Your reviews are why I do this, keep them coming.

CP Coulter owns these characters.

I won't be able to update so much this week because it's tech week for my play. So I'm sorry about that, I'll do what I can.

Oh and by the way, I have all sorts of extra enters and stuff that is supposed to separate different scenes, but I noticed that on it doesn't recognize those, so it doesn't do that and you can't really tell when one scene ends and the next begins. It just sort of looks like it's a random scene-change that is awkward and weird. Or am I the only one who thinks that? I hope it wasn't too confusing, and I'm going to try different things to put in ways to separate scenes. Sorry!

Chapter 13

"I'll talk and you'll listen, and when I'm done you will respond, but not until I'm done." Julian didn't look at Logan, but could tell just by the way Logan had walked up to him and sat on the bench and now was breathing rather erratically that he had followed orders and not taken his medication that morning.

"Okay," Logan said, sounding not at all like himself, but rather like a little boy who had just watched his first horror movie.

"I regained my memory a week or so ago. I remembered everything, and now I'm going to tell you everything. I swear on my life all of this is true. If you don't believe me, that's your problem." He took a moment to compose himself before plunging forward. "I fell in love with you in freshman year. I don't know why and I didn't know why then and I might never know why, but there it is. I tried everything I could think of to fall out of love with you, to turn myself straight again, but no matter what the hell I did, I was bisexual and I was in love with you. I dated girls. I dated guys. I dated anybody who I thought might get my mind off of you, but they were always blondes and more often than not had green eyes. None of them were you, though. None of them could ever measure up. I never loved any of them.

"You were ignorant the whole time. You fell in love with boy after boy, and each time you did, I left. I went to shoot a movie or something every time. I escaped. I would do my best to help you, because I wanted you happy. That was how I showed you my love, even though I couldn't actually show you my love.

"I came back when I thought the coast was clear, and sometimes – like with Kurt – it wasn't actually clear and you were still going crazy over the guy. I wanted to kill them all. Believe me. I wanted to murder every boy you ever looked at because you never looked at me the way you looked at them.

"I didn't, though, obviously. But it was becoming too much. I couldn't stand it anymore. So I was about to leave Dalton for good. Permanently. Never come back. And you wouldn't have even missed me, you never did. I was no one to you, while you were everything to me.

"I was leaving when I found the message from the stalker. So I couldn't go. I was stuck. At Dalton. With you. And all those boys that you thought you loved. It was hell, because I knew that you didn't really know what love was. I did. I knew what love was and I felt it for you, and you ran around like a fool falling for every guy and…Yeah. So I wanted to leave. But I couldn't.

"The rest…you know.

"So then when I had amnesia and you wouldn't tell me anything important, and I didn't know where you and I stood, and I didn't know what I'd told you when I thought I was on the verge of death…Well, I got pissed, Lo. And I was confused. I didn't know anything and you wouldn't tell me. I remembered because I overheard you and Derek fighting one morning about whether or not you should tell me everything. It all came back, and I knew that if you knew that I remembered, you'd expect us to just…be together. Be in love. And I wasn't ready for that, because for one thing I was pissed at you for not telling me anything important, and for another thing I had reasons for not telling you I was in love with you in the first place. If it got out that I was gay, it'd be terrible for my career. I didn't have the guts to do it.

"So I did the stupidest thing I've ever done. I kissed you and lied to you. Of course it turned me on. It was the best moment of my life. It felt so much better than all of the girls I've ever kissed…combined. You're amazing, Logan, and I loved kissing you. But I lied to you. I told you that it didn't turn me on. Because I was scared shitless. I didn't want you to know I was gay – bi – whatever. It doesn't…really…make sense.

"And then you started dating Kristin and I did what I always do – I let you. I just let you go and get it out of your system. And I hated every second of it. Believe me, Lo, I cannot stand myself because of what I did to you. You don't deserve that.

"Well, maybe you do a little.

"But…I love you.

"Okay, that's it. That's my story. You probably don't care at this point. I blew it. You don't deserve me, you deserve someone who can tell you when they love you. You deserve someone who doesn't get scared of his own feelings. You deserve someone who-"

"Shut up." Logan's finger was on Julian's lips. "Just shut up."

Julian shut up.

"Why would you do that? Why would you lie?" Logan's green eyes were full of fire. Julian's heart sunk.

"Because I-" Julian started, but stopped when Logan pressed his finger into Julian's lips even more.

"No. Let me talk now, okay?" Logan was silent for a moment, thinking it over, and Julian's heart pounded on his ribcage, trying to break free. "I did love you. In freshman year. I loved you for…oh, God, I don't know, I loved you for a long time. But you didn't return the feelings, you were straight, and I realized that I can't just pursue straight guys because they'll never feel the same. So I shut my feelings up and didn't tell you. I didn't let it show. I'm kind of an actor myself, but apparently, you are better than I thought you were. Eventually I stopped loving you. When Blaine came I loved him, and then I loved other guys, because you, Julian, you didn't love me back. And you never would because you weren't programmed that way. It's not that complicated. For me. But if you'd just told me…" He cursed under his breath. "If you'd just told me all of this in freshman year. It would've been…so much better than the way things actually went. And we wouldn't be like this now."

"How are we?" Julian said, because Logan had removed his finger.

Logan considered. "We aren't in love. We love each other, but we aren't in love. I love you and you love me, but maybe your love just isn't strong enough."

"What? My love isn't strong enough? Logan, you have no idea how much I-"

"If you really loved me, you'd have told me."

"I couldn't."

"You could, it's not that hard."

"Right, because you're the love expert."

"I'm better than you."

"Why are we fighting?"

"Because. You didn't tell me you loved me!"

"I COULDN'T!"

"You could."

"So what? What now? You know now, I've told you. Clearly I do love you enough. Can we just figure this out instead of fighting?"

Logan didn't have time to respond because there was a gun shot behind them. Julian blanched, jumped up, and started to run. His memories with guns weren't all that positive. Logan stared after him, before standing up and slowly following.

.

Adam was too fast. He was faster than Julian. He caught up to Julian, and, before Logan's eyes, grabbed the actor and tackled him to the ground. Logan started running, but Adam looked up and saw Logan. With crazed eyes, he raised the gun and pointed it straight at Logan. Logan stopped. He stood completely still. People watching were screaming, Logan hoped someone would jump forward to help, but no one did.

Adam dragged Julian away, still pointing the gun at Logan. Once Julian and Adam were out of sight, Logan ran after them, whipping out his phone and dialing 911.