Ch. 3

Alice paced nervously in the common room. Her eyes kept darting toward the boys dorm. Normally, she would wait for Frank since mealtimes were the only chances they got to spend together, not counting homework. However, today she was waiting for someone else. She was waiting for the infamous James Potter.

She had recently seen her best friend, Lily, who was in an unfortunate circumstance no thanks to Potter. During the night, she had gotten a message from the ginger in distress and rushed right to her side. Although Alice would have been fully capable of unsticking Lily, she told her not to. Then, she told Alice her plan to get back at James. Alice's only hope was that she was a good enough actress to fool the king of pranks.

James rolled out of bed and onto his yoga mat for his morning stretches. He read in the latest issue of the medical journal he steals from the Ravenclaw that yoga in the morning is a great way to stay on shape and James needed to be in the best shape possible if he wanted to be crowned this year's 'sexiest prankster' award by the Mischief Monthly magazine he subscribed to. James found some of the prank ideas to be amateur. He only read it for the recipes...not that James cooked.

When James had finished his stretches he showered and dressed for class. He noticed that Sirius had yet to get up, Remus was in the shower, and Peter was probably down at breakfast.

In James' mind, breakfast means two things: food and Lily. More importantly, Lily eating food. He was always the way Lily would flip the eating utensil upside down before pulling it out of her mouth. Although, sometimes, when she caught him watching, she would pull the spoon or fork out slowly, seductively and James, losing his cool, would knock over his goblet of pumpkin juice into his lap. Then, as if seeing his cue, some first year Slytherin would walk by, taunting him by saying, "you wet yourself, you wet yourself!"

James shuddered at the echoing sound of the taunting Slytherin, but was quick to brush it off, remembering the self empowering, anti-bullying mind exercises he read in the medical journal he steals from the Ravenclaw two months ago.

As James strolled down into the common room, he was ambushed by Alice.

"You were with Lily last night, right?" she asked, her face was slightly pale and her eyes wide with fear.

"I was, but Remus was the last to see her, I believe," James paused. "Well, other than you since you see her before she goes to sleep."

"That's just it!" Alice cried, bursting into tears, a little dramatic in James' opinion, but it still caused a knot to form in his stomach.

"What do you mean?"

"Lily! She didn't come back last night. I woke up sometime around midnight and saw her bed was empty, but thought nothing of. I mean, I thought she was with you. She has been a little more rebellious since you two started dating," Alice sniffed.

"She has?"

"Well, I mean, she switched books in the restricted section for ones in the general reading section in the library for no apparent reason," Alice continued. "Anyways, when I woke up and her bed was still empty! I was about to think that she was down at breakfast when my owl, Haiyu, gave me this."

James, now with his stomach doing pirouettes, and his blood cold as Winnepeg in the winter, took the note that Alice's shaking hand was holding out to him. It looked to have been hastily scrawled onto a page ripped out of some book. It read: Alice, help, Lily.

That was the last straw for James. He frantically dashed up the stairs to the boys dorm and threw himself at his trunk, flinging it open. Throwing his contents left and right all over the dormitory.

"What are you looking for?" Sirius muffled from his bed.

"The map!" James shouted, while launching his beloved broomstick across the room.

"Calm down, Prongsie," Sirius sat up. "It's right here."

James snatched the map up and quickly opened it, pouring over it's content. IT was then when Remus decided to enter the room.

"What was that noise?" Remus asked, coming out from the bathroom. He was promptly pushed against the wall by a livid James.

"Where did Lily go?"

"What?"

"Where. Did. Lily. GO!"

"I haven't seen her James! Calm down," Remus grunted.

"Last night! She was with you, where did she go!"

"She said something about taking a bath, why?"

James flung himself back at the map, pouring over its contents as though his life depended on it.

"Whathappened?" Remus inquired, fixing his robes.

"Lily didn't come back last night from the bathroom, apparently," James muttered. His eyes passed over hundreds of students who were obviously stuck to doorknobs. Then, he saw her. She was just at head's bathroom, but she wasn't moving, especially since she'd been there all night...

"Oh no! SHE DROWNED!" James wailed as he launched himself out of the dorm. Remus, Sirius, and Alice were right behind him.

James was seen by the school as a lunatic as he raced through the school shouting Lily's name at the top of his lungs.

James rounded the corner and raced down the hall that lead to the head's bathroom. As he drew closer, he saw Lily, in a towel, leaning against her arm. James followed Lily's arm to see her hand fastened to the doorknob. He screeched to a halt and kneeled at his girlfriend's curled up body. She looked like she was sleeping, but her usual unusually white skin had a grayish hue to it.

"LILY!" James bawled. "I killed you through my ruthless, selfish desire to get some attention."

James unstuck Lily's hand from the doorknob and cradled her body, still in sobs.

"Uh, James?" Sirius said,

"NOT NOW PADFOOT!" James roared and continued his wallowing. Sirius closed his mouth. He figured that his friend would eventually notice the smile on Lily's face and the fact she was trying really hard not to laugh.

"Why is she gray?" Remus muttered.

"You trying being there all night. It gets cold," Alice replied. Remus and Sirius looked at her and realized the whole scene was a hoax.

Meanwhile, James was still crying over Lily, "I killed you Lils! In cold blood I killed you!"

"Last time I heard of death due to a hand stuck to a doorknob was...never," Lily finally said. She couldn't take hearing James cry, but she did enjoy a sweet slice of vengeance.It was in the form of chocolate cake.

"I want chocolate cake," Lily mused. She stood up, still keeping a firm grip on her towel. She disappeared into the bathroom and emerged in her robes again.

"But-what?" James asked, still kneeling on the ground.

"Think about it," Lily smiled, pat the boy on the head and walked away with Alice tailing her.

James watched her walk away. "I was tricked wasn't I?" Remus and Sirius nodded. Normally, James would have been put out, but in this instance his only reaction was, "one day we will have babies!"

AN: hope the end wasn't too awkward. It was slightly inspired by some crazy crew member that swoons over one Darren Criss.Leave a review!