Author Note: ... Jackie starts to realize her limitations and she's not happy with it...

T7S

Chapter 06 – Vanity

T7S

Jackie was sitting on the bed with her chin on her knees. Air Supply was playing softly in the background. She had no idea if the bedroom light was on or off. She heard sounds – the cheering of the crowd watching the sports event downstairs, Eric humming in his bedroom, the whisper quiet click of the central heater turning on….her own breathing.

Her eyes were starting to really hurt and the bandages felt wet. Jackie hoped Kitty hadn't forgotten about her. Except for Bob and the Forman's, none of her friends came to visit her in the hospital or call. Did she really look that hideous?

She felt the dry skin on her face and knew she was peeling. What did Mrs. Forman say…it looked like she had a bad sunburn? She had burned before so that wouldn't be so bad. But her eyes! Did the acid ruin her pupils? Would she never be able to wink again? Flirt again? She didn't know and that bothered her a lot.

Kitty's quick footsteps shuffling through the shag carpeting announced her arrival before she even got to the door. "Hi Mrs. Forman. I was hoping that was you."

"Ahahahaha, you knew it was me!" Kitty laughed. "I guess there will be no sneaking up on you young lady!"

Jackie had to smile, "No, I can hear everything even though I don't want to." Jackie heard Kitty setting bottles and supplies on the night stand beside her. Her weight bowed the bed slightly as the older woman sat down. "Okay, I'm going to remove the bandages and I want you to promise to keep your eyes closed."

"I promise. They just itch so badly."

Kitty looked over her shoulder. "Eric, honey. Wash your hands. I want to show you how to do this."

Eric felt struck. He wasn't a doctor! He could barely bandage himself after a nick in the shaving process! "Ah…yeah…sure mom."

Kitty unwound the gauze from around the chestnut colored hair. "Honey, when the doctor thinks its okay, we'll get you eye patches and you'll be more comfortable than wearing all this cotton. Eric, hurry up."

Jackie could heard Eric stumble into his sister's old bedroom and imagined him standing there with his arms all akimbo, acting awkward and frustrated that his mom recruited him so suddenly.

"Now Eric, watch and listen. It's important that you gently peel away the gauze slowly. We don't want to pull her eyelashes out….."

Eric watched the damp gauze bandages reveal red angry and swollen eyes. The vapor from the chemicals had reduced Jackie's beautiful eyes to slits. His mom gently pulled down the lower lid and dropped in a topical steroid. Jackie hissed in pain and tried to reach her face but Kitty grabbed her wrist.

"Honey, don't scratch, it's going to sting but that's because it's healing. Eric, come around and hold her hand while I do the other eye."

Jackie reached out for his hand and gripped it tightly while Kitty attended to the other eye. She showed the dropper bottle to Eric. "She gets one drop in each eye nightly. Okay, this ointment goes over the eyelids top and bottom to ease the swelling." Kitty squirted a dab on her son's finger as well as her own. As they massaged the balm over the wounded area, Jackie visibly relaxed. "That feels so much better."

Kitty broke off a piece of aloe vera plant. "Honey, just smooth this over her skin so she doesn't peel too badly." Eric was gentle and amazed at how small her face was. She was the perfect patient as he smoothed the aloe over her forehead and cheeks.

"Does that itch much?" he asked.

She smiled, "Like crazy! That plant of your mom's makes it feel better."

"Eric, now that we put the medicine in, take your gauze and fold it in half and in half again….hold it against her eye….good. Now I'm going to wrap her back up." Kitty wound fresh gauze around Jackie's head.

"Give her two of these with a drink of water and then wash your hands again. I'll be right back."

Jackie heard Kitty leave. "I guess she's making you my temporary nurse."

Eric sighed, "Yeah…knowing me, I'd probably poke you in the eye and end up with a foot in my ass." He was surprised when Jackie giggled. "I missed that."

"You missed my dad?"

"Well, I hadn't been hanging around the basement and you know how upset your dad gets….He can be funny and I missed it."

Eric spilled the pills into Jackie's palm and gave her a glass of water. "Drink up." Jackie swallowed and handed back the glass. "Thanks Eric. You don't have to be nice to me you know."

"What are you talking about?" He wished he could see her eyes and not those damn bandages.

"As I recall we were just tolerable of each other and now you're stuck taking care of me. I know I would resent it and I won't be offended if you are too."

Eric sighed. "Jackie, I don't resent you. If you hadn't bumped me, I would be in your place right now. I owe you a lot and I'm sorry if I hadn't said something earlier. I'm kind of glad that we can take care of you instead of leaving you with Fez."

Jackie shuddered. "Me too. He's a good guy and I love him as a friend, but he would a terrible nurse – he'd rather date one!"

Eric laughed. "Yeah…he'd probably give you the wrong medicines at the wrong time and hide your cane for fun."

"Just don't tell him it's a candy cane." She laughed. It felt good to chuckle. She had cried enough these past few days. Laughter was preferable. "Hey Eric," she said softly.

"Yeah Jackie?" he smiled back even though she couldn't see him.

She moved her hands in search of his face. Eric knew what she was trying to do and he guided her fingers to his face. Her small hands smoothed over his cheeks and the stubble of his jaw – she touched the faint lines on his forehead, memorizing each bone, arch and wrinkle of his face. "Now I remember what you look like."

Eric squeezed her fingers. "Good night Jackie." He said softly as he carried the medicine basket out of the room. Kitty whisked in, "Okay sweetheart, do you sleep in a nightie or pajamas?"

Jackie smiled. "Nightgown." She yawned. "I'm more tired than I thought." She felt the silk nightgown Mrs. Forman dropped in her lap. "Okay, I'm going to turn out the light and we'll see you for breakfast in the morning."

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Jackie woke the next morning feeling bewildered. She wasn't in her apartment and this didn't smell like the hospital. She quickly jumped out of bed and landed flat on her face. Shag carpeting. She was still blind.

Shit.

Don't cry. She told herself. You're still at the Forman's house. You're alone.

There were no discernable noises that she could hear. What side of the bed did she fall on? Feeling the floor, she found her tennis shoes and then the legs of the nightstand. Okay, the dresser was only eight steps away. She could get dressed and go downstairs.

Jackie learned that dressing herself was going to be a difficult task. What if she mixed orange with yellow? She couldn't see colors and now whatever she put on would make her look stupid. She checked the second drawer and knew her sweatpants were gray and gray went with everything. She pulled open the bottom drawer and grabbed a sweatshirt. Gray was the way she felt this morning. Socks were easy, most were white so she quickly put on her shoes and found the cane.

I can't even put on makeup. I'm going to look like an uggo!

Jackie sighed and reached for the cane. Despite how much she fought the therapist about using it, the white tipped stick did come in handy.

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Jackie made it to the kitchen and froze. There was a stranger in here. She could smell Brut aftershave and some kind of hair gel. Was it Steven? She tapped her way over to the table and sat down.

"Heidi-ho Jackie!" Came Bob Pinciotti's friendly voice. Jackie sighed in relief. "Good morning Bob. Where's Mrs. Forman?"

"Oh, she got an emergency call. One of the nurses had to leave town and Kitty's filling in on the morning shift. You don't mind if I make you breakfast do ya?"

"No. I have to figure it out sometime but whatever you're cooking smells good."

Bob put something on the stove top that sizzled. "Bacon. Always start your day with bacon and nothing bad will happen to ya." Jackie shifted in her chair so she was at least facing him.

"Bob, if I ask you a question will you answer me honestly?"

Bob's feet treaded over with a plate of good smelling scrambled eggs and bacon. He hefted his weight in the chair next to her. "What's your question kiddo?"

"Do I look ugly? I know that sounds vain but no one will tell me what I look like!"

"Well, you don't look too much different than the last time I saw ya. There's some peeling around your forehead and those big bandages over your eyes. You still have nice lips and no blemishes. Is that what you want to know?"

"Yes! Thank you." She touched her plate to see where the eggs were. Her fork went in and came up empty. "Crap." Bob got up and brought back a spoon. "Eggs don't have much weight. It's like scooping up cotton balls. Hey, can I ask you a question?"

"Sure." This time she managed to get a scoop of scrambled eggs into her mouth.

"What does it feel like to be….not able to see? Is there pain?" Bob was a loud nose breather.

Jackie replied. "My eyeballs hurt from the acid vapor but it's like being in a real dark room where you can't see the furniture or walls. It's scary."

"How long before all those bandages can come off?" Bob asked. Jackie touched the gauze. "When the swelling goes down," she replied, "The doctor said my eyes could get infected if I'm not careful."

"Jeez Jackie, I'm sorry this happened to ya. I tried to talk to Donna and see if she could come down and visit but she's busy with school."

Jackie tried to hide her disappointment. "That's okay. She's doing what she's dreamed of. I'm sure she'll call when she has some free time."

Bob sipped his coffee. "That's too bad about Steven."

Jackie let the sentence hang in the air. Yeah, what about Steven? Where has he been hiding?

Bob quickly said, "Oops, I wasn't supposed to say anything." Jackie was looking at him with those round bandages and he could imagine her glaring. "Okay, Steven moved out. He thought you would be all clingy and he'd have to take care of you."

"I would never ask him to care for me. He already showed me how much he cared when he married and divorced the stripper. I thought he and I moved past that."

Bob sighed. "Well…he left a note and just moved out of the basement."

So he just left. No nurse no stripper to keep him company. All it took was a blind girl to chase him away.

The big jerk!

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As the week went on, Jackie measured her progress in small tasks she accomplished. By the end of the second day, she could run up and down the stairs. She could find her own drinking glasses and get her own water without shattering the glass. The third day she was able to measure and make coffee in the percolator. On Thursday, she helped Kitty wash dishes. Each little task made her feel a little more important.

When Friday came, she was excited because Fez and Michael were coming for a visit. She had seen Brooke or the baby in a long time. In fact, she hadn't seen any of her friends since before the accident.

Eric had become an expert in applying the steroid drops and bandaging her head. The two carried on conversations about his new job as if her blindness wasn't a factor – that made her feel more human. Eric would tell her about his HUGE blister from the steel toed boots and then laugh about a bulldozer that ran over the boss's car.

"I heard that Bob told you about Hyde." Eric said as he wrapped the gauze around her head.

"Yeah, couldn't face me and had to run. Isn't that what he always does?"

"Kelso and Fez can't wait to see you. Fez would have come to the hospital but you were kind of secluded."

"Eric, could you help me pick out an outfit?"

Eric frowned, "I'm not good at that girlie stuff."

Jackie laughed and grabbed for his bicep. "No, I mean just tell me the colors and I'll put it together. I don't want to look like Pippi Longstocking."

"Oh, colors. I can help with that." Eric walked her over to the dresser. She opened the drawer, "I need a pink bra and there's matching panties in there."

Eric's throat got tight and Jackie could feel his muscle jerk under her hand. "Er…um are you sure you want me to touch your underwear?"

Jackie almost laughed, "I guess I could ask your dad…."

"Got it…pink tops and pink bottoms." He laid the lingerie on the dresser and Jackie swung him towards the closet. "I need black denim pants and the pink cashmere sweater."

Eric reached in and touched the soft sweater. All of Jackie's clothes had a soft tactile feel – silky, warm, and lacy. Eric wished some of Donna's clothes had been chosen with such care. Jackie was still talking, "….oh, and I have low heeled black ankle boots."

The clothes were hung on the closet door knob and the boots on the floor. She turned to him and he didn't realize how close her face was or that she smelled incredibly nice. "So….what do you think?"

"I think you'll have a nice visit." He replied.

"No silly, my outfit. Will I look pretty? I don't want everyone talking about my bandages. I want them to notice my clothes."

Eric laughed. "That's the Jackie Burkhart I remember. Welcome back!" Jackie laughed and gave him a hug, "Thank you Eric. It's nice to have you as a friend."

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