Because Fell is quite poetical, but not the sort to jump into a circle and share his feelings, I jumped around to a few more POVs than I'd planned. I hope it doesn't bother you too much.

And thanks to all of the new readers for the comments! Those are the M&Ms during the movie – they aren't necessary but make the experience a lot more enjoyable :D

~The Kerl

Chapter 12

"And I hear them saying you'll never change things,

And no matter what you do it's still the same thing,

But it's not the world that I am changing –

I do this so this world will know it will not change me."

– The Change, Garth Brooks

Larka (the other one)

The days that followed were noticeably different than those of the past few months. Never before had our family worked in tandem as we did in that meadow. True, we were preparing to fight for our lives, but from the brief glimpses into the past I'd caught from our parents and Kar, imminent danger was nothing new to the pack. Through everything they had prevailed, yet it was not until now that they appeared to realize that nothing could stand in the way of 'The Family'. Now it was my turn. It wasn't that I felt the need to prove my worth, but more that I wanted to test myself. I know my siblings were just as eager.

Much to the amusement and distraction of Kar and Fell, Larka and Cadea were sparring across the way. Larka was swift and strong, but Cadea's smaller build and training gave her an added agility that my fair sister lacked. They were evenly matched and it was good for us to observe them. My brothers growled in appreciation as their moves became more complicated and unpredictable. Cadea charged at Larka, coiling to spring. Larka rose to meet her in the air, but rather than leaping Cadea skipped forward and rolled beneath her. As soon as her mouth closed around my sister's thigh Larka twisted in the air and landed heavily upon Cadea. The younger wolf yelped, releasing her hold and giving Larka the opportunity to hold Cadea in place with her forepaws, panting muzzle inches from Cadea's exposed throat.

Skop nipped at my shoulder. "I want to try that." I shook my head as Cadea recovered. Larka and Cadea were practiced fighters – there was no way we would be able to copy their movements. We watched as they tried to convince Fell to join their sparring, something about needing to practice fighting in groups. Kar urged him to participate, and while I would never admit it I was curious to see what my brother was capable of. Skop began whining. "But you have to. Kipcha won't spar and I fight with Khaz all of the time."

"I will too spar," snorted Kipcha. She was always sensitive to the jibes of our brothers, and also more bark than bite.

"Yes, but you won't be any good," he countered.

"Who says?"

"I do."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah."

"Skop, stop picking on her." Cadea had given up on Fell and joined us instead. "Kipcha is small enough to do some serious damage."

"Really?"

She nodded towards Fell, who pouted as Kar and Larka laughed about some joke I didn't catch. "Did you see how Larka wrongly anticipated my attack and moved too early?" Kipcha nodded as 'Yes'. That simple mistake allowed me the opportunity to counter her. I want you to do the same thing to Fell." Kipcha's eyes shot open wide.

I laughed. "But won't he expect her to try something like that since he just saw you do it?" How were we to anticipate him wrongly anticipating Kipcha's attack? "He's the mind-reader – not us."

Cadea smiled wickedly, sending chills up my spine. "Perhaps, but we can read other things about him."

"What other things?" asked Khaz.

"Well, we know that your brother is an older, stronger male. He has more experience fighting and will, in most cases, win any fight against any attacker."

The loud groan came from Skop. "So what makes you think that Kipcha should – or could, for that matter – tackle him?"

"Kipcha will get away with it because Fell will underestimate her. And so will the Balkar. They will underestimate all four of you. You are younger, less experienced, and more likely to be intimidated by their male prowess. This is something we can count on, and we can use this to our advantage." Kar and I nodded, but Skop was still not convinced. "Here – let's test our theory. Kipcha, you rush at him like I told you to. Skop will run with you to distract Fell. He will expect Skop to tackle him and will not pay attention to you. If Fell tries to correct himself in the air like Larka did, Skop will tackle him. If Fell suspects that you plan to trick him and does not jump, then Skop will leap to attack and Kipcha will continue to charge him." Khaz caught my eye. If nothing else, it would be amusing to watch Fell put Skop in his place.

Skop, excited to finally test his skills, nudged a reluctant Kipcha forward and rushed out brother. Larka saw them coming and barked a warning. It was soon enough that Fell was able to spin around into a defensive crouch. Just as Cadea predicted, Fell ignored Kipcha and rushed to meet Skop's challenge. Fell pounced, Skop dodged, and Kipcha attacked. She hit him from the side, knocking the wind from him and sending him to the ground. Fell struggled to regain his footing but Skop was already scruffing him. The black wolf snarled, upset that his younger, smaller siblings had managed to best him. Skop, with a pompous smirk on his face, stepped back and allowed Fell to get up. From all that I'd heard and observed of my brother I was unsure how he would react to the situation. Would he manage to control his temper enough to flee, or would his anger get the best of him and lead him to attack? Either option seemed likely, but none us were prepared for what actually happened .

He laughed. So hard that he dropped to the ground, shaking and barking with it. He caught his breath, but upon seeing Larka's astonished expression his composure broke and his good humor continued to our immediate bewilderment. Skop backed away in dislike of the situation. Kipcha was frozen in place, her fear too great.

Fell

A force stronger than myself, more persuasive than Morgra, and more tantalizing than the smell of new grass had me in its grips. I was entirely at its mercy and without a prayer to regain control. I recalled the way wolves squirmed as I tortured their minds, the way they seized up and were completely under my control. While my mind urged, begged my body to obey, there was nothing I could do to. My chest and belly ached in protest, unaccustomed as I was to losing all sense of myself. My lungs burned from shortness of breath. Whatever had me clutched in its jaws was surely going to kill me. And the worst part was that I couldn't bring myself to care. I enjoyed feeling this way.

One look at Larka told me all that I needed to know – I'd officially gone insane. But then why was Kar smiling like that? Kipcha was frightened, and little Larka was staring at me so intently that I nearly sobered up until I realized that two Larka's thinking I was crazy was far more humorous than one and lost it all over again. Laughter – uncontrollable laughter was something I was largely unfamiliar with. The new sensation tickled my insides and outsides equally.

The moment came when I felt the feeling was too much for me alone. It was echoed by another body again and again and again until all of the wolves in that clearing were prostrate on the ground, shaking with laughter. It was infectious. What's going on? We were days away from what we suspected was an imminent massacre and I was just pinned by my younger siblings and we find this to be amusing? Surely it was a bad omen… And yet I found that our situation did not upset me in the slightest. I was elated.

I laughed because the family that I was most concerned about protecting had just bested me, revealing how idiotic my concern had been. I laughed because my sister's face implied she'd stumbled upon a skunk's love nest, rather than seeing a grown varg incapacitated by his own good humor. I laughed because Kar laughed, though I had no idea what he found so funny. It was probably me. I laughed at that. Yes, I was laughed at the fact that I was laughing.

Not since my early cubhood had I ever come close to experiencing this feeling. The painful hate constricting my heart was gone. I felt dizzy, as though I drowned in the sky and longed for the earth to ground me. Perhaps a better description was that I had startled from a deep, troubling sleep and found that I was so safe it was lunacy to be worried by a bad dream.

Morgra was finally gone. I was free.

And it was time the Balkar were freed as well.

The part of my brain still functioning properly wished that they would find us here; that they would see me this way. According to Cadea they were worried that my sulking about the dark forests would be cause for alarm and inspire another power-crazed wolf to go the depths Morgra had. I was resolved to avoid a fight, but it was not until now that I felt confident we could manage it. The key would be to show them how I had changed, I supposed. Fenris knew if this change would hold, but I prayed he would give me a sign.

It was strange how, with everything that had happened over the past few years, I was so utterly convinced in the existence of our gods. I knew all-to-well that there was life beyond this. We had all seen the Searchers. It was ironic for me, having thought I was Wolfbane or some ghastly equivalent, to know that beyond the tales Brassa told us and the lies Morgra concocted that Fenris looked after his own. Tor, who supposedly had favorites among the Varg, must be equally as real – how else were we to explain Larka's surviving? Or Kar's? Or my own? And not only that, but we were living. There was no other explanation.

That was another thing I needed to talk to Larka and Kar about when I managed to regain my sanity. For the time being I was content to roll around in the meadow with my family. Some time later Huttser and Palla found us slumped on the ground, worn out by whatever had happened to us. The looks on their muzzles suggested that they wanted an explanation for our lax behavior, but a harsh cry broke the air. I searched for its source even though we all knew who it was before we saw him. Larka called out to him and he flitted down to us to awkwardly land in the long grass of the meadow.

I stepped forward and lowered my head to the eagle in acknowledgement. Cadea and Kar did the same, while the rest of the pack circled around behind us. Larka stepped forward and bumped him with her nose in greeting. "Hello, dear friend. It is good to see you again."

Skart's head bobbed. "And you. I'm glad to see you back to your old self…or at least well-fed and in your right mind." His beak cracked in what I imagined was the equivalent of a smirk at his joke. He coughed and ruffled his feathers before glancing around at the others. "As much as I wish I came with good news I'm afraid I've brought a warning – the Balkar are on the hunt."

My tail bristled. "How near are they?"

His head tilted to the side in consideration. "If they continue at their current speed and don't hunt along the way, then I imagine that they will be here before tomorrow's moon. They are coming from the forest north of this meadow, so there should not be anything to slow them down."

"Did you get a count, Skart?" The question startled him, or rather the fact that Kar asked it startled him. His gaze shifted between Kar and Cadea before sweeping my younger siblings, as though he expected them all to begin speaking with him. Kar ignored Skart's surprise and patiently waited for an answer.

The old eagle replied that he had, in fact, noted that there were only six of the eight present when he'd left them. "Of course I had no idea what they were talking about, only that they are primed for a fight. Perhaps they will regroup with the others on the way?"

"Maybe…I suppose we will have to plan for all eight of them and consider ourselves lucky if the others do not join them." I thought about the odds we would be facing and was not too worried by what I saw. Our number were greater and we had another day to plan. "Our ten against Brak's eight would be about even, although our chances of talking them down would be greater if there were only six. No offense to the young killers intended, but they will not be intimidated by the four of you," he added with a smile. Skop snorted and Larka nudged Kipcha.

That was when I saw the dumbstruck look on Skart's face. At least I assumed it was dumbstruck – I was not as well-versed in avian expressions as Larka. "What do you mean when you say 'talk them down,' exactly? You're not really considering a compromise, are you?"

Larka cut off my response, saving me the trouble of arguing with a bird. "We're done, Skart. We don't want to fight."

"What if time has not dulled their temper? They seek Fell to destroy him, not talk."

"True, but we must convince them that Fell is no longer a threat."

"And if you cannot?"

"If talks fail, then we will show them that I am a threat."

The remainder of the day was spent in preparation for the upcoming confrontation. Cadea and Huttser sparred with the younger wolves. Kar and Palla scoured the area for places to hide. Larka and I practiced our initiating and breaking our mental link. Even Skart helped out by finding potent vegetation to mask our scent. This was going to work. It had to. The consequences were too severe were we to fail. Long ago I accepted the fact that my life was bound to be a dismal failure, so I was not concerned with my future. It was the others…and the Balkar. If they succeeded, and they managed to kill out those with the Sight – there were now four of us – then the Sight would be forever feared. The Balkar would look upon themselves as peacekeepers and would hunt down liars.

That was what they'd been when Morgra corrupted their ranks…

The busy day soon settled into a cool, lazy night. Skart went off somewhere to nest until the morning. With the summer drawing to a close the pack huddled in the shadow of a fallen tree, though I noticed that Larka and Kar had gone off a ways to whisper in secret. They suit each other, I told myself. Questions began racing through my mind at the sight of them: how long would it be before they left to stake out their own pack territory? Where would they go? Would I ever see them again? It was only natural curiosity on my part, but far more difficult to face than it should have been.

I didn't begrudge my sister her happiness – I was truly delighted that, despite all of the obstacles they'd found a way to each other again. Kar made Larka happy and she returned the favor. For a moment the future – rather the possibilities of the future – opened up before my mind's eye. A heap of squeaking fur squirmed between the two in a dark, earthy den. Larka wore a tired smile while Kar's grin threatened to split his head in half. There was Kar later, his attentive cubs curled up with their mother, captivating his audience with some new tale of his own creation. Kar would toy with their emotions as he went along, and Larka would shake with poorly contained laughter as she worked out the secret meanings behind his words. They would lead an ideal life.

It was something I would never dare to dream of for myself.

Surrounded by my family as my eyes grew heavy, I could only pray that the rest survived so that they could find their own happiness. I didn't deserve it like they did. Different as I felt from before I could not allow myself to imagine that my past was forgotten enough to pave the way for a bright future.

Larka

"I never thought I would say these words," Kar sighed, looking at me from the corner of his eye, "but I think that Fell stands a chance." The eye winked at me before shifting its gaze towards the sky.

My head tilted on a stretched neck in an attempt to better see his face. It didn't help, but I did see his lip quivering as he bit back a smile. "Would you care to explain?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"Well...What if I'm wrong?"

"Wrong about what?"

"What do you think?" he chuckled, as though the answer lie just beyond my nose.

"Have you ever noticed how infuriating it is to have someone answer you with a question?"

"Does it really bother you that much?"

"It doesn't bother you?"

"What doesn't bother me?"

"The fact that you tried to distract me so easily. You should be ashamed," I joked.

He shook his head, rolling into me as he did so. "Only if it worked."

"It didn't."

"I'm still not going to tell you."

"You meant Cadea, didn't you." He tried to keep a blank expression, but his raised brow gave him away. I chuckled. "Didn't I mention it before?" His muzzled lowered as he took in my features with a look of skepticism. I winked back and leant in with an even lower voice. "I can read minds."

He buried his muzzle between us in a poor attempt to muffle his laughter. Looking back to the pack I saw that none of them seemed to have been disturbed. I shifted to my side and placed a foreleg over him anyways, drawing him into a semblance of an embrace. Willing he obliged and moved to lie over my other foreleg and rest his head next to mine, partially pinning my body the cold ground. The dying grass rustled beneath us and I couldn't help but think of how different this was to our last encounter with the Night Hunters. That night I'd been plagued by the near certainty that I would die the following day. Kar had been there with me, but the closeness of the moment was absent then. Now she was surrounded by family and was curled up with her mate beneath the stars. What more could she possibly ask for?

Her mind circled back to Kar's comment, and Kar's voice made her jump as he gave voice to her thoughts. "I didn't want to say anything in case I was seeing things that weren't real, but Cadea has been very good for our brother."

His nose bumped mine and my lip curled in a smile. "Yes, she has. Though I think that he has done her more good than she has done him."

"Really?"

I nodded. "You should have seen her with Rar's pack. The others picked fun at her. She couldn't hunt for herself, and her brother was upset that she would never find a mate to take her. He did not want her as a burden and she knew that he felt that way. Of course he never said anything, but it was evident that the shadow of the feeling was there. At least while I was there she felt useful, but I'm afraid I was poor company for her."

"She doesn't seem to think so."

"That only proves how sorry her situation was. With Fell it was his past that haunted him and there was little we could do – healing was up to him. Cadea's present was what held her prisoner and she could not escape it. She has always been strong-willed, but what is the point of that when you must rely upon others as she did? No, she has benefitted from him as much as he has from her." It was hard to look back on those bleak times for me. Especially when life was going as pleasantly as it was. Yes, a pack of bloodlusty males was making its way towards us at that very moment, but I couldn't find it in myself to care. We had a good plan, and I was not going to let anything come between myself and the future of my pack.

My brow raised in question at the look he gave me. "I wonder what Fell plans to do about the situation." It wasn't a question, but we were both wondering the same thing.

Kar's tail thumped in time with the slow beating of our hearts. I felt the air building up within him just before the sigh passed his lips. His breath hung on the air, mingling with mine. "Do you think that the Sight would grant you one last vision after tomorrow?"

My brow furrowed. For all I knew I'd already used up my last vision. "What is it I'm supposed to look for?"

He shrugged. "I was just wondering where we were supposed to go once this is all over – I've no idea where we should start our family, let alone spend the winter. A few of the rebels I talked with came from the south and liked it there well enough, and we've spent so much time in the north… Honestly, I would be perfectly happy to never go there again." He shuddered, making me laugh.

I inched closer, soaking up his warmth. "You only say that because you spent your time in the mountains. The forests are much nicer."

"I don't have particularly fond memories of the forests, either. Too warm for my liking."

"When they were on fire, yes," I chuckled, picking at a bur tied up in the fur between his shoulders.

A contented growl preceded his words. "Yes, but the fire was far nicer than the mountains."

"Really?" He had told me of the strange dogs he'd met, and of the long winter and of Skop's passing. Of the bats he rambled on to and how he had forgotten to care for himself properly. 'I chewed stones to pass the time, I recalled him saying.

"Somehow I managed to convince myself that because I was unable to find you, you were dead. That the world was dead. At least in the burning trees I was still myself."

"You know, that's another thing the three of us have in common." I was surprised the thought hadn't struck me before.

"What, losing our minds?"

"Yes. Fell thought our cubhood was a dream and was reborn as Wolfbane. You tried to make friends with bats in some secluded cave in the mountains, and I forgot everything entirely."

He opened his mouth to say something but changed his mind at the last second. I shot him a look and he grinned. "I was going to say that you should at least be grateful that you didn't go crazy when you lost your mind, but then I remembered that you let a human ride on your back like one of those ugly Herla. Clearly that's more insane than communing with flying rats."

Next chapter will hopefully be the end of the Balkar. Please R&R!