Okay, loves, so computer is still being raped by the geeks at Best Buy. And these plot bunnies just keep invading my brain garden.

"Maybe if my heart stops beating it won't hurt this much…Because I'll never let this go. But I can't find the words to tell you. I don't want to be alone…One day you'll get sick of saying that everything's alright. And by then I'm sure I'll be pretending. Just like I am tonight." -Never Let This Go, Paramore

Tony lay motionlessly in bed, almost afraid to move, to wake the sleeping assassin on top of him.

Their legs had become entangled with each others just moments before Ziva drifted off to sleep. Her head was still nestled safely in his neck and most of her upper body was on his.

He wanted to fall asleep, he was tired. Ziva was definitely a work out, no doubt in that. But it was worth it, she was worth it. He just couldn't close his eyes. If he was home, he'd probably wander off to the living room and pop in a movie or go through his TiVo list. But he wanted to watch her wake up.

That split second when she would just wake up, right before she could process where she was or who she was with, was heaven for Tony. The hint of a smile her lips subconsciously gave off and the way her eyes lightly fluttered open would be the cherry on top of the cake of this perfect night.

His eyes drifted over to the digital clock at her bedside table which read 3:02. He thanked whatever cruel higher being that they had the day off.

He tightened his grip slightly on her warm, bare body. Gently caressing her cheek, he felt tears starting to form in his eyes. He was falling in love with a dying woman. It was a relationship that would never last. Like a one night stand that meant so much more.

He let a tear fall, she would never know, she would never see it.

Now that he had her, he never wanted to let her go.

4:27 A.M

She took a deep breath, stirring a little. Tony tensed slightly, ready for anything. He watched her chest rise and fall, every breath she took was a sigh of relief on his part. She was alive for another moment. He was with her for another moment.

It was almost silent when she felt herself waking up. But she felt the steady beating of something. A heart. His heart. The heart she was giving her last amount of love to.

Tony's heart.

She propped her head up, meeting his eyes.

"Hello." she said sweetly.

"Hey." he responded hoarsely, covering up the dry feeling in his throat. Her smile made him so happy, he wanted to cry.

She placed a chaste kiss to his lips. And let her eyes smile for her.

She let her head fall back onto his chest and intertwined her fingers with his. "Perfect." she whispered to herself, it felt natural to her.

"Tired?" he asked, the slightest chuckle in his voice.

"A bite."

"Bit." he corrected.

She suppressed a smile, but with her head buried in her chest, he could see it. But he knew it was there. "You did that on purpose." he realized.

"Perhaps."

She turned her head around and lifted herself up to meet his eyes once again. A smile touched her lips but, unfortunately for him, didn't escalate to a full on smile like he had hoped. "Can you smile…for me?" he asked, pleaded.

Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

"Please?" She gave him a smile, along with a slight blush of embarrassment. It was the world to him. He could have the strength now, to pretend that everything was okay, at least for today.

Tomorrow would be another day, he would need another smile, another breath, another flash of life from her. But that was tomorrow. And today was today.

And that smile, that one beautiful, majestic smile, was his strength for the day.

He brought his thumb up to her mouth, brushing it lightly against her soft lips. He slid his finger along her lip until he reached the corner of her lip, and down to caress her chin. "You are so beautiful." he said absently, as he admired her.

Her eyes flickered downwards. She gently grabbed his wrist, taking his hand off of her face momentarily before bringing it back to her lips, kissing his knuckles softly.

He smiled into her eyes and brought her face to his until their noses touched. And when they did, he pulled her just the slightest closer until he could feel the smile against his own lips.

He could pretend to be happy right now.

He could pretend that everything was perfect. And that everything would be alright.

But he couldn't pretend that he loved her. And he wasn't, this was real.

The love was real.

The happiness, a little forced.

5:12 A.M

Her lips were still wrapped in his. But now, she was laying on her back, with most of Tony on top of her. They had been kissing for almost an hour now, not escalating to anything. Just enjoying each other.

She pushed slightly and pressed him down onto the bed, having herself on top now. He rubbed his hands up and down her side, memorizing every curve to her body. And her hands ran through his hair.

Love filled the room and for her, everything was right.

Then, they stopped. A silent, mutual agreement.

Ziva looked into his eyes, her eyes dancing with happiness. But she saw something else in Tony's.

Sadness.

"What is wrong?" she asked, concern hitting every word.

"Nothing." he lied.

She kissed his chin. "Everything is going to be fine."

He let out a sarcastic chuckle, weak and cheerless. "No, no its not, Ziva. Stop." he paused, taking a breath. "Its not alright."

She search his eyes for the slightest glint of happiness, but came up empty handed.

His face dropped, regretting what he had just said. He wanted to tell her how much he wanted her, and how scarred he was to love her. Heartbreak and misery filled his mind every time he shared a moment with Ziva. This would all be gone, taken-no snatched- from him and be gone forever.

Stop lingering on the future Tony. She's here now, enjoy now.

Her eyes were still on his, still searching.

"It won't be." her face dropped. "But for now," her eyes glimmered with hope. "Everything is perfect."

His old girlfriends would smile and continue their make out session. But Ziva knew better, she was not obvious to his pain.

She lay her head on his chest and let out a deep breath.

"Talk." she commanded simply. "You talk, I will listen."

"Fine." he twirled a loose curl with his finger. "But then you talk, and I listen."

She nodded against his chest in agreement, rubbing and ankle up his leg flirtatiously. "I want to know everything."

"Ditto."

I really, really, really, hope I can update this soon. Next chapters gunna be deep.

Review! Favorite line and such.

Think we can make it to 125? That's not asking too much is it?

If we can, that's be amazing, if not, you win some, you lose some I guess.