Galehus

Part 4

"Norge! Norge~?"

At the moment, Denmark was rather confused. Never the best state for him to be in, since he had a tendency to act even more impulsive and reckless when he wasn't entirely sure what was going on. Something that way too many people had been on the wrong end of...

Anyway, so Denmark was rather confused. Because Norway should be home right now; he didn't have any sort of important meetings today, he hadn't been planning on visiting any of the other nations... (And Denmark did not consider stealing—borrowing someone's organizer and writing down their entire schedule for the next few months to be stalking, no matter what the other nations said; it was called being a good friend. Good friends knew where there friend was at all times, after all.)

Besides, even if he hadn't borrowed Norway's organizer, he'd still know that the other nation was home, since the light was on in his office. And Norway wasn't the type to leave a light on in his home unless he was using it at that exact moment.

Which could mean one of two things.

One: Norway may not be able to hear him. Even though he'd been ringing the doorbell and pounding on the door and shouting and calling his cell phone for the past twenty-eight minutes. Making this rather unlikely, since at least one of those should have worked. It wasn't like Norway was deaf or anything.

Or two: Something may have happened to Norge. He may have slipped and fallen and knocked his head against his desk. He could be lying unconscious on the floor in his office at this very moment!

Denmark's eyes widened in horror at this thought. Fuck! What was he doing just standing here like an idiot? Norge was in trouble!

And at that thought, he immediately turned around and bent over to pick up the favourite battle axe that he basically carried everywhere he went. After all, that battle axe that had seen him through a lot. Including his old Viking days.

Ah, those had really been the days—raiding England, France, Spain, Estonia... And his trusty axe had been with him through it all.

And now, it was going to see battle once more.

"Don't worry, Norge! I'm coming to save you!"

Norway's front door never stood a chance.

And it was only after he'd chopped through the innocent, defenceless door that he had the sudden thought 'Norge probably isn't gonna be happy about this'.

"Bróðir is not going to be happy about that."

Denmark jumped, startled by the sudden echoing of his thoughts, and then whirled around to see Iceland standing in the doorway to the kitchen, can of Coca-Cola in one hand, puffin resting on the wrist of the other. Expression just as unreadable as always.

"Ah, hey, Ice... You won't tell him that I did that, will you?"

And the younger nation just blinked in response, staring at the splinted mess of wood for a moment, before taking a sip of his soda and turning to walk back to the kitchen. "...Sure..."

Good.

So now on to find Norway!

"Norge! Norge!" He didn't bother to wait for an answer, since if Norway was knocked out and lying on the floor, he couldn't answer anyway. So he just barged up the stairs, taking them three at a time, and then ran straight to his office, slamming the door open.

A little too hard, since it fell off the hinges.

Oh well, he could fix that later.

"NORGE! ARE YOU OKAY? ANSWER ME!"

"...You do realize that my front door wasn't even locked?..."

Well, he wasn't lying knocked out on the floor.

In fact, he happened to be sitting in a rather comfortable-appearing chair, staring at Denmark with a blank expression—Denmark vaguely wondered if that expression was genetic; it would explain how both he and Iceland could pull it off so well. Although, if you were good at reading the nation, you would be able to tell rather easily that he was not happy right now. As two of his doors had just been destroyed unnecessarily by his most constant annoyance.

He really should have invested in that electric fence...

He also should have known that there was no way that he was actually going to get to enjoy the only day of relaxation he'd had in months. No meetings with his boss, no need to visit any other nations; he could just spend his day in his office, reading and napping.

But no. Because Denmark somehow managed to always know when he was free... (He was actually starting to get suspicious about that. How in the world could he be so aware of his daily schedule? Idiots' luck could only get you so far...)

"So, let's go drinking!" Denmark suddenly exclaimed, throwing is axe onto the ground, somehow managing to angle it so that it actually managed to cut through his carpet.

...

"...You're annoying..."

And now he was suddenly being swatted on the back, hard enough that it actually managed to knock his book right out of his hands and onto the floor, where it landed upside-down. Like a rather poorly-made tent.

"Let's go drinking! You never go out drinking with me. And we—Prussia, England, and me—found this amazing club a while ago, and everybody there absolutely loves me. They even asked me to come back and be the back-up bass for one of their usual bands! So you should come with me!"

"...No..."

"Aww~! Come on, Norge! I'll even pay for the drinks."

Definitely should have invested in the electric fence.

Denmark wasn't going to leave until he said yes; he could tell already...

Then again, once they got outside, he could always call for one of his troll friends to come and deal with this idiot.

That idea was appealing.

"...Fine..."

"YES!" And his back was slammed again, this time almost knocking him right out of his chair. And Denmark threw his fist in the air in some sort of victory dance. "Wait 'til you see this place! Everybody fucking loves me there. You should see the chicks fall all over themselves whenever I'm on stage!"

The troll idea just kept sounding more and more appealing. Especially as the Norwegian followed the Danish nation down the stairs and had his first glimpse of what had once been his front door. And now would probably only be useful as firewood. If that...

"...You're buying me a new door..."

"Sure, sure!" Denmark waved the remark aside, probably not even paying attention to what anyone was saying. "It'll be even better than this one!"

"This is the fifth door that you've broken..."

"That's not too bad..."

"This year."

Denmark blinked, glancing down at the still outwardly emotionless nation before chuckling, slightly nervously. "Ha... Really? Well, I'll make sure this one is sturdier!"

And then he turned, heading right outside without even pausing to make sure that he was being followed.

Which he wasn't, as Norway paused in the doorway, glancing around for a moment...

Before turning, fingers itching automatically toward where the doorknob would be if his 'friend' hadn't suddenly decided to completely demolish his entrance. He immediately started heading back toward his office. Before he paused, suddenly noticing a shadow moving around in the kitchen.

And then Iceland suddenly appeared in the doorway, holding a can of Coca-Cola in one hand, his puffin standing at his feet.

Where had he come from? Actually, Norway would prefer not to know...

"...He's gone?"

"...Yes."

Iceland nodded, taking a sip from the can before continuing, voice as deadpan as always. "...The troll?"

"...Yes."

And suddenly there was a loud shout, only slightly muffled by the distance. "Norge! Where'd ya—what the hell—" And then a very loud, very girly shriek of terror.

Norway and Iceland both just stood there. Listening. Until the screams died out.

And then Iceland shook the can, holding it out toward the other nation. "...You're out of Coke."

To which Norway turned and headed back up to his office. Maybe he could get through another chapter of his book before Denmark made his way back to bother him again. Or at least a page or two.

A/N: *rubs sweat from brow* Well, that took forever.

I'm hoping I did okay with the Nordic characterization; I'm so nervous I'm going to completely screw them up since I know like nothing about Nordic countries and the stuff that I've tried to learn doesn't entirely match up with how they're characterized in Hetalia. So... I'm just kind of trying to smoosh a whole bunch of sources together to create something that'll make me/you happy.

However, with that note, I totally recommend the doujinishi "Anko Uza Unlimited" for anyone who likes DenNor. It's adorable. And if anyone wants the link to the download, I can try to find it, or just look it up yourself, whatever ;D

By the way, does the puffin happen to have a name?

Random Translation:

Bróðir – brother in Icelandic (Do not ask me how to pronounce this. Icelandic is possibly the oddest language I've ever seen... *No offense to anyone Icelandic who might be reading this, but when you name two next door volcanoes Eyjafjallajokull and Katla, you know you've got either a weird language or a really good sense of humour...or both*)