Beautiful Music
By My Self Indulgence
Chapter 5
Sighed Confessions
I stretched out and looked over to my phone through hooded eyes.
"Shit!" I groaned noticing the time.
It was 7:25 and I had 5 missed texts. I skipped through the 3 from Lori and sat up to read the 2 latest that were from Jackson. -I'm up. Call when you are - and -I'm lonely, coming over now!- that one came in 10 minutes ago.
"Shit!" I yelled again jumping out of bed and returning his text.
-Doors open. Beer in fridge. Me in shower. Take your pick- send.
I cranked on the radio and hit play before pulling the curtain shut. I was feeling 'school girl giddy' as I rushed through my shower and couldn't help but sing along when one of my favorite songs, "Don't Call Me Whitney Bobby" started. "
"Bones, bones brittle little bones, it's not the milk you seek. It's the sun you need and the sleek sleek skeleton I hold, where are the hidden folds? Where is the meat? Did you eat it?"
I was laughing as I turned the water off, but a little disappointed Jackson didn't get there in time. I ran a brush through my hair and twisted it into a sloppy knot when I heard a car door shut and my phone buzz simultaneously.
I threw my Chocolate Jesus shirt back on with some black yoga pants and flipped open my phone.
-Honey, I'm home!- The text read.
-Come in. Be right down.- I sent in reply as I heard the door open and close downstairs.
"Sit down. I'll be right there." I gave myself a once-over in the mirror, finally deciding this was as good as it was gonna get. I flipped the light, hopped down the stairs and jumped into Jackson's lap.
"Hey Cowboy! Why the sad face?"
"I missed the shower?" He pouted.
I couldn't help but smile at his puppy dog eyes.
"Well, let's get dirty and I'll have to take another one." I teased, grinding into him.
"Goddamn." He groaned, sliding his fingers through mine.
"Well, hello there." I giggled at the sudden hardness beneath me.
I lifted my arms with his to rest behind his head and kissed his open mouth. Jackson tried to unlace his fingers but I wasn't budging, after a brief struggle he surrendered.
"Did you know…"I whispered in his ear "that you have the nicest dick I've ever seen?"
Before he could answer I went in for another kiss, plunging my tongue into his mouth with force. I fought with his hands again until I finally gave in, letting him break free. He settled his grip on my ass, slamming me down into him. I threw my head back in a throaty moan before he reeled me in to rest my forehead against his, our eyes locked.
"I need you, now." I demanded breathlessly.
A wild smirk broke across his face as he took control again, leading me into a decidedly more passionate kiss. He pulled back slightly and took my face in his hands, forcing me into his gaze again.
"You are amazing, just so you know." he said with certainty. I felt my cheeks redden a little.
"I'm serious." He added, kissing me softy before continuing.
"You drive me crazy…here" he bucked his hips up slowly; rubbing is dick into my aching center.
"And here." he smiled, placing my hands over his heart.
I was rendered speechless at his statement and replied the only way I could, with a slow, fiery kiss.
I pulled away to catch my breath and settled into his shoulder.
"I feel exactly the same." I sighed.
A loud rumble erupted from my stomach, effectively killing the mood.
"Hungry?" He teased
"Starving." I admitted.
"Me too, actually." he agreed, letting me up and following me into the kitchen.
"This is where the magic happens!" I laughed as he took a seat at the table.
"OK, you have a few choices, but, I haven't made it to the store so there isn't much. We've got chicken parm, banana bread or…" I twisted the lid off a jar and continued, "or one pickle?"
"Chicken, please and thank you."
"What? No banana bread for the monkey man?" .
"Ha! Yeah, fuck it, I'll have both, but you can keep the pickle."
"How generous." I laughed as I bit the spear in half.
I continued plating and heating the chicken and sliced the banana bread into two big hunks before sitting across from Jackson at the table.
"Oh!" I jumped up and stuck my head in the fridge.
"Beer, Pepsi, normal fruit punch, or….kittie meds?" I offered.
Jackson laughed and mumbled "Beer, please." around a mouthful of chicken.
"This is good!" he added, shoveling in another forkful as I started on my dinner.
"Thanks, it's one of the many things I'm good at."
"Tell me about it." He smirked and threw back the last corner of bread.
"You make this, too?" he asked, pointing at the crumbs.
"Sure did, I'll make some more soon and you can take some home with you."
"Really? You're too good to me!" he smiled, reaching over to hold my hand across the table.
"Well, considering you've known me for all of 20 hours." I pointed out as I got up to clear the dishes.
"True, but this is technically our… third date." he said pointedly.
"How do you figure?"
"Last night we had drinks, we went out for breakfast this morning, that's two, and now dinner, that's three."
"Huh, well in that case, this is the longest relationship I've been in in a while." I laughed as I settled into his lap.
I took a swig of his beer before snuggling into his chest.
"Ha! Me too." he agreed.
"I like this." I sighed.
"Me too." he repeated, holding me in tighter and resting his chin on my head.
"Seems longer than 20 hours." he added under his breath, but I heard and responded silently.
Long enough for me to fall in love with you.
We sat like that in a comforting silence, Jackson tracing circles on my back, me, reveling in the attention until a sudden buzz made me jump.
"You're vibrating." I said as I lifted so he could reach his phone.
"Hey" he answered as I got up and grabbed my cigarettes, offering him one.
He took one and followed me outside to the back deck as he continued his conversation.
"Yeah, I don't know, man. Just record it. R-e-c-o-r-d it." he rolled his eyes, making me laugh.
"Yea, I told you I was coming here." he continued, sounding a little annoyed.
"No, probably not…fine I'll ask her." he held his hand over the receiver and looked over to me.
"Do you like Dane Cook?" he asked, already shaking his head 'no' assuming I didn't.
"Are you kidding me?" I beamed. "Hellooo, Boston girl here!" I said pointing at myself.
An adorable smile stretched across his face at my excitement.
"There's a new stand up on at 11 and we were gonna watch it. But if you don't…"
I cut him off, grabbing the phone.
"We'll be there, with food!" I laughed and tossed the phone back to Jackson.
"Ok, yea about 10:30. Bye." he finished and tucked the phone back in his pocket.
Jackson took a seat across from me and I propped my feet up on his lap as I let my hair down. About halfway through my cigarette I started to space out.
I am hopelessly falling for you. I mean, Christ, how could I not? Look at you!
"What's going on in here?" Jackson asked, tapping his temple.
"Huh?"
"What's on your mind?" he repeated
Well, I barley know you and I am thiiiis close to naming our unborn children.
I opened and shut my mouth a few times, trying to pull the right words from my brain.
"I'm just having a sex-induced melt down, don't mind me." I laughed, taking a long pull of my cigarette.
"Hmm, is that good or bad?" he questioned as he ran his hand up my leg.
"Oh, no its more than good. It's just that this.." I pointed from him to me, "is….I dunno, I can't think of the right word."
"Intense?" he offered with a smile.
"Exactly. Intense!" I agreed, hoping he chose that word because it's what he was feeling also.
"I know." There's my answer.
Jackson scooted his chair closer to mine and pulled me by my hips onto him.
"I don't care how fucked up this might sound," he whispered, his breath tickling my neck.
"But, I feel like I've been waiting for you for a long fucking time."
"Well, I'm right here." I teased.
"Honestly." he continued, looking into my eyes. "I'm not letting you get away."
His mossy eyes flickered a little in the moonlight and I had to remind myself to breath.
"So, 10:30?" I asked, tangling my fingers in his hair. Such a simple thing but it iced my spine every time.
"Whatever shall we do to pass the time?" I laughed as he slid his hands up the back of my shirt.
"Hmmm, we could go inside?" he suggested, his voice dripping sex.
"Or…." I smirked, lifting my shirt over my head. "We could just stay here."
He didn't seem to mind the change in plans as I felt him stiffen beneath me. Jackson reached behind himself to peel off his own shirt and I held my chest to his. I couldn't help but relish in the warmth of his skin against mine.
The wind started to pick up a little and the crisp September air blew a dark curl into Jackson's eye. I reached down to tuck it away when a loud crack of thunder tore through the darkness. I jumped a little at the sound but a smooth smile washed over me when I felt his hot breath at the nape of my neck.
I closed my eyes and tilted my head so he could have full access. I felt one calloused finger trace a line form my neck up to my lips, I opened my mouth and let him in. I slowly sucked his finger, pulling back to release it with a pop and caught the gleam in his eyes once more. There's something hiding behind their beauty. Something dark nestled deep beyond the lust. Something that scared the shit out of me yet left me wanting more at the same time. Another crack of thunder broke and we both jumped this time. I felt one lone drop on my shoulder and looked up to the sky. Jackson took this opportunity to lavish my breasts in soft kisses, catching my nipple between his lips. I shivered at the sensation and a weak moan escaped me.
Drop. Drop. Drop.
God, he looks so beautiful in the moonlight.
I watched a small droplet run down his wayward curl and land on my bare stomach as the sky opened up on us. I dug my nails through his wet hair and trembled when he fisted mine to pull me into a kiss. I'm not sure if rain-sex was a fetish of his, but this kiss was different. Urgent. Forceful. And I loved it. Jackson's tongue battled with mine around my moans and his grip tightened. He pulled back quickly, evil glimmer in his eyes.
"Take your pants off." he basically ordered.
I complied. I peeled them off along with my underwear. Both were soaked, although, more from Jackson than the rain I'm sure. I stood there drenched in desire, watching in anticipation as he finished taking off his boxers.
Jackson stood in front of me as I raised my hands over his shoulders, assuming he would want me to ride him. He grabbed my arms and spun me around, pulling me into him. I felt his hand glide up my back, the other still firmly on my shoulder and he pushed me down. Hard. Luckily, my hands reacted in time and I grabbed onto the edge of the table. I felt him tear into me and I shrieked in ½ pain ½ pleasure as he pulled out and filled me again.
I couldn't take a full breath as his grip on me tightened closer to my neck. The sound of the rain didn't camouflage the violent slapping sounds our bodies made s they slammed together.
"Jackson." I could hardly choke out as his hands bared down on me.
For a split second I was afraid. Afraid he would pull in tighter completely depleting my air. Afraid the sounds of the storm would muffle my cries for help, if it came to that. But mostly I was afraid because I liked it.
"Fuck!" He growled, pulling me up and slipping a hand between my legs.
Jackson's thick fingers worked vicious circles over my clit, and finally being able to inhale deeply, I let out a long over due scream. Not getting the leverage required, his thrusts were shallow now and accompanied by slow kisses up the side of my neck.
Ahh, there's my sweet cowboy.
Although "rough Jackson" had certainly earned a spot in my "spank-bank", I needed this sugary sweet chaser.
"Hey," he whispered into my ear, "C'mere."
He pulled out, turning me in his arms to face him. His lips found mine and I melted into his warm embrace.
I could feel his hard dick twitch against me hip and nudged him back into his chair.
I drug my soggy pants in front of him and knelt down, taking him into my hands. Jackson whimpered slightly as the heat of my mouth wrapped around his tip. I let my eyes meet his as I slowly took in his length. Catching his lower lip in his teeth, Jackson stifled a moan and ran a hand through his hair. I used one hand to lightly tug on his balls while
swirling my tongue over his ridge before taking him in again. I heard him clear his throat and looked up at him through my lashes, never breaking suction.
"You're gonna make me cum if you keep that up." he rasped, eyes delirious.
I slid my tongue up, base to tip, before replying.
"That's the point."
"No, beautiful." He grinned pulling me up from the ground as he stood.
"It's my job to make you cum." He began before pressing his lips to mine.
"At least once." he continued, placing his hands on the sides of my face.
"Before me." he finished with a kiss on my forehead.
"Then get to work." I mumbled into his slick chest as a chill ran through me.
"Let's go inside before you chip a tooth." he chuckled, noticing the sudden chattering of my teeth.
I just nodded unable to form any actual words as he took my hand and led me inside.
We ended up on my couch, me on his lap, with a thick blanket around us. It only took a few minutes for me to warm up enough to speak.
"I love…." I trailed off, not sure where I was going with that. "What you do to me." I sighed, happy my quick thinking saved me for the second time tonight.
Was that disappointment brewing in his eyes? I wondered as his fallen smile twitched up at the sides again.
"Fuck!" he spat, jostling me in his lap with his volume.
"What time is it?" He asked, sounding utterly deflated.
"Um, shit, 10:28." I frowned, looking at the clock.
"One second, ok?" he shifted me to the cushion next to him and walked out of the room.
I giggled to myself at the swing in his step, he had such a great ass! A minute later he was back, dripping pants in one hand and a pack of soggy cigarettes in the other. He plopped down next to me and fished out his cell, dropping the pack on the table.
"I think those are gone." he said with a smirk. "I just have to call Jerad and let him know we're not coming so he can get some food."
I smiled at the gesture, how considerate!
"Hey, wait! How come we're not going?" I rushed out, pulling the phone from his hand.
"Because we have unfinished business to attend to." he said smugly, placing a kiss between my breasts.
I tugged the slipping blanket back around me and huffed.
"Well, how about this. You tell him to order food, then finish me off, and we will be there before the shit gets cold." I beamed, proud of my idea.
"Finish you off?" he chuckled.
"Ok, Ok. Happy endings for all." I wiggled my eyebrows, making him laugh harder.
"Ok, if you say so."
He took the phone and dialed.
"Be right back." I mouthed, grabbing my cigarettes from the table. I walked through the kitchen, nearly tripping over my cover, and tossed the pack in the trash.
"Tsk Tsk, such a waste."
I peeled the cellophane off a new pack and grabbed a beer from the fridge before lighting up.
"Are you coming?" Jackson called from the couch.
"Not yet." I mewed as I made my way over to him, offering him the last few drags.
I climbed back into his lap and took a long pull of my beer.
"He's getting pizza." Jackson informed me as he took the bottle from my hand and downed it in one gulp before dropping in the cigarette.
He tugged the blanket off my shoulders and let it fall to the floor before taking a deep breath through his nose.
"Let's do this!" he smirked, tossing me down on the couch and buried his head between my legs.
What started out as a playful giggle became a strangled moan when his tongue liquefied my center.
"Fuck!" I panted as he slipped two thick fingers into me.
With a quick flutter of his tongue against me, I was done.
"Jackson!" I groaned as my body convulsed and bucked up against his lips, riding out my orgasm.
He trailed his tongue across my stomach, dotting kisses up my chest as he laid over me.
"That was fast." he smirked, nipping at my trembling lips.
"Fuck me." I croaked out between gasps-still reeling from my mini-death.
His thick cock sank into me, starting another wave of heat building throughout my body. Never in my life have I came that fast, not even when left to my own devices. How he could know my body better than anyone, better than I did, baffled me. I opened my eyes, kissing his muscular shoulders as he slid into me again.
"I love the way your pussy tastes." he groaned, burying his face in my hair.
"But, I love having it wrapped around my dick even more."
His voice brought me closer to ecstasy again and I found it hard not to throw the "L" word back at him. The heat of
his release filled me, pushing me over the edge with him.
"I love you." I sighed, faintly above a whisper.
I squeezed my eyes shut and froze.
Why the fuck did I say that? Maybe he didn't hear me. Of course he heard me. Shit! Retard!
I felt his warm lips press softly to my temple and instantly relaxed my scrunched up face.
"I think I just might love you, too." he whispered.
His words swirled around in my head for a minute before they fully sunk in. His lips grazed my eyelids and I carefully opened, afraid I'd find him laughing. Laughing at me. No traces of humor were in his eyes as they caught mine. Just an honest, soulful, post-coital sheen. I smiled at his blissed out expression and exhaled heavily. Mostly out of relief but the mind numbing orgasms could have played a part as well.
My thoughts and eyes wandered until I spotted his sloshy pants on the floor.
"You have no pants."
"Hmm. That could be a problem." he chuckled, sitting up
"Oh, wait. I might have something."
I got up and trotted up the stairs, my legs still weak.
"I don't want anything written across my ass!" I heard him call as I flipped on the light in my closet.
I dug out a baggy pair of black sweats and tossed them on my bed as I rummaged around for something to wear. I settled into my comfiest blue jeans and tugged on a tank and roomy Boston Bruins hoodie.
I pulled on some socks and my ratty sketchers when all of a sudden it hit me.
I think I just might love you too?
I grinned ear to ear as I played it back in my head. Sure, it may have been "heat of the moment verbal diarrhea" but whatever! I couldn't recall the last time I heard anything even close to that directed towards me. I'll take it!
I grabbed the sweats and bounced down the stairs in a love drunk stupor.
"Oh, loverboy!" I sang, finding the living room empty, save for a sleeping Heff in the corner.
"Yes." I heard his deep reply and my favorite scene from Dirty Dancing popped in my head.
Jackson was sitting at the table, blanketed up.
"C'mere loverboy!" I growled, curling my finger at him with a smile.
He let the blanket fall and chuckled as he sauntered over to me.
Something about a naked guy in cowboy boots just did it for me, I guess.
"Don't get your hopes up, I can't dance like Swayze."
"Neither can I, so it's all good." I assured him as I smacked his bare ass.
"Here ya go." I pushed the sweatpants between us and he took them with a cautious eye.
"These aren't Jared's are they?" He snorted out a hearty laugh.
"Fuck you!" I glared, punching him in the collarbone.
I pulled back and doubled over, not expecting him to be so solid.
"Mother FUCK!" I yelped shaking my hand out awkwardly.
"You ok?" He asked, true concern replacing his laughter.
"I'm fine. Dick." I spat, pulling out a cigarette and hopping up onto the counter to nurse my bruised ego.
Jackson pulled on the pants and cautiously walked over to me, puppy dog eyes cued up.
"I'm sorry." he pleaded, resting his chin in my lap to look up at me.
"Don't hate me." he added and threw in that wicked grin for good measure.
I blew out a billowy cloud and met him half way until we were eye level.
"I don't think I could ever hate you." I smiled placing a sloppy kiss on his lips.
"MMM" I hummed. "Your mouth always tastes so good." I sighed, sliding off the counter.
"Oh, that reminds me. Let me go grab Jerad's shirt." I shot him an evil eye and walked over to the stairs.
"Whoa!" He protested behind me, effectively taking the bait.
"What the fuck does that mean?" he questioned, looking half confused, half irate.
"Wha?" I scoffed, feigning ignorance as I took the shirt from the banister and brought it up to my nose, inhaling deeply.
"Ughhh" I groaned. "Yummeeeee" I drug out, hammering that last nail in.
Jackson's face dropped and I could see he was internally searching for words. I threw Jerads's balled up shirt in his face with a satisfied smirk.
"Don't dish it out if you can't take it, honey."
His shoulders relaxed and a shit eating grin replaced his scowl.
"Bitch." he mumbled into my mouth with a kiss.
"Well. This bitch has a hot date with Dane Cook and a pizza, so let's go." I laughed, pulling him towards the door by the dangling drawstring.
The rain had let up but the wind was still howling as I got in his truck.
"Shit! I forgot my phone and my cigarettes." I whined.
Jackson smiled and jogged back up the stairs to fetch them for me.
"13 missed texts." he huffed breathlessly as he tossed me my phone and my pack.
"Couldn't find your lighter, but I didn't really look all that hard either." he added as he put the truck in drive.
"That's fine. As long as I have my butts and my cowboy, I'm good."
He glanced in my direction with an easy smile and flipped his hand up on his leg. I took the invitation and laced my fingers with his, nestling into his shoulder. I felt him press a kiss on the top of my head as he squeezed my hand in his.
"I really do think I'm falling in love with you." I admitted, throwing caution to the wind.
"Good." he stated, without emotion, leaving me feeling a little stupid.
"Because I think I already fell." he added, pulling my hand to his lips.
We were both silent for the rest of the ride as I tried to rationalize my "way too soon" feelings.
Love wasn't supposed to be rational, was it? It certainly didn't have to make sense. Love, lust or whatever it was that I felt for Jackson was a welcome change, though. I decided right then and there that regardless of how ridiculous it sounded, I loved him. It did sorta have a fairytale ring to it after all.
I met a guy at a bar. I fucked said guy. We fell in love, the end.
Ok, so maybe it wouldn't' be a story for the grandkids but it was just that simple and just that perfect to me.
I flipped open my phone and thumbed through the texts from Lori, only really reading the last one.
-Did you run off to Vegas yet?-
I laughed, although I probably would've had he asked me to.
-I wish!- send.
My phone instantly buzzed with her response.
-Christ that was fast!-
It was and I didn't care.
-Love- was all I sent in reply.
I tossed my phone back into my bag as Jackson pulled to a stop and turned off the ignition.
Yeah. Love.