-Twenty-Five Days-

A Psychonauts Christmas Fanfic by Digitaldreamer

Day Twenty-One: The Grinch Who Didn't Steal Christmas

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Wow, thanks for all the reviews last chapter, guys. Glad you're enjoying the fic! Worry not, it will be done in time for Christmas, I promise!

So right...when you read this chapter, try to find yourself a copy of the old "You're a Mean One, Mister Grinch" song. If you don't have it, look it up on Google, I gaurantee you can find a stream. If not, hey, just hum it.

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Though a bustling place during the day, the mall was eerily quiet at night. Metal gates were drawn over the doorways of stores and restaurants, shining in the moonlight that streamed down from skylights. Christmas lights hung everywhere, though they were slightly depressing to look at when they were off. Displays of Santa, his elves, and his reindeer seemed rather lonely without shoppers around to spare them glances as they rushed to get shopping done.

All was quiet and still. Then, quite suddenly, there was a barely audioable squeaking noise. This lasted for a few seconds, then a small "pop" was heard.

Then, like an angel of death, a person clad in red and white with a Grinch mask pulled over their face lowered down from a hole in the skylight. The person alighted upon the ground with ease, then snapped off the rope they had used to come down and glanced around.

"Hm...these will do." The person behind the mask murmured, their voice slightly muffled. He (or was it a she?) gave a soft chuckle and began making their way towards the stores, humming as he/she did so.

"You're a mean one, Mister Grinch! You really are a heel. You're as cuddly as a cactus, you're as slimy as an eel-"

"You know," A voice suddenly spoke. "If you're that tone deaf, you really shouldn't be singing, even if a good portion of that song is true."

The person in the Grinch mask froze. "Who's there!?"

The lights flipped on to reveal Raz, Sasha, and Milla standing before the Christmas tree.

"Reports of various burglaries and attacks made on various citizens have been made over the past few days. Though little to no evidence has been left, few have claimed to have seen the mysterious culprit clad in a Grinch costume." Sasha stated.

"However, psychic investigation has revealed psychic frequencies all over the place...and your aura seems to match them all perfectly, darling." Milla declared, hands on her hips.

"For a psychic criminal you don't seem to have any idea what you're doing. You may as well have left a great, big, bright neon sign saying you did it!" Raz snorted.

The one in the Grinch costume watched them for a moment. Then they started laughing. "Oh, Razputin, you have no idea..."

Raz's brow furrowed. "How do you know my name?" He asked.

The Grinch continued to cackle. "None of you have any idea at all, do you?"

Sasha frowned. "What are you talking about?"

The Grinch giggled for another moment, then spoke. "Don't you get it? This is a trap. I knew if I acted out, you three would be the only agents Truman could send at this time. I left clues, knowing full well how easily they could be tracked. I wanted you to come here, all for one reason..."I'm going to kill you here, do you understand me!? KILL YOU, AHAHAHA!"

Sasha stared at the costumed criminal for a moment. "You know, death threats truly stopped being frightening to me quite awhile ago."

"Same here, darling." Milla said with a yawn.

"Really? I think they're kind of entertaining, the way they cackle and rant on and on. They don't even notice you're having a conversation right in front of them." Raz drawled nonchalantly.

"SILENCE!" The Grinch screamed again. "I'm going to kill you! Kill you all! You will all beg for mercy before I'm done! And once you're gone, I'll go on to your precious agency, do you hear me!?"

"Oh please." Raz snorted, rolling his eyes. "The whole monologuing thing? So isn't working with the costume."

The Grinch let out a scream of rage. "You think it's funny, do you!? Well then, taste this!" With that, the costume-clad criminal let forth an explosion of bright green Psi-blasts.

Raz's eyes widened. "Whoa!" He, Sasha, and Milla scattered as the blinding neon blasts ricocheted this way and that way through the mall, smashing windows and shattering displays.

Raz knocked over a light-up reindeer as he skidded through fake snow, eyes narrowed as he glanced around for his opponant. "Where is he?" He muttered. He then let out a shout as he was hit with a boot from behind, sending him flying into a wall.

"Oooohh...you're a monster, Mister Grinch!" The one in the costume sang, a confusion gernade appearing in hand. The costume-glad criminal then pulled off the period and tossed it in Milla's direction, letting out a giggle as it exploded. "Your heart's an empty hooooole!"

"Oh...wow...disco lights..." Milla mumbled as she stumbled around in a daze.

"Your brain's full of spiders," The criminal continued to sing as they avoided a blast from Sasha, then ducked under Razputin's psychic fist. "You've got garlic in your soul! Mister Griiiiiiiinch!" The grinch then spun around and hit them with two psi-blasts, sending the boys slamming into each other.

"Ow..." Raz groaned as Sasha stumbled to his feet, his sunglasses askew.

The Grinch let out a cackle, preparing yet another blast to finish them off. "I wouldn't-- EEEEEEEEEK!" The next line of the song was cut off with a girly scream when Milla suddenly came dropping from the sky. The Brazilian Psychonaut's face was one of determination as she sent a swift kick into the Grinch's stomach, then snatched off the mask.

"That's what you get for—" Milla paused, eyes widening. "Oh my gosh..."

"Tessie!?" Raz sputtered, his eyes wide.

Indeed, with the mask gone, the one in the costume proved to be none other than Tessie, her pink hair pulled back into a bun, her ordinarily grinning face twisted into a look of rage.

"Wha...what!?" She sputtered.

"...I wouldn't touch you with a thirty-nine and a half foot pole." Sasha finished the line "the Grinch" had been about to say almost unconsciously.

Tessie's eyes narrowed. "Shut up!" She snapped. "Yes, it's me! I told you I would be back, didn't I!?"

"Well, yeah, sure, but we were also pretty sure it was an empty threat." Raz said.

Tessie shook with rage. "Well, it wasn't! I'm back, and now I'm going to make you pay!" She declared.

"Oh really?" Sasha asked, quirking an eyebrow.

"Yes, really!" The pink-haired girl hissed. "Do you have any idea how hard it was to sneak into Psychonauts Headquarters and hack into my file!? It was just my luck that it happened to be Christmastime! Truman was so busy, he hardly even noticed that the one who volunteered to be the head of the decorating committee was a face he had never seen before! I hate Christmas, but it was going to all be worth it! I was going to take down the agency all by my lonesome from the inside! FROM THE INSIDE!"

"Uh huh. And I bet you would have gotten away with it too if it weren't for us meddling kids, right?" Raz asked with a grin.

Tessie let out a sound of outrage, which only made Raz grin more.

"So let me get this straight. I'm missing Christmas with my girlfriend all for this?" Raz continued, his eyes narrowing dangerously.

"Oh, you'll be missing more than Christmas, Razputin. I'm going to--"

"Look, I really don't care how you're going to kill me or whatever." Raz stated, cutting her off. "To put it simply, I have better things to do...so let's preform the nutcracker, shall we?" He said, getting back into an attack position.

Tessie let out another shriek and sent forth another explosion of Psi-blasts, the bursts of green flying this way and that, taking out sections of the tree and frying strands of lights.

By the time the energy finally cleared, the Psychonauts were gone. Tessie's eyes widened and she glanced around nervously, breathing heavily. "Where did they-- GAH!" She let out a shriek as a bright crimson Psi-blast suddenly slammed into her, sending her flying in the air.

"Oooh, you're a vile one, Mister Grinch!" Raz sang, a mischievous grin coming to his face.

Tessie let out a yelp as she hit the floor and skidded across it. She finally came to a stop and glanced up to see Sasha standing there. She let out a low growl and stumbled back, preparing a blast, but Sasha was quicker. A pale blue psi-blast sent her flying across the room with another shriek.

"Come on Sasha, next line!" Raz prodded.

Sasha rolled his eyes. "You have termites in your smile." He sang dully.

Milla let out a giggle as Tessie stumbled to her feet before her, the pink-haired girls eyes widening as she recognized the smoking, sickening green yellow object in the Brazilian Psychonauts hand.

"Sorry, darling..." Milla plucked the period off of the question mark. "But you have all the tender sweetness of a seasick crocodile, Miiiiiiister Griiiiiinch!" At this she tossed the confusion grenade and stepped back just in time to avoid the cloud of green-yellow gas that exploded forth.

Tessie coughed and hacked as she stumbled round in a daze, her green eyes glazed over. "What...what...no...this isn't...no..." She moaned. "I can't..." The pink-haired girl clutched at her head, groaning.

By the time her vision had cleared, Raz, Sasha, and Milla were standing triumphantly before her.

"Tessie, if that is your real name, you are hereby under arrest for breaking and entering, assault, and plenty of other things I cannot be bothered to list at the moment." Sasha declared.

Tessie let out a snarl. "Why you--"

"You have the right to remain silent, darling. Anything you say in court can and will be used against you." Milla said cheerfully.

"YOU!" Tessie roared, preparing another Psi-blast.

"Here, let me help you with the whole 'remaining silent' deal." Raz smirked, pulling back his fist as orange psychic energy began to form.

Tessie's eyes widened, feeling a tinge of fear. "Oh..."

"Well, Tessie, as the song goes..." Raz began lazily. "Given the choice between the two of you..."

"I'd take the sea-sick crocodile!" All three psychics sang.

With that, Raz's psychic fist connected with Tessie, and the pink-haired grinch knew no more.

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To Be Continued...