Golden Dusk
It would even be funny, if it wasn't so painful. You can almost feel him, touch him, hear him again, but there's this blank wall separating you both. You look around, eyes wet with tears he didn't see you cry – that you wouldn't have cried if you could see him and touch him.
This is home, they say, but it is wrong. It's much like everything you'd ever dream of before he came into your life. And that was a whole life before now: nothing is the same, and it will never be. Things don't taste as they used to, they don't feel like they used to, they don't smell like the used to. Your whole existence was changed by the touch of his hand and there's no turning back.
You walked away only after he had already left.
If he could do it, you'd find a way to do it too.
(Does that even make sense, Rose? He's hundreds of years older than you, galaxies wiser, he's lived much more than you'll ever live in your short lifespan. But he trusted you – above anything else; he told The Beast that much - , and you want to be as much like him as you can, so you decide to find a way. You're so very valiant Miss Tyler, and such a child. Lost in battle, so soon.)
You walk your everyday path, and every black leather jacket, every stripped suit, every Converse is like rubbing sand into a wound – you hate that Patrick Dempsey bloke for having that cursed hair, although it's not nearly as awesome as his was. Is. It's impossible to forget him, or pretend those days never were. It was unbearable to think they might never come back. So you walk into Torchwood, and becomes an ally of your old enemy – in this new place, everything is different. They are not the same.
You get used to it, the zeppelins in the sky, the earplugs, and Windows .7, to your happily remarried mother, and the man that would have been your father in a different timeline. Only Mickey remains the same old friend, even if he's much older than he used to be now. A soldier, a brave fighter in pursuit of justice; he says you did this, but you both know it's a lie. The Doctor did it, and he's no longer there.
He showed you that you could change the world, make a difference.
And you try to do it in your every step.
(You don't know how deeply he misses you, your smell and the sound of your voice. He thinks about you every day and every night as well. You're in his dreams and nightmares, you that killed him through love, that birth him through faith. There are other hands to be hold, but he longs for yours. He accepts that you can't be back, but that doesn't stop him from missing you every second. The brave, proud, stubborn, sweet and compassionate Miss Rose Tyler.)
The world is good, but it is wrong, and you can't fix it.
The only thing you could do was finding a way back.
So you do it.
AN: I'm sorry if there are too many mistakes - it's 3 AM and I couldn't sleep until I wrote this.
Oh, and I'm thrilled to find out my 100th entry will be about my truest, deepest OTP - and yet my very first shot at it. So, do cheer with me, or tell me I should be ashamed to publish such thing! =D