contagious

[-]

multi-shot.

"get it right" –lea michelle (glee)

-:-

3) to get my first kiss from my biggest crush: josh hotz

i've always had the clichéd crush on josh hotz since middle school. i'm not really sure why, it could be because i've spent so many hours in the hospital watching re-runs of gossip girl, or glee, or reading classic novels by nicholas sparks—either way, i wanted my first kiss. and i wanted it to be with my long-time crush.

there aren't many memories that josh and i hold; it's not like we're best friends who clearly love each other but just don't know it yet, it's not like we're mean to each other in a flirting sense...i'm not that lucky.

but there's something about him... let's look past his good looks, or get past the fact that he charms even the teachers; he's just this one kind of guy who doesn't let his ambitions get in the way of his feelings. and he's the one person who knew about my cancer that didn't look down at me, in fact, he kind of looked up to me.

after my school had an assembly for my grade, notifying them of my condition, josh visited me end of freshman year.

he had walked in with his heart on his sleeve practically.

he even skipped past the expected mannered questions. he just got right to the point.

"are you scared?" he had asked me with these brown as chocolate solemn eyes.

i had found myself speechless for the first time, really. and then he had placed his hand on my hand and no sparks happened, but i was swooning and charmed. he then squeezed my hand and smiled a very dazzling friendly smile.

"it's okay," i remember he had said calmly, "i've got your back; just give me a call if you ever need help with something."

then he smiled at me again and got up and left.

probably one of the best moments of my life...

sitting in the white hospital bed, i glanced at my phone that was perched on the metal bed-post. i was having some tests and fluids injected in me because i'm some experiment to the doctors. we all know i'm going to die so why not play with the terminal cancer girl? she's going to die anyway!

i grabbed the phone.

"hey josh, it's dylan marvil," i breathily said.

"oh hey dyl," he replied on the other line. "what's up?"

"can you come to the hospital? room 316? i'd like to take you up on your help," i felt butterflies swarming in my stomach.

there was quiet pause and for a second i thought he hung up.

"sure," he finally said. "i'll be there soon."

-:-

josh hotz wears diesel jeans, dark wash, ralph lauren blue and white polo, he smells of ralph lauren cologne, he has warm brown eyes that remind me of melted chocolate. josh hotz is enigmatic, charming, dazzling, and patient.

i try to commit these traits to my memory as we sit on my hospital bed, talking about the horrible food at school. i find it strange in that moment that he was never a stranger, just someone that i never really bothered to talk to; due to the butterflies inflamed in my stomach.

"i swear," he claimed, "i'll die if i eat another hot dog from that school." he laughed heartily, his dark coal-black lashes fluttering, his eyes squinty.

we sober up after a few untouchable moments.

"it's okay to be scared," he broke the silence. i try not to let my emotions grab hold of the more rational side of me.

"i'm not scared," i answered, not sure if i believed my own words. he glanced at me with doubt swimming in his eyes.

"sure you're not," he sarcastically quipped.

"i'm not," i insisted.

"it's fine if you are," he said earnestly, locking eyes with me. i felt paralyzed under his intense gaze.

i looked him hard in the eyes and suddenly so much emotion just bursts from my heart or something right into my eyes.

"josh," i whispered, letting the silence hang. "i'm only sixteen,"

he nodded, not meeting my stare anymore. it was as if he was refusing it.

"i won't live to see my sisters have their kids, i won't be an aunt, i won't be able to wake up next to my husband—hell, josh, i haven't even had my first kiss." i wasn't sure why i was telling him all this because any other day, i'd be mortified for these secrets being voiced. "i won't even get to have a big white wedding," i laughed dryly and his chuckle was dry and humorless.

then he looked at me, really truly looked at me, and in that instant, i saw his eyes watery, shimmery, even perhaps damp. he really looked at me like i was some kind of, oh i don't know, some kind of angel or goddess. he looked at me like... like, he liked me or something.

"i need your help," i quickly begged.

he nodded enthusiastically, "anything."

"i need you to help me with my bucket list," i urged, pulling out a white crinkled line piece of paper from under my pillow. "this needs to happen before...before i go."

he looked up at me through those dark lashes and i felt this huge anticipation rumble. i shoved the list into his hands.

he opened the list with slow movements, exaggeratedly slow movements. i couldn't stop staring at him.

he smiled, blushed, smiled some more, then frowned.

"you're blushing," i idiotically blurted.

he locked eyes with me and smile. "we can make this happen," he avoided my comment with a beautiful smile. "but before that first kiss happens," he cockily said. "i need to take you out on a proper date."

i blushed so hard my face probably matched the color of the roses leaning in a glass vase next to the tv.

"really?"

he nodded sincerely, "your first kiss can't be in a hospital."

i take that earlier comment back—this was the best moment of mere years of life.

-:-

luckily for me, merri-lee demanded i come home for a few hours to get ready for my date. she also asked me several times if i was up to this. i enthusiastically nodded with a bright smile stamped on my face.

he picked me up at 6:00pm, right on the dot. he said to dress casually, perhaps a spring dress. he then proceeded to shake the hands of my anxious sisters, my adoring mom, and my step-dad.

"nice to meet you," he said.

after all of the small-talk, merri-lee shooed us out on our date. josh took my hand as we walked out on the steps towards his jeep.

"it's a little girly," he blushed, "but it gets the job done."

i just simply giggled, too giddy and surprised that this was happening to say anything. how could this be? the boy of my countless, hopeless dreams, wants to take me out on a date? he wants to spend time with me, me!

-:-

it's hard to explain what happened at the date, pretend this is a movie: he took me to a local pizzeria, then took me out for ice-cream after. picture this: him smiling kindly at me, talking and relating, laughing and giggling, and imagine this: i felt normal. i actually forgot, for that time being, that i was going to die.

now imagine this, us standing on the porch under the dim-lights; presume that ryan and jaime's noses are pig-pressed against the nearby window, staring outside sneakily to spy on josh and i.

"i had a great time," he admitted. "can we do this again?"

i nodded happily, feeling the bursting emotions in my heart.

"thank you," i said.

he leaned over and kissed me. his lips, soft against my chapped ones, his lips smiling against my own. my arms grew their own minds because i wrapped my hands into his messy flowed brown locks and gasped.

he pulled away after a countless, breathless moment. he was smiling so widely, it must've matched my own.

"holy shit," he whispered.

"you can say that again," i giggled, noting the breathless note in my voice. i was practically wobbling from excitement.

"best kiss," he sincerely said, a blush making its way on his face.

i cupped my hand on his face and looked up at him with serious eyes. "thank you, i mean it."

"i should be thanking you," he snorted with a playful smile. "i've liked you for so long."

that pretty much led to my second kiss, then my third, fourth, and fif—

"hey guys," jaime's voice interrupted. "don't get ahead of yourselves!"

it was my turn to blush.

jaime winked then shut the door.

"sorry," i mumbled, looking down at my feet. "she's so annoying."

josh just chortled and hugged me close to him. i inhaled his cologne and i swore from that very moment: i was in love. as in love as any fifteen or sixteen year old could possibly be.

"let's do this again," he whispered in my ear, pulling away.

i nodded.

he kissed my hand and walked back to his car. he turned around as he walked away, glanced at me with a smile on his kissable lips, and got in his car.

i slept very well that night.

-:-

first kiss + josh hotz + best night of my life...check.

[-]

review if you think i deserve one? (ps: check out my recent one-shots too please:D)

-another moment gone-