Lie Tonight – Chapter 3
By MyNameIsCAL
My apartment, and any of the flock's homes, was a refuge for Gazzy from the paparazzi. Here was when the media couldn't find him, and it made them wonder where he could possibly disappear to for so long.
"How long can I crash here for?" Gazzy questioned.
I stood in the doorway to my room, my eyes closed. Now would be the best time to have someone around, someone to keep me company and distracted.
"As long as you'd like," I replied.
"Maybe a week?"
"Like I said, as long as you'd like."
Closing the door behind me, I pulled my clothes off and got into the shower, running the hot water over my face. It had been a long day and I read to forget it. After drying off, I pulled on some clothes and crawled into bed, pulling the covers over my head, trying to catch some sleep. I thought about Max for a while and the ring I still had for her in my locked drawer. The old photographs were in there too of me and her. Inside her house, the one Sam and she had gotten recently, still had a couple of pictures of us. Sam was always kind to me, but I really wondered what he thought about my relationship with Max. Did he even suspect that I still had feelings for her?
The night dragged on with more questions. Through the walls, I could hear Gazzy snoring already. My upstairs neighbor had a dog that was now running around. It really sucked to have better hearing than humans sometimes. Or maybe I just let those kinds of things annoy me more when I was angry and irritable.
Some hours later, I fell asleep.
Max was suddenly at my door the next day. I was still in my pajamas and Gazzy had already gone out to Iggy's to get breakfast.
"I'm stealing you for today," she said. "Iggy said it would be alright."
"I gotta change," I mumbled.
"I'll wait," she insisted. "Do you want coffee?"
"Please," I said, trudging back to my room.
It was so hard to be around her without thinking too much. I closed the door and leaned against it, sliding down. How was I supposed to survive today if I was already falling apart being around her for five seconds?
Pull yourself together, a voice inside my head said, that part of me that thought more rationally. It'll make her happy.
Of course it would. I dug through my drawer and pulled out a t-shirt and some shorts. A t-shirt Max had bought for me a couple years back. Well, far back enough to the time when we were still together. Sometimes I wore it in hopes that she would remember how good life was back then and she would suddenly send Sam away and hug me and say, "It was always you, Fang. It was always you!"
But you know, that only happens in movies and it sounds, well, cliché.
And of course, she wouldn't even remember she bought me the t-shirt as we got into the car. Sometimes I really thought she blocked the parts of her life when we were romantically involved. Like it had been a bad dream that needed forgetting.
"So what's up?" Max never failed to see when there was something wrong with me. If only she saw it was her that was causing the problem.
"Tired." I leaned against the door.
"C'mon, Fang," she frowned. "I know when you're lying. Tell me."
"Nothing," I grumbled.
She sighed. "Alright, then."
We spent the first part of the day in and out of wedding places, looking at everything from dresses to décor. For lunch, we ended up at some place tasting food for the wedding.
"Why isn't Sam doing this with you?" I asked.
"He's got an important meeting today," she responded. "And insisted whatever I chose would be fine."
If I were Sam, I'd be here every step of the way helping with wedding plans, I thought to myself. Then again I worked at Iggy's restaurant and Sam had an actual future ahead of him.
The day ended with the food picked out for the wedding, a bridal shop picked out to go back to, and a bigger hole in my heart. Max dropped me off at Iggy's restaurant, giving me a hug goodbye as always. Every time she did that, it got harder and harder to let go.
Later that night, I did some searching about the responsibilities of being a "maid" of honor. The most difficult thing to me seemed like the speech writing. What was I supposed to say to the woman I loved and the one and only person I was in love with? How many years have I been telling myself that I would get over Max? Too many.
"After the wedding, maybe you should get away for a while," Gazzy advised. "Take a break from all this stress and forget about things, you know? I'll take you somewhere. We should go to Europe or China or somewhere."
I slouched into my armchair. "Sure, that sounds great."
"I know you're upset," Gazzy said. "But this can all turn very unhealthy for you. I'm not saying you're hopeless, but I just worry, I guess."
Maybe he was right. I needed to get away, but maybe not for a week or a month, maybe for a long time.
Long enough for Max to completely forget about me for a while.
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