A/N I don't own anything of Harry Potter's world. I just play with it for my personal satisfaction.
Chapter 3
Insolent Brat,
I don't care about you! I care about my supply of life energy. You being that supply is a little detail.
This said, I think I've a solution for your little problem. I will send you an emissary to teach you how to apparate. You told me about the wards and the no-marked people inside rule. I've the right person to bypass them. Furthermore, they will be able to incapacitate, temporarily or not, your guards. (Insert here: Evil grin)
But first of all I need your address.
-0-
Hey Moldy,
Are you really insane or what? Scratch that, you are insane!
But, do you think that I'm THAT stupid? I'm not going to give you my address like that.
I have a few conditions. First of all, no killing, from your hand or anybody following your orders or following even a mere suggestion on your part. That's go for me or anybody related to me in any fashion.
I want to live old enough to see my revenge succeed. Furthermore, I want all of THEM to be alive and kicking when it occurs. With their full capacities, it would be more delightful. (Insert here: evil cackle... oops, I mean rightful teenage anger).
In second and third places, no maiming and no torture, for the same reasons as above.
Finally, I want your wizard oath that your emissary will do no harm. And I want an oath from Lord Voldemort and from Tom Marvolo Riddle. No loophole. (Insert here: little smirk)
-0-
Have you already forgotten pea-brain, that at the moment I'm draining you? I don't intend to kill you as I'm using you to regain my health. And stop insulting ME!
Moreover, your revenge is more entertaining than my boring followers.
That's very clever of you to ask two oaths. Few wizards know the subtleties of oath for different personalities in a same person.
If I swear an oath as Lord Voldemort and not as Riddle, with focus on my Riddle persona I could bend the oath and hurt you.
Indeed, that was very clever of you to ask... Just for pure knowledge, where did you find the information?
Ok! Here we go for the oath:
I Tom Marvolo Riddle aka Lord Voldemort swear on my magic to not bring harm directly or indirectly and knowingly to one Harry James Potter before telling him directly. This oath run from now on, but for only two months.
Here! Are you happy?
Oh, by the way, I'm going to drain you with that little parchment in which you write on. As you see I'm following the wording of the oath. (Insert here: Evil smirk)
And before you ask stupid questions, two months is for the summer vacations. You can't expect that I keep this oath all my life. (Insert here: evil laugh)
-0-
Yes I'm happy.
For your information, I learned the tidbit of knowledge when I was researching Fidelius chams and secret keepers in third year. I found a book on the the different types of protection. There was a section on wizard oaths.
So here it goes: 4 Privet Drive, Little Whinging, Surrey.
-0-
VOLDEMORT, ARE YOU INSANE? (Yes, I already know the answer!)
YOU SENT ME NAGINI, FOR MERLIN SAKE!
I nearly died from a heart attack. And how could she travel unnoticed? She's a big big BIG snake! And how she found me?
Oh by the way, she's a great teacher (far better than Snape). I know how to apparate.
I didn't know she had a sharp sense of humor. She's so funny!
If everything fails send her to me, I would like to test a few of her suggestions on my family. (Insert here: large grin)
Say "hi" to her, for me.
-0-
WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY SNAKE?
SHE'S MY FAMILIAR, NOT YOURS!
She can't stop talking about you. How funny your are, how intelligent, how good pupil... and she goes like this for HOURS!
Did you think I kept her just to scare everybody around me? Well she does that too, and so well!
You should see everybody recoil when she slither in a meeting cracking a jock. Sometimes it's very hard not to laugh.
Why I'm telling you this? (Insert here: incredulous look)
And for all your questions: I'm a dark lord. No.
I'm THE Dark Lord! I can do things that you can't even imagine in your wildest dreams!
With the coordinates you gave me, I just made a portkey with a few charms of protection, and a desillusion charm for every eyes except people talking in parseltongue. It was sooo simple and elementary! Nobody sew her as she slithered in the neighborhood. (Insert here: Evil cackle)
So as Nagini keep bragging (stop that right now, Nagini) on how you could apparate right from one end of your garden to the other, I presume you are able to transport yourself to Gringott for the reading.
Nagini says "hi" to you. (Insert here: Big sigh) Now stop pouting stupid snake!
-0-
Hey Nagini,
Yes I'm ready to go to Gringott, thanks to my teacher.
I'm going to begin to kick a few asses.
Hmmm, dear (Megalomaniac) Voldy, you told me that I'm quite inept in wizarding traditions. Well, I was wondering if in your megalomaniac Dark Lordship you would lend me Nagini to help me. You know, just to assure that the first step of the revenge go without an itch.
Oh and I already have a familiar. It's my owl. I miss Hedwig so much.
-0-
You are talking to me first and to my snake in second! Better, you don't talk to my snake! I'm Lord Voldemort! You talk to ME!
I will lend you my familiar. I will send her like the last time. (No, I'm not bipolar!)
I don't do this for you. I do this because you could botch a plan as simple as your pathetic revenge. Furthermore, I will get rid of Nagini and her incessant chat about you. She's driving me crazy!
And I don't want my followers to know about my little hobby with you. So I can't send them to you.
OK. Once Nagini is with you, tap the portkey with your wand. It will shrink her and glamour her as a necklace. From that point, you are all alone.
Be aware that I want a report of all your actions and all the consequences. I want to know the reactions of the Light side.
And if you hint that I care about you, I will torture you so badly at the end of the two months, that you will wish to not have been born!
(Insert here: Evil growl) Nagini says "hello".
A.N.: Next chapter is about Gringott.
I would like to thanks all my reviewers.
As you can see this story will be Dumbledore bashing. If you want to preserve a character from the bashing let me know.