Kat shifted groggily, not understanding what had pulled her from her sleep. She glanced at the clock on the table beside her bed and sighed at the bright red neon 3:26, that greeted her. Why was she awake? She had been sleeping so soundly. A sound from behind her grabbed her attention and her sleep fogged brain began to panic.

She wasn't alone. Had Bianca sneaked into her room ? She had done it before, not in a long while, but still it wasn't unheard of. The noise came again and she knew immediately it hadn't come from Bianca.

Spinning quickly to face the source of the sound, her breath caught in her throat when her eyes landed on Patrick Verona laying on the pillow next to her. He was laying on his side, facing her now and his arm was thrown casually over her hip. She hadn't even noticed that until his fingers flexed into her flesh. Nails scrapped her skin causing her to wince. Another sound tumbled from his slightly parted lips and his eyes clenched tightly. His leg jerked under the blanket and almost contacted with hers, but she moved out of his way just in time.

At first the entire thing seemed funny, like watching a dog dreaming while sleeping. The noises he was making were even very close to the sound of an animal whimpering. Then the look on his face struck her and she realized that whatever he was dreaming, he certainly wasn't having a good time. She eased her arm out from under his and used the tip of her finger to try and smooth the crease from his brow. Then she moved to his cheek, stroking his skin and finding it softer than she ever imagined it would be. She knew she should probably try to wake him, help him escape from whatever unpleasantness was besieging him in his mind, but it was a rare moment of tenderness and she hated to break it. Her fingertips glided over his cheek and traced the ridge of his ear before landing in his hair.

His movements had stilled somewhat at her touch and she was happy to know that she was helping him in some small way at least. She let her hand trail through his hair, the soft, silkiness of it was an indulgence too great to resist. She loved his hair, so wild and untamed, just like him, dark and tempestuous.

Her fingers left his hair and followed down the column of his throat. She enjoyed the contrast from the silkiness of his hair to the rough stubble on his jaw. The contrast reminded her of him as well. Dangerous and mysterious, yet at times, when no one was around, he could be so kind and gentle. It was rare that he ever shared that part of him even with her, but she cherished every moment that he gave her. She really wished he trusted her more, shared more of himself with her. She wanted to know everything there was to know about him, but breaking through his walls seemed an impossible feat. She imagined that he felt the same way about her. Neither of them were very forthcoming with their emotions. But then they had both been hurt before. They both knew what it was like to lose something precious to them.

Her fingers left his throat after pausing briefly at the base to feel his pulse thumping against her thumb. It was comforting and reassuring.

At first she hated that. She hated that she felt so safe and secure and peaceful when he was around. She hated that she needed a man to make her feel that way. It had been so long since she felt truly safe and secure. Then it occurred to her that it wasn't about him being a man. It was about him being Patrick. That was what made her feel like she did. It had nothing to do with gender roles and everything to do with feeling so much less vulnerable when he was around. He had a way of quieting all her insecurities and making her feel like she could tell him anything, confess anything and it would never change the way he felt about her. She needed that. She needed to feel accepted. Not just accepted but cherished for being exactly who she was.

She splayed her hand over the expanse of his well defined peck and let it rest there for a moment. Her fingers itched to trail through the splattering of hair that tickled her palm, but she paused, enjoying the feel of his skin against hers. Then she gave into the impulse and let her nail tangle in the course black hair on his chest. It was something she had been dying to do for a long while. Despite their many, sometimes intense, make out sessions, he was never patient enough to just let her indulge in the decadence of feeling him like this. He was, after all, still a seventeen year old male. He had his limits, regardless of being moderately more mature than most of the mouth breathers they went to school with.

She continued to make a trail over his chest with her fingertip. Another noise escaped from him, this one sounding much less like a whimper and more like a moan. She glanced up at his face, dragging her eyes upward reluctantly, and found him still asleep. The crease was gone from his brow now and his eyes were no longer squinted shut. He looked so peaceful and content she carried on with her exploration of his skin. Then he shifted and brought his body closer to hers. His arm tightened around her waist bringing her lower body into contact with his. A shiver ran up her spine as she felt the evidence of what she was doing to him pushing into her thigh. It wasn't the first time she had ever felt him like that, but every time sent a trail of heat straight through her and made her heart bang into her ribcage.

Damn hormones, she muttered under her breath. There was a part of her, a part that was growing larger everyday they spent together, that wanted so badly to give into the temptation that was Patrick Verona. Everything about him was a temptation. She'd be lying to herself if she thought otherwise. She had wanted him from the moment he almost crashed into her door on her first day at Padua High. She hadn't really known it at first. She hadn't allowed herself to know it actually. But she knew now. She admitted it now, even if only to herself. He had been right all along, She was obsessed with him and she was very happy to know that he felt the same way.

She was still looking at his face, enjoying to heat from his body pressed tightly to hers when his expression changed suddenly and a look of panic again replaced the peacefulness. It was so much more intense this time. He began to thrash around restlessly and a bead of sweat broke out across his forehead, soaking his black curls to his skin in an instant. This time she knew she had to intervene.

She moved her hand to his shoulder and shook it gently, not wanting to startle him from his nightmare in fear that he might cry out and wake her father.

" Patrick," She whispered into the darkness as quietly as she could.

He still didn't stir, and the look of desperation clouding his features only gained in vividness. " Patrick," She repeated, a touch louder this time and gave his shoulder another shake.

Still she got no response from him other than another louder groan.

In a last ditch attempt, she shoved his shoulder much more forcefully and called his name as loud as she dared.

He bolted straight up in response as her name tumbled from his lips in what from anyone else would have sounded like a desperate whine.

His head twisted on his shoulders as his hands sought her out and she made sure he found her quickly by wrapping his arms around her as she sat up beside him.

" You were dreaming about me ?" She asked in surprise.

His chest was heaving now and his body covered in a sheen of sweat. " I don't remember. " He answered quickly. "Is it time to get up ?" He asked even as he pulled her closer to him, Clearly the memory of his dream may have been fading exponentially but the effects were remaining strong. His arms folded around her urgently and his heart was beating wildly against her cheek as she laid her head against his chest.

" We have a little while still." She said as she pushed against him to get him to lay back down. "Do you want to talk about whatever that was ?"

He shook his head. " It's nothing." He muttered.

" Obviously." She rolled her eyes and pulled away from him. " Why won't you ever talk to me ?"

He huffed and grabbed the blankets a bit tighter to his chest. " That's pretty rich coming from you." He answered.

" I'm just asking you to trust me, just a little. Obviously you remember some of your dream. Why won't you tell me about it, afraid it might tarnish your tough guy imagine ?"

" I don't want to talk about the damn dream alright. It was nothing and it's over now. Let it go."

" Would it really be so terrible to just let me in a little ?" She asked, not having any intention of letting it go.

" Would it have been so terrible for you to have told me this morning about your Mom ?" He countered.

She snatched at the blankets trying to yank them out of his hands. " And here I thought we were actually getting somewhere." She told him a touch louder than she should have.

" Yeah, me too." He answered at the same volume.

The phone beside her bed began to vibrate quickly causing it to dancing around on the table. KAt jumped in surprised alarm.

Kat snatched the phone and glanced at the screen before hitting the button and putting it to her ear.

" What ?" She demanded harshly.

" I don't know what the hell is going on over there, or who you're talking to but I can guess and if I can hear, it's a sure bet Dad will be able to as well. Maybe you should rethink the time and location of this particular yelling match. Something tells me Dad won't be too enthusiastic about your sleepover buddy." Bianca hissed at her in a whispered tone.

Kat pulled her hand through her hair and shifted, all the anger falling from her face as her heart stopped beating for a moment and her eyes went to the door.

Patrick raised his eyebrows at her in question but she didn't move, listening intently for any movement in the hall.

" Ah, thank you. I'm sorry we woke you up." She muttered into the phone before snatching it off and tossing it back on the table.

" Dad ?" Patrick asked in a hushed whisper.

Kat listened for another minute before finally shaking her head. " No, but we were loud enough that Bianca heard us so maybe we better try a little harder to keep it down."

Kat turned to look at him as she tugged a strand of hair behind her ear. Her eyes fell again to the place that they always landed, right in the center of his bare chest, but she forced herself to look up before he noticed. " Why does everything with us have to be a fight ? Why can't we just get along ?"

He shook his head but remained silent. Finally he sighed heavily, raked his hand through his hair and shifted as if to get out of bed.

" Maybe I should just go. We can talk about this in the morning. This really isn't the place to have this discussion. It sounds like it might be a loud one." He announced as he began to crawl out from under the blankets.

She had no idea what made her do it, but she reached out and grabbed his arm, stilling him immediately. " Don't leave." She said so quietly he could barely hear her and it was almost painful having to force those words out. It would have been impossible to add please to the end of it, though she wanted to desperately.

He turned back to her and gave her a look she couldn't define. There was something in his eyes that was completely foreign to her. Was it tenderness she saw there ? Love maybe ?

He moved back to his spot between her and the wall and settled onto his back, staring up at the ceiling. She shifted so she could look at him and almost laid out beside him, but he started to speak and it stop her cold.

" I'm always running from something. Most of the time I'm alone. Sometimes my Dad is with me. More and more often lately it's you. But whoever it is, they always fall at some point and I don't have time to turn back and whatever is chasing us is on them before I can do anything to stop it." He told the ceiling quietly, never taking his eyes from that point above his head.

Her hand came out on its own volition and rested gently on his chest. " Every night ?" She asked when she realized he had nothing more to add.

" Most of them." He nodded.

" How long ?"

" Since I was ten." He whispered, finally looking at her.

" When your Dad took off," She nodded.

" Yeah, a couple of months after." He confirmed. Then he reached for her and pulled her down next to him. " Can we stop now ?"

She smiled up at him. " Yes. Thank you though. You didn't have to."

He returned her smile before laying a kiss on the top of her head. " It's okay. It wasn't that bad."

" And see, you're still a tough guy." She teased.

He yanked her into his side quickly, drawing a startled sound from her before he kissed her firmly. " I'll show you a tough guy." He announced once he let go of her lips. Then he shifted suddenly and she found herself on her back with him hovering over her.

One of her hands fell to his waist while the other landed in the middle of his chest. His hips settled over hers and she found herself enjoying the weight of him while at the same time the warning bells were screaming in her head. His lips found hers again and he went about kissing all the air from her lungs. Once satisified that she could no longer breath, he dropped his head to her jaw and began to trace it with the tip of his tongue. She groaned at the feeling and pulled hin closer at the same time. He found the pulse at the base of her throat and took a few seconds to flick his tongue over it before sucking gently. She arched into him, wanting him closer, trying to surround herself in his heat. His mouth moved lower, grazing the hemline of her t-shirt with kisses, while his hands strayed to the bottom of her shirt. His fingers grazed her skin as he eased it slowly upwards and she gasped into his mouth when she felt them brush the underside of her breast.

" Patrick." She whispered needlessly. He was already retreating, having felt her body tense under him.

" Shh.." He whispered back, returning to his place on the bed and bringing her back into his arms. "I'm sorry."

" It's okay." She assured him.

" No, I don't want you to think I'm pushing you. Sometimes I just get carried away. I don't think you understand exactly what you do to me." He brushed her hair from her face and began to smooth it with his fingers.

She nuzzled into his chest, letting herself enjoy his warmth. " I don't feel like you're pushing. I know you wouldn't do that." Her voice lowered even further. " I trust you."

He kissed her again at hearing that and when he pulled away his eyes were more intense than usual. "You're right, I wouldn't. I won't ever do anything to hurt you, you know that."

She nodded in response. " I swear I'm not being a prude or anything like that. I know we've both done it before -"

His head jerked up at that and his eyes were full of surprise. " I didn't know that."

" You didn't know that you've had sex before ?" She asked, trying to dodge the bullet from her slip of the tongue. " Weren't you paying attention ?"

" Seriously ?" He raised his eyebrows at her. " Are you really going to try to pull that ?"

" I thought I'd mentioned it before." She said lamely.

He shook his head. " No, I'm pretty sure I would have remembered that conversation."

Her eyes found his chest and this time she let herself just stare as it moved up and down with his breathing. " It only happened once. It was before I moved here."

" I guessed that much since I'm the only guy I've seen you around since you came here. Do you want to tell me about it ?"

" Not really." She answered. " It happened, it's done. Nothing much to say."

" Kat," He drew her closer and nuzzled her hair. " You can talk to me."

" See, I haven't really talked to anyone about it. Bianca knows it happened but she doesn't have the details. My father is blissfully oblivious to the whole thing and it really needs to stay that way." She sighed. " It wasn't a big deal."

He chuckled quietly. " Wasn't a big deal ? I know you better than that. Of course it was a big deal."

" Okay, maybe it was a big deal, but talking about it doesn't change anything. It doesn't make it go away." She answered matter-of-factly.

" Do you wish it hadn't happened ? Was it bad?" He pushed, but it was an easy push, not invading and she knew he was willing to let it drop if she insisted.

She considered doing just that, but then, he had shared his nightmare with her. Maybe she owed him something in exchange. Wasn't that how it was supposed to work ?

" I wasn't always like I am now." She began quietly and he shifted, bringing his face closer to hers so he could hear better. " I was actually a lot like Bianca. I wanted to fit in. I wanted to be popular and have more friends than I knew what to do with. I wanted to date the hottest guy in school and wear all the best clothes. So when the quarterback of the football team asked me to a party with him, I jumped at the chance. I was just a sophmore and I had no idea why he would chose me, but I didn't question it too much. I just went along. Anyway," She shifted suddenly not sure she wanted to continue the story. His eyes were so intense as they watched her speaking she didn't know if she could make the rest of the words come out.

" You don't have to tell me." He told her, seeing her hesitation. " It's okay. I won't push."

She shook her head, encouraged by his understanding. " It's fine. Like I said, no big deal. Anyway, it was at his house. He talked me into staying until everyone left and when they did we started making out on the couch. I had never been in that situation before. He told me how much he liked me and how I was so special and being a stupid barely sixteen year old girl, I fell for the whole thing, hook, line and sinker. The next day was terrible. He wouldn't talk to me, wouldn't even acknowledge my existance. I thought it was me. I thought I was just a horrible lay and it was all my fault." Patrick's hand tightened its hold on her hip and she could see his jaw tense as he clenched his teeth. But she didn't stop talking, it was too late now and it felt good to let it all out suddenly. " A few of his friends tried to get me to go out with them."

" He told them." He concluded on his own.

She nodded in response. " It wasn't long before it was all over school and I spent the next year fending off every guy that thought they could have a turn. So, now you think I'm some super slut, right ?" She sighed and hated the burning she felt in her chest.

She hated that his opinion of her mattered so much. She made a point out of not letting other people's opinion matter. But he wasn't just any other person. He was Patrick and she did care what he thought. She got even more angry as she felt the tears beginning to sting the corners of her eyes.

" I never said that." He answered, tightening his arm around her again. " I never even thought it and I'd kick anyone's ass who said it loud enough for me to hear or even looked like they might be thinking it, even though I know you'd just kick mine right back for doing it. And if it makes any difference at all, you got at least part of what you wanted back then."

She raised her eyebrows to encourage him to continue.

" You are now, in fact, dating the hottest guy in school."

She giggled. She actually giggled. She was pretty sure she had never made that noise before in her life. But the relief combined with his playful joke had caused the sound to bubble out of her without her permission.

He raised his head and his eyebrows as he looked at her. " Did you just-"

" Shut up." She slapped his chest. " Of course I didn't. Must have been Bianca in her sleep."

He chuckled quietly. " Must have been, because I know it couldn't have been you."

" Can we go to sleep now ? It's four in the morning and you have to get up in two hours and get out of here."

" I'm not sleepy now." He told her before kissing her softly.

She put her hand on his shoulder and pushed him back. " Don't start that again. We have to sleep. School in the morning and while you may nap intermittently throughout the day, I can't do that. I'm actually trying to graduate and go to college."

He pulled back and looked at her. " You don't think I'm planning on going to college ?"

She stammered for a moment before answering thinking she had once again put her foot in her mouth. " I didn't mean it like that. It's just that you never seem to take all this very seriously. I just figured you were trying to get through and get out."

" Relax. It's fine." He assured her. " I was just messing with you. Getting through and getting out sounds pretty sweet to me."

" You've never thought about what happens after ?" She asked, subconsciously letting her fingers run through the hair on his chest again.

" I haven't given it much thought really." He shrugged. " Maybe I'll just follow you." She tensed and stopped moving completely, not sure how to respond to that. " Hey," he said, getting her attention again. " I'm not purposing. It was just a thought. I'm not really that into making plans."

" No, it's okay. I just hadn't thought about it either until now."

He kissed her forehead before pulling away and giving her a little a space. " Go to sleep. You're right. You'll be exhausted tomorrow."

She turned in his arms and settled with her back against his chest, tugging his arm tighter around her waist. " Goodnight, Patrick."

She felt him lean into her, nuzzling his nose into her hair. Then his lips found the spot right below her ear and he kissed it gently. " Goodnight, Kat."