"Peter?" Edmund repeated. He stared up at me from the pillow with tired eyes.

My mind was blank. What could I say to make this seem appropriate? Obviously, Edmund would question why I had chosen this ungodly hour of the night to visit him in his sickbed, instead of coming to see him at a decent hour, like everybody else, but I hadn't thought about that. I just didn't know what to say.

Luckily, Edmund saved me from making a complete twat of myself, as usual.

"Why haven't you come to visit me before?" He said quietly. I could see the hurt in his eyes, feel it in the harmonics of his voice. He sounded lonely.

"I have." I said, taking myself by surprise. I frowned then, at the disobedience of my own voice. "I mean, I have come to see you, but you were never awake."

Edmund sat up now, a frown creasing his pearly white forehead. He shifted away from me onto the opposite side of the narrow bed. The covers wrapped around his legs, tangling them. I hadn't noticed how gangly he had become.

"Then why didn't you wake me?" He muttered, staring me out like a cat.

When I didn't say anything he pounced, delivering his blow like a master.

"I've been waiting here, Aslan knows how long, for you and Susan and Lucy to come and see me! Do you know how boring it's been? I hate it! I can't do anything, I can't exert myself, which means not even being able to read a book, or anything like that! It's like a prison in here!" Edmund exploded.

I gaped at him. Edmund rarely let go of his emotions like that. Then an idiot's grin spread like treacle across my face. I started to laugh. Edmund ogled at me, incredulity written all over his face. He blinked slowly at me.

"Why are you laughing?" he demanded.

This question just made me laugh even more. I began to guffaw raucously, holding my sides. Edmund pouted at me, crossed his arms, and frowned. He looked so comical sitting on his bed in his pyjamas that I just couldn't stop.

Whenever I managed to quell my laughter, the sight of Edmund looking at me with a straight deadpanned face just made me cackle insanely even more.

"It's just that – you sound so annoyed – it's hilarious!" I managed to gasp out between breathless pants of merriment.

"Well, you may find this very funny, but I for one don't. Oh it's alright, go ahead and laugh, but I shan't sit here at your expense to be made a mockery of!" With that heavily italicised paragraph, he twirled around on the bed and sat with his back to me.

A few moments later, when I had decided to finally stop laughing, I climbed onto the narrow bed beside him and perched there in silence. He still looked enraged.

"I'm sorry, Ed." I apologised with a smile suppressed upon my face.

He avoided the apology, and instead caught me with a complete bombshell of a question. It hypothetically knocked me off my feet. I was stunned. Literally.

"Why did you kiss me, Peter?" Edmund blurted out. His voice was curious, questioning. He looked at me from underneath his fringe and his long, think eyelashes. Edmund's peat black eyes bored into my pale blue ones.

I was astounded. What with lack of sleep, worry, and uncomfortable arguments, I had completely forgotten about my irresponsible actions earlier in the week. What could I say to him?

My heart rate speeded up. I could hear the blood pounding in my ears. Everything went blurry apart from Edmund's beautiful face.

Wait – what? Beautiful? Where did that come from? Edmund was my brother, and I should definitely not be thinking about him like this!

But a little treacherous voice in my head added more adjectives to him:

Edmund isn't just beautiful, is he? He is gorgeous, dazzling, stunning…the list could go on. You know it could.

This inner monologue did nothing for my cracked nerves or the dire predicament I was facing. It made me think thoughts that one should not think about one's own brother.

"It's just that I was thinking about it, while I was stuck here, I mean, and it never really made sense. I was dying, wasn't I? Kind of. So it may've been desperate, mightn't it? I don't know, but that was the most likely theory I could think of. And I thought about it a lot, what with being stuck here while I recovered, because I had nothing else to do. And another thing –"

He could've carried on babbling like a manic for the next twenty minutes, but unfortunately (for him) I jumped away from him, my eyes wide.

I was cornered. Every ancient instinct screamed deep within me to get away, to run from this burning humiliation. Perspiration trickled like a small stream down my back. I rolled my neck on my shoulders, trying to soothe a non-existent ache, while my hand fidgeted around with my hair. I was so nervous, so self – conscious of my previous actions.

"Um…" I muttered, my eyes darting around the small makeshift room. Chair, bed, Edmund, floor, chair, bed, Edmund, floor…

"Look…I'll see you in the morning, yeah?" With that murmured statement, I left the ward. I sprinted back to my room, my feet finding the way in the dark halls. I didn't know I was heading for disaster.

So. There we have it.

Sorry it's been so long, and that was really short, but life catches up with you sometimes.

I don't blame you if you never read my stuff again. That was really crap. My favourite line, however, was this:

It made me think thoughts that one should not think about one's own brother.

Hee hee.

Anyhoo, bye bye my darlings!

~PearlsOfWisdom