lee said it wasn't safe—that the man that tried to kill me was still on the loose."
"The man was already dead at that point and he knew it. Anyways—I could have protected you too, Caitlyn. You know that was part of what I was promising to you, our families, and God—to protect you. But I guess you didn't care—did you even really love me or was it always Ramsey you really wanted?"
"Don't say that—you know how I felt for you," she said, walking closer to him.
"How can I know for sure now? I mourned you for five years, Cait. Five years I let myself mourn you—believe that I couldn't protect you from a home invasion. Then I learn that it wasn't a home invasion, but a sociopath that I taunted. And now you are here—alive this whole time and not caring what I, or your family believed."
"Lee said you wouldn't understand—that you would be selfish about all of this when it finally came out," she said, a pout forming on her face as she crossed her arms and John thought she looked like a bratty child at the moment.
A roar of laughter came out of his mouth, "No, sweetheart—I'm not being selfish. What I am is angry at myself—angry that I've wasted almost a decade of my life mourning someone that was never dead.
"I almost died—did you know that? I finally found peace with my father's death, found the true woman I was supposed to be with, and then I nearly died that same exact night in a horrible crash. And what did I do when she realized I was alive? I pushed her away—caused her to be someone else that neither of us recognized or could stand to be around.
"Whatever we had between us before—it died the night you got shot and then decided to stay with Ramsey—I'm just sorry I never knew it until now," he said as he took one last look at Caitlyn before walking out the door—ignoring her pleas for him to stay, for them to talk.
He wouldn't waste anymore time on her—he'd done enough of it already—he had to go find the other woman he'd wasted too much time pushing away, hoping that he hadn't screwed it up the night before and it wasn't too late to make things right for them.
Natalie walked into Foxy Roxy's and plopped herself down in the chair, not saying anything when she heard Roxy holler from the back storage room. She wasn't sure why she'd come here—she could have just as easily gone back and locked herself in Llanfair. At hearing Roxy's heels click across the floor she looked up and gave a half smile, "Hey Rox."
"Hey dollface—why the long face?" asked Roxy as she sat down next to Natalie and very motherly put her arm around the girl she'd raised. That was all it took for Natalie's hormones to get the best of her and she started to cry.
Natalie pulled out of Roxy's hold and covered her face, "I've lost him, Roxy."
"Him who? Is something wrong with the baby? Did that whack job do something to hurt my grandchild?" asked Roxy as she jumped up and got in front of Natalie's seat.
"No, she's fine," said with a half-laugh, finally admitting what John said before that she was carrying their daughter. "Marty Saybrooke is alive—I saw her the first day I was taken hostage, and just now I just left John with a very much alive Caitlyn Fitzgerald. I can't win for losing today."
"Ok, so the guy has two chicks from his past come back from the dead—so what?"
"It's hard enough to compete with dead demons, how are we supposed to compete with live ones?" asked Natalie as she looked up at Roxy.
"Don't you get it—there aren't any demons now—there's just you and his child. You aren't competing against anyone else—you'll see, Johnny Mac knows where his heart is, and baby it's been with you for awhile."
"You're probably right when it comes to Caitlyn—but what about Marty? The only reason this baby was even conceived was because he needed comfort over Marty's death."
"That grandbaby of mine was conceived because you two are meant to be together."
"I haven't told him she's alive yet—but I know him—he'll leave to go find her."
"But he'll come back to you—he always does."
John walked quickly through Angel Square—his first instinct was she'd gone back to Llanfair, but he then figured that was wrong. She'd left out of the Penthouse and not waited like he'd asked her to. He didn't know why she ran—or why the night before she found comfort in Jared's arms and had him take her home instead of John.
Watching her walk out of Foxy Roxy's his instinct that she'd gone there was right and he jogged towards her, "Natalie." At hearing his voice she seemed to walk faster and he picked up his pace until he was just feet away from her, "Hey—stop."
Natalie turned and she knew immediately that the signs of her crying spat with Roxy were still evident, "I've got to get to BE, John. There's a lot of stuff that needs to be taken care of, and I—I just have to go."
John looked at her—the thought that the reason she was running from him was that Ramsey had touched her and his blood began to boil at the thought, "Did he touch you?"
"What? Ramsey? No—not once, he wasn't interested in me for that," she said as she shook her head.
"Why are you running from me? We were getting back to something, Natalie—what changed while he had you in that room?"
Natalie hadn't wanted to tell him like this, hadn't wanted to see her dreams shattered on the sidewalk, "Marty."
John shook his head in confusion, "Marty? What does she have to do with this?"
"She's alive—she was in the room the first day with me until I went to sleep that night—when I woke up her and the bed she was sleeping in were gone. I have no clue where he took her—but I know you, you'll find her," she said. "I'm not making you chose John—I mean we were only reconnecting because of the baby, and the baby never would have happened if she hadn't 'died' in the first place."
John watched her turn and walk away—his feet frozen by the words she'd just told him—it was more than Marty just being alive that stunned him—it was Natalie's brutal honesty that she believed he only wanted her because of their child. As he began to race after her he heard screeching tires and then crushing metal that caused him to stop and turn his head. When he looked back to where Natalie had been he finally saw the BE Towncar that had been waiting for her up the street. She was already in it and pulling away from the curb—and as she passed him he knew what he'd been fighting for to have with her before was now amplified as to what he would have to prove to her now.