After finishing his shift Jake stopped by his place to get changed. He took off his jacket and shirt and pulled on a black Harley Davidson T-shirt instead. Then he set out again, to get something to eat from Saul's. What used to be Saul's anyway. Saul had sold the restaurant at the end of June, packed his bags and left to live closer to his daughter somewhere in the Midwest. The place had been closed for refurbishment for a couple of weeks then the new owners had opened up again, this time as Alba Restaurant & Bar, definitely aiming for a bit more upmarket ambiance. Jake felt that the place had lost its character and the clientele had changed with it. He still went there because it was convenient for him, but the crowd he had gotten to know, like Wendy and her gang seemed to have moved on to somewhere else. He hadn't seen them since Saul's farewell party.
He had slept with Wendy a couple of times, but they had agreed upfront that it wasn't going to lead anywhere; that what they both wanted was the physical encounter, nothing else. As Jake had expected, Wendy had been curious about what sex would be like with a man whose legs were paralyzed and after a few encounters the novelty had worn off. They saw each other irregularly and never planned, except for that first time. If they happened to meet at Saul's, Wendy would sometimes come home with him, they would sleep with each other and she would leave again, before the night was over. The last time had been after the farewell party and he wasn't sorry about it. He'd be on his way back to the West Coast in two weeks' time anyway.
Jake ordered a burger for takeaway. While he waited for his food, he made his way to the back of the bar where the old pool table had been replaced with a new one and a new, large display was mounted on the wall behind it. As he had expected Wendy and her friends weren't there, but some other people he had met once before were busy downing shots of tequila. They noticed Jake and waved him over. It was five of them, three men and two women, and Jake couldn't remember their names. He rolled over to greet them and was promptly rewarded with a shot of tequila as well. In return put the shot glass on his forehead and balanced on the rear wheels of his chair. The group cheered him on. He grabbed the shot off his head and downed it, still balancing, than he sat forward and slammed the glass upside down on the table in front of him. The group clapped and invited him to join, but Jake took his leave and went over to the screen watching the soccer match for a few minutes. The last time he had kicked a ball around had been with Si, Alan, Jeff and some other Marines from his unit on the morning of the day he had received his marching orders for Venezuela. His lips compressed into a line for a moment then he turned away from the match. Most days the memory of his old self and abilities didn't bother him anymore, but today had been a lousy day at work. One of the detectives he had gotten to know over the last couple of months had been assaulted and raped in her home by at least two unknown assailants. They had left her for dead, but she had managed to attract attention and was now in hospital fighting for her life. It had caused a stir and consternation at the station. Jake wished that he could play a more active role in bringing in the perpetrators.
Through the crowd of people he noticed a man at the bar arguing with the woman sitting next to him. Jake watched for a moment as the argument grew more violent. The man grabbed the woman by the arm and slapped her hard in the face. She was trying to shrink away from him, but he held her in place, raising his hand again. The other people at the bar pretended not to notice.
Jake rolled forward until he was next to the bullying man. He turned his chair sideways and reached down, grabbing the leg of the bar stool and yanked it forward. The man came crashing down and Jake launched himself on top of him. He pinned the stunned man's right arm to the floor with his left and started punching him in the face. People backed away. The woman was crying.
"You fucking asshole. I'll show you what it's like to be slapped around like that." Jake spat the words into the man's face while he carried on punching. The man had gotten his free arm between his face and Jake, trying to ward off the blows. The bouncer, a recent addition to the bar, came running. He grabbed Jake around the chest from behind, pinning Jake's arms.
"What the fuck? Get off me. Let me go." Jake shouted at the bouncer, but to no avail. He hauled Jake backwards, away from the man and however much Jake struggled to free himself he couldn't get an angle on the bouncer with his arms pinned to his sides. The bouncer dragged him toward the rear fire door and simply pushed against the emergency release bar and backward through the door, hurtling Jake into the alley behind. Jake landed on his back and the impact shot a piercing jolt of pain up his spine.
"Fuck." He shouted. The door opened again and his wheelchair came crashing down on him. Jake just managed to deflect it and it bounced across the alley landing somewhere behind him. Jake struggled to push himself up on his elbow and shouted, "I hope you realize you've just lost a customer." He fell back with his arms extended. "Candy ass bitch." He stared up at the city above. A train suspended from a monorail track roared through the alley above him and it started to rain, drenching Jake's clothes; the pain in his back too intense to move. "If it ain't rainin' we ain't trainin'." Jake shouted up at the sky, imitating one of his drill instructors' jaunty tone. As he lay there, waiting for the pain to subside, he noticed two men approaching him. They were nondescript in the way of plainclothes officers or agents, but wearing matching suits and trench coats.
"Are you Jake Sully?" One of the suits asked. He was carrying a small handheld device.
"Step off. You're ruining my good mood."
"It's about your brother."
"What about my brother and who are you?" Jake still didn't move.
"Your brother is dead."
"Fuck!" Was Jake's only reaction. Then, after a moment he sighed and started looking around for his wheelchair. It was lying within reach above his head. He stretched for it and pulled it closer. The second agent stepped around Jake to help him, but Jake stopped him. "Don't. I got this." He righted the wheelchair then pulled himself into it, wincing. When he was sitting properly again, he said, "were is he?"
"Princeton ME. We'll take you there."
"You haven't explained yet who you two suits are."
"We are with RDA. Colleagues of your late brother so to speak." One of the men showed Jake a company ID. His name was Ronald Porter.
"I want to talk to the ME office first before I go anywhere with you."
"Sure. Suspicious by nature?"
"No, by profession." Jake pulled his phone from a pocket of his cargo pants, opened the directory service and connected to the medical examiner's office in Princeton. He spoke quietly on the phone for a while, then closed the link and looked up at the two men. "Let's go."
"Hi JJ." Jake had just arrived back from his trip to Princeton and it was late, but not too late to call JJ.
"Hey Jake, what's up to be calling this late?"
"I've got some bad news and some not so bad news."
JJ was sitting in his recliner in the den. "Hang on Jake, Si and Alan are here as well. We're watching the soccer world cup. Can they come on?" Si came into view, then Alan.
"Sure. Hi Si, hi Al."
"Hi Jake." They said in a chorus.
"So what's the bad news?" JJ inquired.
"The bad news is that Tom's dead. He was shot during a hold-up."
"I'm really sorry Jake." A pained look appeared on JJ's face and Si rubbed a hand over his. JJ continued. "How are you handling it?"
Jake shrugged his shoulders. "I seem to have become somewhat immune to deaths in the family, but don't worry, I'm not dissociative."
"And now? Are you coming back to San Diego?"
"No. That's the not so bad news." Jake said matter-of-factly. "RDA has offered me his gig. I have decided to accept their offer. I'm going to Pandora instead."
"Wow. Now that's unexpected."
"Yeah, I know. The whole thing was unexpected for me, too. This all happened today. I'm sorry, guys. I was looking forward to seeing you again, but I won't have time. I have to sort out my stuff here and then I have to be in New Mexico by Sunday at the latest. On Monday we are being shuttled into orbit to the ISV Venture Star. Then I get put into cryo and on Tuesday we are breaking orbit for Alpha Centauri."
"Let me know if there's anything you need me to do." JJ offered.
"I will if I run out of time."
"Well, Jake your dream has come true after all."
"Yes, I know, but I'll think about the philosophical implications later. Now is not the right time."
"Will you be doing Tom's full tour?" Si asked.
"Yes. Seventeen and a half years, eleven and a half of which I'll be asleep. So technically when I get back I'll only be thirty six whereas JJ will be retired." Jake grinned sheepishly.
"Are you happy?"
The grin disappeared. "Hmm—difficult question. I'm happy about the opportunity, but I'm not happy that Tom had to die for it—though we never really got over our personal differences."
"So what will you be doing on Pandora?" Alan inquired.
"To be honest, I have no idea. I haven't got the faintest clue what Tom was supposed to be doing there. The only thing I know is that I am taking over Tom's avatar. I don't know what that means exactly, but from what they tell me it's like experiencing the environment through another body as if you are actually there. So here are the two good reasons why I really want to do this—first, my avatar can walk and second, I'll earn a lot. Maybe not enough to pay for the whole four years of treatment once I'm back, but modest improvement is better than none."
"That does sound like a good gig to me." JJ agreed. "But let's talk again before you ship out. Maybe I can meet you in Las Cruzes on Sunday."
"Let me find out more about the logistics first. I'll call you when I know if that'll work."
"Sure. Let's chat soon."
"Yeah, bye guys." Jake closed the feed. He sighed. His back still hurt like a bitch. He pulled the medical kit bag out from under the cot where he had kept it lately, moved across and leaned against the wall. He pulled out an injector and stabbed it into his upper arm. Then he turned off the sound of the TV and just sat there in silence with his eyes closed, waiting for the medication to push back against the pain. Through his closed eyelids he observed the changing light intensity of the TV screen. He rubbed his hands over his face then he pressed the palms of his hands against his eyes to shut out the light completely. His entire family was dead—wiped out; his parents, his wife and child and now his brother. He examined himself for feelings of grief and guilt, but there weren't any. Instead he felt an odd sense of exhilaration, like being given a new lease on life. It seemed only right to leave this unforgiving planet behind, for a while at least, to travel more than four light years out into space and explore a new world.
A realization struck him. A realization that all of a sudden put the question he had struggled with for so long into perspective; the question: 'Why me?'
To go to Pandora had been his biggest childhood wish. Partly the reason why he had joined the Marine Corps, since he knew that RDA recruited retired soldiers as security staff. It had been an option he had considered, but that possible future had been crushed with his spine. Since that fateful day he had believed that he would never get to see this alien world of amazing beauty and danger with his own eyes.
But now he understood. If he had never broken his back, if he had never become paralyzed, he wouldn't have gone. He would have married Emily when they both weren't ready, when neither of them would have understood what they were getting themselves into. They would have had children and the responsibility would have tied him down. The value system that the Marine Corps had drilled into him would have made him stay put, to take responsibility for his family, to live an ordinary life.
All of a sudden it was so clear, like the first rays of light on a crisp winter morning throwing the landscape into stark, but beautiful relief: Everything is as it should be.
He realized that for everything that had happened, for all the immense pain and hardship he had been through, there was a reason. When he opened himself up to that thought and let his intuition guide him, he felt a sense of wonder, of wholeness and of lightness; it was like the feeling he felt when he was flying. He didn't know what his destiny was going to be, but one thing he suddenly knew with unshakable certainty—his destiny was waiting for him on Pandora.