AN: Ho, ho, ho. Merry Christmas.

I was busy acting this week so I couldn't update efficiently.

Again, a big happy face to anyone reading this.

In Kazzy's manshion, he was welcoming his guests.

"Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls. Let us welcome a most exelent guest." (applause from the crowd)

"Thank you folks." he said. "But our guest is a whole bunch of guests! A whole band! Let us welcome them!"

And as the crowd cheered, a platform started to rise, with the sounds of a heavy metal song.

The saints are crippled

On this sinners' night

Lost are the lambs with no guiding light

The walls come down like thunder

The Rock's about to roll

It's the Arockalypse

Now bare your soul

All we need is lightning

With power and might

Striking down the prophets of false

And as the moon is rising

Give us the sign

Now let us rise up in awe

Rock'n'roll angels, bring thyn hard. Rock Hallilujah

Demons and angels all in one have arrived

Rock'n'roll angels, bring thyn hard. Rock Hallilujah

In God's creation supernatural high

At that point, the platform was fully risen and the guests visible. They were dressed up like monsters.

Kazzy sang along until the song was finished after which he started clapping and the crowd started cheering.

"Bravo, bravo!" exclaimed Kazzy. "So ladies and gentlemen, I give you LORDIII!"

More cheering from the audience and some inhuman screams from Lordi.

"But the real surprise is: Lordi have a new member!" said Kazzy to some more happines of the crowd.

"Yes folks, on her new position as female vocal, I give you, TRUUUUUUUUUE OGRRREEEEEEEEEEEE!"

True Ogre was a crowd's favorite so everybody screamed their throaths out. Meanwhile, True Ogre was positioning herself on the couch along with the rest of the band.

"So, T.O." said Kazzy in a stupid way. "What motivated you to be into showbiz?"

"Well, I like so totaly knew that this is the buisness for me." said T.O. in a manner similar to Cher Horovitz.

"So super gnarley!" exclaimed Kazzy. "Anyways, Lordi, why did you accept T.O. in the band?"

"Well..." started Mr. Lordi in a monsterous voice. "We appreciate the worthy efforts of fellow monsters. And, there are very few monsters lately, tell you the truth."

"Yeah" continued Awa. "And even less girl monsters. We just couldn't have left poor T.O. on her own.

"But tell you the truth, guys, " said Kazzy in a worried way. "Don't you think that the horns are a little cliche?"

At that, T.O. started crying and started to exhale fire after which the band members comforted her with a group hug.

"Aww... Let's not cry on Christmas eve." said Kazzy in a Christmasy manner. "C'mon. Let's get a Christmas hat for T.O."

The JACK elves immediately brought a Christmas hat which T.O. donned and started exhaling fires of joy. After she was done with the pyroshow, the band settled again on Kazzy's couch.

"So guys, I've been hearing a rumour that you guys are gonna transfer into a country rock band." said Kazzy as the audience gasped.

"Well..." Mr. Lordi was sweating a little. "Now that you mention it, we will do it. In fact, we are transforming today, all thanks to you, Kazzy."

And that very instant, the band transformed into cowboys , and Mr. Lordi's axe turned into a shotgun. They now had benjos instead of guitars and a violin instead of a keyboard. Only T.O. remained the same becasuse she was a real monster.

"Check me out, y'all!" said Awa while she examined her new pink dress.

"Great! Y'all look so great now!" shouted Kazzy, but was interupted by a JACk elf

"Boss, you've got mail." and two other JACK elves came in carrying a truck full of letters. They dumped it on Kazzy's head and he was smashed.

After a while, Kazzy crawled from under the truck and kicked the truckdriver out.(he was still in the truck).

Next, he began opening the letters.

"The first one looks nice and warm. Oh, I'm so glad people send me fan mail already." he said with a whinsical smile. "It must be the Christmas Spirit. Okay. The first letter.

You are a sick and horrible person! How dare you turn Lordi into a country rock band! I hope you get stuck in Limbo for the rest of forever!

Signed: Disgruntled Heavy Metal fan."

"Hm..." Kazzy scratched his head. "Unusual, but, let's see, letter #2

You pig! You svine! You think that you can mutilate our favorite band?! I'm coming over with an AK-47 to murderize you, you sick Christmas dork!'"

Kazzy stared at the letters in disbeleif. And then it hit him.

"This is hate mail! People hate me!" he started crying. "Somebody get me tissues!"

"Hey boss," said a JACK elf. "We've got an angry mob outside."

"What mob?" he thought for a minute and immediately shouted. "I didn't smuggle booze, honest and for truly!"

"Not that mob, boss. The angry mob."

"Ah, that mob." he paused for a little, before... "AAAAAA! They're gonna murderize me with AK-47s! Heeelp!" he turned towards Lordi. "Guys, you gotta change back into heavy metal!"

"No deal, partner" said Mr. Lordi with a southern accent. "We have a little ol' deal with a little ol' producer who wann's us."

"An' I always wanted to be a southern belle." said Awa.

"I think I've gone an' hurt my lil ol' hand." complained Kita.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!" screamed Kazzy. "People, it wasn't me. I didn't do this to Lordi. I just wanted everyone to have a happy Christmas. It wasn't my idea. It was..." he scanned the studio for a scapegoat. "GILL!!! Yeah. It was Gill!"

The camera turned and Gill the TV Corporate Honcho came into view.

"Gill wanted to destroy Christmas! But we'll stop him. Elves, attack!"

The JACK elves seized Gill and threw him through the window to the angry mob.

"The man who just flew out of the window tried to destroy Christmas and countryrockafy Lordi!" shouted Kazzy at the camera after which the angry mob beat up Gill and left the manshion.

Seeing that the angry mob was gone, Kazzy continued.

"And now for our second guest, but first, a word from our sponsors."

Meanwhile, Jin and the gang were stuck in trafic, because some crazy bear was threathening to commit suicide if some crazy panda wouldn't marry him.

"Awe we thewe yet?" asked Xiao.

Jin looked upwards and mouthed something that looked like "Why me?".

And so the story continues.

Disclaimer: I do not own Lordi or Hard Rock Hallilujah.

Ho, ho, ho. Merry Christmas.