Oh my god you guys, I'm so sorry! I kind of got a lot of drama going on in my life, and so this McDreamTeam (yes, that's my ship name for them) was kind of put on pause. I know I did some Glee/Klaine stuff, but that's because they were quick one-shots and helped me with getting my head straight. Um, hopefully this will not stop my story now.
This chapter is strange. I don't like it too much, but I hope you guys will! Thank you!
011. Disgust
There would always be that certain level of disgust. People would always think that love between tow guys or two girls would be completely disgusting and would never want it to happen. What was even worse was that there would probably be patients, or even their peers, that would think that they're disgusting. It couldn't happen because they had to stay professional and keep their relationship out of it. But the two of them, they couldn't. There was no way possible for the two of them to keep their relationship and their work separate. So, people would know. People always knew.
Mark Sloan laid in be looking up at the ceiling and listening to the sound of the rain hitting his apartment's window. It seemed like he spent a lot of time in his dark room lately. In his defense there were a lot of weird things happening lately for him to think about, so it was natural to think about them in his room.
What happened between him and Derek outside the hospital was still reeling around his head. Mark needed to know what this meant because he was pretty sure that he couldn't take for granted what had happened. This wasn't an invitation for Mark to just waltz in and replace Meredith. They had to keep their personal lives out of work. The two were too intermingled though. How were you suppose to completely block out something when it was right there in front of you all the time. It wasn't as simple as shutting out Derek. Not when he was there. There, all the time.
Sitting up in bed, Mark ran a hand through his hair. In his own way he was disgusted. Not by the idea of having a gay relationship, but because he was thinking about this too much. Thinking got him in trouble. Never in his life had Mark sat and thought about something like this. Well, so much as he was now. It was clouding his judgment. The last thing that he needed was to go to work the next day and not be able to think. It made himself sick just thinking of the mistakes that he could make because he was thinking too much.
Derek. It was always Derek. When Mark had told him that he came to Seattle for him, he wasn't lying. Addison was a side treat that Mark got, but it really was Derek. Everything was because of Derek. Everything. Mark was a man-whore because in high school he and Derek competed for the girls, and Mark hated to lose. He slept with Addison, not just because Addison was hot, but because Mark felt like he was being forgotten and this was the best way to get Derek's attention again.
The idea of what Mark did or would do for Derek kind of disgusted him. Not in the sense that he was going to make himself stop, but it was the whole idea that Derek had that much power over him. It kind of scared him. Mark sighed. He didn't know why he even bothered coming home. He knew damn well that he wouldn't be getting sleep, so why didn't he just stay at the hospital? At least there he would have an excuse to use.
At least an excuse that he could say to his peers without getting judged. Sighing again, Mark laid back down with some force and stared at the ceiling. It was going to be a long night.