I was momentarily speechless as Jacob spoke those words, but it quickly wore off and was replaced with anger. He still held my face in his hands and looked directly into my eyes. I met his gaze, trying to decipher what exactly he meant. As I did so, he slowly leaned in towards me. When I realized just what he was doing, I pushed off of him and flung myself backwards.
"Jake!" I gasped with the shock taking over again, "You don't have to try and lie to keep me here! I'm still going to visit Forks and see if anyone is alive!"
He was taken aback, "What makes you think I'm lying? Ness, I'm serious I love you..." he trailed off at the end, making it much less convincing.
I shook my head, inching away as he tried to scoot closer. It was strange, I had never wanted to be far away from Jake. I didn't even want to now, and I actually wanted to kiss him back. But I couldn't give in and let him win. I couldn't be trapped here again. Besides, I was certain it was all a lie. "My dad told me..." I trailed off, not wanting to get him in trouble.
Jake almost growled, "What the hell did Edward tell you?" He seemed angry. I knew that my dad didn't get along very well with Jacob, partly because the whole werewolf/vampire feud. But partly because...
I sighed, "I know you love my mom Jacob. Dad told me...you tried to win her like she was some kind of prize. You even...kissed her." I sounded sort of disgusted. Although I wasn't too comfortable with closing the distance right now, I still bent in towards him and placed my hand on the side of his face to show him the entire conversation as I remembered it.
He was quiet for a good couple of minutes before saying, "So, he didn't tell you everything?"
"That's all I was told," I answered with a shrug.
He took a deep breath, and I had the feeling that this would be a long story. "As a werewolf, there are certain things we can and can't do, and things that happen to us. One of those things is what we call 'imprinting'," he spent a good fifteen minutes describing it to me, and I was utterly fascinated by the concept. It sounded so lovely and romantic. But I was still completely caught off guard by the next part, "And when I first caught a glimpse in your eyes, I had a feeling like nothing I had ever felt before. And I knew that I had imprinted on you. I came to believe that I was so close to your mom because you were a part of her all along. I feel nothing for her anymore, just a friendship. And you...well, I'll be anything you need me to be." He smiled reassuringly, but I couldn't answer. I just stared at him, slack jawed.
Could I really love him? Deep down, I knew I had all along. As soon as I started looking and feeling older, the way I felt about him had started to change too. That was what had caused all of the awkwardness. But...I couldn't do it. I couldn't pretend to be happy for him, not when I was still agonizing over my family.
"I have to go back." I whispered after about five minutes of silence, "Someone can tell me what happened." I nodded, as if I were talking to myself.
Rather than protest, as I had naturally expected him to, Jacob answered with, "Give me a week, and I'll come with you."
I nodded, with a smile and adding a quick hug. But Jacob made the hug longer, and added a quick kiss to my forehead. Slightly embarrassed, I retreated to my room to start packing for the trip.