Revelations and Expectations

by Kariesue

Will things go awry when secrets are revealed? And will Sheppard pay the price?

9. Chapter 9

xoxoxoxoxo xoxoxoxoxo xoxoxoxoxo

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"Gertie, you are off your game today. I am so gonna trounce you in the next few moves," John announced to his chess partner as he sat in the rec room waiting for his daily ride. Dave had said he would be in to get him today instead of the driver who'd come the other three days this week. He'd said he had a few packages to pick up in the afternoon and he'd be there right after.

John didn't care as long as he got home to Josie's good cooking and the comfortable lounge chair in the den. He'd been in the house for almost two weeks and was already feeling more at ease there. He just hoped Dave wasn't late today, he was almost done this chess game.

"Don't get too uppity, young man; I've taken you to the cleaners three times this week."

And she had, John thought sheepishly but also hoping his mind could be that clear when he was eighty. He looked at the board, checking again all the possible moves from both players.

"You said your brother was coming to get you, right," Gertie asked. "Well I think he's here and he's got company with him."

"Probably Julia, his fiancée," John guessed as he positioned his hand to move his chess piece.

Gertie's comment, "He's got more than that," got his attention. He repositioned his piece, said, "Check," and looked up to see who else Dave had brought along. At first he thought he was hallucinating, there was no way. Then his mouth dropped open and his breath caught in his chest.

Gertrude watched John's reaction as he looked at the newcomers. His eyes grew intense, his jaw dropped down and he inhaled a deep breath. But when it came out it was so shaky she wondered if he was going to hyperventilate.

Then the little boy wriggled free from the young woman's arms and tore off across the floor to cover the few yards to the wheelchair bound man. The emotion that crossed John's face was both pain and pleasure and reminded her of when her husband had first seen her when he'd gotten back from the war.

The little boy squealed as John scooped him up into his arms. "T.J." John breathed out barely above a whisper, but Gertie didn't need good hearing to understand what was playing out in front of her.

T.J.'s arms immediately wrapped around John's neck. John's hands encircled the young child in much the same way, only with one hand on the back of T.J.'s head. Both of them had their eyes closed tight and seemed to be holding on for dear life.

After what seemed a lifetime, John's arms loosened slightly but only enough to move his face near Torren's and whisper, "Hey, Pal. Oh God, I missed you!"

Torren put his hands on John's cheeks and pouted, "I miss you!" Torren briefly pressed his tiny lips to John's fuller ones then wrapped his arms firmly around his neck again.

John looked up and saw Teyla, who had taken a few steps forward and now stood just a foot in front of him. A huge smile split her face but her eyes were filled with moisture and he watched as one lone tear rolled down her perfectly golden cheek.

Their eyes met and John wondered if she could indeed see inside his soul. He questioned if he should shutter the emotions he was feeling then decided he didn't want to. He wanted her to see. He wasn't sure what she would do with it but he wanted her to see.

Teyla took her fill of the man sitting in front of her. He looked wonderful and so much more alive than he had the last time she had seen him. She was pleased with his reaction to seeing Torren again. Her son had been desolate without John and could only be appeased by watching recordings of him several times each day. She had kept good her promise to not let Torren forget him.

Now John was looking at her and his eyes conveyed such open adoration she became a bit flustered. She thought of trying to sense his feelings but if his eyes were any indication, the intensity of his emotions at this moment, added to her own, might be completely overwhelming.

A large smile appeared on his face and he said, "You look very … American."

Teyla looked down at the blue jeans and casual cotton top she wore and replied, "Jennifer assisted me in packing." She walked the few remaining steps to John, and Torren chose that moment to pop his head off John's shoulder.

His eyes lit up and he cried, "Mama, loot!"

He bounced a bit in John's arms and Teyla responded, "Yes, I see!"

With his left arm still around Torren, John reached out for Teyla. She knelt in front of him, her hands going to his shoulders, her forehead touching his. John's hand slid into Teyla's hair, gently cupping the back of her head. He took a breath deeply inhaling the familiar scent of her.

The breath came out shaky and he sighed, "Hi, Teyla."

Another tear slid down her cheek and she breathed, "Hi, John." John wanted to stay like this forever but Torren had other plans.

"Mama," he whined, and Teyla and John moved enough to look at him. "All bettah, he tum home now?" He turned and put his face right up next to John's and pleaded, "You tum home now?"

His little mouth turned into a pout but John was having a hard time seeing it. Something was clouding his vision so he blinked a few times to see if he could clear it up. It worked a little bit but he noticed Teyla must have gotten some of the same dust in her eyes.

Torren's eyes joined his lips to make the pout even more potent as he slowly demanded, "You .. tum .. home!"

John pulled him in closer, his right hand continuing to clench in Teyla's hair. "I will, Pal, soon. I promise." His voice cracked with emotion.

He looked between Torren and Teyla and spotted Dave and Julia only a few yards away. "But for right now, we're going home with Uncle Dave, okay? All of us."

John's eyes moved up again and saw that Dave and Julia had moved so they were right in front of him. John shook his head in bewilderment. "How in the world…?"

Dave grinned, "I asked Colonel Carter for a favor."

"Thank you," John said his voice thick with emotion and Teyla added, "From both of us."

Torren clapped his hands and John amended, "Make that all three of us."

John now realized how quiet it had gotten in the rec room. He looked around and saw the place was still full; they were just the center of attention. He chuckled and raised his voice, "I should've sold tickets."

Teyla stood up and grasped the hand that had been in her hair and held it tight. Dave flipped his head toward the door and asked, "Ready to go?"

John nodded then said, "Wait!" and he rolled slightly back drawing Teyla with him. "This is Gertie. She's one heck of a chess player."

Teyla bowed her head in the older woman's direction. Gertrude looked at John and he thought her eyes looked slightly damp, too. "They're lovely, Colonel. Now you go enjoy them!"

John reached over to the board, adjusted a piece and said, "Checkmate!"

"Are you quite finished?" Teyla chuckled as she took hold of the wheelchair handles and began pushing John across the floor behind Dave and Julia, Torren enjoying the free ride in his lap.

As they approached the door John put his hand on the wheel to stop. Teyla recognized the two women who were standing there and paused before them.

John started the introductions, "Teyla, this is …" but Teyla interceded, "Lisa and … Helen."

At their stunned looks, Teyla explained, "You were both in the recording that John sent to us."

Enlightenment hit them and they both said it was nice to meet her.

Teyla closed her eyes and bowed her head, "It is indeed an honor. We owe you a debt of gratitude for all that you have provided for John. The days have been difficult but we rest easier knowing he is being cared for with such diligence and concern." Teyla bowed her head slightly again.

Helen smiled, "It's been easy. He's such a cooperative patient."

"John?" Teyla pursed her lips. "Who is this patient they speak of? I have observed you in the infirmary and I do not believe cooperative would be an accurate description."

Her eyebrows rose but when he looked up at her with the innocent eyes and charming smile everything inside her melted. She closed her eyes and shook her head then leaned in closer to Lisa and Helen.

"It if often difficult to remain stern with him when he does that."

"I can imagine," Lisa replied and looked down when John called her name.

"I …uh , I …might not be here tomorrow. So if I don't see you ladies, have a Happy Easter."

"You, too," they both said and at Teyla's confused look, John said, "I'll explain later."

John started wheeling toward the door and Teyla said, "Again, I wish to express my appreciation. Torren has been quite distressed without John and I, too, have been filled with a sadness in his absence. We are grateful for your assistance."

Teyla gave one last bow of her head and followed John out the door.

Lisa and Helen watched as she left the room then turned and looked at each other.

"Wow!" Lisa exclaimed.

Helen nodded and responded, "And she carries a machine gun!"

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xoxoxoxoxo xoxoxoxox xoxoxoxox

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"This meatloaf looks incredible, Josie. Are you sure you don't want to join us?" John asked as he settled into his seat at the large kitchen table.

"I'm positive. You just enjoy your visitors." Josie answered then whispered, "I like them."

Teyla looked up from putting Torren into the borrowed booster seat and commented, "Thank you for all your help and for the meal that smells so delicious. I still do not understand how you knew meatloaf to be Torren's favorite."

"Don't look at me," John protested. "I didn't even know you were coming. But you must have known, Josie. I can't believe you didn't tell me."

"Don't blame her," Dave insisted. "I wanted it to be a surprise. But I also didn't tell you because if something happened at the last minute, I didn't want you to be disappointed."

John nodded in understanding but was still flabbergasted that Dave had arranged for all this.

Josie left and the meatloaf was passed around, along with the mashed potatoes, gravy and green beans. Torren was in heaven and John knew by the end of the meal he would be in need of a bath.

"Ronon and Rodney wished to come as well," Teyla told John, "but they were invited to a celebration feast for Geldar and Holona. They are celebrating three years since the cessation of hostilities between their people."

John smirked and said, "That's great! And a minor miracle. Do they still have all the pictures of Rodney lying around?"

"I am unsure. But they were disappointed that you could not attend. However, they agreed to accept Ronon in your stead."

"What did you tell them?"

"We simply said you were unavailable. However, I think it will interest you to know that the celebration feast is also in honor of the upcoming nuptials of Nola and Baden."

John's fork stopped halfway to this mouth and he remarked, "Really?" He shook his head and said, "I didn't see that one coming, Wow!"

"I agree they are an unusual couple," Teyla contributed.

"I've seen stranger," John said. "Heck, look at McKay and Keller. I still don't get that."

"They have much more in common than you would imagine."

John made a face. "They'd have to." He took a few more bites then asked, "So tell me about this Armstrong. What's he like?"

Teyla took a deep breath and sighed. John chuckled, "That bad, huh?"

Torren raised his plate and smiled, "More, pease!"

John put more food on his plate and laughed, "We're gonna have to hose you down, Pal."

Torren dug back into the food on his plate and John looked over at Teyla for more information.

"Colonel Armstrong is very like Colonel Sumner and Colonel Everett in his military approach and philosophy."

"So he looks right through you as if you weren't there?" John said.

Teyla's smile lit up her face at the realization that John remembered her exact words from six years ago when they had first met. "Yes, although I think he sees me more as Mr. Woolsey's assistant and therefore has no need of me."

"He'll learn," John muttered, "I hope."

Dave interrupted, "Teyla, you mentioned Colonel Sumner and Colonel Everett. Who are they?"

Teyla looked at John who sighed, "Sumner was the Military Commander for the original expedition to Atlantis."

At Dave's confused look, John chuckled, "No, there was no way I would have even gotten a ticket to go if it weren't for the ATA gene. And even then Dr. Weir, the expedition leader, was the one who insisted. Sumner made it clear he didn't want me; something about my record and attitude and inability to follow orders."

Julia joined the conversation. "So why isn't Colonel Sumner still there?"

John and Teyla glanced at each other again but Teyla answered while John concentrated on his food. "Colonel Sumner was killed shortly after arriving. His death was caused by the Wraith, a formidable enemy in our galaxy."

John gave her a knowing look and almost rolled his eyes. Teyla responded sternly, "John, you need to release yourself from the guilt you carry over Colonel Sumner's death. You need to accept that the Wraith were responsible for ending his life, not you."

"Right," John replied with a trace of doubt still in his voice then he addressed his brother, "So now you know how I got my command – through default. I was the next ranking officer."

"But they must have thought you could do the job or they would have sent someone else to replace Sumner," Dave protested.

"If by they, you mean the US Military," John supplied," They had no clue what was going on. When we left for what we hoped was Atlantis, we all knew it was probably a one way trip. We had no way of knowing if we could ever get back to Earth. And we couldn't, for a while." John took a sip from his water.

"We had no contact with Earth for almost a year. But with a Wraith armada bearing down on us, we managed to cobble together enough power to open a wormhole back to Earth for about two seconds. Not long enough to send anyone through but enough to send a data burst containing as much info as we could on Atlantis and our situation. That's when Everett came into the picture."

John gave a brief explanation of the Marines coming through, the fight and the eventual arrival of the Daedelus. Teyla noted that he never mentioned his suicide run to blow up the hive ships. But unlike Rodney, John did not like to boast of his accomplishments.

"And this Everett?" Dave prompted.

"He was shipped back to Earth with the seriously wounded," John replied.

"So what did he want when he came to visit?" Dave asked.

Teyla's eyebrow rose considerably. "Colonel Everett came to visit you here?"

John nodded. "The first week I was in rehab." He shrugged. "He said to show moral support. I have some doubts about that personally."

Teyla tilted her head. "He still does not hold you to blame for what happened to Colonel Sumner?"

John shook his head. "No, but that doesn't mean he likes me any better now than he did then. I think he just liked the idea of having my complete attention when there was no way I could talk back."

Dave looked thoughtful and commented, "I think Dad would have liked that, too."

John just chuckled and Teyla boasted, "And that is when you were promoted to Lt. Colonel and allowed to remain in command."

"Yeah," John agreed. "But I'm pretty sure Elizabeth had a lot to do with that."

"That is possible," Teyla conceded, "but only because she trusted you and knew you were the best suited for the job."

That uncomfortable feeling John always got when people complimented him rose to the surface so he looked around for a distraction. Torren, aware the adults were deep in conversation, had decided to draw pictures in his gravy.

"Whoa there, Pal!" John said as he removed Torren's plate from in front of him. "You are a mess!"

John laughed and T.J. looked up at him and stuck his fist in his mouth to try and lick off some of the gravy dripping there.

Julia was ready with a few paper towels but John announced those were just a band-aid. This kid would need a full blown scrub down.

John got in his chair and grabbed a few things from his room and Teyla's, put a semi-wiped down Torren in his lap and wheeled toward the bathroom.

The others cleaned up the table and moved to the den. The adapted rooms were right off the den so Dave, Julia and Teyla could hear the shower running and Torren's squeals of laughter. Teyla decided to use this opportunity to gather some information.

"David, I am curious about something. In the recording John recently sent us, his hands were extensively bandaged. Also one of the nurses, Helen, made a puzzling statement. She informed John that if he had another bad day, she would come in and hold his hand. Colonel Carter was also quite insistent that Torren and I visit soon. Did something happen?"

Dave took a deep breath and listened for sounds from the bathroom. When he heard a deep chuckle followed by a peel of childish laughter, he proceeded, "A few weeks ago, on T.J.'s birthday, John was pretty upset he was missing it. This coupled with the frustration of inactivity got him pretty worked up. But then he got an-e-mail from someone on Atlantis telling him they'd sent this Armstrong to take John's place and it sent him over the edge. He started questioning if he would ever fully recover and walk again."

Dave sighed and looked disgusted with himself. "He called me to talk and I wasn't in. I guess a few more little things happened, spilling his lunch, bumping his head trying to get a clean shirt and he just … snapped."

"Snapped?" Teyla questioned.

"Got violent, went nuts. He started trashing the room, broke things, pulled the phone out of the wall. Whenever anyone came in to try and help him, he swore and threw something at them."

Teyla's face was a mixture of horror and sadness. "How did he injure his hands? From throwing things?"

It was Dave's turn for his face to show horror and sadness. "He broke a vase and there was glass lying on the floor. While dragging himself over to the window, he picked some up. When I finally got there, he'd been squeezing the shards of glass for so long that his hands and fingers were all cut up and his hands were just dripping with blood."

"But what of the bandages on his wrist and arm?" Teyla persisted.

"He somehow cut it with the glass."

Teyla's eyes widened even further. "He did this on purpose?"

"He says he remembers it happening but he doesn't remember doing it." Dave took a deep breath. "He was pretty messed up by the time I got there."

Dave didn't go into details as he was still ashamed of his part in John's breakdown and felt he could have helped to avoid it.

They heard the water in the bathroom turn off and Dave rushed, "I wouldn't say anything to John about this. He's completely horrified that it happened."

"I agree," Teyla said. "It is unlike John to lose control of his emotions. He would be very upset that he had. I will not speak of it."

It was about ten minutes later when John came out of the bathroom with Torren in his lap, both sporting wet hair and shiny faces. Torren was in his pajamas but John had changed into a pair of navy blue pajama pants and a gray t-shirt, also. They were both barefoot.

They rolled over and joined Teyla on one side of the large sectional couch opposite the big screen TV. Dave and Julia shared the other half.

"I see you both had a shower," Teyla observed.

"It's got a hand held spray and T.J. was a little nervous so I just showed him how it was done."

"Excellent!" exclaimed Teyla. "Now you both smell wonderful."

John got a teasing glint in his eyes and sounded offended, "Are you saying we were stinky before? T.J., I think your Mom's saying we were stinky."

"Tinky!" Torren laughed.

"Are we gonna let her get away with that?" John directed at the boy in his lap. "Maybe she needs a shower, too."

Torren giggled and said, "Yeah!"

John leaned toward Teyla slowly and Teyla's nervous, "John, what …?" was never finished because John started shaking his head sending water flying everywhere.

Teyla squealed this time and started laughing as she attempted to push John's head away from her. When they were done with the tussle, Teyla was leaning against the arm of the couch and John's hair was sticking up in every possible direction.

Dave and Julia's laughter joined Teyla's as she informed John, "Your hair has grown quite long."

John ran his hands through it and said, "I hadn't had it cut in almost a month when I got injured so it's been almost three months now."

"I can bring you to get it cut anytime you like," offered Dave.

"Maybe while Teyla and I are shopping tomorrow," Julia suggested.

"Wait!" John cried and looked at Teyla. "You just got here and you're leaving me to go shopping?"

"We just need to find her a dress for Easter," Julia defended. "Besides, I don't think you have much to wear for church, either."

John hadn't really thought about going to an Easter mass but wondered if Teyla would want to.

Before he could ask, Teyla said, "David and Julia drove me past the …church. I am looking forward to seeing the inside of such a marvelous structure."

"Fine!" John sulked, "I can get a haircut and suit while you quickly find a dress." He looked down at Torren who was still moving his head slightly to see if he could shake the water off like John had. John pulled the long curls off of Torren's forehead that were hanging in his eyes and asked, "What about this? Can we cut it or do you want to let him turn into Halling?"

Teyla considered for a moment then replied, "If Torren will consent to it, you may have his hair cut."

With details ironed out, John told Torren it was time to think about bed. The boy insisted on a story so they started on the favorite: The Three Bears. When it came time for Teyla's part she decided to go with "Who's been eating my meatloaf."

Torren threw up his hands and fell over laughing, right off John's lap and onto the couch. Torren stopped giggling long enough to reprimand Teyla and got back to the story. Dave and Julia just watched, smiling, feeling like they were in the middle of one big private joke.

When the stories were done, John said it was time to say good night.

"Da night, Papa Bear," Torren giggled.

"Good night, Baby Bear," John chuckled back and pulled him in for what looked like a kiss but turned into a loud raspberry on the boy's neck, eliciting another round of giggles from him.

John was about to move to his chair when Dave reminded him, "Didn't you tell me Josh wanted you to practice standing when you transferred over?"

"Oh, yeah," John grumbled then explained to Teyla, "They started me standing in PT this week. I can only manage a few seconds at a time and I can't do it by myself yet."

Dave got up to help but Teyla insisted, "I can assist him, just tell me what to do."

John showed Teyla where to stand and how to position her hands to help him the most. John lifted himself off the couch with his hands on Teyla's shoulders. He immediately felt the strain on the underused leg muscles and his face reflected that.

Then he saw Teyla's grin and heard her breathless awe. "You are standing, John!" He forgot about the leg strain and just focused on her beautiful face. When his eyes went wide and he could feel his legs giving out, Teyla eased him into the wheelchair and Dave applauded, "That was about ten seconds, Nice!"

Torren climbed right into his lap and they moved to the hall between the two bedrooms. "You and your Mom are going to stay in there," John pointed to the room on the right then indicated the other one, "And this is my room."

Torren peaked into both rooms then kneeled up and put his face right up next to John's. "I seep with you," he whispered timidly then added, "Pease!"

John's eyes flew up to Teyla who gave a gentle warning, "Torren…"

Torren's bottom lip jutted out and quickly began to tremble as his eyes filled up with tears. "Pease, Mama!" he begged.

John thought his eyes would follow suit if he had to watch this child's heart break another second. He gave a small nod and mouthed, 'If it's okay with you.'

Teyla looked torn for a moment then said firmly but softly, "For tonight, Torren."

John expected Torren to respond with his happy clapping or squeal of glee; however the boy simply wrapped his arms around John's neck and buried his head into his shoulder. As John reached down to move the chair, he felt T.J.'s arms squeeze tighter, the band around his heart responding in the same way.

At the side of the bed, it took almost a minute to coerce the boy from around John's neck to the bed with the turned down covers. Teyla brought in Torren's blanket and stuffed animal and managed to get him in the bed with the promise that John would lie down with him.

After a kiss on Torren's forehead and a matching one for John, that her son had insisted on, Teyla moved to the doorway. She heard John tell Torren about the stuffed animal he'd taken from the pillow and was holding in his hands.

"You know how you have your giraffe, well when I was little, I used to take this bunny everywhere with me." Teyla closed her eyes briefly and sensed such an immense feeling of warmth, safety and contentment that she knew she was picking up the emotions of both of the occupants of the bed.

She backed out of the room and rejoined Dave and Julia in the den. As she sat down, she heard John sing a song. Dave and Julia laughed and Dave shook his head as he commented, "He's teaching him 'Little Bunny Foo Foo'."

Julia looked curious, "Shouldn't he be getting him quiet instead of all riled up?"

Dave raised his eyebrows and reminded, "You forgot, I told you John has a little bit of magic that he performs."

Julia just looked skeptical and Teyla looked at Julia and said, "I am not sure it is magic, but John has the ability to get Torren excited one moment and sleeping the next. Torren will be asleep within minutes, you will see. Shortly after that, John will join us again."

"I'm not so sure about that," Dave contradicted, then clarified. "John coming out again, I mean. It's a little after 7:30 now. Most nights at this time, he's out for the count, sleeping until morning."

Teyla looked shocked at this as John Sheppard, on Atlantis, never went to bed prior to midnight. "And he does this every night?" Teyla asked worried.

"The doctors say it's normal. His body is still trying to adjust to the massive shock it had. That and he pushes himself to the point of exhaustion every day."

There was now complete silence coming from John's room so Teyla closed her eyes briefly. When she opened them she looked toward Dave and said, "You are correct. They are both asleep."

Julia walked over to the bedroom door to peer inside. She nodded with a big grin on her face and motioned for them to come over.

John was lying partially on his side with Torren snuggled in his arms. The boy's head was pillowed on John's chest and John's lips rested against the top of Torren's head. John's hand, behind Torren's back, held the ratty old bunny.

Teyla moved closer and adjusted the blankets so they fully covered both occupants. She drank in the sight of them for another few moments then followed Dave and Julia back to the den.

"I want to thank you for coming, Teyla," Dave began as Teyla got comfortable on the couch. "John's been pretty depressed since he got here. I've seen a huge improvement just in the last few hours."

"I am pleased that it has helped and that Sam was able to arrange it. I would do anything for John."

"And John would do anything for you, no matter the price or the danger," Dave said.

"Yes, I am aware," Teyla confirmed. "John has risked his life on many occasions to save mine."

They sat quietly for a short while until Teyla suggested, "I would love to hear more about John as a child."

Dave grinned and Julia crossed the room to the bookshelf and extracted a few photo albums. "We can do better than that," Julia said, "We can show you." Dave and Julia flanked Teyla on both sides and placed a photo album in her lap.

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xoxoxoxox xoxoxoxox xoxoxoxo

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Teyla awoke to the sound of music coming from outside her room. She quietly stepped out, not wanting to wake John but then realized the music was coming from the den and John and Torren were already awake. They were both reclined in the extra wide lounge chair watching the TV.

As Teyla approached them, John greeted, "Good morning, hungry?" and he held up a box of Froot Loops.

Teyla gave Torren a good morning kiss and returned John's greeting. "Did you and Torren sleep well last night?"

John nodded and answered, "Best sleep I've had since I got here," he then looked up like he was reconsidering, "Except when they knocked me out with the sedative a few weeks ago." He made a wry face.

Teyla looked at the screen and asked curiously, "What is that large purple creature and why is he talking?"

John's lopsided grin appeared and he explained, "That's Barney, he's a dinosaur. And it's just a show for kids. Torren seems to like it. Of course he liked Dragon Tales and Sesame Street, too."

At Teyla's raised eyebrow, John said, "We've been up for a while. Listen there's food in the fridge and the cabinets in the kitchen if you're hungry." He held up the box again. "Or you can join us?"

Torren's hand went back inside the box and pulled out a handful of the breakfast cereal and began putting them in his mouth. John's eyes narrowed and he faked a stern expression.

"Hey, where are mine?"

Torren immediately began feeding some to John.

"I think I will get ready first then eat," Teyla stated.

"Get ready for what?" John questioned. "None of the stores open until ten. It's only 7:15. And it's only us. No one cares that you're in your pajamas. We're still in ours."

He indicated him and Torren then looked at the familiar pair Teyla had on. "But if you need help with that tie, let me know. I have experience."

Teyla blushed at the mischievous twinkle in John's eyes and moved quickly through the closest door which led into the kitchen. Julia and Dave were just walking in from the other direction and Teyla accepted Julia's offer of an omelets.

"How long have they been up?" Dave asked and tilted his head in John's direction.

"I have only just awoken," Teyla responded, "But John says he and Torren have already viewed several of your television shows. Both he and Torren are very early risers."

"I've noticed that the past few weeks," Dave observed. "I'm going to see if John wants an omelet, too."

Teyla forestalled him. "He and Torren are eating those colorful rings he is so fond of."

Dave grinned, "He may still want something more substantial."

He walked to the door of the den and peered inside. He smiled when he saw John singing along with the purple dinosaur. " …won't you say you love me, too."

Torren took John's words at face value. He scooted around in John's lap so he was facing him and announced, "I luh you, Papa Bear!"

John took a deep breath while he placed the cereal box on the floor. He framed T.J.'s face with his hands and pulled it closer then whispered, "I love you, too, Baby Bear!" and then he kissed Torren's nose.

John smiled then began to rapidly kiss the boy's forehead, cheeks, neck and belly until he was squealing with delight.

Dave figured it was safe to enter. "Interested in an omelet?"

John's eyes narrowed, "Who's making it?"

"Julia."

"Okay, as long as it's not Teyla," John said.

"She doesn't make good omelets?" Dave guessed.

"She doesn't make good anything."

"John!" snapped Teyla who suddenly appeared in the doorway next to Dave. "Then I will not bother cooking for you again."

John looked hopeful, "You promise?"

Teyla's eyes narrowed and her mouth got thin. John realized she might really be mad so he grabbed for her hand before she could move away. Dave chuckled and figured it was a good time to leave.

Teyla pulled against John's hand as she glared at him. Teyla was strong but most of John's upper body strength had returned so he still had an advantage over her. When her grip slackened for a second, John pulled.

Teyla stepped forward with the momentum but tripped on the cereal box causing her to fall backwards into John's lap. Her back was against one padded armrest with her legs dangling over the other.

She attempted to get up but Torren, who had moved to accommodate his mother, now plunked himself in her lap making it impossible for her to move.

"You're not really mad, Teyla, are you?" John asked nervously.

Teyla remained silent and stared across the room. She knew if she kept it up, it was possible to get John to grovel. That could be interesting.

"Come on, Teyla," John coaxed, "Let's face it. You have many talents in many areas but cooking just isn't one of them."

Teyla continued to remain silent until John's hesitant, "Teyla?"

"Many talents?" she hinted for more information, "Such as …"

"You're a natural born leader, a great diplomat, an amazing negotiator," John listed. "You kick ass as a warrior, you're a wonderful, loving Mom, you're an incredibly beautiful woman," Teyla's eyes glanced up at this one, "And you're an unbelievably forgiving person when one of your friends says something stupid that inadvertently hurts your feelings."

Teyla adopted a smug smile as she shifted slightly so her head was almost resting on John's shoulder. "It is true I am not a very good cook," she stated calmly.

John paused for a second realizing what she'd said then he closed his eyes, leaned back his head and laughed silently.

"And you think I am beautiful." Teyla gloated, pleased.

John pursed his lips and said, "I was just stating facts." But when he looked at her face almost glowing with the compliment, he added, "But yeah, I do."

Torren started clapping at something on the screen so John and Teyla settled back and watched with him, both extremely aware of their prospective positions.

When the show was almost over, John started singing along with the enthusiastic dinosaur. "I love you, you love me. We're a happy family. With a great big hug and a kiss from me to you, won't you say you love me, too?"

John didn't dare breath, wondering what Teyla's reaction to the lyrics would be but Torren, always good with timing, clapped his hands and yelled to the screen, "I luh you!"

John and Teyla both chuckled and Teyla looked thoughtful. "This talking creature has an admirable philosophy. Many people could benefit from his teachings."

John nodded his head. "We could set him loose among the Wraith. I think people on this planet would be very grateful." He cocked his head then finished, "Although we'd probably just end up with a giant purple raisin."

Teyla was confused by what John said but instead of explaining it he changed the subject. "You haven't said and I haven't asked but how long are you here until?"

"We will be leaving at night on the fourth day from today. The day you call Monday."

John gave a half smile but it never quite made it to his eyes. He was absolutely thrilled they were here but four days just wasn't enough time.

Torren was already engrossed in the next cartoon that came on the screen and Teyla settled more comfortably on John's shoulder with one hand rubbing her son's back. As much as he was enjoying Teyla in his lap, he was confused by her behavior. She hadn't really planned to be in this position but now that she was, she didn't seem in a hurry to move.

He wondered what Kanaan would think of this. Damn! Why did he have to be so freakin' conscientious? With no Kanaan in the picture, John could pull Teyla closer and run his hands over the silky pajamas that he liked so much. He could tilt her head up and trace her gorgeous pink lips with his tongue and …

Whoa! Stop right there! He needed to stop and remember there was a Kanaan and he had absolutely no right to have Teyla sitting in his lap this way, no matter how innocent the circumstances. He turned his head toward the door and yelled, "Julia! Those omelets ready, yet?"

.

.

xoxoxoxoxo xoxoxoxox xoxoxoxo

.

"Are you sure you want to go in here?" Dave asked again. "You know I could probably get you in with my stylist if I tried."

John just glared at his brother. "A Barber Shop is fine," John insisted as Dave helped him get over the threshold. The women had taken off as early as they could, dropping the guys at a men's store so John could get a suit.

John had taken minimal time, just wanting something functional but Dave had fussed over brand names and styles. Until John had called him a girl then he had shut up.

They'd gotten Torren an outfit, too. Again Dave's opinion ran to the higher end but John stated Khaki's and a polo shirt would be fine for a two year old. The only extra he'd added was a cute little pair of red suspenders. But John had spent enough time in the past pulling up T.J.'s droopy pants that he knew suspenders would be functional, too.

"Hey, there," the Barber greeted as John rolled into the shop. "What can I do for you?"

"I need to be able to see again," John quipped as he blew the long strands out of his face. "And we're gonna see if this guy will cooperate long enough to fix his vision as well."

"Okay," the barber said but then paused and looked at the wheelchair.

"I can get into the chair, don't worry," John assured him and proceeded to do it.

"I'll move this out of your way," Dave offered as he took the chair then said, "I'm just going to read the newspaper on the bench outside, John. Do you need me to take T.J.?"

"Nope," John denied, "He's gotta see me get my hair cut so he knows it doesn't hurt. Go ahead. I'll call you if I need you."

Dave walked out and John grinned, "It's a little too bucolic in here for him."

The barber bent in front of Torren and asked, "Do you want a better seat to see your old man get his hair cut?" Torren's eyes lit up and the man scooped him up and placed him in the chair next to John.

"Name's Tom," he stuck his hand out and John took it saying, "John, and that's T.J."

"Nice to meet you. Now let's get started." Tom pulled out a plastic cape and set it around John's shoulders. As he was folding under John's collar, he noticed the dog tags.

"What branch of the military?" he asked as he wet down John's hair and picked up a pair of scissors.

"Air Force."

"I was Army for twelve years myself. You want this a military cut then?"

"Nah, just shorter," John replied. "It may be a while before I'm back on base."

Tom started cutting and nodded at the wheelchair. "That happen in the line of duty?"

John just nodded. Tom continued to chatter away. "What rank ya' at?"

"Colonel."

Tom stopped cutting and asked, "Full?"

At John's nod he moved the scissors to his other hand and gave a snappy salute. He went back to working on John's hair. "But I'm guessing you're no desk jockey. Air Force, huh? You a pilot?"

John gave yet another nod. Tom moved around to John's front and said, "When did that happen?" again indicating the wheelchair.

"Two months ago."

"They lettin' you stay in?"

John sighed, "Hopefully. I'm still in rehab so I guess it all depends on if I can get these legs moving again or not."

"If you're determined enough, you'll do it." insisted Tom.

John smiled, encouraged, "That's what I'm aiming for."

Tom continued to cut, making a few comments here and there about the abundance of cowlicks on John's head. He finished trimming up the sideburns and brushed the hair off the cape. He looked at Torren and said, "What do you think?"

Torren just looked at the man wide-eyed. "Okay, give him a thumbs-up," he showed the boy what to do, "and say, 'Looking good, Daddy'."

T.J. copied the gesture and mimicked, "Lootin' dood, Daddy!"

John chuckled but knew he was being wistful at T.J.'s words.

"Your turn, now. You ready?"

Torren nodded his head but held his arms out for John. Tom picked him up and delivered him to John's lap. "I can do him sitting right there, if you think he'll go for it."

"Let's try it," John decided. A small cape was put on and his hair wet.

"Anything special for him?"

"A regular little's boy's cut but not too short. His Mom'll skin me alive."

Tom got started and John immediately began talking to the boy about Easter and the Easter Bunny and the big egg hunt PSI put on every year. As Tom finished Torren's hair and started cleaning up the mess, he asked, "So how do you get to go to the big egg hunt at Sheppard Industries? You've got to be an employee or a real good friend, right?"

"I guess," John shrugged. "We'll go with my brother, Dave," John pointed out the window and clarified, "…Sheppard."

Tom suddenly looked at him differently asking, "You're John Sheppard of Sheppard Industries?"

"No," John said firmly. "I'm John Sheppard of the United States Air Force. That…" he again pointed out the window, "Is David Sheppard of Patrick Sheppard Industries. I have absolutely nothing to do with PSI. We're just going to let T.J. do some egg hunting Sunday."

"Fair enough," Tom smiled and brought John's chair over for him. After John was settled with T.J. in his lap, he gave Tom a few bills and headed for the door. As Tom helped him through, he said, "Good luck, son. I wish you well."

John shook his hand and thanked him. Dave got up and started pushing the wheelchair down the sidewalk to where they were supposed to meet Julia and Teyla.

When Torren saw his mother, he wiggled off John's lap and ran to her. "Loot Mama, we dot a hair tut!"

"Yes, you did!" Teyla smiled widely. "You both look very handsome!"

"Handsome, huh?" John teased and they moved toward the car.

They decided to stop somewhere for lunch and when they were settled at a table and John's wheelchair moved out of the way, he asked, "So, did you find a nice Easter dress?"

"Yes," Teyla replied happily. "Julia is most knowledgeable regarding the type of clothing and colors that look best on each individual."

"She gets in a lot of practice," Dave muttered and was rewarded with an elbow in his side.

"And we even had time to put color on our fingernails to match our dresses." Teyla held out her hands to show them. Her fingernails were a pail shade of peach.

She leaned in close to John and whispered, "We even had our toenails colored!"

John chuckled at the almost scandalized tone in her voice. He wiggled his eyebrows and whispered back, "I can't wait to see."

Teyla realized he was teasing her so she sat back and looked at the menu. John helped Torren and Teyla pick items off the menu as some of the food they'd never heard of.

The waitress had just brought their salads when a voice behind John's shoulder said, "Sheppard, how are you?"

John wondered for a moment who'd be here that he knew when Dave stood up and John remembered that he was a Sheppard, too.

"Ted! I'm great. Barbara, you look lovely as usual."

John looked up and saw a couple, probably in their late fifties, pausing behind T.J. The man shook hands with Dave and looked down at the table. "Don't let us interrupt you. I just stopped over to say hi."

Dave looked down and pointed, "You've met my fiancée, Julia, right?" At their nod and greeting, he continued, "And this is my brother, John and Teyla and T.J."

John shook hands with the man and nodded at the woman. Dave finished the introduction, "This is Ted and Barbara Downey. Ted does a good deal of business with the company. You're bringing those grandkids to the Easter Egg hunt Sunday, right?" Dave insisted of the couple.

"Wouldn't miss it," Ted smiled to the group but John noticed the man's eyes narrow and his smile slip just a bit when he looked at him. Had the man known his father and heard stories or had John somehow annoyed him already?

John didn't really care but his question was answered almost an hour later when Julia had slipped into the ladies 'room and Dave was across the restaurant schmoozing with another business acquaintance. Ted was strolling back from the men's room and stopped back at the table.

"John," he began seriously, "Let me give you a little piece of advice. Your brother's an important man in this community and it's essential that he present a professional and respectable front at all times."

At John's confused look, he continued, "He doesn't need his brother sitting next to him being disrespectful and ill-mannered. I knew your father well and I know he would have taught you to stand in the presence of a lady."

"Oh," John said, "That's what this is about?"

"Yes," Ted confirmed. "So the advice is, don't make your brother look bad with your lack of manners."

John's jaw tensed and he said through gritted teeth, "Understood."

The man walked away and Teyla's eyes grew intense as she leaned toward John who was still staring off into the distance with his face like granite.

"Why did you not defend yourself to that man?" Teyla demanded. "He should know that it is because you are physically unable to stand right now and not lack of manners that…"

"It doesn't matter, Teyla," John interrupted. "If he'd insulted you or Torren, I would have popped him one, but I really don't care what he thinks of me."

"I care what he thinks of you," Teyla stated, "especially when that thinking is incorrect. Perhaps I should have … popped him one."

John laughed and moved his face closer to hers. "That I'd like to have seen. It's kind of nice having you defend me."

Teyla covered John's hand with hers and declared, "I would defend you with my life, John."

His eyes turned sincere. "I know you would, Teyla." He looked down at her hand on his, patted it with his own and said, "Thanks for that."

Julia and Dave both arrived back at the same time and asked if there was any place else they needed or wanted to go.

"I hate to be a party pooper," John said with regret, "But I think Torren's probably due for a nap."

Dave gazed at John with a knowing look and John added chagrined, "Okay, he might not be the only one."

The trip home was quick and purchases put away. John quickly claimed the recliner and invited Torren to join him. "Grab your giraffe and blanket and come on up here."

Torren gathered his things and John scooped him into the chair and reclined it completely. Torren started to snuggle against him when he perked his head up, climbed down and ran into John's room. He returned a moment later with John's bunny and climbed back up. He then snuggled into John's side again with his animal and blanket, handing John his to snuggle with.

"Thanks Pal," John said.

Teyla was standing, watching in the doorway with a content smile on her face so John patted the spot next to him and offered, "We can make room if you're interested."

Teyla was more than interested. The thought of lying so intimately next to John brought a surge of desire through her. But she needed to tell him about Kanaan. She knew John was still under the impression that they were together. His inhibitions had been a bit freer here on Earth but she knew there was still a line he would not cross.

The time had not been right yet to tell him. She needed some time when they were alone and she knew they would not be disturbed. She hoped that time would come soon.

"You two have your rest," Teyla directed. "I will continue looking at these picture books from when you were a young boy. They are fascinating."

John groaned as Teyla opened a photo album but pulled Torren in closer and both were asleep in minutes. As Teyla looked at the young John Sheppard, and the adult one in the chair lying with her son, she wished for the day when it would be acceptable to join them.

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xoxoxoxoxo xoxoxoxoxo xoxoxoxoxo

.

"So we need a road going to the farm. You ready to build one?" John directed Torren as they sat on the floor surrounded by blocks. While John and T.J. had napped, Dave had pulled a big box out of the attic. It had contained a play farm, a roadway set, toy construction vehicles and a large assortment of blocks.

Torren was in heaven but John seemed pretty happy, too. They'd moved the stuff to the large formal living room since it had tons of open space and hardwood floors. The Sheppards had used it primarily for entertaining but John had always thought it was a great room for building cities. And he still thought so.

He and T.J. moved the construction vehicles around, making all sorts of accompanying truck noises. The roads were laid and the blocks became cities. Torren pushed one of the toy cars along the road until it came to the farm on the edge of the city.

He picked up some of the animals and asked John, "What dat?"

John scooted over to T.J. and said, "These are all animals on the farm."

Torren got excited and said, "Lite Ode MitDonoo?"

John laughed and said, "Yes, just like Old MacDonald. Hey, maybe this is his farm."

Torren clapped and picked up some of the animals so John started telling him what the animals were and what sounds they made.

"That's a cow," John said.

"Tow doe MOO!" Torren giggled then held up a pig.

"Pig," John stated and Torren called, "OINT, OINT!"

"That's close enough, Pal." Jon chuckled and looked up when he heard another laugh from the doorway. Teyla was standing there smiling with a small video camera in front of her face.

"T. J., what is Mommy doing?" John asked as he made a face.

Torren looked up and showed Teyla an animal. "Mama, tow doe MOO!"

"Yes, I see you have been busy boys in here. Such a creation!" She moved the video camera to encompass the 'city' then lowered it.

"I want to get as much of you and Torren on camera as I am able. It is easier to get him calm when I tell him we can 'watch' Uncle John. He has missed your time together immensely. I am hoping if I have enough recordings of the two of you playing together maybe it will somehow ease the burden of your absence."

"I get it." John understood. "I'm really sorry, Teyla. I know it must be hard on T.J. when he's used to hanging out with me."

"You should feel no need to apologize, John. You are hardly to blame for your condition."

John nodded then said, "I hope Kanaan's been spending more time with him and in the city helping you."

Teyla debated telling John right then but Torren was right there and she wasn't sure she wanted to get in this discussion in front of him. He may only be two but he understood a great deal. "Do not worry, John. I have had many people step in to help with the care of Torren."

She moved around the 'city' and toward a bench near the large Palladian windows. "What is this, John?" She asked as she sat on the bench near a large piece of furniture.

"It's a piano," John replied and then realized that wasn't very helpful as an answer. "It's a musical instrument."

Teyla swiveled on the bench and studied it, looking confused. "It is quite large. How does one play it?"

John moved closer himself. "Some pianos are a lot smaller but this is called a Grand Piano. My Dad insisted we have the biggest and best of everything, of course."

With Teyla's help, John managed to climb up next to her on the bench. He lifted the cover off the keys and slid it smoothly inside with Teyla's startled, "Oh, I see," coming from her lips.

John ran his fingers over the keys, testing them out and playing a few scales. Torren, not wanting to miss out on anything, toddled over. Teyla scooped him up, sat him next to John and picked up the video camera again then moved back a few steps to sit on a nearby chair.

"You ready for some music, Pal?" John asked and the enthusiastic clapping was all that was needed.

John started playing and singing "Old MacDonald had a farm, E I E I O."

As he sang, Torren jumped in with the required animal sounds. John segued into 'Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star' and then a medley involving 'Row Your Boat', 'Yankee Doodle', 'Oh, Susanna', and 'Oh my Darlin' Clementine'.

He'd been practicing at the center lately with scales and some old songs he remembered, but he hadn't done anything fancy. He was curious to see how much he still remembered and could do, so he flexed his fingers a bit and started the 'Peanuts Theme Song'.

He knew Teyla and Torren wouldn't know the song but it always made him nostalgic. Maybe he'd have to rent one of the Charlie Brown movies and show Torren, he'd probably love it.

John's fingers flew over the keys and he smiled when he realized his motor skills were vastly improved. He'd been working diligently ever since the shoe tying fiasco, doing OT exercises that Mary had shown him. He almost felt like he could do anything.

He gave himself another test by seeing how well he could do 'Beethoven's Fifth Symphony'. He had joked about playing it the day he'd met Julia but the question was; could he really do it? His fingers played the first few notes then seemed to have a memory of their own.

John couldn't believe that he actually remembered all the notes but then that had always been the easiest part of playing. His mind had a way with numbers and patterns that most people couldn't understand, and music was just patterns. He'd always been that way but when his father had started pushing him to use his amazing number sense for the family business, John had tried to hide it as best he could.

And he still did. Every now and then he'd forget and something would pop out. It was usually McKay who caught that John had done some ridiculously quick calculation and John would have to do some fancy footwork to get McKay's mind away from what he'd done.

He finished up the classical piece and thought that would be enough. But he almost felt like he had something to prove, to himself at least. He took a deep breath and mumbled, "Okay, here's the real test. T.J., I'm gonna have you stand over here for this one," and he moved the child to the floor a few feet away.

John shook his hands out and flexed his fingers one more time. This was it! Again, his fingers moved to the keys like they were going home after a long absence. He started off a bit slower then quickly went into overdrive as 'Flight of the Bumblebee' raced across the keys and through the room.

When he was done his hands dropped to his lap and he noticed he was breathing a bit harder than usual. But he had done it with barely a mistake.

A gasp came from behind him as Julia and Dave crossed the room from the other doorway. "That was the most amazing thing I've ever seen!" Julia gushed and held her hand over her heart.

Teyla agreed. "That was truly breathtaking, John. I had not realized you possessed such talent."

John looked and saw the camera sitting inert in Teyla's lap and sighed, "You didn't have that on the whole time, did you?"

Teyla had indeed recorded the entire performance only putting it down when John had finished. But she knew how self-conscious John was and how much he hated attention drawn to himself so she prevaricated a bit, "I was so entranced by your skill, I may have accidentally stopped recording."

John looked a bit relieved and said, "That's fine, Teyla."

Torren wanted attention again so John scooped him up into his lap and allowed him to press some of the keys. Julia was still flabbergasted. "David said you could play really well, but that was … I can't even describe what that was. And you didn't even have any music in front of you for any of it," she pointed out, her mouth still hanging open.

"John never needed it once he learned a piece," Dave said. "It used to amaze our piano teacher."

"You play as well?" Teyla asked Dave.

Dave chuckled, "You can't even call what I do playing, not after seeing John play. And I haven't really touched the keys in years."

John shook his head, "I've been fooling around on the piano at the rehab center for a while to improve my dexterity but I haven't done any serious playing in over ten years."

Teyla moved closer and put her hand on John's shoulder. "Then you truly have a gift, John."

"You know he's not bad on the guitar, either," Dave announced.

"That I have heard him play," Teyla stated. "He will sometimes play for Torren although he does not like to perform or allow other people to know of his skill."

Dave grinned, "Mom used to have to threaten him to get him in a suit and go to the yearly recital. Dad would drag him in and he'd be all rumpled by the time he showed up on stage."

"I hated those things," John declared. "Hours of listening to a bunch of kids screw up what could have been decent music."

"But then you'd come on and blow them all out of the water. Me included," Dave chuckled. "I was one of those kids butchering the music."

"Yeah, you were!" John agreed.

"I'd love to hear you play more," Julia suggested. "But we really came in here to tell you dinner's ready."

John's wheelchair was brought to him and permission granted to keep the 'city' standing for now. As they all strolled toward the kitchen, John looked back at the piano and a sly grin split his face. It was really such a small thing but to him it felt like he'd just crossed one of the biggest hurdles in his path. Now he knew he was ready for the next one.

.

.

xoxoxoxoxo xoxoxoxoxo xoxoxoxoxo

.

Dinner was over, dishes were done and the 'men' had settled in the den while Julia gave Teyla some tips on cooking in the kitchen. John had commented that they were wasting their time and had gotten a dish towel to the head in response.

"You are fortunate I do not have my sticks with me for you would pay dearly if I did," Teyla had threatened and John had quickly moved away before she found something else she could use.

Now he had Torren in his lap and was reading him another in a long line of stories. They were on the couch as Dave had called 'dibs' on his recliner for the night and was channel surfing.

John looked at his watch and declared, "Just about time for bed, Pal. Go get your stuff and I'll help you put your jammies on."

Torren hopped off into his room and appeared a few seconds later with his backpack. He climbed on the couch next to John who started pulling things out of the bag. The blanket and giraffe appeared followed by a pair of little pajamas and then John's brows knit together in bemusement.

"Hey, Teyla?" He called into the kitchen. She showed up in the doorway a few seconds later.

"Do you need my assistance, John?"

"No," John replied and pulled a red piece of fabric out of the bag to show her. "I'm … just wondering why my shirt is in T.J.'s bag?"

Teyla looked chagrined, leaned against the doorframe and took a deep breath. "After you left it was quite difficult getting Torren to sleep every night. So one night, in desperation, we went to your quarters and borrowed that shirt. Ronon claimed it was your scent that soothed Torren to sleep at night so I thought perhaps something with your scent on it would help. That," she pointed to the shirt, "was in your hamper."

"If it was in my hamper, it must have had some scent on it," John observed. "Did it work?"

"Yes," Teyla replied, "that and the fact that I allowed him to sleep in your bed that night. After that, the shirt was all that was needed. You are not upset?"

John smiled a sad smile and said, "Whatever you need to do to get by, Teyla, you do it. But if Torren slept in my bed all night, where …?"

"I also slept in your bed that night," Teyla filled in. "I hope you do not mind and I borrowed one of your t-shirts to sleep in as well."

John almost groaned at the image of Teyla in his bed wearing only his shirt. Teyla was still looking at him with concern so John assured her, "Teyla, it's fine. I don't mind at all. If you want, you can take a few more of my dirty shirts back with you."

He looked at Torren who was curled up next to him with his blanket, giraffe and his thumb in his mouth. "What do you think, Baby Bear? You want to take a few of my stinky shirts back home with you?"

Torren smiled around his thumb then popped it out long enough to say, "You tum home!"

John sucked in a deep breath as a sharp pain lanced through his gut. John started putting Torren's pajamas on for a distraction as he answered in a voice that sounded like gravel, "I will soon. Promise."

The pajamas were on so he stood the boy up. "Time for brushing the teeth and using the bathroom."

John looked toward his wheelchair but Teyla came over and offered, "I will take him, John. It will be quicker."

They returned a few minutes later and T.J. climbed back into John's lap. John did his typical all over smooches and raspberries, eliciting squeals from Torren then pulled him close and started whispering in his ear. The magic took effect and Torren was soon asleep.

Julia watched from the doorway tilting her head at Dave. "I hope you're taking notes for when it's your turn."

Dave's eyes glimmered with mischief as he grinned, "Ha, that'll be the nanny's job."

Julia's look of outrage disappeared when she saw not only the smirk on David's face but those on John and Teyla's as well. Two could play at this game.

She moved to sit on the arm of Dave's recliner and casually commented, "A nanny, huh? Only if he's as good looking as your brother there."

That unfamiliar flare of jealousy reared its ugly head again then he saw John's eyes close in a silent chuckle. His hands reached up and grabbed his fiancée around the waist. "You are such a trouble maker. Sometimes I wonder why I put up with you."

His hands startled her and she slid backwards into Dave's lap. She immediately wrapped her arms around his neck and whispered, "Because you'd be completely lost without me."

Dave seemed to consider this for a second then pronounced, "Maybe."

"Maybe?" Julia repeated. "Well maybe you'll have to find someone else to do this." And she pressed her lips against his.

Dave returned the pressure until he heard John grumble, "If you're gonna do that, at least toss the remote over here."

"No, no, no!" Julia protested and moved Dave over in the recliner so they were sitting side by side. She grabbed the remote and explained, "There's a movie on in a few minutes I want to see."

"It's not a chick flick is it?" Dave asked apprehensively.

"No!" Julia snorted. "It's got bombs and guns and all that stuff you testosterone filled men love." Then muttered under her breath, "And the leading man is gorgeous!"

Dave glared at her while John exclaimed, "Excellent!" but made sure Torren was asleep as the movie probably wasn't appropriate for a two year old. Teyla offered to take her son but John refused, "You both are only here for a few days. I've got to get my fill now."

After a few commercial breaks, John finally accepted, "Okay, I guess I should probably put him in bed now." But he was frustrated when he realized there was no way of getting in the wheelchair with T.J. in his arms.

Teyla moved closer but John suggested, "Julia, you said Dave needed practice, right?"

Dave just chuckled and lowered the recliner. "I'd be happy to help."

He reached for the boy and John lifted his arms. Teyla moved toward her room announcing, "I will turn down the covers."

Dave just stood there for a few minutes holding the child, looking down at his sleeping face wondering what had his brother so enthralled. The peaceful innocence of the slumbering boy filled Dave with a mixture of emotion that lifted his heart and made him feel good.

"This is nice! I think I get it now."

John looked up with a secret smile. "And when they're your own, it's even more amazing."

John's face fell when he realized what he'd just said so he backtracked, "I mean when you've known them since they were born and see them grow along the way." He chewed on his lip as his eyes darted over to the bedroom door to see if Teyla had heard him.

Dave carried the sleeping child into the bedroom thinking of the slip of the tongue John had just made. He wondered what Freud would think of it. He knew what he thought. John loved this kid like his own. But Dave pretty much already knew that from watching them together in the past.

Teyla thanked Dave as they got Torren settled in the bed and followed him back out to the den. Dave retook his seat sharing the recliner with Julia but Teyla noticed John had moved to the middle of the sectional and was attempting to get his legs up on the couch.

Teyla lifted his jean clad legs but confessed, "I should not have helped you since you now occupy the space where my back was resting."

John looked around and realized Teyla was correct. She'd been leaning against the cushion on his right with her legs stretched on the left side of the sectional. But if he moved to the end he wouldn't have a good view of the TV and his legs were in definite need of some elevation.

He grabbed a large throw pillow and propped it against his left side. "Here," he offered. Lean against this and you can still stretch your legs out on that side."

Teyla accepted the compromise and settled against the pillow, very aware that John's arm rested on the back of the couch just inches from her shoulder.

They continued to watch the movie and Teyla knew exactly when John fell asleep. His arm started to slide down the back of the couch toward her arm. It was not really comfortable for her at that angle so she moved it so it slanted down from her shoulder across her chest with his hand resting near hers at the waist.

She knew John was completely unaware of their position but Teyla took what pleasure she could at the contact. She occasionally noticed the eyes of Julia or Dave flick toward them but they never stayed for long.

Julia had asked her this morning about Kanaan while they were shopping. She hadn't felt right telling this woman, whom she had just met, that she and Kanaan were no more, certainly not before John knew. So she gave an ambiguous answer and quickly changed the subject.

But she liked this woman very much. She was honest and intelligent and had been extremely helpful in assisting Teyla navigate the stores. And she had spoken of John and how much she was growing to love this brother of her intended.

Teyla knew this was not a difficult thing. John was very easy to love. She had been doing it for many years. Loving John for many years! Had she just admitted that to herself for the first time? She always knew of her deep feelings for John but she'd never put them into words, even in her mind.

But now she had to admit to herself she was in love with John Sheppard. She had been in love with him for many years; perhaps even from the first time they had met. He had spoken to her with respect and dignity and a trace of humor, even though his superior did not approve.

She did not like to speak ill of the dead but Colonel Sumner had not made a good first impression and she had been more than happy to send them on their way. That is until John had stepped forward, with his unkempt hair and charming grin, and started speaking of things she had no knowledge of. But he had intrigued her, enough to offer them morning tea.

John had turned the charm smile up a notch as he told them he loved a good cup of tea, they were almost friends already.

Teyla leaned into John's arm as she came back to the present. Once she told John about Kanaan she hoped things could proceed between the two of them. But somewhere in the back of her mind was a fear that their relationship would just remain the same. They had gone years before Kanaan where John had not 'made a move' so why did she think he would now.

She knew on Atlantis it was a difficult situation as she was a member of John's team. She understood that was probably a large part of why he had never attempted anything more than friendship.

But in the last year or so of John assisting with Torren, she had felt a subtle shift in him. But now the presence of Kanaan stood in the way. And John was too good a man to interfere in what he thought was a serious relationship.

Even though it had not been much more than a day that she had been on Earth with John, she sensed a difference. Perhaps it was because all the typical dangers were not present or because Woolsey, Landry or the IOA were not here to tell him what to do or maybe it was because he was no longer officially her superior, but there was a change in him.

The professional curtain had been pulled back a bit and she was being exposed to what was behind it. Unfortunately she only had a few days left to pull the curtain completely down before she was millions of light years away again. She needed to tell him about Kanaan, that was the first step. Maybe she would enlist Julia's assistance in providing her and John some time alone.

She closed her eyes, leaning further into John's arm and playing in her mind what she would say to him if she got the chance tomorrow.

When the movie ended Teyla reluctantly removed John's arm and turned to face him. "John," she called softly as she shook his shoulder. Nothing happened so she placed both hands on his chest and leaned in closer.

"John, wake up!" His eyes flew open and his hands grabbed her upper arms.

"What!" he yelled and pulled Teyla closer before he'd fully woken up.

"Down boy!" Dave joked. "She's just trying to tell you it's time for bed. Although you've been out for almost an hour so I guess you already knew that. Do you need any help?"

John shook his head to clear it and said, "No, I'm all set."

Dave and Julia headed upstairs saying good night as they left.

"If you let go, I will get your wheelchair for you," Teyla instructed. John loosened his grip but didn't release her arms. He liked her up close like this, her hands resting on his chest. She was so close he figured that if he moved his head even slightly he could probably touch her lips with his.

What would she do if he actually kissed her? Their first, and only, kiss hadn't exactly been a success. But then his DNA had been mutating and he hadn't been himself. But if he was being honest, the DNA mutation hadn't made him feel differently about Teyla, it had just loosened up his inhibitions and encouraged his libido to act. It had removed the tight control he usually had on his emotions and actions.

But they had decided not to speak of it again. That didn't mean he couldn't remember what her lips had felt like under his, the taste of them, and her, in his mouth and on his tongue.

He continued to stare at her lips until she questioned, "John, are you all right?"

He blinked his eyes a few times as if waking from a dream and assured her, "Yeah, fine. Sorry, still fuzzy from sleeping I guess."

Teyla brought over his wheelchair and asked if they should practice standing. He nodded and he enjoyed another few moments with her arms around his waist and his hands on her shoulders. Once in his room, they practiced again and he realized that holding Teyla was great motivation.

He almost forgot that his legs weren't strong enough to hold him up yet. He leaned on her a bit more as the seconds passed and her arms moved more securely around his back.

"You are doing wonderful, John!" Teyla praised as several more seconds ticked by. But even motivation wasn't enough for the weakened muscles in his legs to continue holding him, albeit, with help.

He felt his legs begin to give out and reflexively he held on tighter to Teyla. The result being John lying on his back on the bed and Teyla sprawled across him.

"Sorry," John choked out. "Guess I forgot I couldn't actually stand for a second there."

"Do not worry about it, John," Teyla reassured him as she reluctantly straightened up from her prone position. "I will say good night as well unless you need me for something else."

I need you for a lot of things, John thought but answered, "I'm all set, Teyla, thanks. Good night!"

He pushed himself to his elbows as Teyla closed the door behind her. That's when he realized his pajama pants were in the dresser across the room. He looked at the wheelchair next to the bed but knew he didn't have the energy to get into it, roll to the dresser, and then get out again.

He unbuttoned and removed his shirt, pulled off his jeans and threw them both onto the wheelchair. He slid under the covers and shut the light off, drifting quickly back into slumber.

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xoxoxoxox xoxoxoxoox xoxoxoxoxo

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"Papa Bear?"

The softly whispered words permeated John's brain and he slowly opened his eyes. It took a second for them to adjust to the darkness but when they did he realized his door was open a bit and he could see muted light from the hallway. Bathroom light, maybe?

Then he heard it again, a little whimper and a whispered, "Papa Bear?"

His eyes adjusted more to the darkness and he recognized a little head resting on little arms on the edge of the bed.

"T.J.?" John checked and saw the little head move. "Hey, Baby Bear, are you all right? What's the matter?"

"I seep with you?" the little voice whined.

John pushed up on his elbows and leaned toward the boy. He reached out and managed to pull the child onto the bed next to him. The boy crawled closer and leaned right into John's chest. John's heart did a tiny flip like it always did when T.J. snuggled up in his arms, putting his complete trust in him.

"Hey, Pal, does your Mom know you're here? Of course she doesn't, it's the middle of the night."

John figured he had a few options. He could get in his wheelchair and roll Torren back to his room. Although he was pretty sure the kid would put up a fuss and end up waking Teyla. And then he might try to come over here again later anyway. But getting in and out of his wheelchair really wasn't an easy job, especially when you're half asleep.

The second option would be to yell for Teyla until she woke up and came and got T.J. But who knew how deeply Teyla slept and even though Dave and Julia were upstairs in another part of the house, he didn't want to chance waking them.

The third option was to just let the kid sleep here for the rest of the night. His door was open so when Teyla woke up and realized Torren was missing, she could see right in here and see that he was fine. Personally he liked option three, especially since it meant that he didn't really need to do anything.

He pulled the covers down a bit and said, "Crawl under," and Torren willingly obliged then settled himself back in the crook of John's arm. John pulled the covers back up and wrapped his arms more firmly around the child.

A mumbled and sleepy, "Luh you, Papa Bear," floated up to his ears.

John closed his eyes and whispered back, "I love you too, Baby Bear."

He knew he shouldn't get too used to this. Torren and Teyla only had a few more days left here and then they'd be gone, a few million light years away. And he knew he still had quite a bit of time here in rehab before he'd be ready for active duty and able to get back to Atlantis.

He held Torren close, trying to absorb as much of him as he could. Whatever he could get this weekend was going to have to last him a very long time.

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xoxoxoxox xoxoxoxoxo xoxoxoxoxo

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Teyla's eyes fluttered open as the rays of the sun streamed through the windows to kiss her cheek. As she stretched her arms over her head, she noticed the covers next to her were pulled down and the bed empty.

She quickly sat up and called quietly, "Torren?"

The clock on the bedside table read 7:40 a.m. Torren and John must already be up, probably watching some show for children. She got out of bed and smiled at the thought then frowned when she heard no sound coming through the opened doorway.

She walked into the hallway and saw John's door was open somewhat but the quick peek revealed no movement and John's form still under the covers.

She moved through the den and into another hallway and headed for the large room the 'boys' had been building their 'city' in. It was empty as well. She made her way back through the house where she found Julia dressed and pulling pans out of the cabinet.

"Have you seen Torren?" Teyla asked concern in her voice. "He was gone when I awoke a short while ago."

"No, I haven't," Julia answered. "Isn't he with John?"

"John is still asleep."

"And T.J.'s not with him?" Julia questioned.

"I did not see …" Teyla began then closed her eyes for a brief moment. A relieved sigh escaped her lips and she said, "That is exactly where he is."

She turned and gave a smile to Julia then moved toward John's room. She pushed his door open a little more and padded softly to the side of the bed where, she indeed, found her son.

He was lying with his head on John's chest, his hand tangled in the dog tags and his eyes were wide open. She sat next to him on the bed and he whispered, "Hi Mama."

"Good morning," Teyla uttered quietly. "You frightened me. I did not know where you were."

His eyes flicked toward her but his position didn't move. "I seep here, Mama."

Teyla just shook her head and rubbed her son's back. She could not be angry at him for wanting the comfort of John's arms. She had sought them out on occasion herself.

And she could sense the uncertainty in Torren in regard to John. The fear that John would go away again was prominent in the back of her son's mind and she wondered if he could sense that from her.

John's right arm was wrapped around Torren's back but his left arm was above his head and his eyes remained closed, his breathing even and rhythmic.

"We should let Uncle John rest," Teyla whispered and reached out to untangle her son's hand from John's dog tags. Torren's grasp of them was firm and both hands were needed to disengage his grip.

Once free, her left hand held Torren's and her right rested on John's chest with the dog tags still in them. She looked down at them resting in the sprinkling of hair but didn't move her hand away. Her hand longed to flatten out and explore the soft fur as it arrowed down his abdomen and encircled his navel. It disappeared under the covers and Teyla didn't dare let her imagination drift any further. Her hand moved of its own accord and fingered the dog tags again until a voice made her jump.

"You okay, Teyla?"

Teyla snatched her hand away and saw that John's eyes were open.

"John," Teyla startled. "I did not realize you were awake."

John moved his hand to lightly grasp Teyla's arm. "You looked a little out of it for a second."

Teyla smiled and said, "I was trying to remove Torren without waking you."

John looked at the clock and exclaimed, "Wow, it's late! I guess I'm not used to staying up much past 7:30 lately. And Torren woke me up in the middle of the night. I didn't think I could get him back over to your room very easily so I just let him sleep here. Sorry!"

"It is fine, John. I was concerned at first but then I sensed where he was."

John's eyes narrowed as he pushed himself into a sitting position. "How do you sense where he is?"

Teyla held her breath as the sheet slid lower until she noticed the waistband of his boxer shorts peeking out. She released the breath and answered, "He was feeling safe and comforted and very loved. That is the feeling he always has when he is with you."

It was John's turn to let out a breath. "That's uh …that's nice." He looked at Teyla's face and held her gaze. A soft knock on the open door interrupted the moment.

"John, you're awake," Julia noted. "Good! Pancakes will be ready in about five minutes," and she walked away from the door.

"Pantates!" Torren yelled and bounced on the bed between the two adults.

"Yes," Teyla responded, "and you should get dressed first."

"Otay, Mama," and the boy jumped off the bed and ran across the hall.

"I will allow you to get ready as well," Teyla addressed John.

"I won't make it in five minutes," John frowned. "Make sure to save me some though."

"Why …?" Teyla began and John finished, "It'll take me more than five minutes just to get my clothes out of the dresser. And then … trying to get pants on when your legs don't move and you can't stand up … that's a bit time consuming as well."

John lifted the sheet briefly, "And I can't very well go like this now, can I?"

Teyla stood up and claimed, "I will assist you. Where are the clothes you require?"

"Okay," John scooted closer to the edge of the bed and pointed, "Uh, top drawer, I need a clean pair of shorts and I can just wear these jeans again," as he grabbed the faded ones that were hanging on his wheelchair.

Teyla removed a pair of boxer shorts from the dresser and tossed them next to John on the bed. "You have one minute to change those while I make sure Torren is sufficiently clothed then I will return to assist you with the rest."

John's eyes darted nervously toward her as he stuttered, "Uh …Teyla, …I uh … I'm not …"

"Did Helen and Lisa not assist you in these tasks while you stayed at the center?" Teyla questioned in a no-nonsense tone.

"Well, yeah," John replied.

"Then think of my assistance as you would theirs."

"Okay," John slowly responded, still unsure about this plan. Sure Helen and Lisa had helped him many times but they'd never been the subject of his daydreams before.

Teyla walked out and closed the door and John realized he needed to put on the clean boxers before she came back. He had just barely gotten them up over his hips when Teyla knocked, walked back in and closed the door behind her.

She stood in front of John and picked up his jeans. "What is the best way to approach this?"

John moved so his legs hung over the edge of the bed but was still self conscious that he was sitting here in only his underwear. "Getting the pants over the feet and up the legs is easy enough; it's the thighs and hips I have a hard time with. I have to do it while I'm lying on my back. Not the easiest thing to do, especially when nothing moves down there."

"I can imagine," Teyla sympathized. "But you can stand for a short time now," she pointed out.

"But not by myself," John countered.

"What if you hold onto me while I pull them up?"

John looked thoughtful for a second and said, "That might work."

Teyla bent down and she and John got the jeans up to his knees. "I will help you stand. Hold tight to me and I will raise the pants as quickly as I can."

John just nodded and put his hands on Teyla's shoulders. She put one arm around him but kept the other on the jeans. They got John standing but when she let go to lift the jeans she felt more of John's weight settle on her.

She tugged quickly but at John's indrawn breath of, "Teyla!" she realized she had to pull them out a bit more in the front to accommodate part of John's anatomy. She got them all the way up and was about to button them when John informed her, "Going down!"

She quickly wrapped her arms around his waist and guided him back to sitting on the edge of the bed. She straightened up as John grimaced facetiously, "Now that wasn't too embarrassing." They looked at each other and both burst out laughing.

John leaned back to zip and button the pants then reached forward to snatch Teyla's hand and pulled her to stand close in front of him. "Thanks," he made a face. "Not very graceful but definitely quicker."

"What else do you require?" Teyla questioned.

"I can do the shirt once I'm in the chair. The pants are the real bitch to put on."

"Then I also need to change so I will not miss the pancakes."

John continued holding one hand but moved his other to the infamous tie on her pajamas.

"You know … I should repay the debt and help you change," he said and the twinkle in his eyes started to grow.

He started tugging lightly on the end of the thin cord. "I happen to have extensive experience with knots. This one in particular."

Teyla watched mesmerized as his hand continued to draw the cord toward him until the bow disappeared. John also appeared entranced as the initial cross started to loosen.

Julia's voice yelling, "Breakfast!" had John dropping the tie and Teyla taking a step back, both breathing heavier.

"Perhaps you will need to assist me another time," Teyla panted.

John glanced almost painfully up at Teyla and rasped, "Promise."

She gave a confused nod and said shakily, "I will meet you in the kitchen shortly."

She walked across the hall not bothering to close John's door. He figured it didn't matter considering what they had just done. He moved to his wheelchair, grabbed a navy blue polo shirt from his drawer and started rolling toward the kitchen, hoping the pancakes were worth it.

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xoxoxoxoxox xoxoxoxoxoxo xoxoxoxoxoo

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John and Torren spent much of the morning working in the 'city'. They'd even managed to get Dave involved. The ladies had made a quick run to the grocery store and then started working on pies to take to Julia's parent's house for Easter dinner.

Lunch was outdoors on the patio in recognition of the beautiful day. Teyla was just coming to sit down after moving John's wheelchair out of the way.

"Why is it you always move to a different seat?" Teyla inquired. "Would it not be easier to simply wheel the chair up to the table?"

Dave chuckled. "John thinks the wheelchair is a deterrent for picking up girls."

John's laugh came out deep and low. "Oh, yeah, I can picture that conversation now. 'Hey Babe, I spend all day in rehab trying to get useless legs to move and then go home to live with my brother. You interested?' Chicks will really fall for that one."

He laughed again then looked at Teyla. "Truthfully, my butt gets sore if I sit in that thing too long. And I really hate looking like a damned cripple. Just a little bit of denial, I guess."

"John, you're making incredible progress every day," Julia emphasized. "And I know you'll continue until that chair isn't needed anymore."

"I, too, have faith in your ability to fully recover. You have a strength and willpower that many do not possess. You must be patient," Teyla encouraged.

John took a deep breath and said, "I'm trying."

The conversation turned to Easter plans and wedding plans and other general topics. Teyla listened quietly as Julia and Dave had a conversation about some work related subject. She chuckled when she compared it to the in-depth conversation John was having with Torren about putting potato chips inside the sandwich to make it crunchy.

She closed her eyes and reveled in the emotion she felt coming from the two people most important in her life. As a smile lit up her face, Julia looked quizzically at Teyla.

"Teyla, can I ask you something? And you can tell me if I'm being ridiculous."

Teyla looked at Julia and said, "Of course."

"This morning when you were worried about where Torren was and I suggested he might be with John, you closed your eyes then looked relieved like you all of a sudden knew. And the other day you did it also when you claimed that both John and Torren were already asleep. Just now you closed your eyes and looked…I don't know how to describe it but you got a big smile on your face."

John leaned over near Teyla and stage whispered, "They figured out your secret."

Teyla threw John an annoyed look and swatted at his hand. He pulled back and chuckled while Julia's eyes got wider. "Was I right?"

John and Teyla looked at each other, nodded and John grinned, "Teyla's part Wraith."

This time Dave and Julia's eyes got wider.

Teyla rolled her eyes at John and explained, "Just as John possesses the genes and DNA of the Ancestors who inhabited this planet many thousands of years ago, Wraith DNA was introduced into my lineage many generations ago. But it is also rare, even amongst my people."

"But it means she can do some pretty cool stuff," John said.

"Yes, as you have the ability to manipulate Ancient Technology with your mind," Teyla reminded him.

John's eyes lit up. "Hey, Dave can do it, too. He accidentally brought home an LSD Rodney was working on and managed to get it working pretty well."

"So, what can you do?" Julia segued back to the original question and Teyla explained, "I can simply sense Torren's feelings."

"Wraith can do that?" Julia asked alarmed.

John answered, "Regular Wraith can just make you think they're closer than they really are, make you see things that aren't there. It's to make you run toward them or give away your position if you're hiding. Now the Wraith Queens … that's another story."

And the look on John's face told exactly how he felt about Wraith Queens. "They can get inside your head and pull out information you'd rather not tell them."

Teyla raised one eyebrow and cryptically informed them, "Unless, of course, you are John Sheppard."

At Dave and Julia's puzzled glances, John said, "I've run into more than my share of Wraith Queens in the past six years."

Teyla gave a wry smile as she went on, "And John has successfully resisted their probes on each occasion."

John gave a snort. "Frustrated the hell out of a few of them, too."

"Must have been all that practice you got as a teenager evading Dad's questioning techniques," Dave quipped. "And you left him frustrated most of the time, too."

Julia still had questions. "So Teyla …"

Teyla knew she needed to give Julia a bit more detail. "Wraith can communicate with each other non-verbally when they are in close proximity. I have the ability to get inside a Wraith mind as well."

"It's come in handy a few times, let me tell you," interjected John.

"Torren possesses Wraith DNA as well, allowing me to sense his emotions."

"So you knew he was with John by how he was feeling?"

Teyla nodded and smiled simply, "He was feeling safe and loved."

Dave now was curious. "Can you sense anyone's feelings?"

"No," Teyla denied, "Only those who have had Wraith DNA in them."

"So how did you know John was asleep the other night?" Julia asked.

John's eyes narrowed and he looked thoughtful. "Yeah, how did you know I was asleep?" He stared at Teyla for a few seconds until she dropped her eyes.

His grew more intense and he leaned in closer. "Was McKay right a few months ago when he asked about that … bug protein stuff I've got?"

Teyla took a deep breath, reached over for John's hand, looked up into his eyes and answered, "Yes."

John's face grew hard and he leaned back but Teyla kept a strong hold on his hand.

"I assure you, John, I do not sense your feelings very often. It demands much concentration and I have no desire to invade your privacy. There have been a few times, however, when your feelings have been so intense I have sensed them without meaning to."

"When?" John's face was still stony.

"When you rescued me from Michael."

John's eyes moved up in recollection and he said, "You know I heard you call my name even before I opened the door. I figured you were just guessing."

"I felt your presence," Teyla acknowledged. "And your desperation echoed my own."

John's face softened slightly but he still held Teyla's gaze.

"I know you guys are having a moment here," Dave interrupted, "But how is it you can sense John? He doesn't have Wraith DNA."

John closed his eyes and took a deep breath wondering how he could avoid this conversation. It was bad enough he'd just found out Teyla could sense his emotions. Okay, she said she rarely did it and knowing Teyla to be the decent and honest person that she was, he believed her. And felt a little relief at that.

But now he needed to reveal probably the most humiliating experience he'd lived through. And he almost hadn't. Lived through it.

He and Teyla looked at each other and John figured Teyla might be the better one to tell the story. He lifted his chin at her and she nodded in acknowledgement.

"Simply put, John was attacked by a Wraith who had been infected with an early version of a retrovirus one of our doctors was working on. John became infected and even though a cure was eventually found and John was restored to his former self, he still retains a protein marker from the ordeal."

John nodded thinking; Yup Teyla's explanation was much better than mine would have been.

But then Dave questioned, "What do you mean restored to his former self?"

John's eyes narrowed and he blurted, "I mutated into a bug!"

Dave and Julia looked horrified and Teyla gave a quick explanation of the relationship between the Iratus bug and the Wraith and how John's DNA had started changing him.

"Blue skin, scales," he informed them, "Not my finest moment. We may want to leave this tidbit of information out of the conversation at your parent's house tomorrow."

"Yeah," Julia said slowly, "That might be a very good idea, John."

"Just remember, Julia," John reminded her, "You're the one who asked. And before you ask any more questions, let me just say that's probably more than enough information for one day."

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