He said.
I froze, unable to whisper a word. For all of these years continuation of Shepard's duty, honouring her memory was my dream, the shining task I tried to fulfill - and same politicians closed their eyes on her. What's changed now?
Sudden realization twisted corner of my lips - I understood why Anderson was so nervous - because recent slip of sensitive data referred to unnamed project of Alliance reached clone. Now one way or another this woman blackmailed him, and Anderson traded Council's help - and definitely wasn't pleased with bargain, considering his haunted look. But what was my purpose in all of this? Either clone found information proving Reapers' existence - no, doesn't match - in this case all the Councilors except Anderson would feel uncomfortable, - or "Minerva" tried to make Councilor dance while she plays music. And only way Council needed in me is stopping that woman.
In this case, now fabulous event which tomorrow... err, later this day will be in all news reports is going to happen - candidate for second human SpeCTRe refuses straight before Council. Maybe I don't believe to that woman's speeches, maybe I think she doesn't deserve to use the name of person I still love, maybe she's totally controlled by Cerberus, but I was on Horizon, I saw it was she who saved colony while attack obviously was planned either by Cerberus or by Alliance, but most likely by both. I saw readings that it was she who travelled across galaxy protecting colonies while all you, politicians, could do is pin me down on Citadel while "occasion on Horizon is investigated". If somebody in a galaxy can stop Reapers, it's she - person who we know as the clone.
Another thought crossed my mind - if I'll deny, I'll leave her alone fighting the most powerful enemy our civilization ever faced. Not at all behavior expected from man, marine, always supporting sentinel. If I'll deny and keep sitting on Citadel, I'll become same coward as politicians locked "Normandy" down two and a half years ago. If I'll deny and run away to help the clone, I'll be forced to dance while the Illusive man is playing. But if I'll agree and just follow her step behind, I'll be able to sit on two chairs - protect clone if it will be necessary while not following her, or more accurate, Cerberus' orders. So, are you ready to transform into stalker, Kaidan?
"It will be a honour for me," - visible sign of relief crossed Anderson's face. It's good I don't set old friend up - he's the only person I can trust. No matter if I like his decisions or not, they're always served to noble goals - success of the mission, safety of people. It's a tough time for him, considering rumors that human Councilor is just a pawn of other Councilors. I can swear on Bible he is not - but nowadays preparations for Reapers invasion took major part of his time and will, and Anderson simply hasn't time to contacts with press.
"Commander Alenko, step forward" - asari Councilor replied.
"It is the decision of the Council that you be granted all powers and privileges of the Special Tactics and Reconnaissance branch of the Citadel. SpeCTRes are an ideal, a symbol. The embodiment of courage, determination and self-reliance. They are the right hand of the Council, instruments of our will".
"SpeCTRes bear the great burden. They are protectors of galactic peace, both our first and last line of defense. The safety of the galaxy is theirs to uphold".
"You're the second human SpeCTRe, the proof that your species can not only bear single heroes in dark years, but has enough responsibility to protect the peace every time and everywhere".
"I'm honoured, Councilor" - I nodded. When I heard this first time I was thrilled - Shepard, vulnerable and fragile woman standing before me, took all weight of galactic problems on her shoulders. Now it was a farce - only purpose of naming me "ideal and symbol" is stopping the only person who can protect galaxy.
"Now you task is investigate motives and actions of Alyson Shepard, first human SpeCTRe. Councilor Anderson will give you further details. This Council meeting is adjourned".
"Congratulations, Commander," - Anderson crossed Council chamber, waving me to follow him to his quarters. "I strived for this during more than two years".
"You fought for my becoming a SpeCTRe? But why?" - guards seemed to be busy discussing latest meeting, but it was only apparent - this guys were handpicked by Anderson and proved their usefulness against several turian extremists. And one volus, - "I has already been obeying your orders, why not choose someone more charismatic as SpeCTRe candidate?"
"Because you don't know all odds, commander," - Anderson checked anti-espionage system.
"Let me guess - clone has gone rogue, and my task is to stop her? Just like Saren and Shepard?" - I snorted, - "And what has she done - killed another SpeCTRe and bombed colony?"
Anderson kept silence, looking at me with a great suspect.
"What, she really did it? Fabulous," - what is Cerberus thinking about? Set agent up that much for nothing? Or it was planned for getting another human SpeCTRe and was discussed with Anderson? I felt sick.
"Not a colony," - Anderson turned one his omni-tool, searching for something, - "A trade centre. Do you know Tela Vasir?"
"Asari, I assume?" - I remembered all possibilities. Representative of that race currently in clone's team was called Samara, - "What's wrong with her?"
"Council sent her to investigate Cerberus. She found some clues on Illium, then reported that she has something important about Project Minerva and then there was a distress call. Liara T'Soni tracked her down, contacted clone and they exploded building where Vasir contacted with agent. Possibly it was agent of Shadow broker and Vasir bought data about "Minerva" there. After this, T'Soni, clone and human biotic called Jack chased asari on a car and caused several serious traffic incidents. And then they landed on asari hotel, killed more people, killed Vasir and took her data. It's still unclear where they gone after - T'Soni disappeared, leaving her office. Normandy SR2 is out of range of surveillance buoys".
That's weird. What could asari SpeCTRe find that Cerberus decided to risk reputation of one of the most loved across the galaxy agents? - "Don't think I don't trust you, Councilor..."
"I understand, commander, this action are unbelievable. But here is surveillance cameras readings from Illium. Take a look when you'll get spare time. But now your primary concern is a crew. I'll check which frigate I can get today, but now you should care about yourself first. Go to have some sleep, Alenko," - Anderson opened his terminal with dismissive look, but I wasn't going to give up so easy. "What do you mean - today? Is it any reason to leave Citadel immediately?"
"Yes, Council give me location of places mentioned in last report of Vasir. It's look like Cerberus' bases. If that data is so important..." - his terminal glittered red three times. Councilor's face stiffened, he opened galactic map - in its corner was a little emblem of frigate, - "It's Normandy SR2. She's close to buoy, so I can open comm channel. Would you like to talk to clone?"
"Of course I would," - I replied, looking at the small symbol approaching to Perseus Veil.
She said.
I slowly rose, grabbed my makeup and went back to the bathroom. Mascara - it's better not to cry when it will result in your face covered with black stains, it always was some kind of key which held emotions locked - and long white eyelashes as well. Lipstick - my armour, my sign, my way to not lost personality. Father told once I was saved when freezing on deserted island because of my bright red wind-cheater - and now, every time I want lay my hands and surrender I wear it, and my red flag leads me to battle again. I checked myself one more time - now I was ready to any battle, even if...
"Commander, Councilor Anderson wishes to talk with you," - speaking of devil. Joker sounded pretty strange now, if it weren't Joker I would decide person is confused, - "Day gets better and better, huh?"
"Patch him through, Joker," - I replied, activating terminal once more.
Instantly I understood why Joker's voice was not usual - this monster probably prepared to record my reaction. He'll never had such chance. "Councilor. Commander. What can I do for you?" - I tried my best to mimic Miranda's icy tone.
Both Anderson and Alenko watched my artificial limb for a while. I couldn't feel any of them, and then my former CO started: "Looking bad, Shepard. How do you holding up?"
I rolled my eyes. Why everyone going to pour ton of shit asks about health first? Anderson definitely aware what I wholeheartedly hate this kind of stealing my time. "What's ETA to Perseus Gate, EDI?"
"Fifteen minutes. Qwib Qwib will be there at twenty minutes," - blue orb replied, causing another set of startled looks.
"Closer to business, Councilor," - another mimic of Miranda, shifting weight to one leg, setting hand on thigh, arching eyebrow. Why are they call me?
Anderson shook his head wearily: "Council has questions, Shepard. Why do you activated Omega 4 relay? Why are you heading to Perseus Veil? What have you done on Pragia?" - Alenko definitely heard about Pragia at first time but decided to keep silence, - "What are you planning to do with data about "Long Road" project? Why did you chased and killed SpeCTRe and why Cerberus bombed building?"
"Ahh. This isn't call "Thank you, Shepard, for saving our collective asses while all we have done is calling you a traitor". Or "how do you feeling after showing finger to Illusive Man and now lacking any support?" - I looked at Alenko, catching my breath, cold look back expressed nothing, - "Or maybe I deserve any appreciation for protecting colonies which on some reason were equipped with shield not recommended to such level of radiation? Or targeted by batarians, geth, whoever else? Keep dreaming, Shepard."
Not any changing in face - with similar success I may persuade stone wall.
"So if you want answers - you're welcome. On Pragia I helped my friend to deal with her past - brutal experiments held by Cerberus. It ended in massive explosion, because if anyone would use data from there in future experiments on biotics, I'll kill that person with own hands. Bare hands. Activation of Omega-4 relay was a desperate step after Freedom's Progress, after Horizon, after abduction of my own crew. You know, I'm stupid weak woman who can't just sit and wait while same bastards, which already killed me once, wiping out colonies. So I risked my life and lives of every single person I can trust to stop Collectors. Thanks for Horizon, by the way - it dramatically limited number of people I can trust my own life - you've known what's going to happen, right, Anderson?" - the last outburst clearly targeted Kaidan, but he stayed perfectly still. Not shocked, nod frozen - just still and a bit bored. Is that the person I loved? Who swore if something will happen to me - no, he never ended this sentence. Oh, how naive I was - I thought that love, that willingness to sacrifice myself to save him, that readiness to follow beloved one to hell was mutual. And what about now, after I died and he did nothing to fight Reapers, protect the ideals we - maybe I fooled myself in this "we" - followed? Was he ever close to me or he just wanted to be close to Alliance poster girl, first human SpeCTRe and another bunch of meaningless words? How many times I asked myself about it, recalling Horizon, recalling that message where he just thrown all responsibility on my shoulders, in fact, stated that he doesn't want to have something in common with forgotten by everyone, forced to work with enemy woman but maybe will consider this option if I'll become fucking icon again?
Anderson spoke, forced by my long silence: "And what would you suggest? Continue to wait until next colony would disappear?" - commander's brows furrowed for a moment, then relaxed again. How? It's your life we are talking about. It's you who would be processed... - although you still don't know about this. Let's correct the situation: "No, Councilor, I'd suggest to warn me, at first. You know, when I came to you begging to take me away from terrorists. And warn commander," - no reaction at all! Maybe he thinks I'm talking about another commander? - "colonists and fleet. Build a shelter and calibrate turrets properly. Because the cost of this operation was thousands of colonists processed in grey liquid. Maybe it will spectacularly beat out all politics from your head, watching how the last colonist, Cerberus agent Lilith Sunnyside, was melted into goo?"
Anderson froze during my definitely more emotional towards to end speech, then close eyes, lowered shoulders: "Can we be sure that this attacks won't repeat anymore?"
I finally found spot that make them believe me. "Yes, you can. Collectors' base was destroyed - this was primary objective to pass Omega..."
"And what about those attacks which were caused by Cerberus?" - Alenko interrupted.
Here we go again. I can't blame him - after all, Cerberus deserves to be considered as empire of evil. The problem was that question wasn't about Cerberus - it was about me. Really, how dare I was to work with organisation which kidnapped colonies and claim that I fight for stopping attacks? How many times should I play as a broken record to explain what our primary goal is to unite forces to stop Reapers to everyone who preferred to hide behind great politics balance, not starting war, evil Cerberus?
"Cerberus didn't attack colonies - it's hard..."
"Really, Shepard? Or maybe you don't want to hear this? Or your friends-terrorists..."
"They're not..."
"Accepting ship and funding doesn't mean you're friend of someone? Hamster in cage thinks the same" - I finally decided to listen until the end of sentence and it didn't any good.
"Hamster, huh?" - great, poor hamster stopping Reapers' fleet. Finally, for why I'm persuading this two pigheads? Need in another act of masochism and calling a traitor, Alyson? It's obvious neither Council nor Alliance is going to help until Harbinger will land right onto Citadel tower, and after they'll clearly do everything to save own fat bureaucratic asses, so now you can do more useful matters - say, prepare to meet quarians, - "And you're Alliance's favourite pony - delicious oats and blinders included!" - his face still not changed, but if gaze could set on fire, I'd be an ash for now.
"Shepard, it's not the time for arguments. Rest of the Council are pissed off because you killed SpeCTRe..." - Anderson decided to interrupt magnificent view of two flaring biotics.
"What?" - older man never had a chance to end phrase, - "Do you paying attention? I'm trying to tell you what I finally have data about Reapers, and all you can do is blaming me into death of Shadow Broker's agent? That's enough! I'll send you all information I have - don't expect me to do something else. Shepard's out."
I closed terminal so fiercely that he blinked ad now displayed only exclamation mark. Brilliant - brand new system which reliability was sworn by Tali. In fact, most of tech starts at least glitching at my presence. Back on the old Normandy...
"To hell the old Normandy!" - I shouted out loud.
Really, to hell old Normandy. It was you who warned Kasumi about sinking her life into Grey Box, and now it's you who cling to the memories of love probably never existed.
He said.
Have time to sleep, huh? You know, becoming a SpeCTRe isn't that I occasionally do to relax. Two hours checking possible candidates I still haven't found any experienced soldier I can get access to during the day. It's looked like Citadel wasn't popular place to spend shore leave with special forces. Two candidates I picked weren't brilliant idea as well - neither of them have real combat experience, but getting into fair combat wasn't my intention.
Now it was 0600 and I might try to call them. Girl or boy first? Let's start with boy - he isn't that type of person which wakes up early, so it may take more time to him to understand what's going on.
Request for a video feed was accepted immediately, and I saw thin figure of Steven O'Bryan. When he sat, people haven't got idea how tall he was - nearly 6,5 feet high. To such tall and such not muscular person Steven was surprisingly powerful, what helped a lot when high technologies actually meant "take that equipment and bring X storey higher, what repeatedly happened when we developed decrypting algorithms for Cerberus data. Surprisingly to representative of techs, O'Bryan was always perfectly shaved but doesn't deny from "tech sweater for work" - in his case it was dark grey. My own was supposed to be greenish-brown, and Garrus has (yes, turians are not exception. I suppose that even Tali has a special envi-suit of indefinite colour) blue exemplar with stripes of steel colour. Now Steven was pulled out from RTFMing, his long wavy blonde hair binded in ponytail and big grey eyes extremely sleepy.
"Don't tell me you coded all night long, Steven," - I started, looking at five... no, six cups on his table. There were also several data pads, some details of unclear origin - I suggest Steven made them himself, and a piece of pizza.
"No, Kaidan, I didn't coded. I debugged. It's all Magnus Ulrichsson and his kind manner to write everything on assembler. Oldschool, what can I say. Anyway, what do you need?"
"Want to get job where you would be independent from Alliance and do things the way you will choose?" - I teased fellow.
"Yes, of course. But it sounds like a spam. Wait, is that you who suggests me this job? Does it involve a lot of shooting?" - Steven pressed his long fingers against each other, - "What exactly it's about?"
I decided to put cards on table: "You see, Steven, I'm a SpeCTRe now. Do you remember that data about Cerberus' projects we decrypted? It's a next step. We need to investigate bases, and I won't cope with security without you".
Steven whistled, then massaged the temples, then drummed fingers on the table. "Sounds interesting. But first. Who pays, Council?".
Reasonable question - I remembered about Shepard was forced to scan planets for minerals only at 0400 and contacted Anderson, which ensured that operation will be funded personally by him and we formally unlimited in credits - we'll get everything that can be justified in reports. I was proud about Councilor trusts me that much. "Council? No, Council never funds SpeCTRes. However, Anderson ensures that any personal request will be satisfied".
"Sounds good. Than second question - how dangerous is it?" - O'Bryan looked more satisfied, semi-smile played on his lips.
"How dangerous should be mission which includes unlimited funding and practically no reports? It's Cerberus' bases, Steven".
"Cerberus' bases - and permanent risk to be killed by Shepard... err, what's her correct naming now? Clone? Minerva?" - now O'Bryan smiled broadly. I became sure he'll accept this job. "Exactly. About name - in our discussions you can call her as you like with one condition - everyone should understand who are you talking about. When speaking to her, it's better to use "Shepard" - we already have too many problems, let's not add destruction of status quo there. So, are you in game?"
"I am," - replied Steven, stretching his arms.
"Okay then, see you at 0800 at humans' embassy. Alenko's out," I shot and turned channel off before O'Bryan had a chance to complain.
Next task will be complicated one. Therum shown that it can't be too many biotics in team - and my main task as a sentinel will be maintaining of tech armour most of the time - so I needed in another strong biotic. The problem was that top five human biotics included tattooed woman in clone's team, also known as Jack, or Subject Zero (evaluated biotic power 590), Carla Neno, which was seriously unstable (biotic power 563), Zilabamuzale Nsimbi, who peacefully lives in Uganda and not going to leave Africa in nearby future (BP 481), me and Miranda Kennedy, who is missing (BP 454 and 452 correspondingly). At least one of the list was on Citadel - Carla Neno, schizophrenic biotic, one of the first L2s. Carla's biotic system slowly degenerates and poisons her brain, so woman is forced to take meds constantly - if not, she starts to have false memories about her husband and son, killed by secret organisation which tried to abduct her for some creepy experiments. If her brain is damaged by products of self-decaying more time, she starts to think that any person nearby is an agent of named organisation whose task is kidnapping her. In the hardest case, she hears voices of her imaginary family which beg for revenge on said agent. Biotic Wing group tries to help her, but every time they stop giving her neuroleptic to check activity of brain stabilizing meds, risk of reappearing symptoms increases dramatically. How I found out all of these? Because latest outburst happened in presence of Shepard, who tried to persuade Neno take meds peacefully - and which caused the most of scars on Alyson's body. After that, Shepard was afraid to approach to any biotic, even was in fear of own abilities, so she was transferred to far colony to find peace with herself. It almost succeed, with one exception - after that shore leave Shepard got her Star of Terra.
So my hesitation about including Carla in team was rather justified - but I'm not an expert in implants, so it's always better to consult with Jamila bint Zayd. I opened terminal and find an address of Biotic Wing.
"Yes?" - rather untidy girl replied immediately. Then she recognised me, and her broad face became even wider - "Commander Alenko! You probably want to talk with Ms. Jamila bint Zayd? I'm sorry, she's sleeping at the moment. Should I ask her to call you back after she'll wake up?" - her moonlike face shined with expression "I'm talking with celebrity!". I haven't decided yet if it's scary or funny. "No, please, wake her up now, Ms.?..."
What, this smile can become even wider? Impossible! "Mineralica. Oh no, just Ksen. Anyway, it will took time to wake her up, so I'll tell her to call you back. Commander."
"I'll wait for her call. Thank you, Ksen," - I replied, smiling to blush on her face and lost channel.
Message to intendant, composed right after arriving to my apartment, was sent. Set of light armour for O'Bryan, asari commando outfit for Carla and two omni-tools "Savant" class - I knew Steve doesn't use standard issued "Bluewire", but his tool, rather expensive and rare, wasn't military adapted. Now I called back to Anderson.
Councilor wasn't alone, salarian in uniform stood near him. "SpeCTRe, this is commander Lerlon, your XO," - really, why I expected frigate be human one? My only hope is that I'll be able to pronounce name of the ship, - "Commander Lerlon, it's SpeCTRe Kaidan Alenko"
"Nice to see you, SpeCTRe" - answered salarian. He was surprisingly orangish-yellow and seemed to be shorter than normal salarian. Huge eyes were closed on half and speech was too slow and smoky- commander obviously was very tired. "Ship, Qwea Marolla, awaits in the docks. We suggest departure at 0900".
"Confirmed. I'll be ready with two people in my team - engineer Steven O'Bryan and adept Carla Neno".
Councilor massaged his eyebrows: "Are you sure you can cope with Neno's... abilities, SpeCTRe?"
"Neno is not more dangerous than any powerful biotic, sir," - both Jamila and Alyson trust her, why shouldn't I? - "Also I'll discuss her preparations with Jamila bint Zayd".
"Very well, commander. Dismissed until 0800", - he turned channel off.
At the same moment incoming call from Biotic Wing appeared. I accepted and enjoyed the view of Jamila.
Daughter of two most famous neurophysiologists from Earth, Zayd abd Al-Khaliq bin Muhammad al-Misri and Hadija bint Khaldun, Jamila was first independent human researcher whose field was biotics. Tiny woman with mysterious brown eyes, she was always fully immersed in her study and always very sad and quiet. As Alyson explained me one day, it was because her motherland suffered a lot during twenty first century. Jamila rare spoke to public, this was a function of Ingrid Magnusdottir, better known as Alyson Shepard - in fact, it was the only function of Shepard in Biotic Wing, expressive speeches - she hasn't got neither proper education nor time to lead any researches.
"Jamila, I have a sensitive question to you," - I started, surrendered under sad gaze. Scientist kept silence, - "Does Carla's mental state allow her to participate in real combat?"
Jamila tilted her head, adjusted her hijab and sank into thoughts. I decided to show her entire picture, or this consideration may took a long time: "It's necessary for mission directed by Council. And this is about Alyson".
Woman instantly decided on action: "Will Alyson be harmed?".
"No. My task is not to let this happen".
"Good. Carla still feels uneasy about that event when she seriously broke Alyson. And I feel uneasy about Shepard's resurrection. Maybe this mission will clear odds for all of us," - she opened extra panel in terminal, - "When and where should she be?"
"0800, humans' embassy. Thank you, Jamila".
"Take care about Carla, Kaidan. And about Alyson, too".