Out Of It
V
Sasuke stared out of Iruka's wide windows at the snow that was gently falling. It clung to the window sill in clumps.
Iruka cleared his throat to get the dark-haired boy's attention. Sasuke nearly refused to look over. He didn't want to play Iruka's game. Then Naruto's words came back to him and reluctantly, Sasuke tugged his gaze to look at the therapist, who was sitting relaxed in his desk chair.
Sasuke had to give the man some credit; their hour-long session was more than halfway done and all Sasuke had offered were noncommittal, one-word replies. Yet Iruka remained calm and patient, like he had for every session over the last few months.
"I've noticed over that your antisocial tendencies seem to be doing better. You talk often with Naruto, am I right?"
"Yes. Can I see my brother yet?"
Iruka sighed and stood. He came around to perch on the edge of his desk in front of his patient.
Sasuke tried to concentrate on Iruka's answer--he briefly wondered if talking to other patients in the ward had given him any credibility--but a memory intruded on his thoughts. Sasuke had been sitting exactly where his psychologist was and his roommate's warm mouth had been pressed against his own in the dark.
Blinking to clear the memory away, Sasuke realised Iruka was in the middle of denying his request again.
"...ward to ward visits usually aren't permitted anyhow and your condition makes it difficult."
"Sociopathy," Sasuke stated.
"We diagnosed you as a sociopath, yes. Do you understand what that entails? Do you know what a sociopath is?"
This was a new twist on the conversation topics Iruka usually presented him. If the doctor had done this to purposely intrigue him, Sasuke could admit it was working.
"I'm not a people person, right?"
"That's a basic definition of it. Antisocial Personality Disorder means you have no real moral concern for anyone besides yourself."
Sasuke frowned slightly. This irked something in him but he wasn't sure why. The description was correct, after all.
Iruka paused at Sasuke's reaction. But when Sasuke didn't say anything, he continued, "Sociopaths believe they are free from the rules of society and often don't feel the guilt associated with crimes."
"It's not a crime to kill a homicidal maniac. The government does it all the time," Sasuke growled out.
"Ah, but you're not the gov--"
A knock at the door interrupted. Both Iruka and Sasuke glanced at the clock on the mantelpiece and Iruka couldn't help rolling his eyes.
"Come in!" He called.
As Kakashi entered, Iruka turned to Sasuke and said calmly, "I guess we'll wrap it up for today."
Sasuke stood and automatically made to follow the masked orderly.
"You're late, Kakashi," Iruka said, walking back around his desk to retake his seat.
"Eh...A door fell off its hinges and into my path when I was walking down the hallway and I couldn't possibly continue without fixing it and, uh, repainting it...Bye Iruka!" Kakashi said as he hurriedly pushed Sasuke out the door.
Usually, Sasuke would smirk in amusement and ponder how Kakashi managed to come up with an original excuse each time he was late to collect him. Which was every time.
But today, Sasuke's hand found its way to the seal on his neck and he got lost, rifling through his thoughts.
As he tugged on his coat and followed Kakashi out of the building, the words 'no concern for anyone' kept repeating in his mind. He absently wondered if that was really true. He liked Naruto. Well, he liked the feel of Naruto's body against his own, he knew that much. But what else about Naruto did he like?
Thinking hard, Sasuke came to the realisation that he really couldn't answer that question. He tried to pinpoint why he kept talking to his loud roommate, why he kept hanging around him, why they kept...
If Kakashi noticed Sasuke's troubled silence, he didn't comment. As they entered the warmth of C-class, he merely told Sasuke to keep his coat with him. Sasuke stared into space and eventually his hand sank, coming to rest at his side.
Did he really have no concern for others? Sasuke wasn't sure what alarmed him most: the fact that he may not care if everyone around him died again or the fact that he couldn't tell.
Lost in his thoughts, Sasuke paid no attention to the rest of the mostly-stable patients, the nurses, and the volunteer nurses who had started to gather in a loose group.
Above the noise of everyone pulling on their winter coats and snow boots, Kakashi addressed the orderlies: "Kurenai, you'll be assigned Hinata, Kiba, and Shino. Asuma, please take Ino, Shikamaru, and Chouji. Gai, I'm trusting you with Lee, as usual, and also TenTen and Gaara. You'll each have two volunteer nurses to help you."
Ino sulked and folded her arms with a "Hmph."
Asuma looked at her and crouched down. "You just got your clothes privileges back, Yamanaka. You can stand one little outing," he said.
She sighed but Asuma's argument seemed to work. She finished buttoning up her thick, purple coat.
"Sakura, Sasuke, Naruto...you three will be in my group," Kakashi said cheerfully.
Sasuke came back to earth when he heard Naruto's name. He hadn't noticed his roommate's approach, maybe because the boy's orange and black ensemble was mostly covered by a heavy, navy coat that looked far too big on him.
Sakura was also eying it with curiosity. "Is that your jacket?"
Naruto looked a little flustered at this. "No! It's an old one of Kakashi's."
"You don't have your own?"
"That's enough, Sakura," Sasuke said, effectively stopping any more of the pink-haired girl's questions.
She frowned but when she noticed Naruto looking at the ground, realisation spread across her face. She bit her lip.
"Alright!" Kakashi said, clapping his hands and moving towards the exit. "If we're all ready, let's head off. Everyone remember to stay in your teams!"
"Taking us for ice creams in a blizzard...makes you wonder who the real whack jobs are," Sasuke muttered as they walked along the footpath down the street.
The snow had stopped falling and now crunched fresh under their feet. Sasuke tucked his numb hands into his pockets.
"You know, I think it's kind of nice. I mean, I think it's nice to do something nice on Gaara's last day," Naruto babbled, skipping around on someone's once-pristine-white front lawn before a look from Kakashi had him bouncing back.
Sasuke peered at the parade of mental patients and nurses in front of him, his eyes landing on Gaara's red hair, which could barely be seen over the massive gourd strapped to his back.
"Why are they letting him leave? I mean, he is crazy," the dark-haired teen said, his thoughts flickering to Gaara's sandbox of a bedroom.
"He's got an important daddy," Sakura said, her voice a little harsher than usual.
"Inner Sakura," Naruto stated simply.
"Argh! It makes me angry! Just because he's got money, he thinks he can buy Gaara's sanity!" She clenched her fists.
"Well...as long as Gaara has his sand, he's usually okay..." Naruto said, trailing off when Sakura turned to stare at him.
"Ehehe...ne, Sasuke, how was Iruka?" Naruto said, quickly changing the focus to Sasuke, one of Sakura's favourite topics.
Sasuke shot Naruto an irritated look as Sakura's eyes lit up and landed on him. He escaped having to deal with her affections when Lee proclaimed loudly, "WE'RE HERE!"
The ice-cream shop was small, with a handful of old-fashioned booths and tables scattered around the room.
"Gai, you know to keep Lee in check," Sasuke heard Kakashi mutter behind him.
"Oh, fuck!" Kiba yelled for no apparent reason.
"I'll have peppermint stick," Lee said eagerly to the cashier as he hung over the counter.
"Me too. Can I have peppermint stick?" Naruto chirped up.
"Sure," the teenaged clerk said in a bored tone.
"It's just called peppermint," Gaara said irritably from the back.
"Okay. We're just going to have four chocolate cones," Kurenai said, glancing behind at her team for confirmation. Hinata blushed and nodded slightly before looking at the floor. Shino also nodded and Kiba gave her a thumbs up.
"Four cones," the teenager repeated.
"The clerks are new," Naruto mumbled to Sasuke out of the side of his mouth. "Every time we come here, there are always new clerks. No one hangs around after the loony bin visits."
"Sasuke, do you want anything?" Kakashi asked as he waded through the group.
"I'm fine," Sasuke said.
He pulled away from the mob, swerved around the lollipop stand, and moved towards the back of the store. He claimed a booth and slid in, glancing over as he unzipped his coat. Sakura was leaning with her elbows on the glossy counter. She subtly pushed her breasts forward and locked eyes with the clerk.
"Say, uh..." She read off the nametag on the teen's striped uniform. "Ronny. Got any hot fudge?"
"Yes," he said, staring avidly at her.
No outsider could tell, but all the mental patients knew that Inner Sakura was currently speaking. Sasuke still had trouble recognizing the difference between Sakura's two sides but a sidelong glance from Naruto confirmed any suspicions.
Inner Sakura appeared thoughtful for a second. Then she tilted forward slightly and wet her lips to make sure she had all of Ronny's attention.
"Okay, can I have a vanilla sundae with hot fudge and...sprinkles--rainbow, not chocolate--and...hmm, whipped cream, cherries...and...erm..." She paused, seeming to forget the last topping. She looked at Ronny with big hopeful eyes, expecting him to help her out.
The unsuspecting clerk walked right into it. "Nuts?"
At this, Kyuubi couldn't hold it in any longer and gales of laughter escaped him as he fell into hysterics. A ripple of giggles went through the group and Ronny looked around, nervously confused.
"All right, have a seat," Kakashi said. He hid a small smile behind his dark mask as he ushered the rowdy teenaged patients to the tables and booths.
The broadly smiling Kyuubi noticed Sasuke looking his way. Their eyes met and Kyuubi's grin became lascivious. He ran his tongue over his teeth and moved toward his dark-haired roommate.
Sasuke grew wary as the blonde approached him but when the blonde sat down opposite him in the booth, Naruto was at the wheel again. A second later, Kakashi appeared out of nowhere to hand Naruto his peppermint ice-cream and then promptly disappeared.
"Where were you this morning? You weren't in our room when I left for Iruka's," Sasuke asked in his usual nonchalant manner as he rested his elbows on the table and folded his hands in front of him.
"With Haku," Naruto said, punctuating his speech with advances on his ice-cream cone. "He loves snow because it reminds him of when he was a little kid and he still had his mom and dad. Oh! And because of Zabuza, who's this weird guy who visits him a lot..."
Sasuke stopped listening around the second or third word. His throat suddenly felt a bit too dry. Naruto's tongue kept distracting him. It darted out to swipe the smooth ice-cream, swirling to catch stray drops before they dribbled too far down the cone. Naruto continued talking in between licks, oblivious to the effect he was having on his roommate. Said roommate hid a hard swallow behind his laced fingers.
"You never told me what happened with psycho snaky guy yesterday," Naruto prompted later as they lounged on their beds. "I mean this is like his...what? Fourth visit?"
Sasuke rested his chin on his pillow and stared at the wall. Naruto tucked his hands behind his head as he waited for Sasuke's reply.
"He told me I wasn't crazy again and offered to take me home."
Naruto looked over quickly. He hadn't known there were still people Sasuke would consider returning home to.
"So, who is he?"
Sasuke sighed and rolled onto his back. When he finally spoke, it was to the ceiling. "He was a friend of my brother's...He...he's the reason I have this tattoo." At this, Sasuke spared a glance in Naruto's direction. "Itachi was always difficult but he was...worse around Orochimaru. I remember, when I was a little kid, whenever they were over at our house, I'd hide."
"What made snake-guy think tattooing his friend's kid brother was a good idea?" Naruto asked as he pulled himself into a sitting position, still looking intensely at his friend.
"Orochimaru ran some underground operation. Probably drugs or something. And he liked his worker underlings to have a mark." Sasuke fought the urge to reach up and cover his tattoo as he continued reciting his story to the white ceiling. "One day, my parents were out and Itachi and he were bored, and Orochimaru decided I could use the tattoo. And Itachi was...fine with it. That was the last day I spoke to my brother. Then a week later, he..." Sasuke paused and closed his eyes, his face expressionless.
Naruto frowned for a second before catching on. "Oh."
The door opened.
"Checks," Asuma called in, clipboard in hand. "And it's time for evening meds so head over to Shizune."
He left the door open and moved onto the next room.
The two boys slowly hauled themselves off their comfortable beds. Sasuke's eyes were clouded and mostly hidden by his dark bangs. He made to exit their room when Naruto's arms wrapped around his shoulders unexpectedly.
He halted in midstep and stood still.
"Thank you for telling me," Naruto said quietly. "Even if it sucks and it sucks talking about it."
Sasuke's head raised a little and his hands slowly came up to grasp Naruto's forearms.
In a whirlwind of green, Lee twirled past their open door and they heard a crash a second later.
Letting go of each other, they hurried out into the hallway to find Lee sprawled across a surprised Gaara. Lee lifted himself slightly, shaking his head to clear it.
Gaara had landed uncomfortably on top of the gourd strapped to his back. He sat up as much as he could without bumping Lee, who was still on his hands and knees, hovering over the prone redhead. He hurriedly looked back and forth between Gaar and the sandy-looking suitcases outside his door.
"Ready?" Kakashi asked, appearing behind them.
"Now?" Lee asked, flabbergasted.
Gaara's eyes, which had widened to the size of dinner plates at their collision, returned to their normal steely expression.
"Yes, now," Kakashi said as he leaned down to grasp the handles of the two suitcases.
He easily picked them up and walked down the hall towards the doors that would lead them to the outside of the building. Lee's eyes became liquid as his prerogative for histrionics rose to the surface. Tears streamed down his cheeks and he flung his arms around Gaara's small shoulders, crying loudly.
Kakashi glanced over his shoulder and sighed. Gaara breathed slowly as the other boy sobbed into his chest. Slowly, his arm came up to settle on Lee's back.
"I'll write," Gaara said evenly.
Lee's tearstained face looked up to meet Gaara's nonchalant attitude. A joyous smile broke through at full wattage and Gaara got the full force of it.
"C'mon, Lee. Let Gaara up," TenTen said in a friendly voice. She still didn't have her own clothes back; but she looked much healthier.
Lee reluctantly took her outstretched hand and allowed her to pull him to his feet. He then spun on his heel to make the same offer to Gaara. Gaara hesitated and then put his hands on the floor and got to his feet sans assistance. Lee sighed as Gaara turned to follow Kakashi, who was now standing by the double doors.
In a flash, Lee had a hand on Gaara's shoulder and spun the boy around to face him. Much to the shock and/or entertainment of those in the vicinity, he then planted a sudden kiss on Gaara's mouth, dipping the smaller teen backwards like an overly-theatrical Hollywood scene. The redhead didn't have time to react before Lee pulled back and shoved him through the double doors.
"Be free and live in the springtime of your youth!" He called, tears of joy cascading freely down his face as he waved.
Still trying to figure out what had just happened, Gaara followed Kakashi to the outside world in a daze.
A small crowd was gathering around the rec room's east window, the one that faced Konoha Hospital's small parking lot and extensive driveway. Everyone peered out through the chicken wire barrier as Gaara shook Kakashi's hand near the open door of his father's shiny black jeep. Gaara got into the car without so much as a glance behind him.
"It's not fair. It's not FAIR!" Ino yelled at the barred window. Her eyes grew watery and she raced to her room, slamming the door behind her.
"Why didn't Gaara have a roommate?" Sasuke asked Sakura, who was on his right.
"Gaara doesn't do roommates. But if he were staying, I bet he wouldn't be so against it now," she said, with plenty of innuendo and a sidelong glance at Lee to emphasize her point.
"That's enough now!" Shizune called across the rec room. "Everyone line up for meds!"
Things processed smoothly until she got to Shikamaru, who was apparently pretending to have visited the Shock Shop and was sitting completely immobile on the red couch. Other than that, the only other discrepancy was the absent Ino.
After the list was complete, Naruto ambled back to the boys' corridor, Sasuke at his side. Neither spoke though Naruto's face was plastered with a lopsided grin. As soon as they were back inside their room, each spat the pills out into their hands.
Naruto took Sasuke's out of his hand and bounded towards his half of the room. As he tucked the pills underneath his mattress, he noticed the dark-haired boy was brooding on his bed again.
"Hey, know what'll make you feel better? Ramen," Naruto stated, standing in the middle of the room with his arms akimbo.
He took Sasuke's blatant lack of response as a 'I'm flattered for the offer but I couldn't possibly.'
"OH! I know! How 'bout we go to Iruka's office tonight and you can see Itachi's file? Would that help?"
Sasuke blinked in surprise at the suggestion. He nodded.
"Hehe," Naruto chuckled, delighted. He scratched the back of his head and looked at Sasuke, whose dark eyes were staring at him unwaveringly.
"You know," Sasuke said casually, eyes flicking to the door and then back to his roommate. "We're only due for checks every twenty minutes in the evening now. I checked the chart."
Naruto caught the look on Sasuke's face and glanced at the little black digital clock on the side table between their beds.
"Uh huh..." The blonde said distractedly as he quickly did the math in his head. Sasuke had no doubt already done so.
There was a stretch of silence. Each boy impatiently felt every minute silently tick by at a snail's pace.
Sasuke looked at the clock. Naruto looked at Sasuke. Sasuke looked at Naruto and then looked at his navy bed. Naruto looked at Sasuke's bed and unconsciously wet his lips. Sasuke's throat grew a little drier as he remembered Naruto's affair with the ice-cream earlier. Naruto glanced at the door. The nearly palpable electricity between them thickened the air until Sasuke's clothes felt too rough and Naruto's clothes felt too hot. Until finally...
"Checks."
Kurenai looked between the two boys curiously for a few seconds. Then she turned, pulling the door behind her at an absurdly slow pace.
Neither boy breathed. Then the sound of the door clicking shut echoed like a gunshot and the tension snapped with an electric crackle.
Naruto's face split into a toothy grin as he stalked towards Sasuke. He pushed the other boy backwards on the bed with a hand to the chest and climbed over him. Their mouths met in a hurried, fierce passion and each let out a small noise of satisfaction.
Sasuke managed to unzip Naruto's orange and black jacket and shoved it off over the blonde's shoulders and down his back until it fell unheeded on the floor. After Naruto's arms were free, his hands found their way under Sasuke's shirt. The feel of warm hands on his skin contrasted with the cool air and Sasuke sucked in his breath as fingernails dragged over his ribcage.
Sasuke gripped Naruto's shoulders and his legs parted, causing the blonde to fall more onto him. Sasuke grunted softly and Naruto inhaled sharply as their groins came into sudden contact.
Naruto slowly rocked his hips into Sasuke's and the dark-haired teen involuntarily bucked in response. The friction of the gradual, deliberate movement soon had Sasuke twisting beneath Naruto with his head thrown back. Both were panting as their pelvises ground together in synch.
Sasuke's hands entangled themselves in his friend's shock of blond hair. He tugged encouragingly and arched his neck and back into the sensation. Naruto pressed a bite into the side of the pale throat and ground down hard once more and sent Sasuke over the edge. With the dark-haired teen squirming in pleasure underneath him, Naruto soon followed suit and groaned something that sounded like Sasuke's name.
Their rapid but slowing breaths mingled against each other's lips. Sasuke met Naruto's heavy-lidded eyes and he felt his face heat up at the sticky mess in his shorts. He looked away, suddenly bashful, and awkwardly released his hold on his roommate. Naruto took the hint and sluggishly pulled himself off him.
They sat on Sasuke's bed, not looking at the other for a second, both keenly aware that they needed a shower. Naruto hesitated, then made a move to get up. A hand on his shoulder stopped him and he turned his head. Sasuke pressed their foreheads together and wondered if he knew how to love. And if it felt anything like this.
End Part Five