Wow. Lots of reviews, much love. I thank you all!
Next chapter time! Quicker than my usual updates.
"Here we stand,somewhere in between this moment and the end. Will we bend?Or will we open up and take this whole thing in?" Mockingbird, Rob Thomas
Abby's breathing was hitched. McGee felt like the walls were closing in. Gibbs stoic self turned confused and concerned. Ducky felt a lump in his throat beginning to form.
Tim looked to Gibbs, but found no answer. He found nothing actually; a whole lot of nothing.
They didn't know how to react, what to say. They just sat at the table in heavy silence, staring at the table. Their minds were in a whole other world.
Tony comfortingly tightened his arm around Ziva as she continued to sob into his shirt. His throat felt dry and just the sight of her crying brought tears to his eyes.
"This is my fault." she said to herself in-between sobs. The images of her family breaking down at her words filled her mind, the words she said, the words that came out of her mind, the words that she thought of before she spoke them.
"No." he put his lips against her hairline. "None of this is your fault." he assured her.
"All of this is my fault." she spat, her words stung.
He shook his head, rubbing his hand up and down her back. "No, no its not." he held her shoulders, causing them to be face to face. His face fell at the glistening blotches of tears underneath her eyes. Brushing his fingers lightly over her cheeks, he continued to speak. "How could this be?"
She was silent. She let him wipe the tears away as she looked absently to the floor. His question was answered by the pure silence that lingered between them when no answer came to her.
She sniffled as his hands fell back to his side. But after another moment, she felt his hand securely over hers. "I just want my last days to be normal." she admitted after another moment.
He looked deeply into her chocolate browns, his throat felt tight and dry. He hated seeing the agony in her eyes. "We're gunna get through this." he assured her.
Time paused for a split second for her.
We.
Did he just say we?
As in two people? As in not one person.
As his words sunk into her cranium, he continued. "And then you're going to have the…normalist," he let out the smallest chuckle. "…last days ever." he finished. His vision was now impaired by the tears filling them and the lump on his throat had finally become unbearably large. He tried to swallow, but couldn't.
She smiled through her tears and let a chuckle slip when she caught sight of his forced smile. Smiling, right now, was their outlet. It prevented them from crying. So they smiled. They shouldn't. This was definitely not a time for smiling, but for both of them it was better than crying.
"So nothing like Last Holiday crazy, right?" he chuckled through his sadness. She chuckled with him, shaking her head and furrowing her eyebrows. "What?" she managed to get out through her sniffles. "Movie." he smiled.
She covered her mouth to prevent the tears of joy and laughs of sadness from escaping.
"Thank you." she managed to get out.
He wrapped his fingers around her hand as they continued to witness each other's tears. He knew what she was thanking him for; she was thanking him for being Tony.
A few minutes past before Gibbs moved at all.
In one quick movement he pushed the chair away from the table and got up, bound for the bedroom.
"Gibbs." Abby whispered, but it fell upon deaf ears.
He got to the door just as Tony was closing it. When he turned around he was startled slightly by his boss' presence, but calm down immediately. All traces of tears had been cleaned away and he was looking as collective as one could be when you just found out your best friend was dying.
Gibbs gave him a questioning look. They never did have to talk to know what the other was thinking. After years of working with Gibbs, their minds had become, almost, perfectly in sync.
"Damn doctors didn't find it in time." he growled, his jaw tensing.
"Time?" he asked sadly but sternly. "Less than four months…" Gibbs rubbed a hand angrily across his mouth. "But boss," he said quickly, grabbing the silver fox's eyes. "She's not gunna do it." he said in disbelief, although Gibbs didn't know what he was talking about. "She's not even gunna let the inevitable win."
He furrowed his eyebrows, searching the senior field agent's eyes for an answer. "She's gunna get herself killed in the field." It hurt him to say those words, especially when talking about Ziva.
Gibbs immediately knew why. He didn't need to ask to know how hard this would be for all of them if she had to die of lung cancer. It would be slow and painful, for all of them.
"It's the coward's way to go." Tony mused to himself, looking at the floor. The tears he held back stung his eyes.
"No." Gibbs shook his head sternly. "It's the selfless way." he said hoarsely.
Gibbs is right. This way is easier for everyone. The voice agreed.
Tony looked at him tightly, his anger building up inside with every second that passed. He knew Gibbs was right. He knew that voice was right. But he didn't want them to be right. He wanted Ziva to live as long as she could; he wanted Ziva to live period.
He let the anger out in the form of his palm slamming against the wall.
Oh, that one hurt.
Gibbs didn't flinch. He stayed calm as Tony paced the hallway angrily, rushing his hands through his hair and breathing heavily.
"She doesn't deserve this." he huffed.
"No one does." Gibbs agreed stoically, almost being cut off by Tony's immediate shout.
"Ziva, doesn't deserve this!" he yelled angrily, stopping in front of Gibbs. His breath raged as he stared down his boss, but stopped when his sense finally came back to him.
Tony. That damn voice, she was everywhere. Shouting isn't going to do anything.
Gibbs watched Tony calm down, his hand tightly over his mouth to prevent any further outbursts. "Get some sleep." he commanded.
Tony let out a sarcastically amused sound. "Yea." he chuckled sarcastically. "Easier said than done boss." he breathed, running a hand though his hair.
"Then stay." Gibbs said simply. His words caught Tony's eyes. He watched him for a second before nodding.
Ziva sat on the bed, trying so desperately to hold in her coughing. She heard their hoarse whispers. She almost flinched when he hit the wall. And the pain and hurt in their words sent daggers through her heart.
She began to sob, now, more than ever. She heard them leave. They all had left. She was almost relieved; she didn't think she could manage to see their broken faces again.
Getting up, she tiredly headed for the door, but before her hand reached the knob, it slowly turned. Tony emerged from the hallway, a drained look on his face.
"I sent them home." he stated, not taking his eyes off her.
She nodded, turning back around. Her eyes caught herself in the mirror. Her hair was still tightly pulled back. The bags underneath her eyes were still visible and her face was soaked with tears.
"I can stay if you want." he offered hopefully. She turned around to meet his sincere eyes. "If you wish." she answered.
As she headed towards the bureau she quickly remembered something. "The guest bed is not ready." she said a bit frazzled. She headed towards the closet to grab a few sheets, but was surprised to feel a soft hand on her shoulder.
"We can pull a Paris." he said charmingly when she turned around to meet his smile.
She let a smile tug at her lips, relieved that he was acting his own Dinozzo self. "Nothing happened in Paris." she whispered shyly, avoiding his stare.
"We still playing that card?" he questioned slyly.
She opened her mouth slowly in shock. She had the sudden urge to smack his grin right off his face; but instead, retreated to closing her mouth tightly. She narrowed her eyes on him mischievously, silently agreeing.
She knew he was joking.
He knew he was joking.
But the pure tease lightened the mood.
They both mentally agreed that they were too tired to change and both slipped under the covers, staring at the ceiling momentarily before facing each other, unlike in Paris.
They found themselves closer to each other than they thought they were, dangerously close. Their eyes finding solace in each other's.
She had before taken her hair out of it bun and now a few stray curls covered her olive skinned face. He hesitantly moved his arm along the covers until he reached her face. Her warmth breath against his hand was comforting as he tucked the curls behind her ears.
Their faces were drained of any emotion except curiosity as they still stared at each other, seemingly fascinated with one another. They memorized each other's faces as if they had just met for the first time.
Ziva put her hand delicately over his neck, bringing him closer to her until their foreheads rested against each other. He let her cheek rest on his hand and they stayed like that for a moment, perfectly still and peaceful.
And then, it happened.
Neither remembered who instigated it, who was the first one to move a millimeter closer. But in reality, they both moved in, at the same exact time. Like true, star-crossed lovers.
His nose met hers he contemplated staying there for the rest of the night, but her stare was irresistible, he fell in.
She kissed his top lip, feeling a tingling sensation as his bottom lip brushed the bottom of her own lips. Her hand pushed him in closer, but not much. It was a sweet kiss. She did not need it to go any further.
But temptation and pleasure filled her being and she wrapped her lips in his again, longing for their soft touch against hers. She had now unlocked the secret as to how Tony could get so many girls in so little nights. He made her feel loved.
He may have acted like a pig on the outside, but on the inside he was soft and gentle, ever so sweet. His scent was intoxicating, he was a true charmer.
She craved for his touch, his warm breath mixing with hers.
He let go after those four long seconds.
Staring into her eyes, he hadn't realized until now that somewhere during their kiss, their hands had become intertwined above the covers. His other hand was still nestled under her cheek and her hand continued to rest on his neck.
They continued their uneasy stares more moments than they could count. The other's stares kept them awake.
Then, perfectly in sync, Ziva's body turned as Tony's hand moved to support her neck. She melted her body against his. Her lavender scented curls brushed up against his face softly as she nestled the back of her head in the crook of his neck.
Their still intertwined hands were holding her stomach in place. And her steady breathing was the most comforting thing in the world right now.
He pulled the covers closer to them and let one, single tear fall as he noticed how perfect his fingers felt in between hers, how perfect her head fit in his neck.
That's when he realized it.
He was falling for Ziva David.
And he was falling fast.
Unbeated, fix everything in the a.m.
Chapters are gunna get a hell of a lot sweeter from here.
Okay, not gunna lie, I'd really like as many reviews as possible, so please. I'm really writing up to my potential on this story. I'd appreciate a review.
Here's my review challenge, tell me your favorite line, or when you started crying and/or tearing. Or tell me if you're not crying. Whatever works! Or just leave a plain o' review!