I don't own TW, and i don't think anyone owns H1N1.
Please note that if you don't know what H1N1 (aka Swine Flu) is, then this chapter won't make much sense. Now, on with the report...
Observations of an Overprotective Lover by the darkness revealed
Report written by: Dr. Owen Harper
Observed: November, 2009
Specimens: Captain Jack Harkness and Mr. Ianto Jones
Report commences:
The Captain can be extremely stubborn and frustrating sometimes. Actually, I take that back-he's frustrating and stubborn all the time. But this time, he was at his worst.
You know the whole craze about swine flu? It's crazy - everyone's getting vaccines and panicking, and sales of Purell Hand Sanitizer have gone WAY up.
Well, a certain Captain is panicking along with the rest of the world. And the main object of his paranoid focus is his (poor) lover, the Teaboy.
It all started when the Captain came to work lugging a HUGE box of Purell bottles. And he insisted that everyone wash their hands before and after every meal. And when he said that, he started looking at me. I could practically feel the "Hint hint wink wink" vibes coming off him. Fortunately, by the end of the meeting, his attention had turned somewhere else.
It just started with him making sure the Teaboy had a coat and plenty of Purell. But by the next day, he had bought him cold medicine, cough syrup and a big box of tissues. Then he started driving him EVERYWHERE, even if it was just to the post office, which is a block away. By the end of the next week, he was making sure the Teaboy had no other human contact (as in touching) other than him.
You can imagine the Teaboy's annoyance. He started giving everyone decaf, which made everyone beg Jack to stop being so overprotective. He didn't listen, bloody git he is. In fact, the next day, he brought in a big, plastic suit for the Teaboy to wear.
It was the final straw. The Teaboy completely broke the suit up, and then burned - yes, burned! - the tissue boxes. He then threw out all the syrups, medicines and hand sanitizers Jack had got him. Then he sat Jack down and gave him the most severe lecture I have ever heard.
Fortunately, by the next day, Jack stopped all signs of overprotectiveness, and Ianto went back to work, confident that Jack would stop smothering him. But he doesn't know that Jack has a secret emergency H1N1 medical kit in his office...
End of Report
THis was written in the library...i luv the library. :) I just thought that since everyone is going on about H1N1, Jack would be too.
What do you think? Please review!