Mini-chapter, but it just felt like I couldn't NOT make it a mini-chapter, you know? I think it's time we had a mini-chapter, anyway, don't you?
Annnd CP Coulter owns these characters!
Chapter 9
"Oh," Julian caught Logan's arm as Logan walked past him on his way to the bathroom. "I need you for something."
"What is it?" Logan turned, all thoughts of how it was late and he was tired and he needed to go to the bathroom flying out of his head.
"Come here." Julian pulled Logan by the arm into his bedroom. What he was about to do was mean, very, very mean. But he had to do it.
"Okay, Logan. I'm an asshole, I want you to remember that," he said as he pulled Logan onto his bed.
Logan's eyes were wide, he was obviously trying to stay calm, but it wasn't working.
"And I know it, and nothing you tell me in the next few days will matter, because I need to do this." Julian laid back on his bed, Logan was on top of him.
Slowly.
Slowly.
His heart raced.
He felt nervous.
He'd never kissed a boy before.
And he was about to do it in about the worst way possible.
With a heavy cloud of guilt over his head.
Slowly.
Lips collided, scarlet on scarlet, moving, there was a hint of tongue, Logan's cheek was pressed against Julian's, his hands entangled in Julian's hair, and Julian wanted to cry.
It felt good.
It felt very, very good to kiss John Logan Wright III.
It felt right.
But it was wrong. Because of what Julian knew he had to do.
He pulled away, because he had to, not because he wanted to. He would kiss Logan all night if he could.
Logan just looked at him, those green eyes staring into Julian's.
This was the only way.
Only.
Way.
Julian couldn't do it.
He couldn't.
"I'm sorry, Logan, I don't think I'm gay."
Julian felt numb.
He didn't even notice Logan standing up slowly, looking heartbroken, hurt, the same look Julian had seen him wear before only now it was directed at Julian and hadn't Julian promised himself that he would never, ever make Logan feel that way?
He wanted to call after Logan, but he remember that he couldn't love Logan, he wasn't allowed to be gay, Logan was a jerk…
That heartbreak, though…
All of a sudden, it rushed at Julian: he was an idiot. That was not necessary. He didn't need to do that, there were other ways.
He'd just thought that it was the only way to make Logan believe him.
The only way for Logan to really think that Julian wasn't gay.
That was stupid.
Really stupid.
Idiot.
It was too late, Logan was turning around and walking away, and he was slamming Julian's door and he was banging around in the hallway and Julian was crying on his bed and what had he done?