Author: LadyFromPoland

Disclaimer: I don't own "Merlin". It is a TV show which belongs to BBC.

Warning: SLASH

English is not my mother language.

I'm aware that it took a while but I hope that it was worth waiting for. Although that chapter is not perfect, I'm quite proud of it. Enjoy! And the Happy New Year! :)

Dearest to his heart

Chapter 4

"The beginning"

Lady Miranda took a seat in front of the mirror in her chamber. She looked at her own reflection and noticed the irritation and annoyance there. It didn't suit the noble lady so she got nervous even more.

"What's wrong, my lady?" Kiara went into the room and saw the state of her mistress. "You look disturbed."

"Disturbed?" The princess shook her head. "I'm irritated!"

Kiara didn't say anything. She felt that her mistress was willing to tell her some details.

"Merlin..." she hissed. "As I told you before, Arthur had gone for a horse ride with him and hadn't even thought about me. However you have no idea what happened when they finally came back. Arthur could only talk about that Merlin... it's frustrating! And ridiculous!"

"Calm down, my lady," the maid suggested. "You asked me to get some information about the Court Magician and I did."

Lady Miranda looked at her servant. "Go on," she encouraged the girl.

Kiara started brushing the princess's red locks. "First of all, Merlin used to be Arthur's manservant," the girl almost whispered.

"Really?" Miranda raised her eyebrows.

"Yes, my lady. He's become the Court Magician when Arthur took his place on the throne." The maid fell silent for a few seconds, recalling facts that she'd received. "Some people say that the king lifted the ban on magic because of Merlin," Kiara said smoothly. "I've heard that they both have been close for a very long time."

"So it's not going to be easy," the noble lady mumbled, sighing.

"What, my lady?" the maidservant asked curiously.

"Merlin and Arthur are too close..." the princess hissed through her teeth. "I need to destroy the bond that exists between them. Otherwise I will not fulfil my plans and I won't become a queen."

"I'm sorry, my lady, but I need to ask you." Kiara put the brush on the dressing table and looked carefully at her mistress. "Is that warlock really such a problem? What can he do?"

"He can do more than he knows," Miranda said quietly. "I've never seen such a strong bond between two males. That bond will always be an obstacle. Merlin will always be more important than me."

"I don't really understand... you can use your charm to win Arthur's heart, my lady. It shouldn't be difficult."

Miranda smiled. "I can seduce him but my charm will be weaker and weaker with every day. My only chance to become a queen of Camelot is to get rid of Merlin." Her smile turned into smirk. "Once and ever."

oOoOo

It was an early evening but Merlin sat alone in his chamber, trying to read his first book of magic. Although he had used it many times, it still surprised him from time to time. Besides the man had some sort of sentiment for that book and even though now he had plenty of magic books, that was still his favourite one.

However this time looking through the pages couldn't be fruitful. The warlock's thoughts were focused on something else. He couldn't erase the images of Arthur and Miranda from that day. They both seemed to be very close and it pained Merlin more than he could say. Although he wasn't going to say it to anyone.

After some time he simply closed the book and watched the flames of candles. Each of them was somehow lonely. They weren't far away from one another but each of them had its own light and didn't really need the others. Merlin felt just like one of that candles. He was close to Arthur but still there was a distance between them. The warlock started to feel it since the day when Miranda had arrived at Camelot. She made Merlin feel lonely because she took Arthur away from him. The trip that he and the king had was unforgettable but it was just a trip, a few hours. Miranda could spend with the king every free minute of his time.

Merlin had promised to himself once that he would have never cried because of Arthur. However once again he was close to break that promise, which now seemed to be an empty phrase.

Suddenly someone knocked on the door of his chambers. For a few precious seconds the warlock thought that it was Arthur. He hoped that his friend wanted to spend some time with him and him only. He really missed the evenings when they both could sit in comfortable silence, laughing from time to time because of a joke that one of them said. The joke that wouldn't have been so funny if it was said by someone else.

"Come in," Merlin said as quietly as he managed.

The door was open and he saw a young maid. He recognized her as Lady Miranda's servant.

The girl bowed lightly and then looked up at him. "I'm sorry for disturbing you but I have a message from my mistress, princess Miranda."

"I know who's your mistress," the man said. He noticed a slight confusion on her young face. She must have been surprised that he remembered her. "What's the message then?" Merlin asked after a while of silence.

The maid smiled shyly. "Princess Miranda wants to talk with you about your magic, sir," she said quickly.

"My magic?" He frowned.

"Yes, sir."

"Don't call me sir, please," Merlin told her. "I don't really like it. Besides I wasn't born a nobleman or someone like that."

"Of course," the girl agreed.

"Very well." The warlock straightened. "And could you tell me why Lady Miranda wants to talk about magic?"

"She's curious," Kiara answered. "I don't know any details. If you agree, you will able to ask her on your own."

Merlin wasn't sure what to think. There was something strange about it.

"When would your mistress like to talk?" he asked, deciding that he could risk one, small conversation with that lady.

"As soon as possible," the girl said quietly. "Princess Miranada suggested tomorrow's noon."

The sorcerer sighed inwardly. Miranda wanted to meet with him in time when Arthur was busy. At the next day's noon the king was supposed to attend the training with the knights. He couldn't train them himself since as the king he had much more duties, but at least once a two weeks he tried to watch over their trainings. Lancelot and Leon had taken charge and they took care of the knights but Arthur wanted to keep an eye on everything too. It, on the one hand, was very prattish, but on the other it was quite cute.

"Fine," Merlin said finally. "Did she suggest where that meeting should take place?"

"Yes. Princess Miranda thinks that your room has a magic atmosphere. She'd like to see you here, if you don't mind." The girl fell silent, waiting for man's answer.

"I don't mind," the warlock said after a few seconds of hesitation. Something was telling him that it was a mistake but his curiosity was stronger than common sense.

"I'll bring good news to my mistress," Kiara said smiling and bowed lightly.

Merlin couldn't see the smirk upon her face when she left his chamber.

oOoOo

Kiara helped her mistress prepare for the meeting with the Court Magician. The final effect was stunning. Lady Miranda was very pleased. She had to look perfect in front of Merlin. She wanted to see the sorrow and pain in his eyes. It was one of the first aims that she was going to receive in the nearest days.

The princess' hair was perfectly curly and glowing when she entered Merlin's chamber. Besides she was wearing one of her favourite dresses which made her look even more graceful and beautiful. Everything about her was in that moment in the perfect harmony.

"I'm sorry that my request was so sudden. I know that it can be a bit improperly but I just couldn't wait." Merlin had to admit that it sounded innocently. Too innocently.

"It's nothing, my lady," he assured her.

The princess smiled. "Please, call me Miranda. There's no need for the titles."

Merlin nodded politely. "Well, then... Please, take a seat."

They both sat in the comfortable armchairs. "What do you want to know?" he asked then.

"Anything." She gazed around. "I don't really know much about magic and it seems quite exciting. I was growing up in the kingdom where hardy anybody practised it. And I... I was always curious how it worked."

"You will not understand how it works if you don't have it. It's practically impossible," the sorcerer said candidly. "I tried to explain it hundreds of times to Arthur but he has never truly understood."

Miranda watched Merlin's face very carefully when he was talking about the king. He had the affection written on his face. It was more than obvious. She couldn't really believe that the whole Camelot didn't know about it.

"I see..." she said quietly. "Can you then show me a few tricks?" the lady asked. "If I cannot understand it technically then maybe I'll, at least, feel it."

"I can do that," Merlin agreed. He looked at the bookcase and then his eyes shone gold. A few magic books drifted in the air and landed on the table in front of them.

"Amazing," Miranda whispered. "Can I...?"

"Of course."

The princess opened the first of the books and started looking through its pages. "It all seems so complicated," she said. "That language... How can you even pronounce that words?"

"It's really difficult for someone who has no magic. However I was born with that gift. Before I had come to Camelot I hadn't known any spells. I just had my instinct. The magic was always a part of me. When I had got my first book of magic I just knew how to use it... how to read that strange words. I think that it's a part of my gift."

"It's hard to believe." Suddenly she sighed.

"Has something happened?" Merlin asked politely. He didn't like the princess at all but she was his guest. He couldn't be unsympathetic.

"I just wonder how difficult was your life when magic was banned here in Camelot." She closed the book. "I've heard that you were Arthur's manservant..."

"That's true," Merlin admitted. "I'm not trying to erase that part of my life. It was quite important." He made himself smile.

"You needed to serve a man whose father would have killed you if he had only found out about your powers. Weren't you afraid?" she asked.

"I would have been a fool if I wasn't," the warlock told her. "But I needed to protect Arthur. I don't want to sound arrogant but without my help Arthur wouldn't have survived."

"I can imagine," Miranda mumbled. "I can't believe that you've done so much for him. It's really brave to care so deeply for a man who would never care for you the same way."

Merlin swallowed hard. His heart quickened immediately. He looked up at Miranda with disbelief. He wasn't sure if she meant what he feared she did. It was impossible that she knew the truth. After all nobody had the foggiest idea about it. At least it was what Merlin hoped.

"What do you mean?" the sorcerer asked with a trembling voice. He just couldn't let go of that comment.

Miranda smiled at him and if Merlin didn't know better he would have thought that she sympathized with him. "Don't pretend..." she said. "I can see the way you look at him... I can see the sparks in your eyes when you talk about him."

Merlin looked down. He didn't want to watch the amusement in her eyes. She could play the role of a cute and caring princess in front of Arthur, but she couldn't fool him. "I don't really know what you're talking about," the man murmured, even though it was pointless. Miranda knew everything and now she could use that information to bully him. She was already doing that.

"You're such a poor man." The woman sighed lightly. "But self-denying is only going to make things worse. It must hurt... so much..."

The warlock had to use all strong will that he possessed to not put some terrible spell on Miranda. He knew too well that she had a fun of him but he didn't want give her the satisfaction by reacting in rash way.

The princess put gently her hand on Merlin's and continued. "You must have known that Arthur was going to marry a woman one day," she said smoothly. "He's a king and he needs to carry on a dynasty. It was always the point, wasn't it?"

That was enough for one visit. Merlin wasn't going to listen her sweet and caring, but most of all artificial, words of compassion. "Can you leave me?" he asked suddenly but it sounded more like an order, like a threat.

"Of course," the princess whispered. "I'm so sorry... I didn't mean to sadden you."

Merlin turned his gaze away. He didn't want to give her the satisfaction of seeing his broken face.

Miranda left the chamber quietly. She was highly satisfied. She did what she had planned. Everything went even better than she'd hoped.

"My lady?" Kiara looked at her mistress curiously.

The princess smirked evilly. "It was so simple," she said aloud. "Merlin is such a vulnerable man... I would pity him if I didn't want to get rid of him in the first place." Miranda looked through the window. She saw Arthur who was coming back to the castle. "He's going to be easy to break."

"Do you have more ideas, princess Miranda?" the girl asked her.

The noble lady turned around and smiled victoriously at her maid. "Of course. It was only the beginning."

I'm so excited! Please, let me know what you think. It's a bit angst but you need to get use to it. That's the way it has to be.