Again, this is short, but finals are over and my brain is mush. More soon.

~The Kerl

Chapter 10

"There's a whisper in the air you breathe

Underneath this sky tonight;

There's a piece of you inside my heart

That runs too deep to describe."

– Here With Me, Eleventyseven

Fell

Cadea and I decided to spend the night away from the pack so that she could practice tracking on the way back to the den the following day. That night I did something I hadn't allowed myself to do in a very long time.

I looked at the stars.

The shimmering night sky hung overhead while I sat there with my head reclined to the point my neck ached. The night bugs were singing sweetly, and the only other sounds were the soft breathing of two wolves and the rustle of the dying leaves dancing in a light breeze of the night. Far off an owl hooted as it took off for a hunt. I closed my eyes and breathed deeply, savoring the calm of the moment. There were no clouds in sight as I stared into the heavens.

For a few blissful moments I was able to lose myself in the vastness sky. After a while I tried to remember the stories Brassa told us as cubs, but that time was far too long ago for me to recall anything with clarity. That was when reality broke through my bubble of peace and I lost myself in thought, still looking at the stars. Why can't life be as simplistic as stargazing? I thought to myself. To my surprise a voice that was very distinctly not Morgra's echoed through my mind.

'Stars are our past, present, and future. They are never-changing constants in an unpredictable world. No matter how lost you become you can look to the stars and find yourself. A wolf can never truly be lost, so long as he can look to the sky.'

It was Brassa's voice, I knew, but I did not know when she spoke these words to me. It must have been some time that she'd taken Larka and I out into the night. Perhaps we were frightened of Morgra, so she told us this to comfort her charges. Is she right? Can I find my way again? The very thought made me laugh. I was set too in my ways, no matter whether they were truly my ways or they were Morgra's. No, there was no change left in me.

"Fell?" Cadea's voice was heavy with sleep, and her deep breathing had led me to believe that she was already lost to a dream. "The stars are beautiful, aren't they?" I nodded, afraid to speak. I was becoming far too emotional to allow myself to speak my thoughts. My eyes peeked sideways, catching a glimpse of the she-wolf lying on her back with a contented smile upon her muzzle. "I like to find images in the sky and make up stories about them. See that one there?" she pointed with her paw.

"That one looks like a snake?" Why are you playing her silly little game? Morgra wanted to know. I didn't answer the voice.

"A snake? No, the one that looks like a rock!"

"A rock."

"Yes, though now it looks more like a boulder. You see it?"

"The boulder." She is entirely out of her little mind.

"Yes."

"A boulder?" You are even more deranged than she is. Why are you listening to this?

She laughed. "I see your point. Maybe that was a bad choice. Still, it is part of the game. You start."

"You want me to make up a tale about a boulder." Listen to me, Fell.

"Yes. Now."

I wanted nothing more than to tear her tail off for even making the suggestion, but something in me, some part of my brain that failed to work properly or use logic when it should made me do it. This part of my brain did not insist that I be pleasant about it, though. "Alright. Many years ago there was a mountain. The earth cleaved, forming a great chasm in the center. There was a portion that remained, forming a bridge over the chasm that stood the test of time and nature, until last year when my sister was on it and collapsed, burying my sister in rubble and dropping a large boulder on top of Morgra. The boulder is still there." You are far too sadistic to live the life of a simple varg, Fell. The Balkar would welcome you as their leader if they didn't want to kill you. "How was that?"

"It wasn't bad for your first try. We shall have to work on- " My movement stopped her talking. I was on my feet, ears perked and nose quivering. I bit back the snarl building within me. To her credit, Cadea did absolutely nothing. She clamped her jaw shut, remained lying prone on her back, and did nothing to alert the stranger to our position. We waited for the muted sound of crunching leaves that signaled retreating paws. "What was that?" she whispered once the stranger was gone.

Stay where you are or leave. Either way, you are dead. "That was our sign to warn the pack."

"You mean the Balkar found us?"

"The Balkar found me. Now go warn the pack. Tell them to get as far away from the northern pack boarder as possible." I made to trail the spy but Cadea leapt in my way. I pulled up sharply and snarled on instinct. Who did this she-wolf think she was? "Cadea, go. NOW." It was up to her to get my family to safety. If the Balkar wanted me, they could have me.

Cadea bristled. "You're crazier than I thought if you expect me to go after them and leave you for cub scraps. I'll come with you." Force her Fell. Force her to obey.

"Absolutely not. You just learned how to hunt. What in the Red Meadows makes you think you can fight?" Before I knew what happened, Cadea had me on my back, her jaw wrapped around my throat. I choked back a growl as Cadea huffed in annoyance, stepping back to allow me up.

"Because I can fight," she spat out. As annoyed as I was, I couldn't help but admit that she was quick. "And I will fight, but what you are planning is sure suicide. I am sure that your family will fight as well, I –"

"I am going alone, and for your and my family's sake you should get them away as fast as you can. The Balkar are coming, Cadea. Try to understand that. They want me, not my family."

"And what makes you think that the Balkar will not hunt them down after they leave you for the flying scavengers? You forget yourself, oh Dark One," she warned, "that I was raised in the rebel pack. I may not have had to hunt for myself but I held my own in Slavka's games. As a young cub I was like clay beneath her paws. She molded me into what I am and I thank her for that. I can help you, Fell, but only if you allow me to. Now, what's it to be?"

Kill her now and be done with it.

Larka

The way his ears perked and his eyes shot open implied that my question startled him, but his lolling tongue and thumping tail gave away his true feelings to the matter. I humored him with a soft smile. If I hadn't been resting against him he would have been on his feet. At the last moment he tried to catch himself and contain his anticipation, but Kar was never good at expressing his emotions in ways that were not blatantly obvious. "Honestly, I haven't thought about it," he lied. "The fact that we are free to live normal lives is still too new to me to even consider planning a future, let alone with you. Have you?"

"Have I what?" I asked through a slitted eye. I didn't want to wake up from my nap.

"Have you thought about it?"

"Yes."

"Yes?"

"Yes."

"And?"

"And what?"

"And what did you think about?"

"Not much. Right after I realized I wanted to think about, I almost died."

"Oh."

"Oh?"

"Oh… Hey, when do you think Fell and Cadea will come back?"

My ears flopped as my head shook. "I haven't a clue. I wish I could just look into the water like before. If I could, maybe I would see something to calm Palla. She's terrified he won't come back and that we will chase after him."

"I wouldn't worry too much. Besides, we were bound to leave the pack some time."

That woke me up. I twisted around to look over my shoulder and meet his gaze. His head rested on my back as we lie in the tall grass as the sun soaked our coats. "Were you?"

He balked. "What do you mean?"

"If I hadn't come back – if I really was dead – would you have left the pack?" I knew that as soon as I returned there was no doubt in anyone's mind that we would leave together. Fell had already gone, but I knew that Kar was revolted by the idea of living the life of a Kerl. Would he have found another pack? I waited for a response from him. His silence was answer enough.

"I've been thinking," I whispered after a while.

"About what?" He sounded worried, perhaps by the previous conversation.

"I really think that we need a new plan of action. We ran the last time and look where that got us: we were split up and hunted like foolish Lera. Cadea has seen them – she can tell us everything we need to know."

Kar jumped to his feet and began pacing back and forth, his tail down and his ears flat in a worried expression. "You want to go after them." It wasn't a question.

I stood up in his way and forced him to stop, meeting his eyes before answering. "Yes."

"You think that Fell will let us help him, and the three of us will track down a pack of fighting draggas who want to kill us all." Again, it wasn't a question, but there was doubt in his tone.

My head wagged in disagreement. "Not quite. We know that Brak wants Fell dead, and whatever reason they have to kill him probably involves me. I doubt that they are after the rest of the pack."

Agitated, he shook his head. "Well it is not as though I am going to let them come after the two of you without putting up a fight. You should know that." I rubbed my head beneath his jaw and assured him I did know. "Still, you think that Fell will allow us to help him?"

I shook my head, again rubbing against him. "No, but Fell really does not have a choice, does he?"

"I suppose not, no, but he is sure to make helping him difficult." I agreed with him, but only optimistic thoughts would give us any hope to stand up to him.

A sudden thought occurred to me. "Kar, I need you to try something for me. Fell and I have a theory about what is happening to Cadea, but we have yet to test it…and for that I need your help."

Without any further explanation I darted deeper into the woods. I paused momentarily to make sure he was behind me before focusing on my search. An agitated chorus of flying scavengers caught my attention and I headed towards the source of the ruckus. Perfect.

I slowed my pace to a crawl and peered through the bushes at the scene before us. Buried betwixt the roots of an old tree was an old carcass, probably one that Huttser and Palla hid some time ago. A flock of crows were busy unearthing it, fighting to tear off little pieces of the maggoty flesh. I felt Kar at my right and met his questioning gaze. I jerked my head towards the scavengers and concentrated on them.

"Lovely, maggoty feast for us, drearies!"

"Nice and ripe."

"KAW! My foot!"

"Perfect waste it is, burying it."

"Juicy maggots. Yellow bone and juicy maggots."

"KAW be to Wolfbane, provider."

"Stupid fool."

"Yellow bone, juicy maggot."

"No Wolfbane. Lies, all lies."

"Want not, waste not."

"My KAW! Tailfeathers."

"Evil lies."

"Morgra lies."

"Morgra dies."

"Juicy bone, yellow maggot."

"Fools, all fools."

"Morgra died."

"Stupid Varg know nothing."

"White wolf die too."

"White and black under attack."

"Yellow juicy maggot bone."

"Peck the crack, find a snack!"

"Haste makes waste."

"Someone say the blessing."

"Jellow yone muicy baggot."

"Fell fell in hell well. Yell tell not well well."

"Said well," the rest chorused.

"Peck in!"

"Wasted KAW!"

Shaking my head at the lunacy of the conversation I tried to catch Kar's attention. Instead of acknowledging me he remained frozen with his eyes focused on the filthy flying scavengers. I nudged his side and he jumped to his feet, sending the crows into a frenzy as they leapt and screeched and hurled insults towards us for disturbing their meal. Kar tracked their retreat to the sky before meeting my gaze.

"I'm not quite sure I understand how a rhyme about Fell's demise equates to giving thanks for a maggoty corpse." He hesitated, unsure how to fully process what he'd just witnessed.

Or experienced.

Fell and I were right.

"So what you are telling us is that Kar can hear birds speak as well." Huttser's great head rocked back and forth in a slow manner, as if this action alone would help him to better understand the situation. "I suppose I shouldn't be surprised, but then I'd hoped this thrice accursed thing would die with Larka and Fell. Besides, I thought that you had to be born with the ability, that it wasn't catching like an illness." Palla nodded along with her mate. The cubs were puzzled as well. What little they knew of the Sight had come from Palla and Huttser trying to hush their quell their curiosity, or from Kar who barely had any understanding of the mysterious power.

"I swear to you Huttser, I heard them fussing like a pack of old nurses."

Huttser gave a sad smile. "Of course, I don't doubt you did. My fear is that more and more will experience the same thing."

"Fell and I do not believe that is the case. While Huttser and Cadea are growing in the Sight, Fell and I are having more difficulty controlling what we see. It is almost as if they are gaining the power we are losing. There is no way to – " I felt a sudden tingling sensation that I'd only ever experienced twice before.

Larka.

Skop nudged me. "What is it, Sister?"

Larka.

"I don't know Skop. It feels like – "

They're coming.

"Larka? Can you hear me?"

If you can hear me, I need you to warn the pack. They're coming.

"Yes," I whispered.

They know I am here. They are going to hunt us down.

"Fell…"

"Fell? Is he – " The others asking questions rapidly, but I couldn't single them out.

You need to move them. Run as fast as your legs can carry you and leave. Run south. Keep them safe.

"He says we should leave. He says they are coming."

"Larka. Larka, listen to me. Tell him we are not running away. He doesn't have to do this alone."

I know…We will meet you below the Stone Den at nightfall. Larka, do what you can to dissuade them.

I shook myself as the connection severed. When I looked around I saw my family was huddled close, staring at me. Skop and Khaz were bristled in anticipation. Larka was attempting to comfort Kipcha. Kar's eyes were knowingly determined, and our parents were prepared to rush off to defend their wayward son. I took a moment to absorb it all. I had never before held so much love for my family. The fact that Fell wanted to protect them by sacrificing his own well-being told me he felt it too.

Taking solace in the presence of my family, I gave them our options.

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