A/N- Alright! Chapter Two! Honestly, I didn't think I'd get this far. XDDDD
Here's a special thanks to all my reviewers! I'm a person of few words, but I mean them sincerely. :D
Invader Zan- LOL Thank you so much! I'm absolutely thrilled you like it so much!
Alohilani- I can't thank you enough for the encouragement. :D
Invader Johnny- LOL Me too. I hope you enjoy this chapter!
rejectsuperstar- OMG, I'm so glad you think so! Thank you so much!
Kei Lawliet- Thank you so much! I'll try to get updates out as soon as I can. :D
teenytinyturtle5- Thank you! I'll definitely continue if everyone continues to like it!
Disclaimer- *checks* Nope, still own nothing. :D
Chapter Two: Doom's Day Gone Wrong
Dib ran into GIR about ten minutes into his infiltration of Zim's base.
The little robot was quietly watching seven different shows while shoving a taco into his mouth, pulled from a Krazy Taco bag. The greasy sack had about a dozen more inside and was full to bursting point. Spicy meat leaked from the shell of the one GIR was munching on currently and dripped down his metal lips and chin to plop onto the floor, unnoticed. Periodically, he would stop eating long enough to giggle and point at one of the screens, his huge eyes shining a florescent cyan, signaling his brain wasn't all there at the moment.
From past experiences, Dib knew GIR would refrain from attacking him while his eyes were blue, and he took this as an opportunity to find out where Zim was hiding. He slowly made his way over to where the robot was sitting.
"Uh…Zim's robot-thing?" Dib said, tapping lightly on the robot's shoulder to attract his attention.
"OH HI, BIIIIIIIIG-HEADED KID! I GOTZ ME SOME TACOS!" the SIR unit screeched jumping excitedly to his feet and turning to face the human.
"That's great, but could you tell me where your master is?" Dib asked, leaning down to look at GIR, acting as innocently as possible. "And my head's not big!"
"Mastah is floatin' in space in a PURPLE BANANA! Imma gaurdin' the house for him! I hope he forgets to come back for me so I can ASPLODE!" GIR squealed happily, bursting into a fit of hysterical giggles. The thought of expolding seemed to excite him.
"Explode? What do you mean explode? Is that Zim's plan!?" Dib demanded, taking the little robot by the shoulders and shaking him roughly as if the information would fall out of him like loose change. (Actually, he thought he could hear coins rattling around in the robot's head.)
GIR nodded his head with vigor, grinning hugely as if he'd just won a lifetime supply of Suck Monkeys.
The human quickly released his grip on GIR and jumped to his feet.
"I've got to stop him!" he cried. He turned back to the robot who had fallen over sideways as if the Dib's hands had been the only thing holding him up, but was soon giggling and rolling in the taco grease and fillings strewn on the floor.
"Hey, little robot! How do you get to the, uh…Purple Banana?" Dib asked, but GIR was unresponsive, still rolling. "Uh…little robot?"
The SIR unit now sat upright, but the only reply Dib received was, "TACOS!" as GIR waved a handful of taco meat in the air. Dib tried, with much effort, to keep his patience with the crazy robot, but he was getting desperate as his time to reach Zim slowly ticked away.
He didn't know how he could possibly forgive himself if Zim's plan succeeded. And what would he do if Earth was destroyed? He didn't think his arch enemy would kindly offer him a spare spaceship or a place to stay. There was no room for compassion in Zim's PAK, he was sure.
"Please, evil robot-thingy! You have to tell me how to get to the Purple Banana!" he shouted, throwing his hands up in exasperation.
As if he was going out of his way to annoy the human, GIR simply smiled with his tongue sticking out, but eventually he said,
"Oooooonly if you dance with meeeeeeee!"
Dib felt his heart drop into his stomach, knowing really didn't have time to play along with the robot's games, but what else was he going to do?
Heaving an enormous sigh, he started to move in a sad excuse for a dance as GIR sang a song for him consisting of the words "doo" and "dee". The tiny robot seemed absolutely thrilled as he watched Dib jig pathetically, happily clapping his metal hands together and running in circles as he sang.
"Okay!" GIR said after a few more seconds of dancing around, satisfied at last, "The Purple Banana is riiiiiiiiiiight up there!"
The SIR unit was pointing towards a lilac-tinted glass chute down the next hallway. A pipe, much too small for any human (or alien) to fit through was coming out of the top of the contraption.
Must be some kind of teleporter, Dib guessed, seeing the pipe problem. He looked back behind him to see GIR was absorbed in his TV shows again, devouring his bulging bag of tacos as if nothing had happened.
"Thanks, robot!" he said gratefully.
"SHHH!" GIR scolded, "The Scary Monkey is on."
Dib assumed that meant, 'no problem' in GIR-speak and sprinted off towards the chute.
~****~
"Wow, it really does kind of look a purple banana…" Dib mused, looking out the window.
The space base he'd been transported to, which was basically a huge spacecraft looming above the Earth, was in the shape of a crescent moon and a deep plum color. He recognized it almost immediately, remembering when Zim had held him captive here once before and Gaz had had to save him. Well, actually, she'd just wanted pizza.
What troubled him though was he could have sworn the control room had been flooded with purple goo and Zim had cut off all the teleporter connections. Then again, when he thought about it, Zim had been great at fixing up his base when it was damaged. This place couldn't have been too different.
His thoughts were suddenly interrupted by Zim's unmistakable harsh laugh, coming from somewhere nearby. He could just hear the surety of victory the Irken felt and it made him furious.
That alien wouldn't know what hit him when he wrecked his plans for global conquest!
Dib fingered the remaining Exploding Bead in his pocket, an idea forming in his head. Maybe he could blow up the controls and cause the system to error. That way, Zim wouldn't be able to go through with his evil scheme and have to surrender victory to him. Plus, if the alien had his back to him at least, he could throw the bead without being noticed, successfully executing his plan without having to engage in any fighting. Of course, there would be a fight afterwards because Zim wasn't very good at accepting loss, but that was beside the point.
It seemed like a foolproof plan; so foolproof, Dib found himself to be grinning with the same feeling of assured victory as his enemy was laughing with.
He followed the sound of the maniacal cackling, and soon found himself in the control room where Zim was typing at an enormous console curving around the perimeter of the room. The Irken has his back turned to Dib, but the human quickly took care of that by chucking the last Exploding Bead at the keyboard.
It would have been effective in getting Zim's attention AND destroying the console had it not missed by a yard, but the fact was, the tiny detonator only managed to hit a trashcan, the explosion spewing trash and plastic everywhere. Zim whirled around, antennas straight up and alert before they lowered a good three inches in obvious hostility. His eyes narrowed, a dangerous red fire blazing in them.
"How did I miss? Wow, I've got bad aim!" Dib breathed in disbelieve, shocked at his own athletic deficiency. He found he didn't have time to dwell on his aiming skills though as he looked up to see Zim growling furiously at him, his tactile members twitching with rage, magenta eyes glaring holes into his face. He swiftly regained his heroic composure shouting, "I mean…ZIM! GIVE UP AND FACE DEFEAT!"
By the look on the Irken's face, he wasn't going to give up nearly that easily.
"YOU!" the alien seethed, "You, horrible, meddlesome, troublemaking, HYUUUMAN!"
The small invader took a fighting stance and his PAK opened up, sprouting metal limbs. He began to advance toward the human, his expression livid. Dib took that as his cue to start running for his life, but on his spider-legs, Zim was much faster than he was on foot and caught up with him within seconds. He was soon pinned down like an insect under a shoe by the tip of one of the metal appendages.
"How did you get here? How did you get out of the Skool?" Zim demanded loudly. He pushed the end of his spider-leg into Dib's back to further prove how irritated he was by the Earthling's presence.
"AHH! Ouch, quit it!" Dib yelped, but the tip only dug deeper into his spine, "I tricked Ms. Bitters so I could…OW!...get into your base and stop you! And your loser robot let me in--GAH! Ow!" He forced the words out through gritted teeth, but said them with confidence, refusing to let Zim think he'd given up.
The metal limb gave one last jab to his back, digging in extra deep before his wrists and ankles were pinned down instead. Cuffs came out of the aluminum tips and Zim forced Dib's arms behind his back and his legs together, binding his hands and feet. Instead of chains however, there was a strange blue energy fizzling between the cuffs. Chains or no chains though, there was no way Dib could escape, fight Zim, or really do anything requiring the use of his arms and legs.
He lay helplessly on the floor as Zim's PAK legs shrunk back into their metal casing, lowering the alien onto the ground who was still frowning at him.
"Good try, Dib, but your interferences will NOT, uh…INTERFERE with my ingenious plan, to DESTROY the humans!" Zim told the bound teenager. He suddenly grinned evilly, looking out the window at the Earth, imagining what it would look like when it was blown to smithereens, shrapnel flung to the far corners of the universe.
"I'll still stop you, Zim!" Dib insisted, pulling against the cuffs, but only managing to roll over on to his back which turned out to be more uncomfortable than on his stomach.
Zim merely watched him struggle with amusement.
"HA! Foolish human! You will not stop me this time, Dib-worm! Not when I'm so close to putting my master plan into action. Irk will soon name the Amazing Zim the greatest invader to ever live for conquering the pitiful planet Earth in just a few days," he boasted.
"Days? You've been here for months!"
"SILENCE!" Zim screeched. He turned back to the console, tapping at a few keys, "Now, Dib-stink, watch as your planet is blown to pieces at the hands of my…DOOM'S DAY BEE!"
There was a moment of dead silence as Dib struggled to make sure he'd heard that right.
"A…a Doom's Day Bee?" he asked incredulously.
Zim cocked a nonexistent eyebrow, grinning widely at the human who had momentarily ceased squirming around in his attempt to rid himself of his metal hindrances, listening to see if the Irken was serious.
"The name strikes FEAR into your pathetic human heart, no?"
Dib's eyes shifted from side to side as he searched for an answer.
"Um, no, not really. The fact that it's a giant bomb does, but…"
Zim snarled, left antenna twitching with annoyance at the lack of terror in the human. (How dare he not cower at his amazing invention!)
"Well, you'll learn to cringe at the very mention of it when your FILTHY dirt-ball of a planet is smashed to microscopic bits! PREPARE for the launching!"
Even if the name hadn't had the effect Zim had desired, the threat to the Earth was very real to Dib and his eyes widened. He thrashed, frantically trying to somehow rid himself of his bonds, but with no avail. No, no, NO! he screamed in his mind, panic taking over and forming beads of sweat at his temples.
Zim's claw was slowly lowering towards the button that would end life on Earth permanently, when he suddenly jerked his hand away from the keyboard, bringing it up to smack his forehead instead.
"Gah! I forgot all about GIR!" he shouted in frustration. "I'll have to get him before I release the Bee…"
He stomped out of the control room, scowling with his shoulders hunched and angled forward, hands balled into fists.
There was a whooshing sound as Zim was transported back to his base, and then silence. Dib simply laid still on the floor, physically drained from all his struggling and dreading the moment when Zim would return; the time otherwise known as, the end for all life on Earth. He flexed his wrists again, but it was no use. He wasn't getting out of this one and he knew it.
He'd lost.
When Zim returned a few minutes later, GIR skipping along behind him with his bag of tacos, he was smirking victoriously to himself.
"And now, the REAL launching of the Bee!" he announced when he reached the computer controls. This go round, he wasted no time on dramatic effect and simply punched the button, sealing the Earth's doom.
Dib struggled into a kneeling position, crawling feebly in a hopeless attempt to reach the keyboard. "NOOO!" he cried, grunting and struggling harder, despite the fatigue.
Zim just laughed, watching the countdown clock projected on the enormous window that doubled as a computer screen excitedly as it ticked away the seconds.
5…4…3
"TACOS!!"
GIR suddenly shoved a taco from his bag in Zim's face, so close it was nearly touching his meat-sensitive skin. The Irken quickly tried to back away from the allergy-inducing Mexican takeout.
"GIR, GET THAT FILTH AWAY FROM ME!" he cried, but his robot minion wasn't listening as he continued to wave the taco in his master's face, oblivious to Zim's obvious rage.
Zim was backed into the keyboard and the edge caught him behind his knees, causing him to momentarily lose his balance, elbowing a few keys as he fell over the console. The clock had reached 1 by this point, but the moment Zim accidentally pressed the buttons, the countdown stopped and the screen changed to read, TARGET RESET. An automated voice announced this, echoing loudly in the now silent control room.
Everyone looked up at the monitor, gaping in shock; all except GIR, anyway, who shouted, 'Yay!' Zim and Dib on the other hand waited to see where the new target had been assigned, holding their breath in anticipation.
When the coordinates were displayed, it was Zim's turn to be horrified. His antennas slowly lowered until they were flat against his head when he saw the screen read--TARGET: IRKEN MASSIVE.
A/N- BWAHAHAH! Did I ever mention how fun being evil is?
I do love using those wonderful little cliffhangers…
Anyway, there's a horrible feeling that this chapter wasn't so great buzzing in my head. I really hope I'm wrong.