… I think I electrocuted myself Thursday night… or is it Friday morning since is was like 12:50 am… It felt weird, but not necessarily painful.
Gomen, Gomen for not updating Thursday. I had an English essay to write and a History project to finish. It took me forever to find the right psychological illness I was looking for. And then I had to do my poster board and write my note cards and find an actual case and some quotes. Bleh.
You can ask my friend, not that she's on fanfiction, but on Wednesday, in gym class, I'm like 'it should totally end with Brennan getting on a plane and flying away.' XD and it did. Anyways… I liked the ending. Especially when she's saying goodbye and is like 'I love you too Hodgins.' And then Booth is his army uniform… Caroline was sad for them ): You could see it in the way she looked at Booth.
One year (bones time)… SEASON 6 SHALL BEGIN! WOO! I'm putting my money on Booth kissing her at the reflecting pool. Or something totally crazy happening. But then again, when does something totally weird and unusual not happen to Booth and Bren?
Disclaimer: I do not own Bones or NCIS. I'm just 'borrowing' these characters and intend to return them... fail. I do not intend to return them, meaning at the end of this story they shall be forcibly wrenched from my grasp and returned to their rightful owners. Life sucks sometimes, doesn't it?
"Here we are, all of us, basically alone, separate creatures, just circling each other, all searching for that slightest hint of a real connection." You could live your life always sacrificing what you want for the more practical, less expensive, less frustrating element.
The thing about settling for second best is it's, well, second best. Yes, you can be happy with the lower model car, the higher paying job doing what you hate, or the weaker, but effective stick of glue. But the thing is, once you've had a taste of the best, second best is just… second best.
Is it really fair? To lose the best, the one you want to spend your life with, the one who holds half of who you are and move to another in turn. One who will love you and be happy. Sure, you could be happy, but every touch, every glance, every shared moment will remind you of the thing you lost.
Sweets office was crawling with children, literally, well to some extent. Parker and Sirree crawled around on his floor playing who knows what game while Hollie sat on his couch. Sweets himself sat on a chair he'd placed in front of his desk. He found that patients were more open to talking when you didn't question them from behind a desk. The chair seemed to make them more comfortable.
"So," Hollie began. "You're a psychologist?"
"Yes I am. I would assume that would be obvious because this is my office after all."
"How old are you?"
"Twenty-Seven."
"You look 10." Parker and Sirree giggled.
"Pst," whispered Parker. "Let's play a prank on Sweets."
"What should we do?" Banana had to concentrate to keep her voice low. Her sister never let her prank anyone.
"My dad gave me a screwdriver to keep with me. Let's break his chair." (After Hero in the Hold, it makes sense.)
"Yeah!" Her excitement got the better of her.
"Yeah what?" The poor psychologist didn't suspect a thing.
"We're gonna ask big sister Saffi to bring us for ice cream when we're done here!"
"Oh." Sweets looked like he wanted to come, but held his tongue. What would Agent Booth think of him if he started hanging out with children. The comments and insults would just get worse.
"So, do you have a girlfriend?"
"I have a fiancé." (OMG I felt so bad for Sweets D=)
"What's her name?"
"Daisy."
"Like the flower?"
"Yeah."
"Is she pretty?" Parker had crawled behind the desk and started to unscrew the screws.
"Yes."
"Do you love her?"
"Yes."
"Is she a good lay?"
"Ye… Excuse me?" Ping. Parker dropped screw which clattered to the floor, but Sweets ignored it due to the question.
"You heard me."
"That is none of your concern. Why do you even care anyways? Aren't you like… 13."
Hollie scoffed. "I'm 16 in 3 months. And I don't really care. I'm just bored and there's nothing else to do around here.
"Hey, where's Parker?" Sweets asked, changing the subject.
"He went to the bathroom Mr. Sweets."
"Oh." 'Mr. Sweets.' At least someone had respect for him. However, it only made him forget that he hadn't seen Parker leave the room and he was facing the door.
All the screws undone, Parker crept around the desk and when Sweets looked at his watch to check the time, he scurried behind the couch.
The door opened and Saffi stepped in followed by Booth.
"Hollie, he wants to talk to you now."
"Mkay Spy."
Sweets stood and walked behind his desk to start getting some work done. Unlike Hollie, he judged Spy to be calmer and more respectful.
Booth was about to turn and lead Hollie to the interrogation room when Sweets sat in his chair, then let out a yelp as the bottom seat gave out under his weight and he tumbled to the floor, inches away from smacking his head on his own desk.
Parker popped up from behind the couch and started laughing along with Sirree as they gave each other a high-five.
Hollie glanced Spy. She glanced back. Then, both girls started cracking up along with the kids.
Booth laughed. Not because Sweets fell, but because of the puppy look on his face saying 'what just happened?'
"Ok, we'll I'm glad I didn't miss that, but I need to talk to Hollie now. Come on."
"Yeah yeah, I get it." She followed him out the door, closing it behind her.
Sirree stopped laughing and skipped over to where Sweets was. Bending, she rested her hands on her knees and looked at Sweets. "Are you ok."
"I think so."
"Well, if you aren't, I'm not paying to get you fixed." Sirre turned away and went to calm her sister and Parker down.
At the word 'fixed', Sweets' expression turned to one of horror, one that no one saw.
"Ninja, can we go for ice cream after?"
"Sure."
"Yes! I'm going to get chocolate." Parker through his fist up in triumph.
"I want Banana."
"Can I come?" Sweets asked pitifully.
"He's too old," complained Parker.
"I bet he'll steal my ice cream," added Sirree
Looking between him and the kids, Saffi bit back the urge to start laughing again.
"Only if he pays for his own."
Brennan sat in a small café across from a fiery redhead. A few tables down, Jenny's security detail had their own lunch while surveying the area for possible threats. The two women's chatter was lighthearted in cheerful with any and all evasion/avoidance of their work. Although they both had high security clearance, they were employed by different agencies and kept their discretion.
When lunch had been eaten and a cup of coffee placed in front of each woman, Brennan sighed and sagged into her chair. "Tempe, what's wrong? I know you didn't just call me to catch up."
"Did it hurt?"
Lowering her cup of coffee, Jenny placed it on the table. "Did what hurt?" There were numerous occasions she could be referring to.
"Leaving Jethro like that."
"He wasn't part of my five point plan," Jenny began. "I followed that plan my whole life and made it from probationary agent to the first female director of a federal agency in less than ten years." Her gaze drifted to her hand. More than once, she'd wondered what would have happened if she hadn't left.
"Falling in love isn't something you plan on Tempe, it just happens. Leaving him was the hardest thing I had to do. Now, 7 years later I'm his boss and he sees it fit to make my job as hard as possible."
"How'd you know you loved him?"
She smiled weakly; Brennan always had a knack for asking the hard questions. "When I see him, my heart beats faster. When he leans over me to look at a file, I feel a blush creeping across my face and can only hope he won't notice. I worry for him. Even if it's just a simple arrest, I know things can go wrong. Honestly, I don't know what I'd do without him. Love never goes away Tempe, I still love him."
"Then why don't you tell him?"
"I did many times before I left, but now I'd only hurt him." This only seemed to confuse the woman across from her even more. "I'm ill Tempe, terminally."
"Jen…"
"No," she interrupted. "I don't want your pity and I sure as hell don't want Jethro's."
"So, you'd rather suffer alone then spend your last days with the ones you love?"
"Life is complicated. What good would it do me to tell them, especially Jethro? I'd rip his heart out again when I die."
Brennan reached out and took Jenny's hand. "You don't have my pity Jen, you have my empathy."
A smile graced Jenny's face. "You still remember that after all these years?
She smiled back. "It wasn't that long ago and honestly, those words were the kindest thing anyone had said to me in a long time. People pitied the poor foster girl and never saw me for who I was, you did."
A comfortable silence lapsed over them as they sipped slowly at their coffee. A familiar expression crawled its way onto Brennan's face, breaking the silence effectively. "Just say it Tempe, I know you're thinking of something."
"Shouldn't it be their choice to make? I mean, I'm sitting here and you just told me you're dying and I'm glad I know Jen. I'd rather know and face it with you then be kept in the dark and wake up one morning and find you gone."
"Tempe…"
"Pleas Jen," she said desperately. "Tell Jethro, even if it's only to prepare him for the inevitable."
"Would you tell Booth?"
"What has Booth got to do with anything?" she snapped.
"Don't think I don't know how you feel about him Tempe. You may hide behind your little world of science, but in reality I think you'd have to be plain stupid not to see how the two of you look at each other."
"Yes…" The whisper was so low Jenny only just heard it. "I'd tell him." Her voice was stronger now. "If I didn't tell him, he'd never forgive me and he'd never forgive himself. He'd spend the rest of his life wondering if there was a single pain, a single agony he could have saved me from."
"He cares for you Tempe."
"I know…" her voice stated to tremble. "That why… that's why I could never die without telling him how much he means to me. I think I'd destroy him if I told him and left, if I told him and died. But if I didn't, no matter what happens after my life here, I'd spend it forever in regret. I'd die happy just knowing he would know." A tear tricked down her cheek. She laughed and brushed her fingers under her eyes. "Look at me, crying over something so trivial."
"Love isn't trivial Tempe. It never was and it never will be. It's the greatest happiness you can find. And if you start spouting of nonsense about love being a chemical reaction, I'll personally whoop your butt."
The two broke out laughing.
"Jen, please tell Jethro, even if it's only a letter."
"I don't know, wouldn't that make him suffer more?"
"No." Brennan took a deep breath. "I was, well a few years ago I was kidnapped along with my colleague Dr. Hodgins who had followed me to inform me of some new evidence on a case we were working on. We were buried alive."
"Dear God Tempe, why didn't you say anything?"
"I have nightmares still. Hodgins is bleeding, Booth is drowning. He was taken by the gravedigger over a year after I was, but we finally caught that bitch. But this is getting away from my point."
Her hands were clasped tightly in her lap. "When we were down there, creating air out of nothing in an attempt to survive long enough to be found, I decided to blow the windshield out. If we were 4ft or less from the surface, we could dig out way out. I was scared Jen, scared of never being found even if it was just my remains."
Drawing in deep breaths, Brennan forced herself to calm down before continuing once more. "We sat there, about to blow the windshield and Hodgins holds up a copy of my book and a pen. He says 'anyone you want to say goodbye to?' He wrote to Angela and I wrote to Booth. It was hard, knowing I might never see him again, but…" She struggled to continue. "Just knowing that somewhere, on this piece of paper, my feelings for him would survive… it was…" She searched for a word, but came up empty handed.
"Calming?" Jenny offered.
"Not in the least. My heart was pounding in my chest and time seemed to slow, even though that's scientifically impossible, as those two wires moved closer together. That book, that piece of paper gave me courage. If this didn't work, the perhaps one day he would know."
"I still wished you'd called me after that Tempe."
"You didn't call me after you were kidnapped."
"How'd you find out about that?"
"Jethro," they said together and shared a chuckle or two.
"That's my point Jen. You wish I told you. Don't you think Jethro would expect the same? You may be ill, but you aren't gone yet." In a vague attempt to take the seriousness out of the situation, Brennan took a long, slow sip of her coffee.
"What about you? What are you waiting for?"
Cradling the coffee cup in her arm, drawing a small sliver of strength from its warmth, she stared at a knot in the wood table, unwilling to meet Jenny's eyes. "Once you say those words, once you open your heart up, there's no going back."
Unknown to her, Jenny's eyes flashed in recognition. "He doesn't know." When the statement was neither denied nor confirmed, she went on. "You need to tell him, soon."
"Why does it matter?" Eyes teeming with fury stared into Jenny's. "It's in the past. The past has no meaning. It happened, nothing can change it."
"If you don't tell him, if will tear you apart."
"Tear what apart?" A bitter laugh left her throat. "We're falling apart at the seams. I don't want him with me because he pities me. Is that what you think I want? A relationship built on pity?"
"Look at me Temperance." The sharp tone of her voice compelled the other woman to do so. "You need to tell him. Look at Jethro and I. He never told me about his previous wife. Sure, I knew about his two divorces, but not about the wife he loved, the wife he cherished and lost along with his little girl."
"Knowing changes nothing." The stubborn teenager that had been suppressed forcefully throughout her foster care experience marched to the forefront of her brain and demanded to be heard.
"Yes, Temperance, it does. If I had known, I don't think I would have left him like that."
"But you still would have left him." Everyone leaves, it's a cold, cruel, fact of life.
"We have no way of knowing what could have happened. And we shouldn't spend our life wondering."
Brennan let out a sign. "Alright," she admitted with defeat/
"If it's Jethro's choice, shouldn't it be Booth's too?"
"I said alright already. I'll tell him. Now drop it, please."
"Come on Tempe, I'll drop you off. I know you took a cab to NCIS."
"Thanks." Smiling gratefully, she placed her portion of the bill on the table then turned to Jenny. "Can you drop me off at the Hoover building? Booth is probably with our case files."
"Sure."
"For the record, please state your name."
"Hollie."
"Full name," said Booth in an exasperated tone. Dealing with obstinate teenagers was not on his list of favorite things to do. Then again, almost all of those things involved Bones, Parker, or both of them. Bones was still gone, but he'd talked to her after questioning Spy.
"Hollie Richardson."
"You went to school with the victim?"
"Yes, I did."
"How well did you know her?"
Hollie shrugged. "I knew who she was. Didn't like her that much, but never had any problems with her."
"Really, because she was dating your ex-boyfriend wasn't she."
The question was met with a scowl. "Yeah, she was dating Nickie. That would be the reason I didn't like her, but like I said. I never had any problems with her."
"So, it didn't bother you that she was dating Nickie?"
"Would it bother you if someone was dating that scientist chick?" Crossing her arms and leaning back in the chair, Hollie eyed him contemptuously.
"Her name is Dr. Brennan and her personal life is none of my business." Ha, what a big fat lie that was. The thought of his Bones with someone else upset him to no end.
"Really. Well then, I guess Nickie's is none of my business. After all, I obviously have no feelings for him." Sarcasm was laced through her voice. Internally, Booth flinched. Were the emotions between them really that obvious? (-cough- yes -cough-)
"How did you feel about her dating him?"
"Ugh fine. It annoyed me ok. I was upset that he broke up with me. I was angry he started dating her like a month later. Given the chance, I probably would have trashed their relationship, but I didn't kill anyone."
"Do you have an address where we could find him?"
"Yeah, I do." Sulkily, she scratched a pen across a piece of paper and wrote two addresses out in messy, barely legible handwriting. "The first is his parent's house. The second is his brother's house. His brother is like never home so he hangs out there a lot since his parents don't see eye to eye with him."
"Thank you. I'll call if I need anything else."
"You will won't you sleazy copper," she muttered darkly.
"Excuse me?"
"Nothing, nothing."
"That's what I thought."
Yes, yes I did borrow parts of Booth's 'making love' speech in my little spiel at the beginning of this chapter. I'm not the first and I won't be the last to do so… and some of Kingdom Hearts. The rest is from Plato's Symposium. I have not read it in its entirety, but I plan to.
I do NOT read minds. I'll take the lack of reviews in the last chapter as a sign that I'm letting to much happen/my OCs are taking over. I shall work on that because I do realize I try and shove way too much into a story sometimes. I do hope you liked the scene with Jenny though. I think it's good for Brennan to have an older female friend who is in love with someone, but won't tell him.
Music:Numb Instrumental – Linkin Park (Seriously, go listen to this. It's mad diff from the original.)
... I never said the music I was listening to related in any way, shape, or form to the chapter….
Remember, reviews are like pop rocks. They taste nice when you get them, but then they pop and fizzle away leaving you wanting more.