Ch.11
AN: these chapters are becoming fast because I am ready to be done with this story, as fun as it is. Worse comes to worse, I'll just have Voldemort randomly come in a kill everyone (because really, that's all he wants). End of story, painless and quick.
James stepped out of the fireplace of his house Godric's Hollow. He was running a few errands in Diagon Alley when he heard of a Death Eater attack in the town nearby. He quickly finished his errands and returned to the Leaky Cauldron. He and Lily had been in hiding for the past four and a half months. They jumped every time they heard of an attack.
Their paranoia had gotten to be so bad, Lily even suggested they go on the run, leave the country. James knew of a quaint place in Wales. Lately, he found himself thinking more and more about it. To be honest, the easiest thing for the two of them would be to move to Wales. they could hide as muggles. Voldemort would never think to look for them there.
The sight of Lily always made him smile. For a minute, James felt all his worries and fears dissolve like four sugar cubes in coffee. He preferred his coffee with four sugars. No cream though, that ruined the symbol. James liked making the things he drank symbols. For instance, with the coffee: he put four sugars in it to show that even thought the dark color hadn't changed, the taste was sweeter. It showed him that despite the darkness the war brought with it, he still had love and his family standing by his side. And that was enough to get through however many cups of black coffee he had to endure.
"Lily what are you eating?" James asked, having been distracted from his deep level of thinking to whatever the hell it was on his wife's plate. She was in the ranking for giving birth to the poster boy prophecy child. She took her competition seriously. Even though there was only one other person she was going up against. Nevertheless, Lily was in it to win it.
"I had the hugest craving for cornflakes, French toast, and Rocky Mountain Oysters. So, I put all three together on one magnificent, delicious, satisfying meal," Lily said, licking syrup and powdered sugar off of what James figured to be a poor bull's bollock. He cringed when she then took a giant bite out of said bollock.
"That is...some craving you got there."
"Did you get the pumpkin juice? I'm thirsty."
James reached into his bag and pulled out the liquid his wife sent him out for. He poured some in a glass and set it beside her. She picked it up, took a deep gulp of the juice and returned to her 'meal.'
"I left a plate for you," Lily said, she looked over her shoulder to see James' reaction to the plate that was charmed to look like what she was eating. He looked down at the plate and gagged.
"You know, Lils, I'm not hungry," James said, plastering an apologetic look on his face.
"Oh, that's too bad," Lily gave her wand a little wave, lifting the charm on the plate. "I had made you steak and kidney pie."
James gaped at the plate. He looked up at Lily. The disguise the plate as something else scheme. He should have seen it coming! He'd done that numerous times at Hogwarts. "I think I've met my match."
"Who would think that the great pranking James Potter would be trumped by his own wife?" Lily teased. James rolled his eyes and tucked into his dinner. After the silence became too much to bear, he decided to share his new idea for hiding from Voldemort.
"Lily, I've been thinking. When the baby is born, we can go to Wales and start a new life as a muggle family."
"A muggle family? What will we do for money? I can't exactly work as soon as I have a baby. Besides, there's not much you can do above minimum wage," Lily reasoned.
"I've thought of all of that my flower," James assured. "We will take some wizard money and transfer to muggle money. We will leave the country and settle in Wales for about four months or so."
"And what happens after four months?"
"We go on the road!" James exclaimed. He hoped that his wife was just as excited about his idea as he was.
"Travelling?"
"No, we'll be the first European rapping family! I've already thought of rap names for everyone."
"Rapping family?" James had been a bit tense lately and hadn't been sleeping lately. Lily figured that he had finally lost it.
"Great, right? We can spread a message of helping your neighbors and making friends while building vocabulary with the use of advanced words. Our rhymes could possibly change the world. Parents will bring their kids to our shows. We could change the rap/R&B world forever!"
"James, what about the baby?"
"He, or she, will go on tour with us. How great would that look if we had our whole family together, spreading the good word? When the kids are old enough, they can rap with us!" The more James said his idea out loud, the more he was convinced that it would work.
Lily looked at the man sympathetically. Sure, she's had her fair share of happy ending fantasies, but nothing compared to what James was suggesting. The extent of her fantasies was that Voldemort would spontaneously combust when the baby was born, or that she could throw a bucket of water on him and he'd melt.
"James, are you serious?"
"Completely," James continued. "You see, for our group name, we could be the Pott3rz, with a three because there's three of us. You can be Lilz, with a 'z,' I will be Jaymz–,"
"Let me guess, with a 'z'?"
"Yes! And jay, like a blue jay to show people that we are a family that listens to our hearts and do what their hearts tell them to do."
"Will our kids have names with 'z's as well?"
"Depends on the name," James beamed at Lily. What was Remus talking about, married couples not seeing eye to eye all the time? He and Lily were always on the same page and they have been married for eight months now.
Lily buried her head in her hands. He still wasn't getting it. Maybe if he had some sleep, he would start thinking clearly again. Lily was pretty sure she had a sleeping potion in the cabinet.
"Hey, James, why don't I make you a cup of tea. We can talk more about this 'rapping family' idea of yours.," Lily disappeared into the kitchen. She set the dishes to clean themselves and set about to making a pot of tea. She took a sleeping potion and poured it into the cup and covered the stuff with tea. To further hide the taste of the potion, she put two tablespoons of honey and a squirt of lemon.
"You won't believe the things you've been saying when you wake up tomorrow," she whispered to the cup. Maybe drugging your husband wasn't exactly the right thing to do, but James needed sleep and she will tell him what happened in the morning. He'll understand...unless he was really in his right ming with the whole rapping family thing. There was no way she was going around with a 'z' in her name.
James woke up, but kept his eyes closed. He wasn't quite sure, but he thought he could hear Lily sleeping beside him. Yes, it was Lily sleeping beside him, he could hear her breathing, slowly and peacefully. At least expecting a child took her mind off of the war. As for himself, it may have been the first night he had actually slept. It felt good, refreshing, like he could take on the world, one Z at a time. Wait, Z?
James frowned, wondering why he was thinking of the last letter of the alphabet. He remembered a dream he had during the night about him teaching his son the alphabet song in Spanish and figured he was just thinking of the dream he'd had. \
Taking a deep breath, James decided to stay in bed for a few more minutes. Just as well, Lily had put her head on his chest.
"Morning, Lils," James greeted.
"Morning," Lily replied from a distance. James' eyes flashed open and he looked up. He could see Lily's figure standing in the doorway. After placing his glasses on his face, he looked down at the weight on his chest and saw a big, black, shaggy dog.
"AHHHH!" James leapt from the bed. "Sirius! Don't do that!"
Sirius jumped from the bed and turned back into a human, doubled over laughing.
"Sorry, mate, couldn't resist," Sirius sputtered in between gasps for air. "Lily told me all about your idea to start a Welsh rapping family."
"Welsh what? Rapping what?" James looked over at Lily, who was snickering. "I'm going back to sleep. When I wake up, there will be no dogs greeting me with morning breath, and absolutely NO Welsh rapping family. I don't care how cool it sounds because that sounds pretty dang cool.
"Also, when I wake up, I would like breakfast. Two eggs, scrambled. Toast, wheat preferably, with butter and boysenberry jam. I would also like a side of bacon. Three strips, extra crispy," James removed his glasses and crawled back into bed. Even though he knew that he wouldn't be sleeping for long, he figured closing his eyes for a few minutes more couldn't hurt. He could further plan his revenge against Sirius.
"That sounds like a good breakfast," Lily said to Sirius as she pulled out pans to cook.
"It does, may I have some?"
"Scramble the eggs, but just for James and you."
"What about you?" Sirius inquired.
"There are still some Rocky Mountain oysters, waiting for me to eat," Lily said, her mouth watering at the thought of toast and bollocks.
AN: for those of you who haven't gathered what Rocky Mountain Oysters are, they're the testicles of a bull. Please review!