Middle Earth High

Breakfast Bully

Pippin was bored. He had reserved the breakfast table ten minutes ago and, still, Merry, Sam and Frodo were nowhere to be seen. By this time, the dining room was filled to the brim with new and old students. Feeling betrayed and abandoned by his absent friends, Pippin began his own search for Eowyn's soon-to-be soul mate.

Scanning the room, he took note of the evolving social groups of his year. Misfits ... bimbos ... nerds. Then, in the corner of his eye, Pippin noticed a group of buff, deep-voiced Neanderthals. Boromir's friends! he thought. Squinting, Pippin realized that there was one missing from their group; an empty chair. I wonder how much they know about Boromir's crush on Eowyn? Just thinking of their reaction made his stomach leap with anticipation; so he made his way over, strolling as casually as he could chanting to himself: slouched shoulders, hands in pockets, slouched shoulders, hands in pockets, slouched shoulders ... wuzzup chin nod and smile for the ladies ... equals ultimate coolness.

"W-T-F, like, what is up with that midget's chin? It's like there's a hook in it ... and it's, like, pulling him or something ... you know? From his chin ... and that ... wait, is that even a smile? Whatever it is - gross!"

"Oh my quantum nebular! I believe, my friends, that the hobbit over there is exceeding us in what our peers refer to as 'nerdy-ness' ... quick! Take notes before it's over!"

Don't worry, Pippin, they're all just jealous they don't have the walk of ultimate coolness.

"Yo, dork!" shouted the biggest ape of Boromir's group.

"Sup," Pippin ventured.

The group burst into grunts of laughter.

"Uh ... so, have you guys heard about Boromir's latest love interest?"

"What love interest? What do you know, midget?"

Pippin clenched his teeth. "Heard of Eowyn?"

The smarter ones, which consisted of two out of the fourteen, looked skeptical. "Bor's never mentioned her," one snorted.

Boar ... suits him. Hmm ...

An idea popped into Pippin's head while a mischievous smile crept over his face. "That's because, uh, last summer ... Boar had a little animal action." Pippin wiggled his eyebrows up and down.

They all stared at him blankly.

"You know ..." Pippin rolled his eyes, "s-"

"Hey, Midget."

Pippin shuddered. "Boromir," he said curtly.

"You about ready to get lost?"

Grumbling unintelligibly, Pippin turned his back to Boromir's group who were now laughing maniacally.

"Loser." He heard over his shoulder.

END OF CHAPTER

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