Peeta was jarred awake in the middle of the night by a sound straight from his nightmares. A sound he hadn't heard since the Victory Tour nearly six months ago.
Katniss was screaming.
Desperately trying to calm his erratic heart beat as he yanked off his bed sheets, he told himself again and again that she was only having a nightmare, and that if he could just get to her, she would be fine. But rather than the lightning speed he wished to possess, Peeta's movements felt slow, like moving through water, or mud.
He raced down the hallway, and burst through Katniss's door. She was whimpering in her sleep, but he knew the nightmare was far from over. Closing the door softly behind him, he walked to her bedside and gently shook her awake. She jumped nearly off the bed when she woke, and Peeta knew by the petrified look in her eyes that she had truly been terrified. Tears and sweat had co-mingled on her skin and were streaming down her face.
"Katniss, it's alright, I'm here," Peeta said softly, hoping that was what she would want to hear. He rubbed her back gently. "I'm here,"
By this time Katniss had regained her composure. "I'm so sorry Peeta. Did I wake you?"
"Well, technically, yes. But I was having a nightmare too." The room was silent for a few moments, and when Katniss said nothing else, Peeta stated, "Well, if you don't need anything else, I guess I'll go back," and started to walk back to his room.
Katniss caught his hand, though, stopping him. The panic-stricken look had returned to her face, though she tried to keep it hidden. "Will you stay?" she whispered, barely audible.
Peeta's face softened, and his eyes glowed. "Of course," he replied, and climbed into the bed beside her, wrapping his arms around her. When they fell to sleep, neither one of them had even a fleeting sound or image cross their sleeping eyelids that was in the least disturbing.
Gale had heard Katniss's screaming as well, but he had arrived too late. He'd seen Peeta run down the hall, and against his better judgment had watched from Katniss's door as he comforted her. He'd believed that she would turn Peeta away, and that he would be able to give her the comfort she really needed—his. But when she had grabbed his hand and he had climbed in next to her, Gale's heart had twisted painfully, and he could feel the physical burn as they lay side by side.
Disgusted with them and himself, he returned to his room chagrined and depressed. Katniss's boy with the bread was becoming more and more obstinate in his strive for her love. Gale knew he would most likely not be around much longer, so he could care less if Peeta had her after the Games. But not now, in his final days with her. These would be the moments he would bring to mind in the arena, and he wanted none of Peeta's face or voice or presence in his memory then.
Trying to shake off his hateful and disturbing thoughts, he shut his eyes tightly, and tried to fall asleep. Sweet repose would not come though, and images of Peeta and Katniss together and in love flashed through his brain. He grew more and more agitated until he finally jumped out of his bed and stalked out of the hallway. Remembering what Katniss had told him once about the roof, he started in that direction. He looked into Katniss's open door once as he passed, and the last thing he saw was the way his arms wrapped tenderly around her, where his own should be...
When Gale awoke a few hours later, none of his hostile thoughts toward the boy had left. Pushing them from his mind, he rose, showered, and dressed, all before he realized that Effie had not barged in on him this morning, and wondered why that may be.. He was hungry though, so decided to venture into the dining room, because he felt cooped up in his spacious quarters, and wanted to stretch his muscles.
He heard them before he saw them, Peeta and Katniss, talking in the dining room. Their conversation was obviously supposed to be private, given the early hour and their hushed voices. He paused in the hall, where he knew they wouldn't see him.
"—makes me crazy, Katniss. How can we take responsibility for this?" the boy was saying. Gale bristled at his intimate tone.
"I know Peeta! Do you have any idea how much worse it is for me? How much harder it will be if, if—" Katniss's sentence choked off, and a wandering part of Gale's mind was amused at her harsh tone towards the boy. Mostly though, he wondered at Katniss's fear. He had heard it in her voice, the choking terror...
"Katniss, Katniss calm down. Look at me. That won't happen. And even if it does, you know it won't be your fault," Peeta was saying. His voice, if possible, had become even more intimate and gentle and reassuring. Gale couldn't stand it.
He abruptly walked in, startling them. He nodded at Katniss, then continued to the food table. He loaded his plate, though he had no appetite. Silence filled the room as he devoured his food. Between bites he asked, "So what are we doing today?"
Katniss and Peeta glanced at each other. Gale just noticed the boy's uneasy, resigned gaze as it met Katniss's bright, apprehensive one. He wondered what they could have planned for the day. Interviews were tonight, so it must have something to do with that.
"Um, we're each going to help you and Mira with presentation for tomorrow tonight. You'll have three hours with Effie, and five with each of us," Peeta said, and for some reason, Gale sensed a reluctance in him. He enjoyed it.
"Mira and I both with the two of you? As a group?" he tried to clarify.
"No. You and I, and Peeta and Mira. Separately." Katniss looked him square in the eye, daring him to challenge their decision.
He simply smiled and said, "Whatever you say Catnip," and walked back to his room, pleased with the day before him.
Katniss stared at Gales back as he walked away, amused and apprehensive at the time they would spend together. She knew her feelings for Gale pained Peeta, whatever they were, but she could not worry about that right now. The interviews often secured both alliances and sponsors, and she had to focus on Gale now.
So why did it pain her also, to see Peeta looking at her so gently, so resignedly? Why did hot jealousy fill her whenever he spoke to Mira in the tone he usually reserved for her? Why did she have a nagging suspicion that the boy with the bread making his gentle way into her heart, and why did she not want to stop him? All questions she did not want to think about, let alone answer.
Instead, she decided to wake Mira, and warn her about the day's activities. She had been avoiding the girl, and felt guilty about it. She stood and, without warning, kissed Peeta's cheek on her way out. Her cheeks grew warm, but pleasantly so, and he held her hand for a moment while she was within reach. Unable to explain her action, she chalked it up to hormones and stress, because more complicated reasons were too painful and terrifying to think about.
She walked lightly down the hall, knocked on Mira's door once, and stepped inside. Mira was sitting on her bed, looking forlornly out the window, so she didn't notice as Katniss walked in.
"Hello, Mira," Katniss said, deliberately startling her.
"Oh, hi Katniss." She looked around the room, and seeing no one else, asked, "what's up?"
"I'm just here to give you the day's schedule, since Effie decided to sleep in." Not a lie, exactly. "To prepare for the interviews tonight, you'll have three hours with Effie for presentation, and five with Peeta for content." She stuttered over his name, for reasons unknown.
"Oh, alright. Should I get up now, then?" Mira matched Katniss's indifferent tone exactly. She hadn't been oblivious to the surreptitious looks laden with jealousy Katniss had sent her over the week, fleeting as they may have been. She couldn't understand what Katniss could possibly have against her. She had everything Mira wanted. A loving family, a steady life... Peeta...
"Yes, be ready for Effie in an hour," Katniss ordered, and started to leave.
"So I can assume you'll be spending the day with Gale, then?" Mira demanded. Katniss stopped just short of the door.
"Yes, that's right. Now I suggest you get your breakfast; Effie won't wait for you." She strode out the door.
Mira sat on her bed for a few more minutes before going to the dining room. Her heart smiled at the prospect of being with Peeta for a full day, even as her nerves grew raw at the prospect of being interviewed live in front of the whole of Panem in a scant twelve hours.
* * *
Mira sat in Peeta's room, nervously wringing the silky, downy bed cover, as she gazed at Peeta sitting across from her.
"So, do you have any idea of an angle you would like to play in the interview?" he began.
"Angle?" she said dumbly, preoccupied with his sparkling blue eyes.
"Witty, sweet, funny, aloof, humble..." he trailed, glancing at a paper in his hands.
"Oh, no not really. I hadn't thought about it." She looked around, nerves clenching in her stomach. She was making a fool of herself.
"Alright, well that can wait I suppose. Um, good job on your training score. A six, that's not bad at all," he said, looking at her kindly. Her heart sputtered joyously.
"Thanks for making me feel better, but I know I won't get any sponsors from it or anything. It's nothing compared with Gale's ten. That was definitely good, great actually. I'm actually amazed I even got above a three, to be honest," she replied, ducking her head and blushing slightly.
"No, you're doing great, really." He looked like he was gong to say more, but didn't. Mira thought she knew what he would have said though. 'You really have a shot,' or 'You might not lost right away,' or something like that. The fact that he didn't continue only emphasized her own knowledge: that she wasn't a contender in these Games, that the best she could do was go out as herself.
"Not good enough though," she said quietly. So quietly he probably didn't hear her. In any case, he didn't respond for a long time.
She began to fidget, uncomfortable in the silence.
"My mother used to hit me, too." The words slipped out of Peeta's mouth without permission, but he didn't regret them or try to take them back. They needed to be heard. "Not nearly as bad as your father, but she used to slap me when I did something wrong. My friends thought I was so clumsy, because I would come to school with a bruise here, a black eye there." He looked up at Mira, to see if she was following. "So, you're not alone Mira. I know how you feel, at least to some extent." He looked deep into her eyes, holding her gaze so she couldn't look away.
"Thank you," she barely mouthed the words. He simply nodded.
"So, your angle?" Peeta blurted, signifying the moment over. Mira obliged, and they spoke of nothing but her interview, thought the undercurrent of their deep conversation remained with them, unspoken, unseen, but unwilling to be ignored.
Meanwhile, next door in Gale's quarters, Katniss chuckled as Gale impersonated Haymitch from the day before. "KATNISS! PEETA! WITH ME!" he demanded in an over-the-top imitation of Haymitch's voice.
"Stop! He'll hear you!" Katniss laughed hysterically. Eventually she was able to sober down, and as soon as she did they became slightly more serious about Gale's interview.
"So your angle is... what? Witty, aloof, humble, cocky?"
"Hmm... What was yours last year? Simple?" he teased, his grey eyes glinting.
"Shut up Gale! I didn't have one last year, which was bad!": Katniss exclaimed, feigning being offended.
"Alright alright. I'll be serious now." He composed his face rather convincingly, though his eyes and mind were still laughing, laughing with Katniss. Her silver bell laugh played over and over in his mind, and he held dearly to it.
"Hm... that's a good question. You could try being witty," she suggested. "Alright, I have some sample questions here, let's practice a bit. Alright, so Gale, what do you like best about the Capitol so far?"
"You're not serious? Like about the Capitol? The place that's preparing me and twenty-three other kids for slaughter? You've got to be kidding me!" Gale blurted unthinkingly, his voice bitterly harsh. He hoped there wouldn't be a question like that, because he didn't know if he could keep the truth from slipping through his lips.
"Alright, so witty isn't the way to go. Do you have any ideas of what else you'd like to try?" Katniss said quietly, used to his rants.
"I'm not sure. Maybe I'll just wing it."
"Gale please focus here."
He tried, he really did. But Gale's words were lost amid his thoughts, and came out confusing or harsh. Eventually they gave up, and he did, in fact, decide to wing it. So they decided to go to the roof, and enjoy their last hours together, before Gale left her, maybe forever.
"I wish we could stay here forever," Gale whispered to her, a smile evident in his eyes alone, while his face remained serious. He felt ridiculous saying something so trite, but it needed to be said. He looked into her eyes, the exact color as his own, and waited for her to respond.
"I've heard that one," she teased. Katniss didn't want this conversation. She didn't want her feelings to come to the surface, she didn't want to know the song her heart was singing. Facing that would be accepting reality. The reality that her best friend was leaving her, facing death, and she could do nothing.
But she couldn't leave him hanging like this, not when he had confessed his own feelings. So after a few silent moments, she admitted, in a bare whisper, "Me too." She looked at him, memorizing him. The were sitting in the middle of the roof, side by side, basking in the sun.
A lump formed in her throat as she forced herself to realize how immediate his departure truly was. She moved closer to him, and he put his arm around her. She basked in his warmth now, rather than the sun's. "Don't go Gale," she whimpered, willing her tears to stay within the boundaries of her eyes.
He didn't say anything. Neither of them did for a long time. They just sat together, soaking up the others feel, smell, look, everything. The silence was their blanket, and they sheltered in it.
When Gale spoke again, his voice was gruff, and quiet, "Let's go back in." Katniss nodded without speaking, and followed him down. He took her hand on the way to the elevator, and she didn't pull away. He lead her back to his quarters, where they spent the rest of the night, including dinner, together.
When Katniss reluctantly decided to go back to her room, she enveloped herself in his arms, and he held her silently. When they broke away, she kissed his cheek. She had no nightmares that night, only a heavy sadness that settled over her, stealing the warmth that Gale's body had left in her. She slept in cold restlessness.
* * *
The next day flew by, Gale and Mira in wardrobe with Cinna and Portia the majority of the day, leaving Peeta alone with Katniss.
"How was Gale's planning day?" he asked while they sat in the dining room. He hadn't been oblivious to the time she'd spent with Gale yesterday. The whole day they were together.
She took so long to respond, Peeta began to wonder if she'd even heard him. But when he peered sideways at her, her deep grey eyes were shut tightly, as if to hold in all the trauma of seeing her best friend sentenced to death. Just like at the reaping, only a week ago, though it seemed like a lifetime, he was torn between giving her comfort, and keeping his own dignity. Comfort won again, and he took her small hands in his own sturdy ones, and was rewarded with brief eye contact and a squeeze, which may not have seemed like much, but he understood this was all she could offer.
After a few more minutes, she seemed to relax, and she replied, "Not very productive, actually," with a slight smile. "We gave up on angles, and he's going to wing it tonight. What did Mira decide?"
"She's going with humble, I think. Or, shy, I guess. Wow we are terrible publicity coaches," he laughed. His session with Mira had been... awkward.
"Definitely."
They spent the day in each other's company, not saying much, but not needing to. When the time came for the interviews, they were both nerve-racked for the sake of Gale and Mira. They tensely took their seats beside Effie and Haymitch, and hoped for the best.
The interviews held a certain unpleasant feeling of de ja vu for Peeta and Katniss, and Haymitch as well, though they didn't know it. It felt too much like their own games, the monstrous boy for 1 representing Cato, and the tiny girl from there could have been a more fortunate Rue. The twenty-year-old man from 5 seemed very unhappy, because he had a family back home, and he knew they couldn't get by without him. It was apparent though that he would be reluctant to kill, because he felt his age gave him an unfair advantage. Peeta couldn't help liking him, because he could tell his pain was real. When the tiny ten-year-old from eleven went up, the entire crowd was dead silent. He looked so much like Rue...
Then it was Mira's turn. Caesar did his best to make her shine, which wasn't difficult. Her blonde hair flowed down her back in a cascading, golden water fall. Her emerald eyes were rimmed with gold-flecked eyeliner, and even her cheeks were bronzed. Her gown is made of pure cream silk, with lace covering the bodice and trimming the skirt. A soft light seems to emanate from her.
Peeta realized at once how breathtakingly beautiful she truly was.
She spoke about being a merchant's daughter, and how working in the grocery helped her differentiate between edible plants and berries. She seemed a natural at gushing, and her high, sweet voice made everything she said seem lovely. Peeta was proud.
Katniss's heart beat spluttered as Gale went up, and he caught her eye and winked once. He looked magnificent in a metallic silver suit, with cream pocket linings. His grey eyes seemed to be glowing from behind his thick lashes, and his curly brown hair was combed to the side. Katniss's breath caught in her throat at the sight of how handsome he was.
They went through the routine questions, Caesar praised his training score, "A ten! Remarkable! I wish you could tell us how you got that!" and then Caesar asked him the one question their entire party had been unconsciously dreading. The one question that might throw their entire malformed strategy out the window if not carefully handled and answered.
"So, Gale, handsome fellow like you, is there a special girl waiting for you back home?"
Katniss's heart sank, because she knew his answer, and she knew the last thing she told him was to be honest, no matter what.
His answer is her.
She shut her eyes tightly, wishing the moment to go away. But, like most of her wishes, it didn't come true.
"Not exactly, Caesar," Gale said laughingly. He locked eyes with Katniss, silently questioning her. She willed her gaze to give him the right answer.
"Oh, come on! The girl's must be falling over themselves to get to you, good looking lad like yourself!"
Then Gale made Katniss's heart smile, even though it must have hurt his own. "I see what you're doing Caesar! And don't think you can fool me into telling my life's love like you did with Peeta last year!" The audience laughed and laughed, and the cameras found Peeta in the audience, blushing and laughing along beside Katniss, as he wrapped his arm possessively around her and waved them back to Gale.
"Alright sir! You caught me!" Caesar laughed. Then the buzzer sounded, saving them from anything else that could lead to destruction, and freeing them from the public eye for one more night.
A/N: OKay, I am so sorry i took so long to update! I suffered from major writers block/ laziness haha. I kept getting distracted. I only really got inspired tonight, and decided to finish the whole thing :) IT's pretty long, so enjoy it! Let me know if you have any suggestions at all! Especially concerning the Arena! I know what I'm doing, but its kinda boring, so if you have any twists (that involve woods, of course(: ) let me know!! ASAp preferably, so I can start the next chapter, or else I'll have to leave a cliff hanger just when they get in haha. and that won't be fun :( So pleaseee R&R! I really apreciate it :)