Alucard was merrily trashing things with wild abandon as vampiric midgits in elf costumes swarmed around while a madly cackling necromancer in a santa costume cackled gleefully in a sleigh pulled by what looked like zombie reindeer.
The malls were in chaos as nine humans seemed to become some sort of furry monster with antlers.
"Werereindeer," Anubis muttered to himself as he evaded the herd of rabid looking creatures.
A chain of explosions ripped one with an eerily glowing nose to pieces while shards of silver scattered in all directions.
"Exploding coins?" the egyptian diety asked as Cerberus shrugged.
"Only silver I had on me," came the sheepish reply as Ares was pinned ot the ground with a snapped silver credit card and a flaming checkbook.
A chuckling, golden haired lady shot past on a motorcycle while unpacking a chainsaw that had apparently been grabbed out of Sears.
"You stole my baby!" a big, burly man screamed like a little girl while chasing the lunatic, "Give charly back his Harley!"
"At least it wasn't K-Mart this year," the man said while blubbering though taking a crowbar to one of the vamp-elves.
The stereo system suddenly started screeching something nearly incomprehensible.
"What the," Anubis stated in shock to the music, "Is that twisted Sisters?"
"Nope," thanatos moaned as he spun his sword while pointing to the still bike mounted lady messing with the speakers, "Just my twisted sister Eris!"
"Ah," came the jackal headed ones response before a loud crash followed by a lot of barking, "Was that the petstore?"
A swarm of small dogs swarmed past and into the fray with Cerberus chasing after while muttering about his daughter being the deaht of him.
"Yep," came the response from Azrael as he landed again, "She found the beagles."
The weredeer seemed to drop unconscious as Ares let out an ear splitting belch while messing with his trusty lighter and turned around to moon the necromancer in the Santa costume while moving the lighter behind him.
"Please tell me that lunatic didn't," Thanatos stammered.
"He did," Anubis responded with a groan as a gout of flame from the drunken pyros rear set the villain alight.
"Why do we even go shoping?" Azrael asked with a look of shock, "I mean it always ends in complete and total distater!"
"Honestly," Cerberus said as he nearly collapsed beside the trio as the last of the monsters finally bit the dust, "I really have no clue what so ever!"
"Puppies!" the pink clad toddler diety shouted in the distance as the barking started again.
"Not again!" the former guardian of Hades muttered to himself mixed with various types of curses and swearing under his breath in various languages, "How did Volupta talk me into taking the tot shoping on my own again?"
"Well..." Ares with a wide grin as he'd found some booze that he was attempting to ignite.
"Never mind," dog boy roared.
"You know, we never should have let Diony take that nut to Woodstock," Thanatos stated as the moltov cocktail slammed into the pile of vampire midgits while Anderson joined the fight with his bayonettes against the semi-recovered werereindeer.
"Agreed," Anubis responded.
"Merry Christmas everyone," Azrael muttered to himself as he tried to stop the rampant destruction around the mall.
AN: This is out of continuity, it doesn't actually happen in the story, but its a funny idea for a christmas special for the fic. Just play "Wreck the Malls" while reading it to get alot of the humor. This chapter didn't have a Beta for various reason so if anything is spotted, let me know.
Barranca: Well, she already did burn down a gym even if it was for a good reason.
mchael22: Well, the idea was more of a joke to start with and I had a few characters I wanted to introduce for later use. Anubis and Thanatos will be involved more later on in the actual story.
Firehedgehog: Everyone is a pyro to some extent, I think its a low level trait in all of humanity, its the crazy pyromaniacle tendancies that aren't.
LiYinBlake: Fixed it, my beta and I both missed it, I'm always glad to fix problems of that sort in what I write to make the fic better.
bandgsecurtiyaw: Thanks